Meat, For The Full Moon In Scorpio

vintage scorpioThe Pluto transit through my 12th house has taken me places I never imagined existed.  It does offer phenomenal insight. I can’t say this is universally true, though. I have an unaspected Pluto in the 8th house. This may help me know things other people do not.

I’m on to something now, I want to talk about it. I called the only person on earth, I thought might understand. She didn’t answer the phone so now I’m here.

I’m going to have to write in code. I’m sorry about this, but it’s the only way. This might be an advantage anyway. With the specifics of my life, omitted, you might find this more accessible and real.  Because it is real. Not just for me but for you as well.

We live a lot of lies. We all do this. Most definitely our culture is all about lying at this time…and kidding ourselves. We’re all special. We’re all talented. We’re all smart. It’s not even remotely true.

But it gets even worse…

We are given status by certain people in our lives. Deny this if you want. But I can plainly see there are people in all our lives who can impact how others see and us. They have tremendous power and control. If they put you up, you’re up. If they put you down, you’re down.

I have mostly been put down in my life so I know a lot about this. Prior to this week, I didn’t really think it mattered. But now I see it does. Holy cow, does it ever.

So a person can really harm you.  And if they do, then you will be harmed.  And you can transcend this harm on a spiritual level. It’s between you and God. But on this physical plane, you will be harmed by this person(s) actions.

I’ve come to accept this. My acceptance had opened other doors, which I’m now exploring.

I think it’s pretty serious to harm a person when you’re in a position to do so, when it’s unwarranted. It’s like a double whammy. Not only do you not support them when you should, you do them damage.

Sometimes the damage is your silence or inaction. You let that person suffer, though you know on some level they don’t deserve it.  Maybe you like the squirming.

I’m thinking about that, but mostly I’m thinking about how to live as a person who has been diminished. I don’t think it’s pleasant but I also don’t think it’s that bad. Once you understand, you can see all kinds of big things you can do when you’re small.

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Meat, For The Full Moon In Scorpio — 52 Comments

  1. Elsa,

    This resonated with me.

    I have several frenemies who reach out to me, pull disappearing acts, talk about me behind my back and im that small one looking at it all.

    They continue to try to give me that up and down silence stuff. I see it all though. So every time I respond by saying something positive and uplifting they pull the disappearing act.

    I have had a lot of training with this as my mother is the longest person to do this me.

    I also met a guy who also foes this I am now finally rid of him.

    Was this what you meant?

    • “Was this what you meant?”

      Probably not. It doesn’t sound as if these people are in a position to impact your status.

      I’m talking about Pluto in Capricorn…in the 12th house.

      • I know this one!! I lived a lie for five years and lost not only what we built together but everything I had before I met him. It was all a lie! I don’t want to be bitter, but I am. I know the way is acceptance, forgiveness, and letting go. Humility… I do okay for awhile and then I’m obsessing some rather dark revenge. I’m wondering if that has something to do with my ascendant at 17 degrees Cap and sun at 15 degrees Libra. Pluto has been stationing all over my world. I’m hoping to get through this “transformation” with some integrity. “We won’t be fooled again!” What do you think Saturn will bring? Saturn return 23 degrees Cap conjunct jupiter.

  2. I’m not getting this 100% but I hope there’s some discussion because I do believe people can harm us really deeply- as in life changing. Even siblings, though obviously they’re kids for a lot of it and less aware. Spouses. Parents. Any neglect is not benign or neutral. As you say, not doing what is needed can be as bad as flat out harm. It’s another means to the same end.

    Sorry if I don’t get it and this is meaningless.

  3. Plutonian misuse of power. Very prevalent in Scorpio badly aspected maybe. Yes Elsa I have suffered from a family member whose malignment and cruelty for 20 years have transformed me into a strong woman refusing to react as a victim to her behavior. It has though ruined good relationships and generated painful and unnecessary estrangements. I grew into my maturity and identity determined to be nothing like her, and by the Grace of God I think I did.
    My question is – is there any planet that stops Pluto dead in his tracks or at least makes him slow down and take a second look? Saturn tries a lot but I’m thinking it’s only the Sun. I see the cosmos as a beautiful system of checks and balances all for the good of humanity, but can’t seem to reconcile this Plutonian misuse of power. Your thoughts….
    Blessings,
    Aries Rising

    • “My question is – is there any planet that stops Pluto dead in his tracks or at least makes him slow down and take a second look? ”

      It’s a good question. I think all the planets might reason with Pluto, potentially.

      • The first thought that came to me was Neptune something in its nature to dissolve form and also in its aspect as the higher octave of love/ cosmic love.

      • Is there any power that stops Pluto in its tracks or makes it slow down? I would say look at the person’s pluto aspects to enus, neptune and saturn. Venus: power of love or love of power; neptune – compulsion to destroy or to rise above, and saturn: play by the rules or destroy to survive? Likewise, Pluto to mercury: obsession for trickery and pulling a con, ability to rationalize – or to perceive own’s own power? But truthfully, I have given only one person this power over me, and we each hold the other’s trust carefully in our palms. Or is this the great illusion- that it’s mutual? But what does this have to do with this gereation?

  4. ((((Hugs)))) I can totally relate, since this was the story of my life! I had step-siblings who did this all the time to me. My dad (step-dad) who raised me always told me they were jealous of me. Not that it made it easier. So when my dad died, all but one step-sibling wrote me out of there life. Blessing in disguise! Why, I don’t know, and my one sister I still talk to doesn’t understand it either.They taught me very well on how true deceitful people work.The people who did this to you, they don’t deserve your loyalties or respect,because they have not respected your loyalties. As an Energy Healer, I recommend getting a Black Tourmaline stone and where in your left pocket. I protects from negative people and psychic attacks.

  5. I think I get it & can relate on some level. I’ve been “diminished” most of my life, this much is true. I’ve had all sorts of people “hamstring” me in life & at work, in one case costing me my job. And I’m currently dealing with some poison darts being shot my way at work. I don’t know what I did, and I’m not even sure who I pissed off. All I know is, I just have to keep working the same as I have, if not harder. Thankfully, an opportunity has opened up that may get me out of there, through a source I never would have anticipated. So, there’s hope. There’s always hope. Once you’ve been beat down so many times, you know you can pretty much survive anything.

    • “Once you’ve been beat down so many times, you know you can pretty much survive anything.”

      Generally, I bet this is true.

      I don’t feel beat down though. I feel like a window opened. The truth is like that. When you done kidding yourself or arguing that it’s not so, and can’t be so, and come to accept that it is exactly what it is – bam. Freedom.

      This is along the same lines I’ve written about for years. “Stab me, I get your knife?”

      Except, I just didn’t know this truth was a broad as it is, for one. Secondly…well now I have to figure out what it means, and who I can tell, if anyone.

      That makes me think about something else…the knowledge that dies with the person who carries it. I’ve written about that too, I think. I’m certainly aware of it.

      But our generation…well, we’re just fools, is all. Living in a giant collaborative lie. 🙂

      • No, I get that you don’t feel beat down. Nor do I, at the moment. Just saying that, I’ve been beat down in the past & have managed to come this far. So, when people try to get at me now it’s kind of like, “what? Is that all you’ve got?” *tosses hair & walks away unscathed*

        Yes! I remember the “stab me, I get your knife!” And it’s so true. When someone tries to get you, they are giving you the very weapon they just tried to use against you.

        All the lies, though, that’s pure ego. We are living in an age ruled by ego. Have you ever seen the movie Revolver? I’m pretty sure I recommended it to you once. Best movie about the psychology of the ego, imho.

      • I think in some ways many adults never left that bully/bullied dynamic in high school…it just changed form. Instead of being outright mean with words and physical actions, they cut off your income (and ability to survive in their world) so you become marginalized. They stratify you off into some other neighborhood where you don’t have access to the same resources and have no choice but to take whatever demeaning position they offer so you can at least meet basic survival needs. In Mexico, water was free. When the IMF advised them to charge for water there was a riot because the poorest of the poor is who it hurt most. They did the same for transportation. They hit the areas where they KNEW the poor couldn’t do without. There is no choice but to be completely and utterly dependent on the system they set up. We were born into it so can’t imagine a different world…it’s like “too large” to reverse.

  6. I don’t know if I fully get this but… Do you mean accepting the fact that someone hurts you and just letting it go?

    I don’t think I’d be willing to forgive someone who takes pleasure in hurting me. Even when I’m upset I don’t go out of my way to hurt people. I expect the same in return and if not, I don’t want them around.

    I know people who have forgiven horrible betrayals and accept it but I just don’t think I have that capacity.

    • I can forgive…anything. This is my nature. Not that a person can regain my trust, necessarily.

      This is more about the lie so many of us believe. Our image is not harmed if our spouse cheats on us, for example.

      This person, so important in your life, does not hold you in high esteem.

      And that’s going to mean something.

      It’s easier to see, if you compare the situation to a couple when the spouses do hold each other in high esteem.

  7. I get it. In the twelfth house, it’s silent; veiled. The 12th is also the house of isolation, sanctuaries, the soul. With Pluto moving through here, the irony of that person not picking up the phone is symbolic of the transit it seems. Pluto is penetrating the veil. Our curtain can be made up of many things in the 12th. Pluto is uprooting complexes and the past. It will sever them, too. Not 4th house past, but the long 12th house past. It’s like facing the boogeyman at night and realizing its clothes stacked on a chair. Or knowing something to be instinctively true while the rest of world around you denies it to maintain control, or… Because they can’t face the truth. Some people don’t want to see it, much less admit to it.
    I’ve got an unaspected Sun in the 12th house.

    • One more thought: I think this transit makes one sensitive to undercurrents and power plays and struggles that are beneath the surface. Pluto digs up the “shit” and brings it to the surface. But in the 12th, where is the surface? What is dug up slowly becomes an awareness. You sit in it until Pluto crosses the ascendant, maybe. Or you meet it “out there” in the world of the 6th house and (cancer?). It has to go somewhere. I’m rambling, but I love picking it apart then putting the pieces together.

  8. Hi Elsa!
    This is an awesome post! I so totally get what you are writing about! I have experienced this heartbreaking situation and with Pluto excavating my 12th house I lost my children through the manipulation of others. My main mistake that Pluto has taught me is that I didn’t handle well certain hidden enemies and many situations. I didn’t speak up, confront trouble makers or have heart to heart conversations with my children. Just watched it all happen and it got so cruel that I had to walk away to save myself. I let myself be the family scapegoat and whipping post. Today I love and respect myself and will never again tolerate mistreatment of any kind. I carry the pain of children loss, but found myself. So, thank you Elsa for opening up this subject. You reached me!

    • Jan – I’m reading this and it’s as though I wrote it. I have Pluto transiting the 12th, am experiencing extreme isolation (some chosen) and have recently “lost one child through the manipulation of others” (he broke my heart with his cruelty) and suffer indifference from the other. I also feel that I could have handled certain situations and people better – but hindsight …. I also chose to walk away to keep from loosing myself and who I am. I chose to be who I am even if others can’t see me right now.
      To Elsa, reading this blog has helped me to understand and accept what is going on in my life right now. My ASC is at 26 Cap, so it will be a while before this is over, but now I feel I’m more prepared and can rely on my strength to help me through it.

      • Hi Renie!
        I am deeply sorry for your pain! Your Asc is 26* Cap and mine is 24* Cap! Do you have a Yod or a Grand Cross in your chart? I have a Moon Yod in the 12th house that is also on my Cardinal Grand Cross! So I do not expect my situation will change. I hope yours may heal. This happened to me in mid April 2014 when we had 2 cardinal crosses brought by Eclipses. How has this transformed you Renie? This pain has made me become the best person I have ever been! I lug the pain around and create beautiful works of art! Wonder if most really creative people are in tremendous pain? This situation for me, was one that I did not know how to handle so I just watched it happen! I was silent and didn’t speak up so no one respected my feelings that were so very deep. The situation was over whelming. I’m sending you much love and understanding of what has happened to you. Please find a way to heal my friend….Hugs

        • Jan, thank you for your kind words.
          I have a Scorpio Midheaven, so my transformation happened with my career almost to the day Pluto entered my 12th house. With Jupiter conjunct my MC, everything turned out well in that respect, I feel I chose the life I have now, even though it is isolating. My bad day was 12/26/14 – Mercury conj Pluto squ Uranus, Mars opp my natal 7th house Sat/Pluto conjunction. My son had the same Mercury/Pluto conjunct his MC. Kabooom!! The ruthlessness of Pluto was unmistakable. I tried to speak up and make things right, but was ruthlessly rebuffed unless I was willing to bend to their will (let them have power over me). I’m still overwhelmed by the whole situation, the thought of your children turning against you is almost unbearable. You mention your feelings not being respected – I feel nobody seems to care that I have feeling. Moreover, I can’t talk about this to anyone, nobody understands or cares. Other, more subtle things have occurred with other close relationships, making me feel very alone in the world at this time. So I keep going by accepting what I can’t change until the day comes when I can change them. Dear Jan, when I read your words my heart went out to you and I had to respond to let you know that I understand. We will continue to hold our children in our hearts; hopefully they will see us again for the loving parents we are. Blessings.

      • Hi Renie,
        Meant to get back to you earlier and this reply may be out of sequence, but I think you will receive it. Thank you for replying to my post. I just reread your last reply to me and I have some thoughts. You mentioned isolation. I recently read a wonderful post by a blogger who wrote about learning how to love ourselves and that it may bring isolation. When we stand up for the first time to abusive, disrespectful and unloving treatment and refuse to accept it, others don’t understand because we’ve taken it before and they turn away from us angrily. If we change, others must adapt to our change or isolate us with their absence. If we have seldom resonated with certain people we may have dumbed ourselves down in order to fit in and keep them in our life, thus forsaking love for ourselves! This takes much energy and shows our lack of love for ourself. When we learn to love ourselves, we can no longer accept any kind of abuse. I have learned to trust that Pluto removes people from our lives (permanently or temporarily) who challenge our self love. I do not know how the end of this story may play out for us suffering from people loss. But I do know that we can no longer, ever again accept abuse of any kind! Yes, we will keep those in our hearts forever because we love them unconditionally, but they must return this favor back to us if we are to sustain loving relationships with them.
        Much Love and Hugs

        • Jan, this is right on. I could have saved my relationship with my son by being conciliatory to his wife, if I thought that I had any blame in the issue. But I stayed true to myself and didn’t give away my power the way I might have in the past. My career change came about in a similar manner. This is all very Plutonian and Karmic. Secret Enemies appear without warning and try to do you in. But we must preserve our SELF, so we must let them go for now.
          Blessings

  9. “Once you understand, you can see all kinds of big things you can do when you’re small.”

    When I got sick from all the big chemicals, we built a tiny house. The tiny house isn’t ‘kosher’ in most places, so we learned how to ask for a place where what we were good at could shine in spite of our under-the-wire lifestyle. We learned to live a tiny life from a tiny house. “Once you understand, you can see all kinds of big things you can do when you’re small.”

    Moss has literally saved my life, a one-cell plant, the first one to leave the ocean and make it on dry land. To the Moss Nation we look pretty darn big in our tiny home. Every night, I offer the moss a drink of water. They say, “Thanks a million.” For all those creatures who make the moss in the forest floor their home, I am learning the legacy of a one-cell plant that’s been around for about 350 million years. We humans are baby beings still learning to give-and-take in a respectful way.

    I get the ‘meat’ of seeing big by being small; the moss and the moon are patient teachers.

  10. I went to a meeting once, of a group of people all interested in a particular subject. I got chatting to a woman there, and we got on well, and quickly ascertained we both had a great deal of interest and knowledge in the subject at hand. There was one man at the meeting that I had had previous dealings with, and I knew him to be a fraud, and a con man. Towards the end of the meeting, it was decided that we should form a society, and they called for position bearers. The man I knew to be a disreputable person volunteered himself for a role. The woman I was talking to urged me to take a position. I told her no, and thanks, but there was one person in the room that I didn’t want to associate with, and I left it at that. I never identified the fellow, and I never said anything else about him. Perhaps I should have. I never saw or heard form her again until a year later when she rang me, in tears, to say that this man had conned her. He made it his business to befriend her and her husband, and portrayed himself to be someone other than he was, with lie upon lie. She eventually found him out, confronted him, and banished him from their life. But she was also shocked, and deeply wounded by his betrayal. I felt bad for her. I knew him to be a rotter, and I steered clear of him. To warn her, I would have to deliberately set out to put this man down. In the end, he did it himself, but he also caused damage to someone else. I’ve always felt bad about it. Do you speak up? Or stay silent? The funny thing was, he knew I knew about him, and he proceeded to tell some outrageous lies about me to this woman, to ensure that she had no further contact with me. He was pretty worried that I might tell her what I knew!

  11. yes, I get this. I have pluto transiting my eighth house and I’ve been ‘spiritually’ abused, pluto is now exactly on my natal mercury in eighth house and exactly square my moon saturn vesta stellium in 12th house aries. On the new moon (two weeks ago) I cut ties with the one who was ‘helping’ (deeply harming and for many years)to one who is now healing me. (new moon conjunct uranus on my aries stellium gave profound insight) Yes, total plutonic abuse of power (like a magician….damn scary)and I think only pluto can stop pluto in his tracks – a clean, enlightned, tranformed pluto can crush or transform a maligned, abusive, power hungry pluto. I’m seeing it, living it, feeling it and recovering from it. I’m so glad I’m on the road to health and spiritual safety. Be careful, I trusted the wrong one for so long and it nearly killed me. I have a 12th house moon so I can be duped into martyr like sacrifice. it’s been so terribly sorrowful but there’s a way out with the right ones. A deep and honest journey into one’s faith and relationship with God, steadfast boundaries to prevent personal (spiritual) attack, prayers and a simple, good life are helping me. Thanks for this post Elsa, most needed, so many are suffering under the abuse of pluto’s power ruining people’s lives and repututions unecssarily just to keep power, that they are not entitled to.

  12. When Pluto entered my 12th house I was 10 yrs old. During this transit all my girlish dreams were killed, but I became stronger and a lot wiser. Wouldn’t have survived my later life without those lessons. Grateful for the experience.

  13. Pluto in Capricorn, in 12th . . thousands of people fleeing war are being imprisoned, their basic human rights abused and discriminated in mine and other european countries . . I know this is too far from your experience and it might be hard to understand in its fullness (it was for me untli I watched it happening right next to me) but talk about diminishing people . . I don’t know whether these people even have the chance to relish in any way about being ‘small’ . . is simply being alive enough when or if you can’t find hope? I’ll say no more or I’ll ramble . . thanks for sharing though, this is truly pluto – and perhaps a bit of that looming full moon in scorpio- stuff

  14. My life, and future, was completely destroyed by someone in a position of power so I am familiar with the dynamic. Sometimes the only real power is to lean into it. Can’t hurt someone with nothing to lose, ya know? I’m not a Christian but I think the story of Jesus is a profound one. They wanted so bad for him to break and instead he transcended. He was like “forgive them father for they know not what they do.” He accepted it too 🙂

  15. I have sun pluto conjunct midheaven. I think I understand what you’re saying elsa. I live with one foot inside of society’s circle and one foot out. You mentioned God. I don’t know where I would be without my knowledge and relationship with God. It really keeps life in perspective to know that there is a much much bigger picture than just our time here.

    Often when I pray I ask God to grace me with the ability to inspire and uplift others. Of course I don’t always live up to my own spiritual ambitions but I think it’s a really worthy goal.

  16. I understand this completely. I can’t go into details here. Such social phenomenons exist that normal human beings can’t (or refuse to) believe them – unless they are EXPERIENCING them.
    I know I am alone in this and, just as you said, I have to accept it.
    I have also thought of ‘the knowledge that dies with the person who carries it’ – but does it have to be this way? Maya Angelou said ”There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.”

    I have natal Pluto in the 12th house.

  17. Dear (((((Elsa)))))
    I can relate to all this and i wish you all the best
    I also have pluto transiting 12 house with natal pluto in 8 house….
    And now full moon in Scorpio is conjunct my Uranus which squares natal Mars on DSC.
    It’s hard.

  18. “pretty serious to harm a person when you’re in a position to do so, when it’s unwarranted. It’s like a double whammy. Not only do you not support them when you should, you do them damage.”
    That’s something I agree with, wholeheartedly. I’ve been at the receiving end of this, and I’ll never forget those, even if I say otherwise. People do much damage when they’re trying to help, though. Far better if they kept their mouth shut.

  19. I get exactly what you said Elsa. And I really needed confirmation I’m not crazy, so thanks. Some OPs have excellent points to make but may be missing the Pluto Cap aspect of this insight — the way we give people in power additional power, to further add to or detract from our status on an ongoing basis. Being a renegade in relationship to establishments is never easy. Period. I’m going through this now, as perhaps many others are, with all this activity in Aries w/ Uranus and the confusions of Neptune (gaslighting).

  20. With a Pluto transit to the 12th house, I have learned that we give people power over us by our silence. We don’t always know when someone is undermining us, but when we do know that they are, by speaking up it may empower us, but the important thing is HOW we speak up! We can do more harm to our selves by going off like a loose cannon. Plan it out before you speak if you are not sure how you should speak and what you will say that will be fair and put you in a respectable (Capricorn) light! Just my 2 cents…..
    Hope you are feeling well, Elsa!

  21. i try to live with grace regardless of the situations if find myself in. it helps.

    i lived through a lot of such situations over the course of my life. i found joy and delight regardless. although i’m dealing with a condition now that can apparently be a side effect of PTSD. so i definitely carry it with me. i wonder how many autoimmune disorders are that way- stress is treated by the body like an illness, and it tries to find something to attack….

  22. Rage, betrayal, revealing secrets are rampant. Everyone I know has been very painfully blown out of the water by someone.NPR’s article on Beyoncé shows video of her breaking out car windows with a baseball bat; says Beyoncé’s release “Formation” shows videos from childhood and Jay Z, heavy Southern gothic imagery, broken up with title cards that play on the Kübler-Ross model of grief — intuition, denial, anger, apathy, emptiness, accountability, reformation. Her fury hits home-stems from what feels like real heartbreak. The album casts Beyoncé as a scorned lover and opens with the line, “You can taste the dishonesty/It’s all over your breath/As you pass it off so cavalier…Are you cheating on me?” Ends with “All Night”: “With every tear came redemption. / My torturer became my remedy. / So we’re going to heal, we’re going to start again.”

    As for me, with some gut wrenching losses and betrayals, I’ve retreated to the silent depths to lick my wounds. I’m not coming out for a long time.

  23. Realizing my dead narcissistic mother was jealous of me helped me to recover some of my tattered self-esteem. I understand now her festering jealousy was why she had to deploy contempt in my direction whenever possible. I never wanted to admit to myself that she enjoyed inflicting pain on me but there is no doubt in my mind now she did.

  24. 6 Virgo is a house of conscious servant, axis 12 Pisces is a house of unconscious slave. The 12 is a busy house, the house of the rising sun, much happens there, 12 is the first house of Day, all things diurnal come to life, no time to focus on self and what is there, the Mind’s eye blinds in the light of that area. The Other is more important in 12 and we are unconscious slaves until we see things in a different light. We can be blinded by the light as well as the darkness. Wear your shades baybee!
    Check those aspects again, Pluto has not been unaspected since the mid 1940’s and remains so into the 2030’s.

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