Mars Square Mercury – Flare!

heated-leather-glovesm_BI don’t know exactly what happened today, or exactly when this started because I passed out, last night. I was just exhausted. So today, I didn’t feel good. I reeeeeeeally didn’t feel good and I couldn’t figure out why.

I try to figure things out because lupus is so weird. But I just don’t know what was going on, but I did know I’d better hang it up and get in bed. So I did that…and even broke out my heated (in the fingers) motorcycle gloves, put them on and turned them on high.

My hands weren’t cold, which used to be common. I just couldn’t really feel them, or the tops of my thighs, since yesterday. I don’t know. Could be caused by the bone lying on my spinal cord. I just don’t know. But I wore the gloves for ninety minutes and it did help my hands.

My husband came home, late. Twelve hour day at work. I fed him and we got in the bathtub, per our habit. I got out and was shocked when I saw myself in the mirror. Bright red lupus rash on my face.

“Look at this! I didn’t even go outside today.” I know not to ignore these pervasive sick feelings. I stayed home today, paying attention and trying to discern if what I felt in my arms was “weakness”. That would be a neck thing.

But then I remembered, I did walk to the mailbox to get the mail. So in that two minute period, this happened to my face. It’s phenomenal, really.

I’ll be all right. I just have to lay low until my antibodies chill out. And maybe put the gloves back on and wait.


Comments

Mars Square Mercury – Flare! — 26 Comments

  1. Elsa, thank you for all the work and devotion you put in over the years!
    I don’t know anything about Lupus, but I am really really worried for you. Could it be stress that you had this experience last night? I know this sounds like a long shot. But stress possibly can come from many disguised ways, say, stimulations of all kinds that are a little above the usual range that your body accustomed to, even in the form of overly happy, or overly sad, or overly excited, etc etc.. all those can disrupt body’s norm which is different for each individual, I think. I noticed there are tons of turbulent emotions among lots of people since last night and lingering to today. I am not sure what made it so, but if there is a thing called ‘collective consciousness’ then our body can sooner or later ‘feel’ it and be taxed by it, especially Pisces? So maybe before the chaos of collective conscousness coming, get a bit of relaxing music, or take a few times walks in the nearby nature, or play with pets, …. would ease up on the unconscious part of our existence in order to have enough reservoir to ‘skate’ through the unusual times. I am not sure whether it is just me who felt the ‘collective turbulence’ since last night till today, but if I am not the only one who felt it, once you feel much much better, can you please give us some insight on why this happened and what should we do before this kind of energy happen again? ( I was thinking of ‘white light bubble’ and grounding…. but I believe you will give us some practical advice. Thanks!

  2. Definitely a flare going around. I had a right kidney flare, which didn’t make any sense, because I’ve given up everything for Lent – caffeine, alcohol, and even most food. Nothing should have stressed my kidney, and yet I had a total flare starting two days ago. Yesterday I dug the chelated magnesium out of the car, took it, and had blessed relief from the pain, and suffered the diarrhea (what happens when using this off-label supplement at drug-level dose). Went around all afternoon thanking Mary for my health, and diarrhea be dammmed. GRIN So hang in there, Elsa. Your post helped me, because Venus rules the kidney, and it wasn’t doing anything in my chart, and I felt like “astrology doesn’t even work, damnit”.

    • Ha ha ha, thanks.

      It’s so strange. Because I have not needed those gloves that much since I bought the. The weather here is incredibly mild as compared to Colorado. So I look at them and I think I made a mistake buying them. They’re not exactly cheap.

      Then something like yesterday happens and all the sudden those gloves seem very lightweight. Seriously. Like they are on HIGH and I can barely feel the heat. And realizing this, I wonder if I am going to pull my hand out and find it all red and scalded. And as soon as I think that, I don’t care if it is red and scalded, I do not want to remove the glove.

      It’s also so hard to describe these sensations. I think it might be my neck…my spinal cord is impinged on and sending weirdo sensations.

      The oddest feeling is the tops of my thighs. The blankets feel insane, like my skin can’t feel them, but I can see they’re there.

      I am going to a neurosurgeon next week. We’ll see. 🙂

  3. Oh, Honey! You know all hearts and thoughts are with you! I’m picturing you immersed in healing, sparkling white light, whisking away the ills and leaving lots of space in your body for revitalization. It’s lucky you’re so plucky!

    • Thanks. Unfortunately, it passed. Have to stay home today…in bed with a kindle. Aaargh. It’s just so shocking. This hasn’t happened in awhile. Like maybe a year.

      Someone may be coming over today about the roof. They’re welcome to look at it, but if they knock on the door, I’m not going to budge. It’s like being half-dead. I do not exaggerate.

  4. I have something new…symptom OR I’ve just never noticed it before (which is very likely). My husband is here, tracking. It’s my hands.

    The hands link to my neck. I have to google..and see a doc!

  5. And I know what it’s like to be a dog now. They lie around all day too. Really, it was like four dogs lying around. Except I typed my ass off and I’ll tell you why.

    I feel like I’m dying and it’s liberating. So many things are of no consequence when you’re this sick. I’ve nearly forgotten what freedom feels like. 🙂

  6. ((((Elsa)))) I hope this will subside quickly so you can feel good again — and hold on to that new feeling of freedom as the gift of this episode. Meanwhile, let your doggies cuddle up and keep you warm — make it a three dog night!

  7. Better today, I hope it stays this way. Like I feel 80%.

    If it holds I am going to go to the store…I need cabbage and milk! But mostly, I just want to get out of here for awhile.

  8. Hang in there, Elsa. I have had stuff like this happening to me too for the past year. Unfortunately I know that half-dead feeling. You’re not alone. And I appreciate your views on this/transcending it. Inspiring.

    • Thanks! I see a PA at the neuro next week. Deal with tumors the week following, but don’t expect alarm from it.

      I am also supposed to start (back) PT. I am hoping neuro gets me out of it. I think it makes things worse.

      I’ve said it before…this is going to take a year to play out, I’m sure. Saturn transit.

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