I’ve had a mighty struggle over the last year or so. It’s been so protracted, I’d be stupid not to ask myself what my big problem is. Why do I hang on?
I think it’s because I’ve got Jupiter strong in my chart. It’s very hard for me to give up hope. I feel jealous of people who can assess a situation, see it’s a waste of time and drop it like a hot potato.
I don’t necessarily think that people like that are smarter than I am or that they are right all the time. It’s just that right now, I’m sitting here with my empty bag and wondering if I ought to edit myself in some way. Is it possible for me not to repeat something like this in the future?
“They’re not going to change,” my husband explained last night. “They’ve been that way since the 1700’s; they’re not going to change one iota…”
If he’s right and I believe he is, I have spent a tremendous amount of energy on what was a lost cause from the get go. Worse, even after I’m told what is real and can pretty much accept it as real, I’m still standing here like the kid in “Eight Men Out”.
I have no idea what to do from today, going forward. I thought I’d post this and see if anyone recognizes themselves in any of this.