Living With A Grand Cross

Living with a Grand CrossI have a chart that causes astrologers to say “I’m sorry,” or as one reacted when my sister Elsa showed my chart to her, “How does she live with this?” I have plenty of aspects but what stands out to most astrologers is my Grand Cross in mutable signs. They wonder how I deal, what my life has been like and what sort of a train wreck I am! I’m not a train wreck and in fact I have a way of looking at life and at oppositions in particular that works for me and works for my chart! I’m happier than most people think and I’m very experienced in some tough things as people would expect. I’ve also been blessed where others are not so lucky and it’s all due to my Grand Cross and the action in my chart.

Opposition means balance. When one has a Grand Cross in their natal chart it means that a person is going to learn about balance and learn in a very deep way! When people of opposite signs learn to tolerate each other it is a high form of love and when a person learns to live with opposites in their chart at all times one learns to be open and have love for everyone and themselves as well. It’s interesting I worked and studied so hard to be a dancer when you think of the fact that dance is the hardest sport on the human body according to a Harvard study. Yes, one is a perfectionist when they study dance for they are looking in the mirror at all times seeing their mistakes and flaws mirrored back at them in living color. A Grand cross in your natal chart is much like this because any time you go too far to to one side or the edge you will see the mistake right away and you must correct it to go on! It’s all about balance, as dance is, so is the Grand Cross in your natal chart.

I have been forced to live a life of balance and if I ever go too far to one side of the cross, for example, become too emotional or too earthy, I’m going to suffer for it and I’m going to have to correct it! Rarely do you get in any trouble with a Grand Cross in your chart because life corrects you before things get too messy! If I have my Sun in Pisces I had better think of what a Virgo would say too because I have the opposition in my chart and the Virgo planet is going to have its say whether I like it or not. If I get too Sagittarius I can count on my planet in Gemini yelling out in one form or the other for attention until I hear it loud and clear and consider its lessons! Oh yes, it is a very balanced life and one is reminded of the saying “Everything in moderation.” If I act out I’m going to get caught and I’m never going to get away with anything, but on the other hand no one seems to get away with causing me problems either! It is a system of checks and balances where I see others “get their dues” when they “do me wrong” while I see those that do the right thing in my life rewarded greatly for it! I used to think it was all out of my hands until I mastered my chart enough to own some of the energy inside myself.

When I was younger and had a problem with a Scorpio, for example, a Taurus that was very strong would appear and befriend me and help me along through my problem with the Scorpio! I had to learn to do these things for myself but to this day I will have the same experience. If one sign gives me too many problems the universe sends me a person in my life that can advise me on how to handle the problem I have with a person of that sign hassling me! These people have appeared in the guise of lawyers, doctors and Indian chiefs. These helpmates have been of every sign but always a sign that is opposite the one I am having problems with and I end up learning how to “win the day” from the person that appears of the opposite sign.

I now have learned to act on the opposite side of my chart when having problems with someone or something and no longer do I find a person filling this role, or less and less a person has needed to appear. It is as if I’ve had angels that have come into my life to help me get out of trouble and they come in the sign that I have neglected to think like or about…. Since I have internalized some of this ability to be that balance myself I have needed fewer angels but they still appear when the issue is too much for me or something I have no experience with.

Accidents have occurred. If I am too Sagittarius I can expect an accident of some sort to befall me but it will be just enough to teach me the lesson of the Gemini inside of me and there will be balance restored. Being frightened of oppositions is not something I have ever suffered from for I can count on this action to take place in my life and in my chart so I know I will land on my feet. However I know not to push the gambler in my Sagittarius or go to far into my head when the Gemini is pulling on me too hard! If I am too Pisces I can count on a Virgo lesson to pop up that is just strong enough to balance my thinking out and set my life straight!

To the outsider it may look like my life has been tough but I have had the very best life has to offer and the very worse as I learned to balance my life according to my chart’s demands. I’ve had it horrible and the next day I’ve been fine. I’ve landed on my feet more times than my cat has in his life! I have more than nine lives because my chart will correct itself and therefore, myself before I know it. This has given me great faith and a deep knowledge of myself that comes from studying everything one can study with a Grand Cross.

I’ve had psychotherapy for twelve years to get to know myself and I’ve studied tarot, astrology, numerology and other practices. I’ve had to do all this to understand myself and make sense of life with the Grand Cross living in my chart! There are also “ways out” that are key aspects that help me escape the Grand Cross if I need to and transcend everything. For example, I’ve Sun trine Neptune and if I go there it all can disappear for I am peaceful, sure of my beliefs and able to relax. Still I will have to return to the lessons of the Grand Cross whose lessons are very powerful.

The Grand Cross teaches us to allow for another’s ideas and thoughts. It shows us that other’s ideas and opinions may be valid for something we need to know in life. The Grand Cross in your natal chart teaches you that people are very important in your life and that you should honor them for who they are. Most of all the Grand Cross teaches one that life is large and open and we can all do just about whatever we want to do so long as we have thought it out, felt it out and most all, stay open! When there is a Grand Cross in the sky it is our opportunity to find our balance again and right our wrongs.

Most of all when we meet someone of the opposite sign of our own we would do well to remember that they may have something to teach us that will better our lives!

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Living With A Grand Cross — 81 Comments

  1. I can relate. them them all you adhere to william of orange, “to persevere with out the need of hope, to strive with out the expectation of sucess”

  2. A beautifully written, eloquent post (seems to run in the family! 😉 This helps to flesh out why I felt so balanced during the Aries stellium. I don’t have a Grand Cross, but I’m a Libra Sun with a stellium in Libra and I found all of those oppositions suited my Libran’s need for balance. Maybe that’s just how I used the energy, I don’t know. I know things weren’t perfect for me during that month, but somehow, all of those oppositions served me well and I loved the oppositional energy. Your post has made me think about how I can use the energy of this Grand Cross and it underscores everything I’ve been thinking about lately. Thanks for that. 😉

  3. I have a lot of oppositions in my chart due my Gemini and Sagittarius planets and I can totally relate! If I become too big pictured like a Sag, I suddenly become more Gemini, Lol.

    -Nice writing-

  4. Excellent post, Annalisa! Thank YOU!

    I don’t have a grand cross (at least I don’t think I do)- but, I have had to learn to manage some oppositions… Namely- Pluto. It opposes Mercury/Mars/Chiron and by a wide orb- Jupiter/IC.

    The challenge of this opposition has been to find the best way to channel all that intense energy. To heal or to kill… 😉

  5. I have a grand cross too, in fixed signs, and I agree/identify with a lot of what you said here. I think I’m capable of anything because I know I’m capable of anything. The past several years of my life have been difficult, and the next several will be difficult too, maybe even more difficult, but I always managed to pull myself out of it (nearly all on my own), and I’ll do the same this time. I’ve had plenty of chances to fall apart, land myself in a truly bad situation, and even end up dead, but somehow I always pulled through. I suppose it helps that the grand cross links up with a mystic rectangle at a couple points. It’s hard to hit a dead-end, because there’s always a way out, if not several.

    It hasn’t always been this easy, but as I’ve matured (only 18/19 years old here), and have had astrology assisting me, it’s become easier to work with my chart instead of having it steamroll me.

    • That’s my story, fixed grand cross in my natal chart. I was told years ago, I had a grand cross which meant I was capable of greatness, for good or evil (same as everyone with a grand cross). In my case, I know that once I’m fixated on something, I am relentless. I will pursue my goals. It doesn’t apply to people though. If someone tries to block me, stop me getting my goal, I will step around them and continue to push forward. I’ll just disengage from them. This might be the Aquarian in me… It’s nice to meet a community of other Grand crossers though. It makes you realise that there are people out there that might understand how you might see the world.

  6. Great post, as a person with a fixed grand cross I appreciate your insightful piece. One year ago a close friend gave me a Michel Parks print that speaks volumes on balance and harmony. Your observations about oppositions and balancing is a must for a Grand Cross chart. I am wondering if you have a Grand Trine also. I do and Saturn is the anchor for both.

  7. This was a treat for me to read. Thank you. I have a T-square but can’t remember what type or what it’s in etc. Have it written somewhere. Anyway, my life has been very similar to yours. And it’s just a breath of fresh air to read someone who understands and experiences life the same way.

  8. very well written! No grand cross here but I do have a mystic rectangle, which balances out a couple of intense oppositions in my chart.

    I have found your writing about Grand Crosses natally as very helpful in understanding how to benefit from the current grand cross in the sky. I have taken alot from your writing and interpreting it through where the current grand cross falls in my chart.

    Very constructive blog, Annalisa! Thanks!

  9. I’m looking at my chart with its many and varied oppostitions and I see a cross with 2°27′ Scorpio Neptune, 3°39′ Leo Uranus, 5°26′ Aquarius MC and 29°42′ Aries ASC. Is this classed as a grand cross even though ASC is out of sign and MC is included as opposed to an actual planet?

  10. Thanks for such a considered and thorough post Annalisa, this makes a lot of sense. I was reading Barbara Handclow yesterday and she said ‘Grand Crosses are my favourite configuration because they always get the job done’.
    😀

  11. Thanks for reading everyone! I’m happy to see that people see their oppositions as opportunities instead of road blocks! There is a nice balance there that makes us wise and life wonderful as soon as we stop fighting the lessons that the aspect brings! Yes, I do have a grand trine in fire but the grand cross is involved. There is, indeed, always somewhere to go and the knowledge of that helps us in life tremendously!

    • I have a grand mutable cross. And yes when challenges have come, a helper arrives to make the way easier. Your post really resonated. Thank you

  12. Thanks for this. I’ve been curious about what it must feel like to have those conflictions in a chart.

    On saturday I’m attending the 1 year birthday of a child who was born during last summer’s cardinal cross dance. June 20th. He’s been on my mind!

  13. Tima, I’m sure your daughter will have a special life with a grand cross! It is NOT as negative as some may think and it can balance you in amazing ways! One stays on track and again, can live in moderation very well which is the best way to live. Knowing the other side of things is a gift, not a curse!
    Thank you for reading!

  14. i like my oppositions and squares! now that i’ve had some practice growing into them…
    i only have a grand cross if you give the moon an 8 degree orb, but the t square’s pretty tight, and teaches me a lot.
    it involves my chart ruler, and fixed signs. can be really darn good at pulling me out of ruts if i get the energy swirling…

  15. Thank you so much for taking the time to write this and share it with us. I found this article after googling “Living with a Grand Square”. My daughter, who is only 19mos old, has a Grand Square and it has made me very concerned. I know a young man in his 30’s who also has one and his positive outlook is similar to yours. It is comforting to me to read your words. It give me hopes that my sweet baby girl isn’t doomed for some horrible life of heartbreak and sorrow. Thanks again!

  16. Annalisa, I wanted to thank you for this post. This helps me see oppositions in a more constructive light. Ok, so while integration is key when it comes to dealing with squares, balance is indispensable when dealing with oppositions. Now I see how I can deal with the two oppositions in my chart. Ok with Moon in Sagittarius (9th) opposite Jupiter in Gemini (3rd), I have to balance the emotional with the philosophical and the big picture with the little details. For Neptune in Capricorn (10th) opposite Chiron in Cancer (4th), I have to balance the ideal with the healing process, and the outer world with the inner world.

  17. I’ve caught a few of your writings, Annalisa, and they are always beautifully written, profound and insightful.
    Have a Grand Cross & Kite Formation (hinged on a Pluto/Jupiter axis) coming up in my 2013 Solar Return. There’s also a mystic rectangle in this cardinal configuration, so looking for clues.
    Your suggestions of keeping balance makes perfect sense! 🙂
    Thank You!!

  18. Annalisa, I am a mutable grand cross, with sun in Pisces.
    I know what you’re talking when you speak about having a grand cross; sometimes seems a neverending bad story …and sometimes a special thing, a blessing… (!!!). Is an eternal fight.We must improve every day or …we die.
    God help you and all Grand crosses.
    (Excuse-me about my bad english, I am not english)

    • I have Sun in Pisces, Pluto in Virgo, Mars in Gemini, Jupiter in Sagitarius. Also a yod sat nep with Mars as receptor. Life is tough but I consider myself a happy person.

  19. Well written, I felt relieved reading this, my life at 62, I am on a hard conjunction Pluto transit `11 degree riding on my Cap sun 12 degree, and it gets worse LOL!!! I am glad I can laugh….Oh yes I have a grand cross and study astrology for years now…this hit is hard looking deep inside AGAIN!! But my life has not been all bad, but, a degree of concern deep …..my security has been shaken….your blog reeled me back in….TY

  20. Oh my! I resonate very much with every paragraph. The four quadrants of my chart for a very tight (less than 2 degrees apart) grand mutable cross in very late degrees of each sign. My Sag MC is dead on the Galactic Center. I, too, have had similar experiences with checks and balances in my life. I, too, was a ballet dancer for 7 years, also a horse rider specializing in dressage and a home school mom; all of which demanded tremendous balance of various kinds. I find it very interesting and a Spiritual blessing that I happened upon this article two days before the April 2014 Virgo full moon that hits my AC/DC axis to the exact degree! Annalisa, you are yet another Angel sent to me before I knew I needed it.

  21. Fixed grand cross of 1999 here…

    I have mars in Scorpio, Jupiter in Taurus, Neptune in Aquarius and Mercury in Leo…

    Not to mention my t-square with Moon conjunct North Node square saturn and opposite uranus…

    My chart is VERY crazy. its only been a year i’ve been acquainted with astrology but i’ve begun to learn alot..

    its frightening for me…

  22. Learning and being open is the key to balance and it is not easy to maintain under trauma conditions. I have been on a spiritual path probably since birth but it kicked into high gear at 48, 10 years ago. I always wondered why so many negative events impacted me so early. After living through a call which for a long time appeared as a spiritual double cross that destroyed everything, material and mind. It took many years of recovery and getting a Psychology degree did not reveal the real answer. I discovered the answer on my natal chart just this week. Boy I wish the Sun sign newspaper propaganda did not create blindness but for decades I had a low opinion of astrology because of the newspapers. I see in my natal I have two fixed grand crosses, centered around Pluto – Solar Fire says Roseta too. Through the process, I see my spiritual trauma as a double cross but it is healing to see it as a learning experience that lead me to Astrology.

  23. Wow, its great to hear from someone else who has a Mutable Grand Cross! My moon is Gemini, mars Virgo, Saturn Pisces and Venus/jupiter in Sagittarius. I feel like I’m constantly being pulled in all directions and then forced to look back in upon myself. I can really relate to what you were saying, I’ve also felt like the whole world was on my shoulders almost to breaking point but the next day I’m perfectly fine, strong even. I am my own worst enemy in a lot of ways but always independent and detatched. In other ways I could easily blend and get along with most social groups if I chose to, if I ignored the social anxiety that comes with being so self conscious. Thank you for your post

  24. The last two posts really threw me for a loop, as I can totally relate to both. I have been saying for the last 50 years, what the hell is wrong with me? But a few days ago I printed out my natal chart, which I have done before in the past with only a minor curiosity. This time however, I saw a square pattern with my planets and knew, deeply to my very core- that I found an answer. It took me this long to get here- What a crazy path to the truth! I dont know if its fixed, cardinal, mutable or what, but I am about to find out! THANK YOU all for your posts!

  25. I have 2 Fixed Grand Crosses (Sun, Saturn, Mars, and Jupiter/Pluto conjunct). I have lived through several deaths of people close to me. I survived triple negative breast cancer. I have lots of health problems. I’ve never kept a job for more than a year in my life. I’ve been married 4 times, widowed twice, divorced twice, and my mother married my first ex-husband! My last parent died when I was 59, and my inheritance was given away to a ‘relative’ who came out of the woodwork to claim it. So, yeah, living under 2 Grand Crosses can be challenging!

  26. Another Grand Crosser here, fixed, tight and on the angles! Born at exactly a full moon: Sun (conjunct Mars) Scorp 1st, Moon Taurus 7th, Uranus Leo 10th and Chiron Aqua 4th, all (except Mars) within 1°. Not one single positive aspect to this Cross. First off I was quite intensely abused my entire childhood (3-14), have been on my own since age of 15 and have had painful anxiety my whole life, like one big tightfisted knot. It has not been easy. Having an exact sq between Venus Libra and Saturn Cap doesn’t help much either. I’m a fighter when I need to be, and a survivor. It gets easier as one gets older, perfecting the balancing act! Thanks for the very positive and uplifting post with a refreshing perspective 🙂

  27. Thank you, thank you, thank you !! I have cardinal grand cross.It’s been a struggle realy, talking actions all the time, going from one extreme to another. Im realy thankful for your insights, it made me change my perspective on things. And thats why i love astrology, there isnt anyone to blame realy, its all written, you just have to play it out the best that you can.

  28. Awesome read!!! I have a Cardinal grand cross in my Chart, and yes I agree it’s about being taught balance in things… lol

    Cheers – Shane

  29. Thank you so much for this post. It’s the first time I’ve heard anyone describe the give-and-take the universe has with me. I have a fixed grand cross on my angles, and life has definitely been interesting (that detachment you’re talking about, there!). Almost like I have made a deal, and I find out very quickly if I’m not progressing with my end of the bargain. I’ve found this cross makes me very aware of when things are out of synch, as if I’m fine-tuned to why I should be taking path A and not path B. I don’t get much buffer for taking the easy way out for long, or for neglecting a responsibility, or even over-focusing in one area of life. I’m very aware of what needs to come next and even if I’m clueless, my chart puts it in front of me. It feels like a computer-adaptive test — I can tell where things are headed by what comes next. I’m not religious but this quote from apparently Jesus sums it up well: “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.” I’m not sure if only a few find it — I’d love to hear from more grand cross people. xx

  30. Over time it’s gotten more obvious than just going down paths, it’s like hearing a game show buzzer after every decision: a bell for correct and that horn for fail. Does this ring a bell for anyone? 🙂

  31. Another grand cross here! Over time I’ve learned to go with the flow, notice everything and accept it all. Empathy, compassion and listening are the most useful skills on earth. Loving kindness and forgiveness are the way to go. Don’t force, struggle or push!! Basically life will have its way with you, just play along with it and above all trust in a higher order of things!!!

  32. A. Podvodnyj states that it is better to treat the Grand Cross as a balance of oppositions, not concentrating efforts on one particular planet or horoscope house as a specific objective, but carefully tracing a rhythm of destiny, like balancing on the crest of a wave. People with a Grand Cross in the natal horoscope have protection, but too high to conjecture a direct attribution.

  33. I have a Grand cross, i didnt have my real father, and my mother was angry at me for it, I did have a stepfather that molested me. I had my first child at 19 @ 4 months his father was killed, but through it all I have scars yes, but I still decided to be a good person , and im also learning how to live a balanced life, happy or sad.

  34. I was raised by narcissists. My first husband was a sociopath. I worked in finance through three financial crises and faced harassment and discrimination throughout. My first pet
    was born immune-compromised and requires special protocols to live a normal life. I fell in love with a minor. I was hit by a double-decker bus while crossing the steeet and lived in a crack den in my 20s. I was incapacitated by an autoimmune disorder for seven years in my 30s. On the other hand, life is a blessing pure and simple and under an apparent divine dispensation what hasn’t killed me has for sure made me stronger. Through hard work and pure faith I have thrived.

  35. Thank you for that post. It was much needed. I have a cardinal square in my natal chart and reading articles online of what it means seem so negative. There are a lot of oppositions in my chart, in fact I call myself a walking contradiction because I feel pulled in so many directions. But time and time again, I’m always corrected somehow and with time, I am learning how to juggle the various contradictions within me. It’s nice to see a post that puts it positively as it is a positive and it can be challenging but, it gives you perspective and allows for a lot of growth. I’m glad I found your post

  36. What an enlightening post. I’m a fixed cross, squarely on the nodes and axes to boot. I’d always felt balance was self-reinforcing but after mulling the ideas here and reflecting on my experiences I’ve realized how much trouble I’d avoid if I were better balanced. I feel like a different quadrant and its corresponding element has been emphasized in each decade of my life.

    In my aughts (Scorpio IC) I was very emotionally tied to my family. my parents and the nuns at my catholic school were my heroes and I loved my siblings, but the other areas of my life I was a little loopy, a little lost. In my teens (Aquarius descendant) I was a little flighty and social. I became boy crazy and met my soulmate, stopped talking to my dad and struggled with school on and off. In my twenties (taurus on the MC) I became practical and earthy and very conscious of reputation and worldly success. after a few stumbles I went to the very top of my profession but dated Mr Wrong, lost my soul and all but lost contact with my family. In the last decade I have been really fiery and enterprising and self absorbed (Leo on the ascendant). I quit or was fired several times, romantic missteps again and again, went through tumultuous reversals in my relationship w my family. I went from spacey to ditzy to stressed to zealot from decade to decade. That’s what it looks like from this refined perspective at this point in my life when it’s all finally making sense.

    There’s been a workable balance or I feel I wouldn’t have survived, like how friendships were key in my 00s, internships and studies in my teens, my extended family and education in my 20s, and my mother and social life and professional interests in my 30s. As if I’ve been picking up mechanisms to smooth things out. But how much time it’s taken and how unconscious I’ve been of what helped or hurt. And the close shaves I’ve had with serious trouble in my life. The deaths and suicides and broken families among my friends and family, the darkness of my profession and isolated cults I’ve joined, the broken hearts I’ve suffered. Also the serious health challenges I’ve faced. Seizures and fainting, chronic conditions, mood and energy disorders. Boy it’s been a journey.

    I’m thankful for the get-up-and-go the cross has given me. I’ve had Relentless momentum even when nothing makes sense. It’s all been a lot of trouble but I’ve never stopped getting up in the morning and trying my best. Now that I know what feels right in the different quadrants of my life I have a picture of what a rough equilibrium might look like. What I wouldn’t give to be with the right guy, have a sustainable work situation, enjoy every moment and accept my family for who they are. Or to even come close: to have a soulmate in my sights, have kindred colleagues and be in the upswing career-wise, make a little time for my higher Self every day and be at peace with my relatives and at home.

    What I wouldn’t give!

    • I’d recommend using Dr Bach flower essences and California FES flower essences.
      3 flowers you may need are:
      Bleeding heart
      Walnut
      Star of Bethlehem
      Of course I don’t have you in front of me to test you with my pendulum but reading what you have placed I also recommend using yarrow or yarrow environmental solution aka YES from fes flowers.

      Also I do believe you when you say it has been a journey. It’s always a journey. But what a journey with a grand fixed cross!!
      Anything you may need about flower therapy ask with confidence and I’ll do my best to help you to the full extent of the knowledge The One has shared with me.

      • I picked up the Walnut and think I have the others lying around. I’m entering a new life and I feel balance is available to me now but am excited and nervous all the same.

        • Well, if you feel excited and nervous then Chamomile and impatiens could be useful. Others could be California Valerian and Star of Bethlehem.
          Be well.

  37. Annalisa, thank you for your insightful and authentic voice, and for starting the thread here. I too have a fixed Grand Cross on the nodes and angles, and find your observations validating and helpful. Always being the one who gets caught/corrected at the slightest misstep has puzzled me all my life but makes sense in the context you provide. The intrinsic balance of the Cross is centering and protective, which I’d never realized. It’s good to be among others doing their best to craft powerfully meaningful lives from Grand Cross energies.

  38. Thank you for your post. I have a Mutable Angled Grand Cross, which involves Moon/Jupiter (Retrograde)/Uranus (Retrograde)/Venus of which my only saving grace is that its not at all tight. But I do understand about the universe sending people to act as guides. As an adult I don’t get it all that much now; but as a child I used to get advice from other people all the time, just happens to when I’m having a particular problem.
    I thought I was just plain weird, and the only person it ever happened to, guess not thankfully. You’ve only reaffirmed my thoughts that I just have keep one foot in one thing and one foot in the other to keep going.
    Thank you again.

  39. I have a Grand fixed cross. Also have 2 Kites and the Envelope which encompasses the Mystic rectangle.
    Also thanks to all of this I have experienced the most important experience of one person’s life:
    All is an illusion. All is emptiness.
    In the surface you experience the ego and all of its stupidity. But deep inside of your very self you experience the bliss and power of the eternal life. The peace of not needing anything. Just being present in this moment.
    How true is master OSHO. How misunderstood he was.
    Only after having experienced the bliss of the void I have no more fear to death.
    I have not to tell you about how hard life is for one person bearing the grand fixed cross. You the grand fixed cross bearers already know it.
    But what I do have to tell you is to enjoy life as it is at the best you can.
    We reincarnate. Is up to you not continuing with that cycle.

    • I also have a fixed grand cross, involving Sun and Moon, on the angles and all 4 plants within 1° with no easy aspects conjoined. Learning about what you speak of now. It’s the same for everyone on earth though, those teachings. My biggest obstacle is anxiety, but working on it. Thanks for your post.

      • Flower essences are of great help for anxiety. It would be irresponsible to recommend an specific set without knowing the your case. However since you are already working on it I wish nothing but the very best for you. Also as you say it is the same for anyone on earth but once you have experienced it you can’t be the same. Everything changes.
        You can see how everything moves and how things are occult for the naked eye, also gifts and talents grow stronger for the benefit of the ones you enter in contact with.
        I feel blessed for all the suffering and limitations I have experienced in this life. What wonderful teachers they have been.

        • Oriana and Joe, how true and well put your comments are. One of the more “occult” realizations I’ve had about the cross is that for those who bear the configuration it’s as if our souls are crystalline and the spiritual laws are more powerfully felt: they order our lives in a stronger grip. So while the laws hold true for everyone they fit us like a glove. The golden rule, the grace that comes with forgiveness and repentance, the truth of everlasting life (reincarnation, the immortality of the soul), the sacred nature of words, all these and the parables in the scripture and more and especially the glory of love. They overpower anything worldly we encounter. We live in a magical realm as if seen by a third eye or felt by astral body and only the unseen is real or experienced.

          • We move through our lives like a cyclone of increasing size, ordering and remaking everything in our maker’s image and according to that nature.

  40. Thanks for this.
    I have a Grand cross (fixed and cardinal), Scorpio and Capricorn stellium and 8th house sun.
    My first email password in 1998 was “balance”. Go figure. My journey has just begun in my early 30’s.

  41. Fixed Grand Cross, here, and I just found out about it. I loved the article and all the comments. I have always sought balance, my husband says, “Is there a quota?” Yes, there is! I’m glad to hear others feel they are on a short leash. I have sun 2 degrees Gemini conjunct Mercury, so one arm of the cross is mutable. When I decide to do something, I do it no matter what, and this can be good or bad. Sometimes I don’t know when to stop. Life has gotten better with time, and prayer and radical holistic health practices have helped. Lots of free time and down time. Also, I need to stay positive, the negative can really bring me down, fast.
    I feel that I can solve almost every problem, because I’ve had so much experience! Trying to learn all I can, so thanks, all.

    • About radical health practices… I have taken self-care to its ultimate end point, after twenty years of do-or-die focus left me run down. At this point I have practical solutions to nearly any health issue. So in a way “taking up my cross” led me to take up another cross in healing as a sort of counterbalance — healing both myself and others. I feel this is another instance of the grand cross get-it-done perseverance. It’s another instance also of the protection available to us: if I hadn’t sought self-care I certainly would have died prematurely as some in my family have. The angels reached out and led me to still waters, green pastures. So after a lifetime of neglect at the hands of my parents and then wearing myself down, I am in better health than I have ever known.

      How is that for protection?

  42. Tears forming. I have a mutable Grand cross too. This is the best and most informative post I’ve discovered. I am now thinking about the angels the universe has sent me. I’ve been through a lot of ups and downs compared to most people I’ve met and yet I feel that these struggles were just natural forces that I accepted and understood. I almost feel like this post seems like future me. I appreciate the time and your openness to help others like me with your experiences.

  43. I desperately have been trying to figure mine out. I am a little confused and really could use the guidance. I am exhausted from battling with it all. Please help!

    • I know the angst. Here are some tips: an easier aspect pattern within your chart can give you a kind of “time out” from the challenge of the cross. Say if you have a triangle or a cradle or even a yod connected to one of the points of the cross, that aspect pattern can lend support or even a place of rest and refuge. For example I have a Star of David connected to my fixed cross and that grants guidance that is always available.

      Second, look to what modality the cross is in; mutable crosses make it easier to adapt to the challenges that occur as you “surf” each hard angle over time. For example the square in Gemini would naturally find it easier to play the angles since juggling is a talent of that sign. In contrast, my experience with a fixed cross is that it’s quite flummoxing to shift gears when the cross forces an adjustment. Say if a relationship requires surrender and patience, my Venus in Aquarius makes it hard for me to resist “forcing” things into place through mind-control (ha!) rather than shifting to, say, my Jupiter in Taurus. It’s as if a wholesale transformation has to occur rather than just shifting my focus.

      As mentioned above, become an expert in self-care. You control your chart, not the other way around. The inner spark that makes you, you, is divine and has entirely free will, including that over the stars. So provide yourself extra mothering or fathering, rest and nourishment, and just try to laugh at it all once in awhile. Harder said than done but truly a valuable skill.

  44. As a fixed cross these days it’s been so hard to breathe that I can’t get out of bed. Thinking back on my relationship challenges it almost seems impossible that I’ll ever be in a good relationship. In my 20s I was so guarded and couldn’t connect with anyone. It was long distance, non-committal, unconsummated, or drugged up and on-and-off. In my 30s it was disastrous: home wrecking (of live-in relationships, not of marriages), car wrecks and adulterous. In my 40s it’s been the most painful of all. The very thing that destroyed my childhood: lying, cheating and stealing. I had a miscarriage during a fling with a pathological liar, the shadiest person I’ve ever met; a fling with someone who’d cheated in his previous marriage ended in betrayal with him trysting and covering it up; a one-night stand from several years ago seems like he wants to get together now that I’m completely damaged and still emotionally bonded to the liar.

    It’s like life knows how to show me the maximum pain possible. The things I absolutely cannot abide show up on my doorstep. Distance, disaster, destruction. I can’t breathe.

  45. The adultery was just an unsolicited kiss from a married man. I’m not a cheater. But why I’m surrounded by liars and cheats right now just breaks my heart.

  46. It’s like the things I want – intimacy, or guidance, or roots – come with lessons that are walking on coal. I pray for something, and the highest price is exacted from me. I know I’m being asked to draw upon faith to follow through. I have been through this brutal rodeo time and again. Yet it doesn’t stop from grinding me to dust and rubbing my nose in ashes. Does anyone know what I mean?

  47. It sounds like you have been through a lot of terrible stuff. I have a fixed grand cross, late-degree, except one corner in early Gemini. Not nearly the same experience as you, like an earlier post said, look to easier aspects in your chart. I also had a miscarriage in my 30’s. My health and infertility have been the hardest part, but in my 60’s I seem to be healthier than ever. I hope you are getting professional help and have supportive women around you to get through this to the other side.

    • The miscarriage may require a D&C, three months after the fact. Or it’s that the whole shebang set off a mess with my fibroids. I’m going back to the hospital (past all the Covid barriers ugh) and reconnecting with my sisters now. So yes, thanks for the guidance.

  48. I remember an old friend telling me once that with every “season” in life the universe brings you to the “end of yourself” — and I was like “oh that’s just the end of every day for me” — feeling at a complete loss for what to do. Literally like “I just cannot go on.” Except go to bed and expect the sun to rise in the morning. And to be grateful for it, once in awhile. What a lesson in surrender (and joy somehow, I know, somewhere deep down).

    • I wanted to follow up that all is well. I overcame a major relationship pattern and am happy and healthy. I am grateful for that trial and proud of myself for how I handled it. I love this life. Wouldn’t change a thing!

  49. My dearest girlfriend has a grand cross, mutable, conjunct her angles (although out of sign), and a trine to her midheaven. She is perfectly poised and balanced, without being fake or repressed. I have a major opposition that is aligned with one half of her grand cross, with trines and sextiles in my chart. She is a Scorpio with Gemini moon. I am a Taurus with a Sadge moon. This perspective makes so much sense to explain why friendship is so solid despite that fact that we’re so different. She is a friend I hope to keep for a very, very long time, and I’m glad to know we have this dynamic between us.

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