Life, Death & Real Connection

I wrote this in 2017. It seems worth a re-read as Americans head to the polls…

Few would argue the fact, society is deeply divided at this time.  Those on one side cannot relate to the other side. More and more, they don’t even want to try.

This is sort of the facebook reality. You say the wrong thing and get unfriended. This seems insanely superficial to me. There is no real feeling that goes on. It’s like a monkey that’s been taught to sort beans by their color. Green beans in one pile. Blue beans in the other. When you see a blue bean in your green beans, you have to do something about it.

I’m not trying to be offensive. I’m trying to explain something. A person can’t relate to me. I can’t relate to them. I accept this as truth at this point, but it goes so much deeper.

I am not sure if this is due to age, my transits or both. I do have Pluto transiting my 12th house and Saturn joining Pluto, soon enough.  There are a lot of things hidden. But what I’ve come to realize is that most of a person; their life, their feelings and their experience, are never going to be known.  People die and drop off.  They just do.

We do not keep, Marilyn Monroe, alive. Or Elvis. Or Steve Jobs. Or whoever.  We keep their image alive. That person; their soul and such, is really known to no one.  You think you know your partner / your soulmate. I don’t care if you’ve been married, fifty years. You may be very close to your spouse but there is still a spiritual connection with the divine that transcends any human connection.

I have written about Neptune on my midheaven for years. I’m constantly mistaken for who knows what.  It’s always been this way, but when I began to write online; I enjoyed / suffered broader exposure. This phenomena really showed itself. I’ve learned a lot.

I’ve learned that most of life is a mystery. It’s not reasonable, that I would think I could be understood or that I could understand another person. I wonder know if you can only fathom a small fraction of another person’s soul, psyche, intellect…see? We don’t even know what it is we’re dealing with, really.  And whatever it is, it changes. The change can talk place in a fraction of a blink.

I’ve very lucky in that I can communicate with others. Words that describe some experience I am having, come through me and move people. Like when I was on the phone yesterday, with denamaria. Remember her? I started her crying, because she connected with a (life) picture, I was describing in that moment.

Now think ahead some years. Eventually one of us will die.  The other person would have a really hard time trying to get someone to understand and/or appreciate the phenomena that occurred during that call.
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“I like that priest,” I told another friend. “I think he likes me. We’d be friends if I were less stupid. I’m not smart enough to be his friend but we have some connection, just the same.”

This is another example. There is a link between two people. It’s minute. It’s tiny. It’s phenomenally limited, but it’s also vitally important.

How important? How to explain this? Can be explained?

I hope I’ve written this well enough that it’s understandable. Don’t let yourself become a bean sorter. That stuff is not important. It’s a diversion and I’m not even sure it’s real.

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Comments

Life, Death & Real Connection — 23 Comments

  1. Well, two things, firstly this is an expression of inner values. For instance, have you ever met a green party advocate that you did not think does cannabis?

    So if you meet up with a group of friends who are wound up by another friend because he could work but does not and they work. Then the right/ left wing dichotomy is reflected on a more mundane level.

    Secondly, things are dysfunctional in society at the moment so people hide themselves. If there is someone that feels they are born for a vocation that they are not able to do then they will hide themselves, because they are not able to express what is going on deep inside them.

    Also, if people are disempowered, if they have less money, or if relationships are not working so well then they will also do this.

    So not knowing people becomes an inevitability.

    • Thank you. I see now, time comes when you realize you don’t even know yourself, because you’re changing. So when someone is out there pontificating on all they know about another person…a person they may not actually know in the least – it’s just 100 shades of crap. And a true waste of time!

      • Brilliantly well written, Elsa. A beautifully articulated idea. I happen to agree with you, but even so, I think nearly any thoughtful person reading your words would stop and ponder them. Your comparison to the beans…perfect.

        I wish more people would read this.

  2. I’m not a bean sorter, per se, but things have shifted since a year ago. There was once upon a time when I was still on social media and I accepted people of all different colored beans. I disagreed with some of what they said but respected them the same. Then came the election and campaign and it got so ugly and confrontational when I posted an opinion I had (about anything really) I had to exit the social media scene and leave many of those so-called “friends” behind. Respect isn’t always mutual, I’ve learned. Harsh lesson.

    This isn’t a bad thing. It was very eye-opening to say the least. But I made a commitment to keep my personal network far less wide and far more deep. I’m nurturing the true relationships of diversity and substance instead of chasing more followers. And that has been immensely rewarding.

  3. “We do not keep, Marilyn Monroe, alive. Or Elvis. Or Steve Jobs. Or whoever. We keep their image alive.”

    100% true. But we also keep their our projections of them alive too.

  4. Something else as well. This is reflected in the tendency of society everywhere. For instance, there was a time when people went to church and other institutions and had larger more resilient families. But as we have a lot more societal problems people are more disconnected. People are poorer, they are partnering less, opportunities, in my comparatively short life time I’m sure, have shrunk since the crash. There is less emphasis on traditional family structure.

    I have a close friend, who has had a girl friend for four years that I have not met. Pretty much the only way for me to meet my sister is to take her out because her mother interfer’s every twenty seconds in any conversation I have with her if we are at her place, and my sister has broken contact because of a minor spat over facebook. When my father was alive he met my best friend a grand total of one time.

    So facebook is as much a symptom of the problem. Moreso than the cause.

  5. When I looked at the deepest part of my small self, I discovered there was nothing there. Because the personality is just an illusion. The personality includes everything that is in contrast to our environment or a relationship to it. The reason one can never know the small self is because there is no small self. There is only the greater/higher Self.

    Now we do each have a unique point of view (I’m not talking about personal opinions, but actual perception) and that can feel isolating if one does not feel close to god. Its a lonely thought that only we are seeing things from a certain angle but really we are seeing life through gods eyes. Everything has already been created but this moment is only being perceived once by the creator through our eyes.

  6. ” You may be very close to your spouse but there is still a spiritual connection with the divine that transcends any human connection.”
    Yes, well said.

  7. I’ve had to work hard to get Facebook-unblocked by my last ex. I’ve never been blocked before. For her, blocking people is a routine thing. I’d never do that to a person unless they were threatening me, persistently, or something similarly aggressive. However the huge difference between our mindsets has become apparent. I have to carefully choose my words with her. Our communication is strained, artificial and withering. My point is, people who lightly unfriend you don’t really have an open mind anyway.
    As for the rest of your post… it is on point. No one can share their experience of life unless they write a memoir, then they can share a part of it. And when people die their unshared parts go with them. What you gave stays. I don’t know… there is no need to share everything with the world. Our experiences drive us forward, that’s what’s important.
    I’ve met been-counters in my life. They don’t need Facebook to manifest that mentality. I consider it a narrow tribal approach – they collect only the similar and the fitting. They are basically power hoarders. The only problem can come from a desire to be accepted by them while acting against your own nature. Everyone must ask themselves whether fulfilling that desire is worth the cost.

  8. Thank you for your thoughts! 🙂

    I see everyone as my mirror of my soul by the reaction triggered inside myself to them, their actions, their views, etc. What I reject in another, I’m actual rejecting some aspect of myself! What I accept in another I agree with and embracing within myself.

    Each person is ultimately, unknown to them, my teacher! They teach me about my own self, my soul. All of them are glimpses ultimately into aspects of myself if I’m smart enough to recognize it, and allow myself to be taught by them!

    Go deep enough and you will understand your own self, your own soul well! In the end you realise critical judgements of others are really disguised internal baggage not yet processed, healed and brought back into balance by yourself. :)))

  9. This was written just before the great American eclipse. You know the one with the diagonal path of totality line slicing the country in half.

  10. The link between two people.. why is it phenomenally limited?
    I like to think it’s not limited if only everyone had my Perception. Conversations I have with people in real life or online are important to me. & I usually find it’s the other person that limits.
    If I could talk deep convos with every person I come across, I would. But most people don’t open up like that for fear of being judged or whatever. Or because they don’t have time. Which is just an excuse to keep following the same routine of this new world.
    If people would just break the cycle of doing the same unconscious routine day in and day out & be open to meaningful connections like I am it would make me happy 🙂

  11. This is an excellent article. These are the things that have been on my mind; you can never really know anyone. There’s always the unknown country, that is the connection to the divine.

  12. What drives me crazy is how so many people require 100% agreement with their positions. Disagree? Ex-communication!!! lol Grow up! Find some middle ground, reach out across the gap for crying out loud.

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