Is Every Gift Is A Curse & Every Curse A Gift?

Vintage postcard JupiterThe idea that every gift is a curse and vice versa is a quite a phenomena. I’ve taken some incredible hits in my life. These are just not things you can characterize as “gifts”, but if you open your mind, you can see it that way.  If nothing else, it could have been worse! That means what happened was a gift!

Recently I was knocked for a loop. I actually thought it might be a death blow.  You know something can happen to someone and it just breaks them so deeply inside, they’re never the same? I thought this might be like that.  I thought this for many months. Nearly a year. I don’t talk about stuff like this by the way. It’s nobodies business.

But then, unexpectedly, I found myself relieved to the bone, the situation was the way it is. I was stunned.

When I look back over all my pain and suffering, never once did it enter my mind, I would ever be glad to have been so horribly betrayed.  Under what circumstances would one celebrate such a thing?

But I feel this way now. I thank God it went the way it did. And it just goes to show you, even on your darkest day, it makes sense to maintain a least a glimmer of hope.  Because we don’t know the future.

When we find out what the future is, we can be very glad for a separation or a coming together with someone or something else in this world. All the sudden, the bad, horrible thing is phenomenally good.

Life is really something else.  It’s marvelous, really.  Even on the days you don’t realize it.

Have you ever been relieved a bad thing happened, further down the road?


Is Every Gift Is A Curse & Every Curse A Gift? — 15 Comments

  1. I am very grateful for your reminding me of this truth today Elsa, as I am letting go of someone and it is painful right now. I suspect in the future I will know it is a blessing but right now it just sucks.

    I have had many difficult passages that in hindsight were gifts that brought me closer to myself.

    I was unwell for many years and during that time I studied astrology and found I had a gift for it. I then got better and spent 10 years studying art and getting trained to teach art and while still dabbling in the astrology it want my main focus.

    The last few years my health issues resurfaced and once again I have had tons of time to focus on my astrological side. It has become my passion and a kind of calling. If I had never gotten sick I would never had found this out.

    Ive been a bit down this week and your post has inspired me to persevere.

    Life works in strange ways!

  2. Those horribly painful hits are gifts. Being broken, in my view, is a way of shattering our illusions in life, and our egos, causing us to realize that no matter what, we must become our true, authentic selves.

    You ”celebrate” by picking yourself up, being alive, and sharing your wisdom. Painful experiences make you a natural born healer, if you keep your heart open. It also teaches you to avoid anyone who is capable of inflicting pain on you again. Death blows? They are transformative in the long run. Gifts. Minus cute wrapping paper & bows.


  3. I don’t know. I suppose it is true that pain may bring grace, help one mature, break the ego trap, or leave one open for meaningful surprises down the road. But if losing cherished loved ones, undergoing severe physical or mental anguish, or either witnessing or experiencing terrible injustices are “gifts,” then please tell me, where can one return them?

  4. I had a hint of this today. This guy from my old job who I was very close to, anyway he has not seen me (to go to lunch) in the 8 months since I was let go. He’ll text but that’s about it. He’ll go long periods of time without texting. This last time it’s been almost two months. The wound had largely “healed” or scabbed over then this morning he texts me. I wrote back once. Then he called, which is unusual, but I was at a client meeting and couldn’t answer. I texted when I got home to see what he wanted and he said “just wanted to say hi.” It infuriates me. It rips off the scab and brings it all up again, why can’t this person who claims to want to be my friend, make a $*%& lunch date?

    I realize in the face of death-loss and difficult physical health issues this may seem trivial but emotionally, it rips me up all over again and brings back to the forefront feelings about the job and the people who have not been supportive, all over again. I fired off an email which I’m not sure he’ll even read. Now I have to start the process of trying not to let it bother me, all over again when I was feeling I’d let it go before his contact.

    I guess the lesson in it is for me to either get over it and accept what passes for friendship like he presents it, occasional “checking in” texts, or for me to tell him to never contact me again once and for all. I guess I’ve never completely slammed the door on him. So I’m trying to look for where the gift is in this curse. If nothing else, I feel like I stood up for myself in the email. Whether it makes anything change remains to be seen.

  5. Sounds like Saturn/Jupiter transit/s.

    Dont the right wing catholoics believe the way to heavon is through a hard life?

    Pandoras box?

    No help goes unpunished.

  6. Yes. I’ve been grateful for “bad things” which I now choose to look at as disruptions and realignments. It makes looking at situations in retrospect quite a bit easier to bear. And having developed this attitude it helps me not get so bent out of shape when things don’t work out the way I want them to. Gracie’s right on so many levels. The more broken my ego has become the more peaceful my relationships are.

  7. Yes. Six years ago this month, we pulled our tiny home onto the island community where we have rooted. Illness reconfigured me, Gracie’s thoughts about breaking the ego fits with what has happened with me, too. Illusions about what is important, and what’s not so important are rebuilding a more sustainable life. Somewhere on this blog Elsa writes ’bout the action of “anchor deep.” I find that to be a good practice. First, I had to find what anchors me: what ideas, practices, and people believe in me now … the one who is ill and/or well. Then, I get to remember how to be that person for others.

    Down the road a piece, time is relative. A decade, a lifetime, I’m lucky to be alive to answer the question.

  8. something happened last year that caused me to start talking again. it wouldn’t have happened any other way. even though i’m glad i’m talking again, i can’t say i’m glad it happened.

  9. My mother died from Lou Gehrig’s disease and suffered horribly with an ever-diminishing quality of life for four years. The only gift she got was the relief of finally dying. Is a curse a gift? Depends what it is.

  10. Being able to change your perspective is such a powerful gift. It releases you really. I’m so glad you are speaking about this elsa. This attitude is really inspiring and really valueable. Especially this day in age.

  11. I think it’s part of figuring out who I really am. The culture programmed me that there was one way to be. And success was measured by how much a person could be like that. The more a person fit the ideal program the more successful they were. But all that never really interested me enough to follow the program and I could not understand why. I was offered or only heard a very narrow scenario of what life is, can be. I am something other than the show. These realizations kinduv came through with transiting Jupiter and NN conjuncting my PoF. And you are right Elsa, it’s personal and would not make a lick of sense to anyone else. It’s my mystery.

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