How Should I Handle Obstacles In My Life?

red dwarfHi, Elsa.

If you’re set on a course of action, and then face delays and obstacles (not once, but say, three or four times), would you give up & change course?

Thanks from India

This is a really good question, especially with Saturn currently transiting Sagittarius.  Giving up is a personal decision but I would ask myself, “What do these obstacles (Saturn) mean (Sagittarius)?”

If quitting becomes a habit, you’re not going to get very far in life.  Think about it. The going gets tough and you quit! But there are other times, when continued failure is most definitely a sign to choose a different path.

If you’ll take the time to analyse these situations when they come up, it’s generally pretty easy to discern which decision is right. If it’s not clear, I would probably persevere until it was clear. I’d do this to avoid regret.  I wouldn’t want to look back and think I should have gone one more round.

Let me give you some examples…

When my husband was young, he wanted a career in music. He went to college to study music, He got mostly A’s one B and one F.  The F was in singing. His teacher told him he would not be able to carry a tune if it had handles.

Besides music, he had aptitude in math, science and military arts. That one F would indicate to me, he’s not meant to be a singer.

Other people suffers gobs of rejection, persevere anyway, and wind up successful. I’m an example of this.

I wanted a job writing for an astrology site, but no one would hire me. I didn’t like this. I really thought they were making a mistake. I had something to say so I started my own site. I eclipsed the sites that had rejected me within the first year.

So sometimes you don’t get something because it’s not for you.
Other times, you do need to work around some kind of impediment.

There are some obstacles I would never try to get by, though. For example, I’d not beg someone to marry me or love me or something like that.

Last, you specifically say you are facing “delay” and “obstacles”.  I would separate these things out for a clearer picture…

“Delay” is rarely a reason to quit.  Everyone wants things to happen on their timetable but you can’t control every aspect of something you’re trying to do.  It’s normal to feel frustrated when things are delayed, but I’d not hop off a train headed in the direction I wanted to go, just because it was slow or it broke down, temporarily.

“Obstacles” should be weighed. Assume the universe is conspiring in your best interest. What is it trying to tell you?  That you’re headed up the wrong path? Or that you should strengthen your resolve, because the thing you’re after really is the right thing for you?

Also, consider the effect that your stubbornness (if that’s what it is) is having on others.  If people are being harmed, this would be a clue you’ve got to find another tack.

I did look at your chart. I see a hard worker who will ultimately be successful. So if you’re struggling, then just make sure you really want the thing you’re struggling for.

If the answer is yes, I would not only keep going, I’d redouble my efforts because you have that capacity.

Don’t quit because you’re afraid to fail. Quit when it’s been clearly shown to you, you’re slaving in the wrong arena.

Good luck!

Have you ever thrown in the towel, prematurely?

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Comments

How Should I Handle Obstacles In My Life? — 17 Comments

  1. Perfect timing Elsa! I have been fixating on this question for the past couple of days. I’ve ignored my intuition when I’ve had obstacles before, and have regretted it, but right now my intuition is being silent. I’ve decided to make my decision based on monetary reasons. If I have to shell out another $500 then the universe is telling me no.

  2. Yeah, I say keep going and look for signs. You will always have *some* solid support if you’re headed in the right direction. This does not mean doors fling open. It means, deep down you know.

    Being a quitter is one of the worst habits you can form because it’s so hard to overcome. I’d rather be beaten than quit.

    • I took a certain professional (math) exam and failed FOUR times. This was 1 of 2 prerequisite exams in a series of 10 that you take over your lifetime. After failing for the fourth time, I gave up. Even now, I think I could pass it if I dedicated enough time, but then I would have 9 more exams I need to pass to stay employed, lol. Failing/giving up was good in this case because I took a different path that was more suitable.

  3. Thanks Elsa. Very helpful, that distinction between delays and obstacles. Off I go to ponder my situation with this new perspective!

  4. “Don’t quit because you’re afraid to fail. Quit when it’s been clearly shown to you, you’re slaving in the wrong arena.”

    Many times when I was younger I gave up on stuff for emotional reasons. I’d become afraid, frustrated, pissed off or in some other way lacking the emotional tools to handle a situation. Invariably I’d find myself returning to those areas when I’d calmed down.

    But these days I quit when I’ve tried all lines of enquiry. Sometimes I have to pluck up the courage to try a new technique or method but the more often I did that, the more often it became a standard part of my toolkit. When I’ve tried everything that’s reasonably possible then giving up just becomes the only option. Usually by that time I’m ready to move on and it becomes a release.

  5. One other thought … and this mirrors Elsa’s writing experience …

    People often feel there’s only one way to achieve a goal. When a boulder blocks the road, they believe the only way forwards is to blow it to smithereens. But it’s equally valid to go round it, climb over it, to chip a hole big enough to squeeze through it, to roll it away, or call up air support to give you a lift past it.

    That seems obvious but you’d be surprised how often people are offered chances by the universe (or even other people) that will solve their problems, but they don’t take them because the solutions don’t fit their preconceived notions. Those people don’t seem to know how to be open to negotiate or compromise.

  6. Great post!
    I highly appreciate Elsa’s direct logic and clarity – gets right to the heart of the matter, no nonsense and good analysis. (Is that Capricorn?)
    It’s always nice to have a positive boost, and suggestions at how to approach problems. It’s true one can get mired in unprodutive mental habits.
    Many thanks!

  7. I agree with Gabrielle B. An excellent piece of writing(and thinking – as always :-)) Elsa. Very helpful to me. I think because my Mars (in Leo but tucked away in a watery ruled 12th Hse, squared by Saturn on one side and Neptune on the other poor thing battered and bamboozled)has difficulty expressing or even knowing what’s ‘for me’ or even what I want. I have often changed course or give up in the face of obstacles out of sheer demoralisation and confusion.I agree so much that we do best when we follow our desires and the expression of what we personally have to offer. I just have a confusing time knowing what I want and what this means for me…
    Thank you again Elsa !

  8. I think I have this problem as well…. I sometimes quit because I am afraid or because I just know it won’t work out. How can I stop this? Because if I feel emotionally bad about a situation and it’s causing me harm, I just quit and want to run away and find.peace. otherwise, I can’t go on with my life and I feel as if I am slowly dying.

  9. I have a Saturn Square Sun so I’ve had to reconsider my direction many times due to the restrictions of other’s influences (Square) and I can say it’s a pain in the rear. You definitely have to take the Saturn side of your personality and preserve, as the author was saying. I’ve sometimes been so bogged down by obstacles that it seems like there is literally no direction to go in but you still have to pick back up again. I’d say in these situations to consider what skills and paths seem most natural fitting and benefit others, and continue on with your skills to achieve something.

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