He’s Violent and She’s Walking On Eggshells: Mars, Uranus, Jupiter in a T-Square

mars vintage posterDear Elsa,

In January this year, I met the man I am with. He says he loves me very much; however, he has a bad temper and reacts to the slightest thing. We have moved in together and I find I am walking on eggshells.

What is in store for me? Please help.

Frightened
Dear Frightened,

I can’t tell you what is in store for you, because it is dependent on what you do next. I am forever harping about women using their Mars, that is, their male energy. It is very important you assert yourself. It is critical that you do something about your situation, otherwise I am quite certain you are going to continue to be hurt.

See, he’s not going to stop. And the more he beats you down, the more he is going to beat you down. And the more beat down you get, the harder it is going to be to get yourself out of this.

Now you post is vague so I am not exactly sure what’s happening to you but I do know these things always get worse over time. Even when it stops, it starts back up and the sooner you decide to fight back, the sooner you’ll be free of this – and the sooner you are free of this, the less damage he will have had a chance to inflict and the shorter your recovery time. So considering all this, I would suggest you start plotting a way out of this relationship… this minute.

If you don’t know how or where to start, keep doing what you did when you wrote me. Reach out and tell people what is going on with you. Do not keep his secrets. You were born in India and I don’t know if you still live there, or what resources may exist, but I do know help of some kind is always available to anyone who asserts themselves with conviction.

So if you have access to a “battered women’s hotline”, call them. The National Domestic Violence Hotline in the United States is 1-800-799-SAFE. There are people there who are very knowledgeable about your situation and I would know because I used to be one of them. They can help you map your way out and support you every step of the way.

See, here’s the thing to know. You have anger and rage inside of you. And if you don’t accept this and access your energy and apply it a healthy way, you are going to meet it outside yourself. Get it? If you won’t assert yourself, you can expect to asserted upon. But if you are willing to fight and to act in your own best interest… well, your chart is formidable and I have no doubt you can get out of this relationship and go on to have any life you want.

Good luck.

 


Comments

He’s Violent and She’s Walking On Eggshells: Mars, Uranus, Jupiter in a T-Square — 4 Comments

  1. “See, here’s the thing to know. You have anger and rage inside of you. And if you don’t accept this and access your energy and apply it a healthy way, you are going to meet it outside yourself. Get it? If you won’t assert yourself, you can expect to
    be asserted upon. But if you are willing to fight and to act in your own best interest…”

    …and this is why i like what you do here Elsa.

    the above is nothing but wisdom in its purest form. thanks, i really need to read this and say it out loud to myself today.

    Frightened

    your situation sounds unbearable to me. i think it brave of you to ask for advice. i’m starting to realise that courage is emotions/feelings directed in a caring focused way in order to put myself in a more valued context… sorry, can’t explain it any clearer.

    i wish you well.

  2. Yikes!

    I feel for you, Frightened. Although it wasn’t with a mate, I know what it’s like to live in an abusive situation. You have my utmost sympathy and support, for what that’s worth.
    The door is open. I wish you the courage to walk through it.

  3. Please google “abusive personality” and I’m sure you’ll find much information that echoes the situation you find yourself in.

    Stand up for yourself and get out!

    I wish I had understand the things then I know now. I would have recognized the signs and I would have never gotten involved with that lowlife scum.

    Trust your guts and intuition and don’t allow this person to throw you off balance by telling you that he loves you. People don’t abuse people that they truly love.

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