Gemini – Mental Love!

Gemini cheater

Not exactly

Gemini! Everyone knows that Geminis are fun, engaging conversationalists. They know all the trivia, all the gossip, and where all the best parties are. They are lively and fascinating and seem to know every person on the planet. They are the best friends you could ever ask for. But when it comes to relationships, they get a bum rap.

They’re liars, people say. They prioritize entertainment over truth, novelty over depth. They are too intellectual to really feel anything or be sympathetic to another person. They care more about their social circle than their partners.  No one person or thing could ever hold their interest. In fact, they’re basically ADHD personified. Their desire to experience everything possible means they can’t be faithful. With Gemini’s symbol being the Twins, it only follows that they have two faces and lead double lives. At least, that’s what people say.

I am here to tell you this couldn’t be further from the truth. Yes, Geminis are social, cerebral hummingbirds. Yes, they are suckers for anything interesting or novel. And sure, sometimes they even have two lives. But it’s not at all what you think.

First, Gemini are fascinating. They know a little bit about everything, and they have an amazing knack for translating that information into something fun. Gemini are always ready with a factoid or witticism. They are pretty much incapable of being bored or boring. And if they somehow run out of something to say, they’ll make something up! Now, I know I know that feeds into the “liar” stereotype, but that is only the case with young or otherwise unformed Gemini. Instead, most Gemini will use their excellent imaginations to come up with wild, obviously fictional stories that will have you rolling on the floor. And unlike Leo, which might get a little annoyed by too much audience participation, Gemini will be thrilled if you jump in and add details of your own! And while this might still sound like a trait that’s better suited for friendship than love, think about this: How many of us are bored with our partners? How many of us complain that we’ve heard the same five stories over and over until we think we’re going to explode? How many of us have endured long, drawn-out car rides with nothing but silence? You’ll never have that with Gemini. For them, boredom just doesn’t make sense. There’s always something more to learn or to say! Stick with them, and there will never be another dull moment.

gemini mirror

Finally, someone who gets me!

Also, it’s hardly true that Gemini are naturally unfaithful. I am personally acquainted with many, many Geminis, and all are scrupulously faithful. This is because they have found their person! Gemini is the sign of the twin, see? They do not want to operate alone. In love, Gemini are looking for their other half. They want someone who is just as curious and intelligent and mischievous as they are. They’re looking to see themselves mirrored in the other. When they find that, they have no reason to stray. It would be like ripping themselves in half.

They also offer their own unique kind of support. It’s true that Twins are not the most emotional of creatures. But this can be a great thing! When things are going wrong, sometimes we want a shoulder to cry on, but just as often, we want someone to listen and help us understand what’s happening. That’s where Gemini comes in. Gemini is perfectly happy to sit with you and talk for hours, analyzing every aspect of your problem in excruciating detail. They will hear you out, ask piercing questions, and provide startling insights. And they’ll do it all without an agenda. With other signs, it’s possible to feel a little judged or like they are somehow invested in you behaving a certain way. Not Gemini.  With Gemini, there’s no control, no judgement, only information. What you do with it is up to you.

And that’s another amazing thing about Gemini. They will accept you for who you are. They fundamentally understand that variety is a strength. They don’t need to only mix with people who are just like them. How boring would that be? They’d far rather understand someone than judge them. They only ask the same in return.

Which brings us to the double life allegation. Yes, there’s a kernel of truth to the idea. But it is far less sinister if you understand the mechanism behind it.  Gemini are Mutable signs. They do not enjoy conflict. They don’t try to impose their point of view on others, and they can’t tolerate another person imposing their view on them. If Gemini feels like they can’t be accepted as-is, they will look around for an escape hatch rather than stay to fight it out. If this means lies and subterfuge, so be it. So if a Gemini hides from you, they probably have a reason.

And this is not always such a terrible thing! My sister is a great example. At heart, she is a free-spirited, fun-loving, wild biker lady. She is also a very high-level project manager for a Fortune 100 company. These things aren’t always especially compatible, so she’s essentially constructed two identities. She’s crafted this so thoroughly that even her voice is different. A common conversation in our family runs like this:

Mom: I heard you talked to your sister today! How is she?

Me: Oh, I have no idea. When I called, I got Work-Kelly, not Kelly-Kelly.

And at the same time, her friends wouldn’t recognize the short, cold, ultra-professional version of herself that she inhabits at work. But see what she did? She found a way to be authentic in two ways. She recognized that it was unrealistic to marry those two worlds, so she found a workaround. I think this is by far the most common way this tendency is expressed.

Finally, it’s true that Gemini really prioritize friendship. Given their need for novelty and mental stimulation, there’s really no other way it could play out. But this is a lovely thing to have in a partner! And what it really is, is Gemini taking responsibility for their own happiness. With their mental engines running on high at all times, it’s simply not possible for one person to be able to provide them with all the entertainment, conversation, and stimulation they need. They recognize this and build a workaround. So when you need sometime alone, no problem! They can call up one of their many, many friends and go to the museum. And when they come back, they’ll inevitably have a hilarious story to tell.

So it’s true that Gemini is a special breed. Loving one certainly isn’t for everyone. If you’re looking for a steady, practical partner, or a soft, nurturing lover, Taurus or Cancer is a better bet. But if you want a lively, fascinating partner who will be your best friend and keep you rolling on the floor laughing, Gemini is the one for you. All they ask for is acceptance and good conversation. And in return, you’ll get a life of love, adventures, and more fun that you can even handle.

Tell us your stories of loving Gemini!

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Gemini – Mental Love! — 20 Comments

  1. Wonderful. I have two best friends with Gemini moons. Talk about the best people to go to for advice, enticing conversation, and brain storming! One of them is more of an intellectual…the other seeks more of a party and always increasing her circle. Both consistently teach me more every time I spend time with them. They both show their love in ways that make you really think and they always want to spark up a new experience. I do know a few Gemini suns and I truly don’t understand why they get the bad rap they do. Thanks for the post, Midara.

  2. Emphasis on MENTAL. Not all Geminis are storytellers. I find Leo to be more of a creative fiction style storyteller. Geminis tend to yap and insert some factoids out of turn. They tend to be “precocious” (like Russell Brand) and pick stuff up out of nowhere. A lot of them seem to like the sound of words and flourish in elementary school, reading earlier than others, that I’ve met. Geminis with water placements are a lot more overt about their emotions (again that I’ve met) and a bit more raw and vocal about how raw they are.
    I think Russell Brand is a good example of a Gemini, very naturally talented and seeming to pick stuff up out of thin air, but also a bit schizo and untrustworthy, lacking in conviction behind his random sentences. He’s a lightning rod and always surprising with what he knows, but I wouldn’t want to be in a relationship with him and think there are layers under his public persona, also that his “peace and bliss” thing is a bit phony. But, he is a hardworking comic and not a class clown, so there must be something to him. James Acaster for me any day <3 <3 <3
    Idk, Gemini Moons have been very accepting. Geminis tend to be really frazzled in some way, totally my projection. They pick up a lot of radio status. I said it before and I'll say it again, the tragedy of Gemini is that they feel fake in their personality, emotions, experience of life, etc. Could be because they try on so many different personalities, could be because there is often a buzzy inner monologue.
    I have to say that ummm.. in my rather desperate search for attention, the dudes that have messed around with me despite having girlfriends were Geminis. (We were both complicit and we were both fallible, novelty-seeking idiots.) There is a gemini who sent me some message about being "kinky buddies." I puked in my mouth at the phrase. HAHA hahahaha. The messing with him was from seven judgment calls of "no" that lead me to saying yes. (My judgment in the moment isn't the best.. especially when riddled with loneliness and the feeling that I can't get anyone to like me.)
    Listening hasn't been the best quality in every Gemini I've met. Listening seems to be learned.

  3. When I think of Gemini, I think of the Pi Trailer, at the very best. I haven’t been around a lot of them recently other than one very good friend.

  4. Also, Geminis do sometimes run out of tricks. They can bore you. That’s why they vary up the people they see. Cause the idea of not having stuff to say is exhausting. So is the idea of spending time with boring people. I think Geminis sometimes suffer when it comes to finding a calling or one thing to do, unlike Leo they don’t *just* want to be the star, they want to do all the roles or keep switching them. If they have a lot of other influences in their chart, they can judge themselves for their own flightiness. But, being around the same people all day or a group of people they know in different contexts can be difficult. Letting someone else talk is sometimes easier than putting on a show, but I believe it takes time to learn. The weird thing is how Geminis do want to glitter and be seen as rare and smart and get attention, they also tire of it and want to hang back. It’s hard to feel satisfied with ever changing needs and desires, it’s hard to feel you’ve achieved something when you hop from one thing to another, but most Geminis have more chart than that.

    • Guess what I mean is their stories are non linear. And a lot of free associations and random insertions. Wouldn’t call them masters at the craft of a yarn. However, I think they are good with words, conversation, and sparkling insights or other pieces that make people think they’re smart. Also good at delivering short news clips.

      I have placements and am a crap storyteller if you can even follow my winding train of thought.

      • I am better at other types of communication, but stories are not my strength. Overanalyzing and providing information? That I sometimes engage in.

  5. The Gemini’s I know are very witty, great fun and never boring. They are quite observant and have good memory recall too 🙂

  6. My daughter. She can seem bi polar at times but that is usually hormonal. When she was a little girl she used to come home and tell me the best stories, even if they were exaggerated a bit I did not mind, it was so entertaining. Now she can talk for hours. I tease her when I am listening to her that I understand she needs to get those 10,000 words out a day.She has a Sag me with a leo moon and Taurus venus. She is my best friend and she knows she can tell me anything without judgement. She is my biggest support. I am so lucky to have her in my life.

  7. You’ve described the love of my life. We are perfectly opposite, complementary, different identical twins in every way.

    This was a beautiful reminder of the many many ways he loves me. Thank you!

  8. Thank you! Indeed finally someone who gets me: ”They don’t try to impose their point of view on others, and they can’t tolerate another person imposing their view on them”. This is so very true!

  9. Sorry.. I have Gemini placements and felt like ranting about how not great they and I am :/ not meant to insult others.. just feeling frustrated (thanx Libra filled sky and moon Saturn transit)

  10. I have Gemini in the 5th house and the 4th, and for the 5th house I can say that 1: I tend to be attracted to these fellas, even if my other planets are very Plutonian/Scorpio like.

    2: I have two major hobbies which I switch between. Then there is the other hobbies, which ensures I will never be bored. The 5th house is the fun house of course…

    I do have a tendency to be very Gemini-like when dating.
    When I reach the 7th/8th house areas though… things start to be become a little more heavy, with Libra Moon in the 8th and Leo and virgo in the 7th.

    I am seldom what I look like on the surface. I like to play with diffferent clothing styles and addornments. HAts have been my favorite for some time.
    I also sports an Aqurian ascendant. I don’t do tight, practical stuff all the time, this bores me to death! Nah, let’s go somewhere new where we can talk about what we see and experience, eat some good food and take pictures of weird stuff we see. That’s me in a nutshell.

    Then let’s go home and make the windows in the bedroom foggy. But please, do it in a stylish fashion, allright?
    Classic Scorpio/Libra 8th house style.

    No wonder Venus Geminis tend to be interested and intrigued – until I reveal my heavier nature. For a time they are fascinated, but then they balk and find a way out. If not outright lying and/or cheating themselves out.

    Classic mismatch between elements and signs…

    • Anette, do you identify with having a Gemini 4th house? According to whole sign houses it would prob be in Taurus. Do you find that you’re having home upheavals or any things that point to Uranus transiting your 4th?

      Walking around and eating stuff is super fun. What creative stuff do you do to satisfy your Gemini 5th house? I have Chiron in the 5th house so trying to have fun isn’t always satisfying.

  11. I have a Gemini Midheaven… I actually have a nice collection of Geminis in my life and they have heavier placements (pluto, saturn, or even having some water helps) so I can take them more seriously. Their ways can annoy me because I love depth, I am not amused by exaggeration or the lack of stability either… I look at them as almost always in some state of confusion or always overthinking/ over analyzing (my Virgo rising can relate).

    I intimidate the more airy ones, I’m mostly Pluto, Saturn and a little bit of Jupiter… I accept and love them as friends however I could never date one (that includes Gemini venus and mars… just stay away) One of my best friends is a Gemini. I value them.

    • Yeahhh Ang always sparks comin out of their head.. not knowing wtf is going on…

      I don’t get mad at exaggeration too much, I do get mad when someone is lying. Don’t have time for people who color their stories to make themselves look good or are afraid of vulnerability. How can you get to know them? If they won’t show you their metaphorical guilt and sadness butthole? (Say what you will about Lena Dunham but she doesn’t hide damaging stories about herself)

  12. As a Gemini Sun and Mars person, I salute your post!

    You’d be amazed at the different personalities I’ve lived, viva Gemini!

  13. “When things are going wrong, sometimes we want a shoulder to cry on, but just as often, we want someone to listen and…” just say something, something surprising, that means “I like you.”

    My brother – Gemini AC, to my Gemini Moon, once said, “Your life sucks 🙂 ” – making me laugh. A fresh perspective is a loving gift.

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