Does Mars Aspecting Saturn Make A Person Bitter?

Mars dark backgroundThere’s a good discussion on the Astrology and Bitterness post. A number of people postulated that Mars in hard aspect to Saturn denotes bitterness. I disagree.

My husband has Saturn and Mars in hard aspect. He’s not bitter at all. His Mars is highly disciplined. I think this aspect says more about cruelty and endurance…perhaps cold action.

People FEEL bitter. They think bitter thoughts. Consequently, I’d expect to see the Moon and/or Mercury involved.

I also think people are often bitter in regards to their families (Moon) or siblings (Mercury).  When they are bitter against people outside their family, the person is often a substitute for the family member.

What do you think?

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Does Mars Aspecting Saturn Make A Person Bitter? — 63 Comments

  1. I think one of the core roots of bitterness is an underlying belief that reality should be different than it is. Like you we’re wrongfully denied something (riches, love, respect, success) that you were ENTITLED to. This is the reason it can be so hard to dissolve bitterness…until that underlying belief (that you are a victim, you were wronged, it’s not FAIR) changes, there can be no relief. This is why it’s so tenacious and crippling. At its core there is a profound distrust in the universe; a belief that the wrong thing can happen.

    People who have a strong and healthy faith and spirituality often have a remarkable ability (skill?) to be able to find the silver lining in any situation. Their resilience and trust offer them the option of finding an interpretation of the scenario that empowers them, benefits them, or comforts them. Like, wow it really sucked when my mom died, but it gave me the chance to open my heart more fully with friends than I had ever allowed myself to do before, and life is now richer as a result. A bitter person would just feel betrayed by the universe and harbor the resentment over losing someone so key to their happiness.
    Same with being jealous of a friend’s success…do you choose to resent them? Or use it as motivation and insight to realize you are not satisfied with your own success, and maybe ask them for advice on how to be more successful yourself?

    So I’m going to have to say Neptune plays a huge role here. Lack of faith; playing the victim; delusional ideas of how reality should be; passive aggressive silent resentment (bitterness); not understanding the boundaries between self and other (he has that great thing so I should too!); and ultimately self sabotage, since miring oneself in bitterness is a great way to ruin your life.

    I’ll also suggest Pluto…those deep wounds, the obsessive grudge holding, the power plays. (Because blaming others for your misery is a way of refusing to acknowledge the source of your own power. You external use your power, this have the convenience of feeling hitter without acknowledging your own responsibility.

    I struggle with bitterness sometimes, but can usually find my way out of it because of my optimistic and faith filled Sag moon. I do have Neptune quincunx mars; Pluto square mars; mars and Saturn in cancer; mercury quincunx Pluto and Neptune. For your research… 🙂

    • I was just coming on here to say something similar! The bitter people I know keep complaining about how things suck for them, but they won’t do anything about it!

      They don’t want to do any hard work, inner or outer…someone else has to hand it to them or they’ll stay stuck in whatever mess they created.

      I learned a long time ago that if I want something done or if I simply want something, get it done myself.

      • The astrology of the two most bitter people I know, and neither has Mars/Saturn:

        1) Venus/Saturn/Neptune fixed t square.

        2) Moon square the Uranus/Neptune in Capricorn conjunction AND a Venus/Mars/Jupiter triple conjunction, all square Pluto.

        • Interesting that you’ve included Venus…I’ve got Venus aspecting all four as well. (Square Saturn, square mars, opposite Pluto, tribe Neptune.) The laziness aspect of Venus makes sense in the context of not feeling inclined to do the work to improve things.

          I was also thinking of how bitterness is kind of the anti-Sagittarius. The most bitter person I know is a sadge sun! But in her life any expansiveness is tightly constrained. Heavy set but clothes are way too tight. Tons of possessions but unusually small house. It’s like she’s about to explode! I’m thinking there must be a Saturn-Jupiter signature there. Constriction of abundance, misery and perpetual lack of gratitude in what the world has to offer.

          Any thoughts on bitterness as a phenomenon of an afflicted Jupiter via Saturn? Or maybe Jupiter in the 12th house? Just curious. (I have Jupiter square Saturn myself.)

      • I ‘handed’ it to the ‘love of my life.’ The whole buffet was in front of him. He simply could not partake.. He was the horse lead to water but I could not make him drink…So sad…

      • What many people dont or wont recognise is that their complaining attracts more of the same to them. It is now officially recognised that thoughts do create our reality. I think it is much deeper and Ive often found that when i try to share what I have learned to maybe help people to get out of their hole, they most times dismiss my ideas as whacky preferring to stay in their attention seeking ways and hanging on to what they see as being able to control thier lives – sadly they dont or wont see this and hand over trust that a greater power has more control and all we can do is help ourselves the best we know how to.

    • I agree that this essay was profound and I identify with my own spiritual evolution of moving from the half empty to half filled cup; to seeing the silver lining in every ‘negative’ situation. EVENTS are NOT positive or negative it is the VALUE we place on them. DOING Byron Katie’s THE WORK helped me see that our OWN THOUGHTS are our worst enemy. Change your thoughts/perceptions, change your reality!

    • Not everybody has sag in their charts.
      Bitterness and a sense of entitlement? Lack of faith?
      playing the victim? delusional ideas of how reality should be? passive aggressive silent resentment (bitterness)? not understanding the boundaries between self and other (he has that great thing so I should too?
      I dont know…I wouldnt hesitate to say that this is similar to kicking a dog when its down and blaming the dog when it howls and wimpers..especially if you broke its back.
      Bitteress hurts. Nobody wants to hurt. People experience different things in their life that make them bitter. I would think if some people told their horrific life story we would all fall silent, look at the ground and shuffle our feet while mumbling an apology after offering the perspective about self pity, self entitlement, littleness, lack of faith. Its best not to put that perspective on things really.
      Sometimes bitterness is not a choice. Perhaps your faith in the universe doing things for a reason or teaching you a lesson puts you in this perspective.
      But there are really people in the world who deserve to be bitter.
      Mothers in concentration camps who were forced by the Nazis to decide Which of their children had to go to the gas chamber. Or the man whose family deserted him when he became a quadrapalegic stuck in a nursing home at 15 after an altercation with an abusive father. Part of grace is to withold judgement about how we perceive others. If we put on some peoples shoes to walk that mile, how many of us would not be limping at the end.
      Some people get bitter more easily. Have compassion not censure. They may not have the good fortune to have a resilient temperment or an upbringing to develop it in their life. Just another way of looking at it.But I am glad your post helped some people. Tools come in different ways and forms.

        • Thank you for pointing out that someone who belittles another person who becomes bitter to survive pain when he/she is the one inflicted the injury to begin with IS kicking someone when they’re down- I lived it.

  2. I agree with the Moon. If I were to pick a planet that is related to bitterness it would be the Moon. Maybe even Pluto!

    I only said Saturn in my other post because my father was reaping what he sowed over decades.

  3. “A number of people postulated that Mars in hard aspect to Saturn denotes bitterness. I disagree.”

    Strictly in the birth chart, yes I disagree. Its all good in the birth chart.

  4. Hi..

    Being in a position over 8+ month of intense *Status-quo*, life has taken a toll on some level.. Marriage if ever was on the rocks, is asking for to go in separate ways.. Wife is truly angry, bitter, and feels life’ll never change..

    I on the other hand believe that bad days are over, life is changing, and will bring better days beginning this week..

    We both are Aries , and I’ve reached to a point where each one of us praying let today be the day, resolution comes in favor, and there ‘ll be a goodbye for good..

    Anyone with that feeling..? <I am looking to leave.. She is wishing me to leave;-)..Just that my departure depends on invite from others and that’s the real thorny issue..

    Thanks

  5. I really enjoyed what you had to say Heather.

    I agree that it’s probably some type of a Moon/Mercury problem. Negative feelings because a person can’t let a thought go. The only bitter person that I know of was one of my childhood friends grandmother. We made a promise to each other to not let the other become bitter and wind up like her.

  6. I think since mars is in this position its squaring my natal Saturn… pretty much I’m festering inside. Can’t sit in one place too long. Feel bitter, angry, discontent and uneasy. I almost never feel anger so there’s something to this!

  7. Lots to think about here! As this is being discussed Saturn is sitting exact on my Asc. Am also thinking of the topic re Neptune / Venus Elsa posted up a while ago, about having things taken away. The person I’ve been feeling particularly grudging against got to be like my sister, then when life started to go well for her I was dumped basically. I do feel bitter that I let her in, in the first place. I felt a bit used. So maybe it’s a bit of everything! Will think more on the Mercury also, I wonder I should make a clean break as it does feel like a new time is arriving slowly and who needs the baggage, really. Need some Zen!

  8. Forgot to say thanks Elsa for following this up and everyone posting on it. Learning lots, is always good for the soul ; )

  9. My mother and my ex both have a Cancer moon. They both are incredibly bitter towards their mothers because they felt neglected & denied the proper maternial relationship. They hold grudges once they have been crossed. They are both fixed. She’s sun conjunct mercury in Taurus. He’s Aquarius sun & mercury with mars conjunct saturn in scorpio. I think the crabby moon holds the emotional wound and they are both too fixed & stubborn to let go. He has heavy pluto (all the above plus scorpio ascendant, mars & saturn in the 1st house, & moon 8th house) so he tends to get revenge. His stinger is deadly.

  10. OK. then I got a new idea why I’m bitter person. I have
    1) Moon (Scorpio) exact opposed my Saturn (Taurus).
    2) Venus (Leo)square Neptune (Scorpio).

  11. I’d agree with some of the above commenters. Bitterness to me seems like a function of helplessness mixed with a sense of unfairness. The world is unfair to them (in their minds) but they have no power to create change, so bitterness sets in.

  12. Things are peeling off, I can make sense now of Libra 11th Hs / 12th House, Mercury in Pisces, Neptune / Venus hard aspects and Aries Moon. Person concerned is Taurean Sun opposing my Neptune rising in Scorpio.
    I am thinking of A Poison Tree by William Blake –
    I was angry with my friend:
    I told my wrath, my wrath did end.
    I was angry with my foe:
    I told it not, my wrath did grow.

    In the poem the foe dies from the poison, in this case its perhaps more the death of the friendship – which I now realise happened in real terms more than 10 years ago! Yikes what has this done to my psyche, I gotta move it!

  13. I believe bitterness always results out of an illusion, therefore people with hard Saturn and Neptune aspects can become very bitter if they don’t have any Jupiter to make them try again.
    I would not assume that people are bitter in general but specific transits will create a tendency of bitterness in life.
    Cancer can be very bitter (moon) if they face hard Saturn transits or natal Saturn aspects—but Saturn has to be involved as well.
    Also when Saturn makes a hard transit aspect to Moon or Venus, some people with already challenging aspects will tend to bitterness, but can also overcome it later.
    In general a Moon/Jupiter will always have a more positive outlook and overcome challenges easier but if moon also faces hard Pluto or Saturnaspects, it can create a manic depressed personality.

    Venus/Saturn/Neptune –because of the big illusion and wasted opportunities to live a REAL relationship. You watch all the others who can while you seem to just dream and reject everyone (unconsciously) who could offer you the very love you’re seeking

    Moon/Saturn/Neptune—Childhood issues, sometimes because of a sibling that seems to be more loved, more intelligent, more attractive.
    Life’s unfairness because your parents couldn’t offer you a better education, more love, stability. Not being able to feel grounded and nurtured inside a family.

    Sun/Saturn/Neptune—Not able to keep up with own expectations and ideas. The self image can regularly be destroyed by outer circumstances that make us face our vulnerability and limitations. Others seem to have better circumstances, better reputation, contacts while it seems that Sun works harder and more disciplined without receiving the same appreciation.

    Saturn can also be replaced by hard Pluto aspects—it is just a more aggressive energy and probably not mere bitterness, but hate and grudge.

  14. I always associate Saturn with the taste of ashes in my mouth (figuratively speaking). Saturn’s been grinding back and forth over my Moon/Venus/Neptune in Scorpio for a good while now. I also have Saturn/8th square Neptune/5th in my natal. My rose-colored glasses have been not only shattered, but ground into the pavement.

  15. I wanted to add that probably Saturn can make one bitter and resigned tending toward self pity while Pluto creates a selfish, cruel, manipulative personality who begins to destroy others because of an instinctive survival reflex crisis triggers in them.
    Pluto is very instinctive . You kill or die. Saturn becomes anti-social and depressed.
    You won’t experience a mainly plutonic person who is merely bitter but hard-line self-serving because they think they have no choice. Pluto is very animalistic like “if you’re weak, you will go down” resulting out of the same experience.
    That’s one reason why Pluto hates weakness. It means the sting of death for them. Eat or be eaten.

    • I disagree!
      Plutonians frequently protect the weak. Er…they are represented by an eagle.

      And Saturn types are the very last to feel sorry for themselves. Hapless, maybe. But they tend to feel responsible for whatever burden they’re made to bear.

      I don’t usually challenge what people write, but this is stated with authority and I feel it’s highly flawed.

      • YES! Agree!
        I am a plutonian, although my ascendant is ruled by saturn, pluto is my final dispositor. I have gone from one pluto transit to the next my entire life.

        My life revolves around helping people, protecting people and working for ‘the higher good’.

        I think that people who hate weakness, have a weakness they are ignoring themselves. Life is a mirror, whatever you are putting into the world, you have inside. As within, so without, as above, so below.

        • Ok. I have hidden the whole group who are making me uncomfortable on Facebook including my ex best friend and million dollar house owner. I also delved into Liz Green’s ‘Neptune’ and although not pretty to look at, I see that altho its my Neptune her Sun,its her Saturn, my Sun! Meaning I actually left the friendship first by getting marriedin her eyes, so she bided her time. So. We learn, we keep moving and try to let it go. Feeling lighter!

  16. In my mind, bitter is total frustration – the “not fair” comments ring true with me – at the perception of working your ass off for something & doing WHAT YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO DO and then, for whatever reason, god, fates, the next door neighbor, you don’t get it. Sounds Saturn to me.

  17. I meant when Neptune is involved as well (hard aspects) because in unreleased form it creates a victim position. Neptune in my opinion is the first step because bitterness results out of disappointment and the feeling of deprivation and disadvantage.
    And Plutonic people aren’t all good and can be pretty anti-social. Of course, the good ones use their authority and power for good but in my experience in unreleased form, they can be brutal and highly self-centered. I apologize if I’m wrong, it’s just my perception.

  18. Isabella,Heather, right on. I feel it. It’s like there’s a power inside, and Ter has no control over it’s behavior. And, it’s all okay.”there is a sense within that it is okay, whether or not movement happens, it’s the movement of thought thinking as if it’s boxed up and needs space to expand, becuase ther’s peace and acceptance if your open enough to just listen. Then life is moving from its own dictates, not a me moving from your agenda (as an example). These are so different. When you look at the change that can occur, you can see one person inspiring thousands and 10 of thousands. One person say (Ghandhi) with a single vision kicked the most powerful nation in the world out of India, actually convinced them to leave. Violence couldn’t have done that. “Your’re rotten, you shouldn’t be here” wouldn’t have done it. The British would still be there. But there is such power in seeing this Truth. Activity flowing from truth has such potential. Every other motivation for movement, for action, is bitter-sweet violent. Mysteriously, the movement doesn’t happen for a reason. It’s just the way life happens to move through you. You might be a Gandhi type of gal/guy who is moved to take some sort of action. Or you might be like Ramana and say, “It’s all the will of God, so why get involved?” Then the mind always wants to say, “Which one of these is right?” And ya usually choose based on your perconceived ideas of which choice is right or good for the world. This is a deception. The mind doesn’t know. Just as life can be an oak tree, a pond, a rock, a lake, or a car, it can be a very active or very passive life, all of it coming from the same source. Do you feel it, sometimes? I think it’s a great spiritual practice to turn on the TV and listen to the guy you hate or bitter against, the one who triggers you most. When you can see God or ThyRock there, you’re getting it. If you have to turn off the TV every time you see the person, and s/he sends you into skyrocketing anger bitterness, you have a lot of waking up to do. Namaste

  19. I have mars/mc/saturn in scorpio, so I’d consider that a hard aspect .It’s in sextile to my ascendant/venus in capricorn and square to my aquarius sun.

    Basically for me it has meant I have to work hard to get what I want, but… I always get what I want because I am more than willing to put in the effort. I am willing to sacrifice almost anything to obtain my goals in life. I have known bitter periods in life (the world is not fair is my dark place), but then I recuperate and realize it’s up to me to create my own world and I am free to place in my life what I need/want. I am a strong believer of fate and destiny and am convinced things will always come to those who are true to their heart and open to give and receive.

    Mars/saturn can bring hardship, but in this we learn, through tough times we learn to appreciate the smaller things in life. When I lost everything, I started to see the beauty in a falling leaf, in a bird flying the sky, in a blooming flower. This I will never forget, no matter what I obtain in life, it’s the small gifts that really matter most.

  20. I think bitterness is static and indurated, sort of loike a toxic gallstone. Can’t easily be dissolved or eliminated, and worsens with time if not expelled.
    In that sense I

  21. oops – must’ve hit the wrong button?
    Anyway, wanted to say that to me bitterness seems more like a Saturn issue of not being able to let go.
    Mars is more like action, anger, heat, movement or explosion (expells toxic hairball).
    I’d say lack of Jupiter (movement, expansion) would keep the bittereness festering.
    Seems there is sometimes an obssessive quality to bitterness, but don’t know what planet makes a person go back again and again to something painful. Perhaps people who feel guilty “want” and to be punished? Or maybe people who are more comforatble in a victim role. (But both are punishing themselves in bitterness)
    Anyway, it is being STUCK in a bed place, not being able to move on. A static situation – Saturn-like.

  22. Geesh. I have Sag/Mars square Vir/Saturn exact (28°). I also have Moon conjunct Pluto exact (19° Leo). Frustrated, exasperated sometimes. Angry sometimes, like really angry, sorta like a volcano erupting. So I think you’ve nailed it, Elsa. I too am disciplined, and highly critical of myself, but in my younger years I recognized my propensity to be cruel when frustration or hurt feelings overwhelmed me and my Scorpio Sun assisted with control and understanding. Bitter? No. Not that I can ever recall.

  23. Well I think the analogy of bitterness is extremely insightful Heather. It puts a proper spin on things. Ive been guilty of bitterness. Youve given me a great tool to heal with. Bless you!!!!!

  24. I have Mars square Saturn and my natal moon opposing Saturn and I’m extremely bitter towards both my parents for being unable to love me and for the pleasure both took in being cruel to me. They both had/have Mars in positive aspect to Saturn.

  25. People who have personality traits that remind me of either of them, I instinctively distrust and avoid.

  26. But only now since Saturn’s been transiting my first house. Prior to that, I was drawn to people with those qualities.

  27. I have mars sextile Saturn in my natal chart. I don’t think im prone to bitterness. I am prone to frustration though. Bitterness is a waste of my energy. I think mars Saturn likes some efficiency. And bitterness is not efficient.

    If I had to venture a guess about an aspect or placement that would indicate bitterness I would guess moon in hard aspect to Saturn.

  28. I have natal Saturn conjunct Sun and Moon, and I don’t recollect ever feeling bitter, and have always felt optimistic about Life in general; I have felt anxious, depressed at times, and almost despairing at one point ( mainly due to eldest having an addiction problem for several years), but bitterness – no, never; perhaps the fact that the conjunction is in Sag., in 3rd might have something to do with it ( and Jupiter in 12th – “The Cavalry’s coming!”). I also have Neptune, in Scorpio, in 1st – things are rarely as simple as blaming this or that planet for behaviours/attitudes/feelings, I have found, after 2 Saturn Returns….

  29. I have the Mars – Saturn opposition and do not relate to bitterness. I can feel blocked at times, and I definitely alternate between feeling courageous and fearful. The main traits are tenacity, doing what needs to be done, self-motivation and hard work.

    As for bitterness, I have witnessed this in my MIL..(lol, cliche I know). She has Saturn square Mercury and a Mars, Pluto moon conjunction. Her temper is ferocious and her self pity insatiable. Constantly blaming anyone but herself for her life’s woes, plus never feeling or displaying any empathy or love towards others. Full of spite and jealousy, she is one bitter……
    I pity her.

    • Its very difficult watching someone who is in this self pity mode. I have been freinds with a dear 84 year old neighbour who was the kindest neighbour I could have had when I first moved into my home 8 years ago but wondered d why her son who lives locally never went to see her. fro various reasons she was placed unfairly into a dementia unit and forgotten by her family and as her neighbour/friend I began to visit her regularly but over the past 3 years now her obsession and judgement about how others are always to blame has surfaced to the point of making it very difficult for me to listen to all the time and if I try to explain or change the subject she gets quite belligerent. There are often many deep reasons for this which they refuse to examine but sadly such people really do make their own bed and create the loneliness of their lives with the toxicity of their thoughts and words.

      • It is such a shame, particularly in your case where the dear lady did express kindness. The negativity tends to consume, and therefore makes them unavailable to enjoy the present moment/company. When people back away, they just add them to their blame list. These situations really highlight the necessity to try and keep our thoughts positive and not get caught up in a web of negativity as it can turn into a self fulfilling prophecy.

  30. Thanks yo for your words HM For me it has been a lesson in keeping Love but setting my own boundaries and learning to be able to switch off and not take it personally but still visit when I ‘feel’ up to it. We have a moon conj mercury and venus trine pluto between us. It’s had been a big learning curve also for me to see the anger and projection from her son and his wife who have power of attorney over her life and goods yet they accused me of seeing her to ‘get something from her will” This I find sad that others a)project their own stuff and B) fail to see unconditional kindness and caring with no agenda only to make her life a little more bearable having been moved without consent to where she is and under very dubious conditions. A government inquiry is looking into the conditions of people living in Aged care homes in Australia at this moment.

  31. “..a lesson in keeping love but setting my own boundaries and learning to be able to switch off and not take it personally…”

    Excellent strategy, patricia 😊.

    The amount of people who only interact/connect with others on an agenda basis astounds me. And of course they just can’t fathom how genuinely caring people can exist.

    Yes, the government inquiry is long overdue, but a step in the right direction, for sure.

  32. I do have my Mars in hard aspect with Saturn (opposition); actually, my chart ruler (Aries rising) is in hard aspect with some major players Saturn, as mentioned above; square with Jupiter/Pluto (part of a Jupiter/Pluto-headed T-square). I also have Moon (Taurus) and Venus (Scorpio) opposing each other yet in good aspect with Saturn (11th) (sextile/trine respectively). I can relate that whenever I get bitter from all the hard aspects, I tend to suppress my bitterness (Saturn, I suppose), and try to balance my own view (after all, my Venus is in Libra-ruled 7th house).
    I can’t deny that I am bitter most of the time (dominant Scorpio/Pluto in my chart, despite being a Sag), but I am too aware of it and such awareness makes me feel worse. Sometimes I wish I could turn a blind eye to it and be as single-minded in my belief as a Sagittarius could be, but I guess Saturn is there, doing what it does in my chart for a reason..

    • Saturn is not “doing” you or your chart anything:)

      The natal chart is just a dynamic map where we can see indacators to our character and inner life etc. The planets does not rule over you or your life:)

  33. Bitter spit out,great medicine of thought;tired yet encouraged another day to be part of.To best way you can steer thru,Tired rest , sad watch a sadder movie than your story anxious breathe deep angry chew some baby carrots will get rid of those clenched teeth,happy Saturday

  34. I am reminded of a saying I heard from a young real estate agent who was a Salvation Army officer and a very kind one to me which helped me when I first came to this city. After having coffee one afternoon while I was living in a hostel and feeling pretty sorry for myself, she said it was good to have a little “Pity Party” for yourself but try to think of one good thing each day like for me personally my excellent health or the fact that I was sharing a coffee with someone who cared enough to spend some time out of her busy schedule to do this with me. Just small thoughts of gratitude really can make a shift if you really want to change. Your mercury or moon placements can give you a hint as to how you can stay mentally and emotionally stuck.

  35. Yes, amongst chaos/crisis finding small stuff to be grateful for is gold. Ironically, when I think about it, it is the small stuff in daily life that provides me the greatest joy. Nothing better than a cat on my lap, an ocean view or a smile from a stranger.

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