A number of years ago when my son was about twelve years old, we were having trouble communicating. I literally could not hear what my son was saying. Maybe he talked too fast or he mumbled? My husband could hear him just fine so I went to the ear doctor for a check.
I was expecting to learn I had hearing loss; the ear doctor expected the same. We both surprised when my hearing tested perfect… or rather, I had no hearing loss or problem. “Really?” I said.
“Really,” she said. “I think your son is messing with you,” she added. I looked at her with my eyes wide.
“He may be playing with you. Tell him you went to the doctor, your hearing is fine and communication is a two way street”.
Confused and maybe a bit skeptical, I went home told my son what the doctor said. He has the family poker face and Mars in Scorpio, so who knows? He also has Mercury in Jupiter in Aries, opposing my Mars and Mercury in Libra Family signature, right. Mars Mercury. So maybe this was a joke. If so it got played out. We haven’t had a problem since.
Today, Mars in Virgo (Mars Mercury combo) is opposing Saturn. Mercury is opposing Pluto and sure enough I just told someone who keeps mailing me to STOP. Why? Because I don’t understand their emails. I mean, over and over, I say, “I don’t understand”.
Now, if this is because I am stupid, then I am stupid. I am certainly not playing around. This is my job here… I will respond to your email but if I don’t understand your email, my response is going to be, “I don’t understand”. What else could it be? And if you send me two or three or four more mails I don’t understand, they answer won’t change… well, yes it will. I will ask you to stop emailing me, because what is the point?
I had another gal email me about a report she bought from me in 2017. She lost it. She wanted me to resend it, which I would be happy to do. I did not know who she was (no name) but I had the email so I searched my sent mails and also my orders on the backend of the site – nothing.
I told her I could not find her order and she became irate. Basically, never mind you pos! I wrote back, stating I did not know who she was; if I had her name, I could search… well you get the idea. It’s more important, I be a registered-in-the-courthouse, bitch, because of this.
In contrast, I had a client yesterday, on the fly for sure. Her initial email was hard to parse so I asked for clarification before I did the work, after making the wrong assumption. She apologized and clarified.
I did part of the consultation, leaving time to come back. She came back and did not like my work. She was measured but it was still like, wtf is this? She has Mars squaring four planets in Scorpio, including Pluto so you can imagine. I understood how she felt.
I finished the consultation, clarifying my message and explaining why I wrote what I did, rather than what she felt she asked for? This ended really well. VERY WELL. So it’s not the heat that causes a problem. Communication really is a two-way street.
I have another client, we get on the phone and yell at each other. This is our personalities, but also, I have more than one client that yells, truth be told! This is also fine. Some people get fired up when they’re talking about something that is happening to them; this is totally understandable. Yell on the phone, I won’t bat an eye. You sound like my sister or my husband or something, so no problem!
Another scenario – a person will constantly probe me. I respond but they really don’t like anything I say. My message is rejected, misunderstood or twisted… something. What’s the point of this? I mean, I’m pretty mutable and there is no doubt I try. If my responses are unsatisfying, why continue to solicit them?
I think this is the perfect day to think about this stuff. Communication and boundaries, basically. Bottom line, if you’re having trough communicating, the problem may be on your end.
Do you feel you’re a good communicator? Where’s your Mercury?