My Boyfriend Lost His Appetite For Sex

Elsas feet in the waterHi Elsa,

I’ve been seeing this great guy for a little over a year. At first, we had a healthy sex life. But for the past few months or so, he hasn’t been coming on to me. I asked him what the problem was, and he said it was my anatomy. I’ve tried buying Kegel products to improve my pelvic floor muscles, but it hasn’t helped.

He seems to have lost all appetite to have sex with me, although he still watches porn. Is there something wrong with me or him? Also… since sex means so much to guys, will he love me still even if he doesn’t get pleasure?


Dear Worried.

In four words, RUN FOR THE HILLS! The odds that there’s something wrong with your body is zero percent. This guy has a problem and if I tell you a story about someone else, maybe you’ll be able to see it.

I once dated a man into lingerie. He spent a fortune on me, buying me various things on a weekly basis. It was fun for awhile – a long while actually. But after some time, something shifted. I started to feel very much like he was more interested in the underwear than he was in me. It unnerved me.

Then one day I woke up and he told me he was going to sleep apart from me. You know why? My toenail has scratched him in the night. I’m serious. And this was disturbing his sleep.

Well, I’ll tell you something. I didn’t clip my toenail. I left that guy a day later, because it wasn’t about my toenail, was it? First, it’s a toenail crisis but had I stayed, what would he have complained about next… the strands of my hair? My breath?

I felt like you do right now. I felt repulsive. And I don’t know exactly what was up with my guy. And I don’t know exactly what it up with yours. But no one has ever complained about my toenail since, you know? I suggest you leave this guy. Do it tonight, if you can.

You asked if there is something wrong with you or with him. Answer? Him, him, him, him.

Go and don’t look back.


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