Black Moon Lilith in the 7th House – Scrying Mirror

smoke and mirrorsIf you have Lilith in the 7th house of your chart, her themes will manifest in terms in terms of relationships, partnerships, and objects of pursuit. The “other” in your life will take on a distinctly Lilith flavor.

In the 7th house, we meet the people involved in giving shape to our journey to know ourselves. Everything present in the 7th house is present in our own being, but often manifests in the form of other people. With Lilith in the 7th, your partners will be those who live out your own pain and fury for you. They force you to either own your darkness or live in impotent outrage. They hold up a mirror to your darkest self. You often find yourself so angry and disappointed with them when you are really furious about the injustices that you yourself have faced. But until are ready to own them, you will continue to pick partners who remind you.

This is part of why, in traditional astrology, the 7th house is known as the House of Setting. Here is where the Sun sets, and here is where things we cannot or will not absorb into our own being cause us to come undone. With Lilith in the 7th, your partnerships will be your weakness. This can be as simple as being a sucker for a certain type of appearance or as all-consuming as sacrificing your own life and happiness to meet your partner’s whims.

Finally, Lilith in the 7th house is unknowable. Think about what a lifelong process it is to come to truly know yourself. With that in mind, think about what an impossible feat it is to truly understand another person. With Lilith in the 7th house, you will struggle mightily to fully grasp the scope of your own pain. And because if this, you will likely underestimate your ability to cause pain to others. Yours is a very sharp knife, and it is absolutely imperative that you learn to wield it well.

This placement is so complex and could be a book in its own right. But if there’s one thing I can leave you with, it’s this: Your pain is your own, and you have a lifetime of exploration ahead of you. In the meantime, welcome the partners who challenge you and make you uncomfortable, within reason of course. The more you are willing to engage with and understand their darkness, the ore you will come to understand your own. And then, finally, you can begin to find peace.

Do you have Lilith in the 7th? What is it like for you?

I specialize in helping people understand and work through Lilith issues. Want to know what Lilith means for you? Click the link to consult.



Black Moon Lilith in the 7th House – Scrying Mirror — 17 Comments

  1. I have been looking forward to this. I have this natally in Pisces, and very near descendent. It leads to very unsatisfactory relationships, often with a massive element of sacrifice, and never managing to satiate either myself or my partners. Life always seems to be incomplete…never managing to quench thirst/hunger/sleep/emotional or physical needs. Funnily, while I think I meet selfish people, my closest partners accuse me of the same, so it is indeed a mirroring of some sort. I am yet to come to terms with my impotent rage, and wish I had the key to solving this very important part of my chart.

    • I have this same position in Pisces also. Its hell – married 30 years to a man full of rage – I suppressed my anger as he was acti ng it out physically, verbally, emotionally. I have never had a truly satisfying relationship, always third parties – ghostand flesh and blood.

  2. Great article, and it’s shed so much light on my own placement, I have bookmarked it!

    One question, how do I reconcile a 7th house Lilith, with a North node in Libra? Seems like a large karmic ask there ?

    • I have the same issue, with a very loaded 7th house with BML, Mars and Uranus, North Node in Leo and Pluto and Moon in Virgo. BML has finally led me to give up on intimate relationships, but the NN leaves a painful feeling of failing to accomplish my purpose.
      Thanks for your brilliant articles Midara.

  3. Lilith in the 11 th, not sure I another
    Willing to always consider another’s
    Pain , mine is enough. I find my attractions start with the eyes the space in between words, the curling of r’s the throaty way to pronounce
    Shoulders chin , don’t we all come with pain? I d rather consider pain shading like working with charcoals and can’t keep my hands from smudging strokes into smoke
    I guess I listen but I prefer pain to be expressed in the eyes, not that I am uncaring just, can’t let anyone or better said any more thoughts of pain
    Just the eyes please

  4. The last man i datet had his Lilith in the 7th, conjunct mine, in Aries. I was a game changer he told me. I’m not sure if this was true. In any case, it was intense and some boundaries were crossed, i said no. He didn’t fully respect that. So i got out of there.

    • As the kids at work helped me to post the above link from my clipboard, the hostess sat my first table, patio 3. Just by coincidence it was an american man and an attractive 30something Filipina. The avalanch of textbook Castaneda omens related to my half Filipina would-be gf with 7th house BML conjunct descendant continues…

      • Correction: The above subject’s osculating apogee aka BML is not conjunct the descendent but is in the seventh house at zero degrees Aries.

  5. I have BML in the 7th Leo. I see this now in my dating years of long ago the monster in the mirror is handed to me in the last argument-the breakup argument. Outrageous harsh and ugly truth! Black and white thinking dominates and sometimes there is finger pointing. I think my pride has won out over the love at that point and I turn on my heel and go not looking back. It seems so harsh and contrary to my Libra Cancer nature but it’s true. When the door hits me on the ass they are dead to me. And I lick my wounds for a long time.

  6. I Just learned that I have lilith in the 7th house in the sign of taurus for me. and it explains so much, I have experienced alot of trauma in my childhood and growing up i never had alot of friends as a young adult with 3 young children i find it harder to keep friendships i think being alone for a few years just me and my kid might be a good solution for me.

      • Wow my 7th house is in Taurus and I have lilith in my 7th house as well and am only 17. And have experienced the worst of the worst of failed friendships time after time again. Even now, the one friend I have I feel has a different agenda. Also have trauma and a very complicated family dynamic.

  7. hello there,

    extremely interisting lilith knowledge there!
    I am interestedin synastry reading from you Midara with lilith interactions. How to proceed for it?

    thank you and congratulatioin for your work!

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