If you have black Moon Lilith in Libra, your pain you’ve felt from your Lilith placement has made you graceful and diplomatic. You’re learned to be a consensus-builder who can find common ground with anyone.
However your Lilith wounds have manifested (which you can determine based on the house your Black Moon Lilith is in), you have become an expert peacemaker. You’ve been asked to confront competing interests and unreasonable people so often that it feels like you’ve been running a daycare your entire life. You don’t understand why the world can’t just be fair. All you want is for people to get along and exhibit the tiniest bit of grace. But instead you’re left playing the diplomat, trying desperately to keep everyone from each other’s throats. And in doing this, you no longer have room for your own feelings of anger or frustration.
In fact, there isn’t room for much “you” at all. The weight of others’ needs and expectations seems to take up all the oxygen in the room. In order to feel secure and in control, you’ve had to disguise your true self under a sheen of acceptability and poise. You have found that beauty, pleasantness, and grace are all powerful armor, and you’ve been wearing them ever since. You often feel like a doll on display, but at least it keeps you safe.
But even when you try to remove your protective gear, the pain persists. When you try, even for a minute, to center your own preferences or to assert your individuality, you are questioned, belittled, or dismissed. It’s like the world has a vested interest in making sure you can never stand on your own. And over the years, you may have learned to question yourself too, feeling afraid to make decisions without other people’s input and approval. So you’re stuck feeling like a preschooler who has to use the buddy system to go to the bathroom, or like someone who is permanently required to be the back end of the horse costume. You’re never allowed to just shine on your own. In this way, you have bought harmony at the expense of your own independence.
But it doesn’t have to be this way. To help soothe this pain, lean into the energy of Aries, Libra’s opposite sign. Aries is fiercely independent and highly motivated to get what they want. That’s because Aries understands that they only have this one life to live, and there’s just no point if you can’t live it on your own terms. Aries recognizes that while pleasing others is great, it doesn’t mean much if you aren’t happy too. Aries also knows that peace isn’t always all it’s cracked up to be. Some things are worth fighting for. YOU are worth fighting for. So what if it ruffles a few feathers? People can tend to their own needs. Aries has a life to live.
While there is obviously so much to say about this placement, I’ll close with this: I am so glad that you exist. As you build a world for yourself and the people you love, your grace and warmth will be the foundation that ensures people are treated fairly and with kindness. Just remember that your needs and opinions are every bit as important as anyone else’s, and you’ll find your way every time.
Do you have Black Moon Lilith in Libra? How does it feel?
I have black Moon Lilith conjunct my Ascendant in Libra. I was always the diplomat growing up in a turbulent family because I couldn’t stand the fighting. Its true. I made personal sacrifices for the sake of peace.
I do have Mars/Neptune conjunct in the 1st house, though, so I have my limits before I start hitting back. I always try to use the higher vibration of Neptune to temper a Mars response.
BML in Libra 9th house intensely aspected (squares my Cancer Sun and Mercury, sextiles my Leo Venus and Mars). Not only I’m the diplomat in my family, but I also hate competition and wish for a peaceful coexistence. In my case, the trauma was deep, as I had to break a relationship up due to ethnic and cultural differences and the lack of approval from my family. I was too young and stupid (had I known what I know now, I’d have married him by now), but my Lilith tried too hard to keep the peace. My current partner has Mars in Aries, though, and he’s been inspiring me to stand up for myself.
Wow this resonates with me so deeply with Lilith Libra 7th house
Pluto 7th House Transit has been a blessing. It was the straw on the Libra’s back… I’m becoming a selfish lil maniac and I love it.
When you’re calm, graceful, patient, and understanding… but still somehow end up being the bad guy.. no, the worst guy, in the eyes of all who look & listen to the talking heads…
It’s time for a change.
I have black moon lilith in libra in the 12th house along with Pluto and am only now starting to wrap my head around this placement that makes so much more sense to me than any other placement in my chart…
It’s sickening how much I’ve done for ungrateful people just to keep the peace I have sacrificed so many opportunities just to not rock the boat or make people feel bad but all they do is make me feel bad for having my own needs they expect me to be at their beck and call night and day just working to make sure their lives run smoothly while I barely have my own personal space to love my self and accept my self and breathe. I really am going to harness Aries energy and be selfish now I’m tired of putting everyones needs above mine. I matter too… I matter a lot and people should cater to my needs now