Are Astrologers Biased?

bi·as [bahy-uhs}
noun (plural bi·as·es or bi·as·ses)
1. preference: an unfair preference for or dislike of something

I just finished a written consult for a gal with a young child, headed for divorce.  I told her how she might turn her situation around.

I have a bias towards staying in a relationship rather than leaving. I am cautious around situations like this because I’ve seen that the grass is not always greener on the other side. It’s easy to go from the frying pan into the fire.

Consequently, my vote that you to leave a relationship is very different than a vote from someone who believes the answer to everything is leaving.

There’s a clear benefit to the client to know which way an astrologer leans. This argues for hiring an astrologer off a blog like this. My opinions, attitudes, values, etc. are all over this blog.

How do you feel about the idea of hiring an astrologer who is not a blank slate?


Are Astrologers Biased? — 42 Comments

  1. I actually choose who I consult with (astrologer, mentor, colleague, etc..) based on their opinions, attitudes that stem from their EXPERIENCE. I like that the consultant is a “specialist”.

  2. I’ve only ever had readings from people whose work I’ve read and admired. And I look at a lot of it before I decide, so I can get a handle on where they’re coming from. So no, I wouldn’t hire someone who appeared to be a blank slate.

  3. I’ve somewhere in the newspaper here Dubai that there are some people esp women who considers or uses astrology or horoscopes as a therapy. The article says it is now consider an alternative therapy

  4. I place undue emphasis on lunar stuff and I think every astrologer provides a different service based on their tone, their emotional tone.
    Some are cold with an undertone of emotionality. Mine is someone who can understand failure and self sabotage and be sensitive to it. Mine is good at talking people down

  5. Wow, what a morning wake up to read this with comments from old-time Elsa ‘friends’ I’ve missed for a long time!

    I agree with Lupa and Kash and especially, Kri. “Mine would need to be good at talking people down.”

  6. Relating, for me, I’ll take someone who shares their opinion, gives me a break from myself.Therapy , I assume , is trying to get to the problem and work out of it.since we all have different problems, receptivity important.Healing may be court maybe not.
    I think at this point,in my heart,
    Court expensive and no one really has time to care, for me it was the only safe option,like breathing
    Gotta do it.Noticing how many are part of our world Huge.
    I too loved my part in a marriage
    But , again for me, better breathing
    And not married than married
    And nearly suffocated.

  7. No one is a blank slate…And most biases make sense or are based on real experiences…BTW, I have found that most seasoned astrologers and psychics have your bias, because it is a sensible one.

  8. Honestly, after having hired you for a consultation and experiencing this bias, I was not happy with the reading. I had worked with you before on differing topics and it was very helpful, but this topic in particular I found that you are not only too biased as to not be able to present a balanced perspective, but you also made A LOT of assumptions about what was happening in my life based out of this bias that completely turned me off.

    IMO when a person is asking someone to read their birth chart, they don’t want your personal bias. They want a clear and concise reading of the energies at play in their life based on the planets and their placement. Period.

    So for me, I would not choose to work with someone so biased on one topic again if that was the one thing I needed to understand.

  9. I like the idea of knowing someone youre putting faith in to give you solid advice is going to be of strong moral character. I could not put my faith in someone who didn’t prove this first. When you’re trying to make a life changing decision that could lead to unintended consequences you want someone who is not going to take that lightly , so of a serious and responsible bent, yet also open-minded and flexible enough to step outside their own biases.

    • I definitely can step out, as you say. But as you get older and realize the profound repercussions of the mistakes you made earlier in life; not just what it cost you but the price others paid, you do learn to take things like this very seriously. Because later in life, when all you have is a string of bodies behind you… well, eventually you just have to live with it.

      I exist (in part) to counter the people who encourage others to leave their relationships at the first sign of trouble. All that does is lead you to repeat.

      This might not be apparent when you’re 30, but when you;re 50 or 60, it’s pretty clear.

      As my husband says, people dig in a shallow circle, round and round as opposed to digging deeper. Scorpio moon.

    • See, I think advising people on whether or not to leave a relationship is risky. And I think it’s unfair to put the decision onto someone else…it’s a way to avoid responsibility. I think it’s important for someone advising to assist the person seeking help to find their own answer within. I think people sometimes just need to feel empowered to make any choice whether its to stick with what youve got or leave and following your heart should always be key. Finding out the persons values and helping them figure out what kind of life aligns with those values….stuff like that. I strongly feel that (anyone) should tread carefully when advising people either way. The choice should be uo to the individual seeking advice, they should feel empowered to make their own choice and live with whatever consequences come from it.

      • Well, I don’t know that this is what I am doing.

        The gal prefers to keep her family together. I explained how she might be able to do it. The things I could see that she was doing that were harming that cause or helping it.

        We also just may not agree. Some people live for themselves and that’s fine. But other people live for others… which is also okay to do.

        • Oh I wasn’t saying that’s what you were doing, sorry if it came across that way. I was just on a soap box lol. I have talked to you about my own relationship issues and you did do a good job..definitely asked the right questions.

  10. I also think people gravitate towards the experience they want to have. If you want to stay married, you’re apt to contact someone like me. Usually, not always.

    Because sometimes you run into a Saturn figure who is wrong. They exist so you can become your own Saturn figure and stand against them.

  11. One more thing…

    Sometimes it takes a number of years, or even a couple decades to realize you made a wrong turn.

    I’ve had this experience myself when I decided not to marry (my current husband) when I was a teenager.

    I had no clue what a bad decision that was – at all – for more than twenty years. I am a SLOW learner. But eventually this was revealed to me. I really wish someone had intervened in my case.

    Everyone is free to act on impulse. I have Mars conjunct Mercury in the 9th so I know. RECKLESS.

    But these days it’s really easy to find someone to tell you to take the easy road, as opposed to the harder road that will take you to a better place, long term.

  12. Well, noone is completely objective. Everything is filtered through our own conditioning/perspective/experience.

    I think this is a good thing to understand this about other human beings. It saves a lot of transfer of blame for responsibility, to understand that people are always presenting their own views and belief system. Noones going to undermine their own beliefs. They are true for them.

    But i think the healthiest thing to do (at least for me), is to be able to try someone elses thought processes on for size, especially if that person is happy with their life. At that point its your prerogative to keep a portion of it, or all of it, or throw it out all together.

    Then theres no reason to be unhappy when someone doesnt deliver what you want. If their intention is benevolent, then what else can you really ask for?

    And as far as astrology goes, its an art, thats based on science. When i get a consultation im asking for astrological expertise but im aware that Im dealing with a unique human being. Thats why there are so many different astrologers. If you dont like what the unique artist has to offer then theres many others out there. Theres Monet, theres Picasso, and theres Michaelangelo. Dont go to one, if youre looking for another. You cant box in people like that.

  13. It seems that there are those that will be dissatisfied when they do not receive the counsel that best reflects their own personal views. This is particularly true in the present day throw-away society. Marriage takes WORK! It isn’t all butterflies and rainbows; and if that’s what people expect, they will naturally be disappointed. You are 100% correct Elsa, as usual, and I, for one applaud your candor and honesty in your approach to astrology!

  14. I have Uranus rising and Venus in Aquarius so I often think of leaving a situation rather than staying if I find great resistance in others or too harsh circumstances. Most of my friends now are what I call ‘stayers’ (they stick around when things get tough as they know humans and relationships have ups and downs) and I get their counsel in certain respects when needed.

    One of them has Venus square Uranus and one time, like 3 years ago, she gave me a relationship advice that mirrored our urge to leave. Luckily I was in therapy and my former therapist helped me see that I was actually not seeing things clearly nor my boyfriend’s (now husband) position. She said she couldn’t mirror my view of wanting to leave, and I soon saw why she was saying this. She helped me ‘stay.’ I was having a saturn transit to my venus (a square.)

    And I have consulted Elsa a few times whenever (in love or work situations) I have wanted to ditch things and move on when difficult things and people appeared. Although I didn’t like to hear her take on things (as it didn’t mirror my urge to leave – which I wanted her to confirm, I’ll admit, like with my former therapist), I did (and do) see her as a Saturn person as in both cases I was having saturn transits to personal planets (mars and ascendant respectively.) It was important to work hard and manage my struggles.

    It ended up being really helpful, her advice. I’m glad I stuck around in those situations.

    Everybody has biases. It is human. Some of us, because of our jobs, need to be aware of them to bracket them as much as possible when helping others find their own voice/power. Sometimes I have to talk to a client about a previous session where my bias got in the way and I explore what that was like for them. So important to repair and own stuff when it happens.

    Anyway, as I have gotten older I have learned that it’s good for me to reach to people who will have a bias to stay rather than to leave as I am plenty of a leaver myself, and it’s key to compensate a bit for that energy of mine. I also find my sun square mars sides with my uranian energy so it’s key to rely on others so I can contain my impulsiveness (and urge to leave difficulties or blockages at once) until I realise how I feel and what I need or/and want.

    Anyhow, Elsa’s bias is a supportive one in my case as my experience/perception (could be wrong) is that her approach is to try and work things out if they are no real deal breakers (which, in my opinion, she is great at helping with – helping people see what is a real deal breaker and what isn’t) in situations/relationships.

    Long post. Ending now.

  15. I first consulted with Elsa when my son’s father left me for the 5th time due to his cheating ….. she threw me a lifeline that I held on tight to. Consulted with her a couple times after our initial verbal consultation and she kept telling me that not letting go of what his father did was holding me back. She was very correct. I have consulted with her a few times since and I like that she throws her life experiences in (and her hubby’s). The last consult finally got me to release a burden I had been carrying for 40 years. Imagine that. I hadn’t told a soul (except those involved in the situation who never discussed it) and I ‘confessed’ to Elsa, a woman I have never met, via writing in regards to what I wanted to talk about in the consult. She told me what I had to do. I did it. I was set free. There was a reason I was met to find this blog and her. By the way, Tabula Rasa is inked on my right palm. On my left is Memento Mori. I am eternally grateful to Elsa for being as strong as she is and telling me what I didn’t like hearing. She will laugh because she knows that in Corinne’s world as she says “it’s your way or the highway.”

    • Thanks, Corrine! And I want to tell you, I share your story with others, as an example of phenomenal courage and amazing grace.

      So you are anonymously inspiring people, down south. I am talking about my real life. I saw a 77 year old man she’d a tear over you. I’m serious. This happened.

      You are a force of nature, babe. No doubt about it. Your courage moved than man to tears.

      • *blush* Thanks, Elsa! All one can do is try and keep trying. Hard to believe that I’m inspiring anyone but I will take it! Tell that 77 year old man I’m doing great! No more tears! There are bumps but I’m navigating them much better knowing what is awaiting me. Also, thank you for referring to my work/career choice as ‘Mother Teresa’s work’. That was such an honor to hear. I keep trying to get out of this field (it’s exhausting in every way) but because I am totally blocked at every which way, I’m trying to accept that maybe this is what I’m supposed to be doing. Oh, and if the 77 year old is single, I’m moving. 😉

  16. Everyone has their own opinions about things. I don’t see that as bias, just different viewpoints. That’s a good thing, IMO. I like to consider all viewpoints before deciding what to do.

    I’ve been married for 43 years. There were a couple of times I could have thrown in the towel, but I didn’t. I stayed and worked it out. We healed and our relationship is better than ever today. We have such a strong bond and we’re very close.

    Marriage takes a lot of work. Its the ultimate commitment. You’re going to go through hard times sometimes. You’re going to see ugly things in your partner and yourself sometimes. You have to forgive sometimes. Each time you go through the hard times, you heal and reach a higher plateau in your relationship.

    No matter who you decide to have a relationship with this happens. The grass is not greener on the other side, its just a different lawn.

    There are times when divorce is the right answer. There is no reason to stay in an abusive relationship, but if you have a decent relationship and feelings for each other its worth it to work on it. Relationships change over time.

  17. Nothing wrong with anyone having a bias, just don’t want people bashing it over my head. Or if someone expresses a bias, at least do it in a respectful way.

  18. What does the group say about a long term marriage (24 years) that offers basic security and friendship, but in which the couple has grown far apart over time, and each party has developed widely divergent emotional and practical needs, lifestyles, values and beliefs, that are no longer able to be met in the context of the existing marriage? (This couple does not have children together, by the way). Would parting as friends be appropriate in that case, to free up each to live in their own respective way going forward, and possibly to find fulfillment and joy down the line in a new relationship, or is sticking it out together no matter if both feel incompatible always the preferred course? A good friend of mine is facing this dilemma, and has asked my advice. Since the discussion is relevant here, I am interested to know how others might weigh in.

    • Meetings one’s key needs in relationships of any kind is important, I think.

      Age, stage of life where one is placed (e.g. retirement age, youth…), security needs, freedom needs, cultural factors, and personal insecurities are some of the factors involved in why people stay or go in relationships.

      Tough decision, that of your friend, and a personal one where he or she needs to take responsibility for choices, needs and decisions.

      Best of luck for them!

    • Well if they break up then they are sure to not get their needs met, if they dont find another relationship. Theres also a fallacy that its easy to find a relationship after a certain age. At a certain point i think its best to just work with what you have, as opposed to throwing it all away and hoping for something better. And security and friendship are not things that should be taken for granted. There are plenty of marriages without either of those.

  19. Thank you for both responses! Reasoned and wise in each case, to be sure. Although it is quite true that it might not be “easy” to find a good relationship, especially at a later stage of life, I am not sure that the fear of never finding one should be a reason to remain frustrated in an incompatible marriage. Having faith that someone else will be put in your path if that is intended for you, no matter what age you are, or even that life could be made fulfilling in other ways besides being in a marriage, are also viable life choices. But yes, at a later stage of life there can be practical considerations that outweigh purely emotional ones. So my friend definitely will have to consider carefully the long term consequences of any choice she makes, and be prepared to live with her decision, whichever way it goes. Again, thanks for the input!

    • In any case, the person is really only asking for more information so that they can make the best decision based on their own desires. All you can do is present your point of view, but beyond that theyre going to do what they feel will make them the happiest

  20. I am newly divorced,5 years from start to now, it is a process. Married for 35-38 years if you include divorce time.
    I am reflecting how sad for me that I put so many things on the same line or page as now my desires for intimacy stand alone with respect
    And my senses.To any worried or on tough terrain listen and look for when you are at peace,good luck and I do believe there is plenty of time and people to make it right ,no expiration
    Date on love

  21. As an astrologer who’s been married for over 30 years, I completely agree Elsa. So many people give up on relationships far too easily. At least every seven years, every relationship faces major challenges. Couples who work through these issues then move on to experience a deeper and more satisfying connection. Then the next problem comes along … That’s the way a committed long-term partnership rolls.

  22. I agree that relationships go through cycles and sometimes it just takes holding on and working through them, but having said that, I would be careful about being so quick to judge and shame people who supposedly “give up far too easily” when a relationship legitimately might need to end for the well being of both people involved. I would venture a guess that most people who feel compelled to end a long term marriage or partnership do not do so lightly or frivolously. Ideally it would be a mutual decision, though unfortunately one person sometimes wants out when the other doesn’t, and that is so sad for both, because then either the person who wants out but stays sacrifices themself by remaining trapped in a false life, or else they leave and then the other person is bereft and heartbroken. But if after sober deliberation both people come to the conclusion that they would be better off living their own lives separately, I don’t think they should be looked down upon as quitters. People who once loved each other may choose to part, but that doesn’t mean they throw each other away.

  23. As an amendment to my comments above, I just want to add that in considering whether to leave a relationship or not, I do think it is important to take time to self-reflect and see if there are inner wounds or emotional triggers that may need healing first, before making a final decision about the relationship. Otherwise, one is likely to get out of the relationship only to repeat the same pattern with the next person. It is also possible that working to heal one’s own inner wounds might inspire the other person to do the same, and help uplift and transform the relationship mutually, and for the better. But if after honestly undergoing that process, and then still finding that the relationship is simply emotionally dead or empty or unworkable, then in that case I would advocate having compassion for a person who felt they needed to extricate themselves from that relationship.

  24. Wow, I never realized how many things l… I was going to say “were wrong” but I actually meant to say “were not right” in my own marriage because I had never been married before, I was so young when we got married and I didn’t know what it would or could be like in any other way. I was just so Catholic too. I still am, but I was just trying to be a better wife and not even thinking that maybe he fell short in whatever he was doing or failing to do. And then with my current relationship, I don’t know what to call him because I don’t plan on having any more relationships with other men, and yet I’m in my late 40s and I feel stupid saying boyfriend about someone who is over the age of 25 or being someone who is and calling a man my boyfriend. And partner just makes me feel like I should be square dancing or same sex with a person so I usually just say his name. We met before I met my ex husband but I was about to move to another state. So it took us two decades before we actually ended up together. And now that I have been able to experience the joy of someone who loves me that much and… Let’s me know that, I don’t really regret the way I have lived my life except when my mother throws it up in my face and I really don’t like that but it’s a complicated situation and what isn’t is the relationship I’m in, so many things are awry in the world and in my own little life but that is not one of them thank God.

  25. I once ordered an astrology e-book from an astrologer who was very clear about her dislike of Mars-Neptune. The book was about outer planet placements and it covered all possible aspects between inner and outer planets, but not Mars-Neptune! She left these out on purpose. I happen to have the combo and wanted to know more about it. Well, i stopped following and reading her work, obviously.

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