Am I Too Old To Have Children?

moon vintage Christmas ornamentHi Elsa,

I know the moon, 5th house, Cancer etc are often related to children, conception and the like but I as a Capricorn, I’ve noticed that anything to do with my “womanhood” tends to follow Saturn. I got my first period a few days after I turned 14, first significant (mature, committed relationship) at 21, major shake-up and shattering of delusions regarding “bad men” at 28, first real strike me down with lightening love at 35 . . . you get my point. I’m turning 42 next week and don’t at this point have children.

My family and friends predominantly think I’ve missed the boat. Am I naive to think that 42-47 is when I have children? I’ve been late all my life with key “women” things (relative to other women I know) so why should this be any different?

PS: I have a stellium in Sag including mercury as well as Neptune + Venus conjunct so I concede that I may be unrealistically optimistic and delusional?

Saturn Fan

Hi, Saturn.

I think everything you wrote is correct.  Your friends and family are correct when they tell you that many ships have sailed.  For example, you can’t be a young mother!

You are correct in thinking you could have a baby, late in life. This is true up until menopause.

You are also correct in seeing that you’re prone to believing that anything is possible. Possible does not mean probable though, and you can see this as well.

Since all this information gets you nowhere, I think you’d be better off to ask a different questions. Like these:

  • Are you sure you want a child at this stage in life?
    Having a baby places demands on your body.  Keeping up with a baby and then a toddler is also demanding, never mind getting this kid through twelve years of school, just as you’re slowing down.Also, there are also a lot of risks for both you and the baby.
  • How will this be for the child?
    If you have a baby at 47, you will be in your mid-fifties when he or she starts school, and most likely menopausal.  Your child’s peers with have parents in their 20’s.It’s also worth looking ahead, thirty years. As a Capricorn, the last thing you want to do is be a burden to your children.  I would think about that as well.

These are very serious considerations.  And it might be easier for you to accept being childless if it’s a conscious choice you make, rather than seeing it as something you missed out on.

I also think it would be good to channel these feelings in some positive direction.  I am sure there are many ways you can contribute to and support the younger generations.

Based on what you mentioned of your chart, it sounds as if you’re naturally parental.  You don’t necessarily need to have a baby to find expression for this energy.

Good luck!

Have a question? Ask here – please include your city or country. This keeps things interesting!

 

 

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Comments

Am I Too Old To Have Children? — 44 Comments

  1. I too have experienced the same thing and I have come to the conclusion that no matter what anyone says, you intuitively feel what’s meant for you in this lifetime aside from all the human conditioning and ego based statistics. Your destiny is in your hands and the hands of the Universal Force not in the limiting and restrictive thoughts of humans. Live your life and love every moment and what is meant to happen will just happen.

  2. I disagree on one point: many, many women nowadays have children later in life. Depends on the location and type of school the child goes to, their peers’ parents may also be older. Especially in more upscale schools.

    • Oh, but I agree on every other point 🙂

      Yes, I think it’s very much tied to the economics. My friends who live in smaller towns all had their children early. The cost of living there is lower, and don’t discount the (grand)parents who are able to help more if you stay in your hometown. In a large city it’s much more typical to start a family later. If you have the means, you’re seduced by all these options for your career and having fun. Otherwise you try to make a living and save some money for the future.

      • So to finish the thought:
        Not only trends reverse, some trends aren’t universal. This one I think never made its way to smaller places. But it most definitely is this way in the larger cities. How do you imagine it can be reversed there?

        • When trends reverse, it’s typically, the people in the larger cities that lead the trend.

          As for how, things fall out of favor all the time. Remember the muffin-top? LOL.

          Having babies in your forties is a fad, that has already peaked, as far I’m concerned. So few men are into it.

  3. Hmmmm….
    My friend and I were/are talking about babies, we are mid to late 30’s.

    We both said… We don’t want to be too old, because it’s so taxing on your body, and then there is money. I mean going back to work is much harder when you’re older, after having kids.

    I have Capricorn and Sagittarius stellium, I would love little ones around me forever. But I gave myself a time frame: No kids after 35; I mean .. if I start having at 33 then sure another one at 35 and that’s it. Just not start after 35, I need to be realistic about what I actually have.

    I’m not a millionaire nor an I strong – health wise. Sometimes, being realistic sucks. And I wish I am like those other women who can. But I’m not and I’m okay with that.

  4. I had my first child at 39. Loved him and parenting so much I had 2 more at 40 & 42. No regrets. I’m 63 with a 19 year old. My husband is 3 years younger and though we are far from wealthy we saved for retirement z

    • wila, this is great!

      I think we have many people who had their first child quite late here. I had my first born two days born two days before I turned 37 last year. My daugher and I are both Libra Suns, as many women who come from my paternal Grandmother’s (sharing my birthday) side. I think my now almost 15-months old daugher is truly the most amazing thing happening to me, and I can this is true to Husband, who is a year and half older than me, too. I also know I’m probably still pretty fertile, due to history on my mother’s side of the family. My mother is an Irish Twin, she has a sister who was conceived within 2 months of her birth. My Mother’s “Irish Twin” had her daughter (my cousin) when she was 41 and her husband in his mid-50’s without any medical help.

      That said, I don’t plan to have any more children. My childbirth was bad, due to very weak constrictions. 100 years ago, either the baby or I would have died. This actually happened to my great-grand-mother father’s side at her 12th childbirth, when she was 39.I was in labor for 24 hours, pushing for the last two hours, having a full medical staff monitoring my baby’s brain activity for 30 minutes. Unfortunately, this is something that happens more frequently to women who are old or/and overweight. You get weaker constrictions, and a more high risk pregnancy overall.

      I think late motherhood is shown in my chart too. I have a 5th house Moon in Capricorn that’s generally speaking affected. I’ve always loved children, I got my one biological sibling when I was 12, almost a teenager, and was always glad to babysit for him. But I have aunts, who remained childless, just everybody’s favorite aunts. They are Aquarius Moons, 10th house.

      So, really, I don’t think you can ignore your Moon in this.

  5. I really love this comment:

    “There are countless women who have served humanity in enormously important ways, without ever having a child.”

    I had my first and probably only at 40. In an ideal world I would have been younger would have had an opportunity for a second or third.

    I try to remember that there are often countless ways that children come into a person’s life. I know there are many women who don’t have their own children for whatever reason, but become step moms and then grandmothers. You never know. You could end up being a little old lady who lives next door to a brood of kids that hangs out with you all the time.

    Personally, I think my son might have a big family (moon jupiter conjunct in 5th) and I wouldn’t be surprised if he starts younger – so I might get to be the grandma with the big family I always wanted – but who knows!

  6. I think Elsa covered some really important points in her response. For many years I counseled new mothers. Many of them were in their 40’s when they were starting motherhood. I had had my own three in my 20’s and it made me look at how much easier it had been in every way. The older mothers invariably had had a working life when they were in control of their time and efforts. They were used to Life usually being straightforward and manageable. A new born is about Chaos! It’s a wonderful time and can be full of joy but in every case I watched these mothers struggle with having to put someone else first and constantly meet someone else’s needs and time . frame. We just aren’t so flexible as we get older.

  7. Hi Everyone! I’m Saturn Fan. Thanks for your comments and weighing in on this. Just a few things regarding my situation and how my mind works on this:
    Firstly, in answer to Elsa’s questions, yes I do want to have children and all I have done is think about “them” whilst I have built my career & $. Eg:I have been saving all my life, buying property etc for “them.” I didn’t feel it was responsible on my part to have children younger because I wasn’t financially stable enough (no judgement on those who do, I’m strictly talking about me and I suspects it’s my Cap Sun & Jupiter too maybe) and would rather chew my right arm off than accept assistance from anyone (family included).
    Secondly, yes I do happen to work with children LOL! I own my own company and it relates to children’s welfare so any maternal inclinations have been channeled into this up until now.
    For me personally, my 20s and 30s were a nightmare emotionally. A had to resolve a lot of deep deep family issues which meant a) I was not in a good place emotionally to have children and b) I did not want them coming into that sort of family.I feel more emotionally and physically healthy now than I ever did when I was younger. I look much younger than I am but of course that has nothing to do with egg quality or so I keep seeing, hearing, reading. It’s that part that annoys me the most. ie: the science.
    Would love to hear more comments as I’m sure I’m not the only one in this position. I’m particularly interested in hearing about Saturn’s role in having children as I’m surprised that the general astrology world does not talk about as much as the moon, Cancer etc.
    By the way, I was once told by an astrologer that I has a very “barren” chart because I have a Virgo Moon and Chiron in the 5th house. My Scorpio Mars wanted to sting her little mouth with venom and of course prove her wrong 😉

    • Hey there,
      my Mom has a Virgo Moon, and Chiron in her 5th House in Aquarius. Don’t listen to anyone 🙂 Ever.
      Or rather listen to everyone, but believe what you want, ha! You’re probably Saturnian enough to stay within ‘realistic’ boundaries (whatever that means) in believing what you want.

      • Thanks H. I am pretty Saturnian and realistic but have to concede that these type of comments do penetrate at some level. Come to think of it though, these feelings of missing the boat always seem to come up in a more pronounced way every 7 years or so.

    • Thank you for the honesty! Your comment: ” [I] had to resolve a lot of deep deep family issues which meant a) I was not in a good place emotionally to have children and b) I did not want them coming into that sort of family. I feel more emotionally and physically healthy now than I ever did when I was younger.” is so on point! It echoes thoughts that I have been having as I, too, am at a threshold phase for the capacity to bare children and frankly, might never have any but for a certainty I am KEENLY now aware of how much unnecessary damaged goods baggage that I could have unloaded onto any innocent progeny that I might have had in my younger days, as had been done to me having been raised in a highly dysfunctional family, erratically / apathetically led by a narcissist and circling co-dependent. Took me YEARS to figure and clear out all the toxicity of the broken system that got imprinted on me when too young to know better. Should I now bare a child, its with the utterly grateful knowledge that it will be in the form of a new, healthy graft offshoot from an otherwise diseased tree for with all the purging of the toxic conditioning, I’ve broken the chain of passing on “the sins of the father (or mother)” that, unfortunately, appears a far too rampant pattern throughout the family for generations…Seems to me that you’ve done a WISE thing in addressing that first and foremost, wise for you and ensuring a better, well adjusted future for you…and whomever you share it with…and indeed the world at large.

      • Thanks for your comments Enlightened. Upon further reflection, I definitely don’t regret having children when I was younger for reasons I have stated, so I guess what I really regret is having a shit family of origin. Not in a “poor me” way, but simply as a fact. Had I not had that family situation, I think my decision making would have been different and there would have been no reason not to have children younger. I would not have worried about the crap energy I would have naturally passed onto them. I also have Saturn in the 7th which adds to the whole time thing. I’m currently involved with a 45 year old Virgo man who is also very Saturnian and has never married or had children and wants to start a family ASAP. He’s waited this long for similar reasons but mostly financial stability rather than family stuff.

        • Again, I can empathize about the wish/regrets about not to have had to worry about the ‘crap energy’ being passed on, sans mitigation, to another generation and how it insidiously impeded what could have been a more conventional timing for having kids/family of one’s own. But hey so many DO have deep issues that hail from the family dynamics and yet do little to nothing by way of any metacognitive course corrections thus ensuring that whole new generations are born replete with people who grow up to be propelled far more by toxic thinking than well-adjusted frameworks. Incredibly, in this day and age, with so many tools available for people to avail themselves of the therapeutic means to better self-awareness/mental health, I think its tantamount to being almost a wanton criminal act to have children in such a corrupted state of mind. That being said, I hope both of us get ‘rewarded’, several times over if possible, for putting off having children until having done the sometimes perturbingly arduous task of coming into our own in an unimpeachably healthy and sustainable manner (takes GUTS to schuck most, if not all, of the template that molded you when only a kid and dare to go rudderless for a time while seeking a more wholesome kind of compass for making one’s way in the world! So many people NEVER do that kind of work as they’d rather put up with what they’re habituated to because its the easy, the familiar even though they know its not working all that well for them or their families. Again, this to me is almost criminal and I see so many of the people I grew up with, who swore that they would not become like their parents have, in fact, become the very things they feared – its like being in some personal version of “Invasion of the Body Snatchers” for all the robotic iterations that have resulted from all the fear based morphing and whenever questioned about it, their eyes glaze over or quickly changing to another discussion topic occurs most every time) So be proud of your self-work towards an authentically healthy you and GOOD LUCK! Please keep the forum posted on how things go, if you want to:-)

          • Thanks Enlightened. Yes, I agree that Saturn does always reward hard work however that’s if he really is the main factor in this which I’m in the process of trying to work out. I think he definitely has a lot to do with my situation as outlined in my email to Elsa however a few other things also ring true for me such as Catfishmass’ comments below regarding Virgo moon perfectionism. Will definitely keep the forum posted 🙂

  8. I’m 43 and as far as I’m concerned I missed the boat, or rather let it sail. And I’m good with this. I’ve seen a lot of friends struggle with parenthood. Many love it, some don’t. Those who don’t didn’t realize what they were signing up for. Some are older parents, but most were young, if truth be told. There’s no rest, they’re always on. I never felt like I was in that place and I didn’t want to do a bad job. I’m still not there. I think parenthood is a big responsibility and its better to deprive myself of having that experience than create a person in the world who is going to struggle and suffer because of what I wasn’t able to provide for them. Its my own brand of selflessness and generosity.
    Is an Aquarius moon related to not having kids?

  9. I have Saturn in the 5th house with the 5th house ruler in a barren sign. I had my only child in my late 30’s and I take my role as a parent very seriously. It was a tough pregnancy, but the birth was a blast.

  10. Hi Saturn-Fan, I just wanted to throw in my story … to offer some hope and perhaps provide you with direction (non-astrological). I had two children later in life and on my own as a single woman. I had to give up on finding the perfect fairy tale and the Prince to go with it … so I commenced with ‘Project Baby.’ I did IVF using my own eggs and donor sperm since my boyfriend did not want to ‘seed’ any more offspring. I had Gabriel just shy of my 42 birthday. At age 44.5, I gave birth to my daughter – my miracle. Doing IVF as a 43.8 year old and using my own eggs & the same sperm donor, I had only an 8% chance of getting pregnant and a 3% chance of a live birth. Everyone tried to talk me out of it … I refinanced my home and for $18 more a month, I gave birth to a strong, healthy daughter the very next May. So … it is possible (not easy, but possible). If you do decide to go for it … you need to bypass the OB/GYN office and go directly to a RE – Reproductive Endocrinologist and likely go directly to IVF. Statistics show that a woman loses 50% of her fertility between the ages of 42 to 43. I was an anomaly – my GGrandmother had her last child at the age of 49 and so some genes were on my side, plus I did 5 years of fertility acupuncture to extend my biological clock. At age almost 56, I am still not done with Menopause yet! An enormously helpful resource online is Inciid.org http://inciid.org where there are moderated message boards with women going through the same process as you. That resource alone got me up to speed on all the biological markers for fertility, decreasing fertility, bad eggs, etc.

    • Thanks for your input Julie. Strangely your comment regarding acupuncture has really struck a chord with me. I have never done this before so will look into it. I don’t actually think I’m infertile (however that could just be by Sag stellium including Sag Rising talking, especially Neptune’s placement there). I know when I ovulate every month – I get that ping feeling in my ovaries. I like hearing about people being exception to stats and science. Perhaps off topic but I remember one of Elsa’s posts (I think it was about her red trolley/pully thing) where she badly burnt her hand and miraculously it healed almost overnight if I remember correctly. It completely defied “science” and her doctor was speechless to say the least, however it was a good example of the power of our subconscious or at least that’s what I took from it. For me personally, I do believe lots and lots of things are possible that defy science/logic however I do have a fear of being naive and stupid. Just in the process of sorting which one I am lol!

  11. It seems like that Virgo moon is really the culprit here on your indecision — it is demanding a certain “perfection” of you as a potential parent. That’s the emotional yank I’m seeing — inaction until a state of perfected readiness is achieved to satisfy that old marm Virgo. I’m pretty realistic, so I’m going to throw it out there that you’ll never live up to this high bar that your moon is setting — especially if you’re hoping to redeem a crappy emotional upbringing through your moon’s possibly unattainable ideals of motherhood. That passionate Mars has to win this argument and say eff you moon, I’m having kids — because it really sounds to me that’s what you want. Also, Elsa’s question “How will this be for the child?” is perhaps the best pre-parenthood question in the history of ever — and if you can answer it and feel good about that answer, then well you have your answer. I personally wouldn’t wait until I was 47, but 42 seems totally manageable.

    • You’re on the money with this Catfishmass. I do think my Virgo moon perfectionism plays a role so it’s probably not just purely a Saturn influence. I’m conflicted by my scorpio mars. He attracts a lot of intense, plutonic men into my life which I don’t mind in the least sexually and otherwise but as father material I have to admit I’m worried as I don’t know if they’re safe. Also, men who are a few years older than I am (and those that I’m attracted to) have Neptune in late degrees of scorpio which exactly conjunct my mars. i.e.: I have difficulty discerning their bullshit. Whilst this may sound perfectionistic it’s really just a fear of having an unsafe father for my children. Sigh.

  12. I thought I’d throw my experience out there for you in case it may help. I have a strong Capricorn signature in my chart, I too have a Virgo moon and Saturn natally in the 5th house. My Cap Mars, Virgo Moon and Taurus Saturn form a lovely earth grand trine. All of the reasons you mentioned are why I delayed having kids. Worst for me was terminating a pregnancy in my early twenties thinking I had plenty of time to get myself together which at that time I very much was not! I could not support myself at that time and all relationships family, friends piece of dirt boyfriend were a collasal mess. I very much like you NEED to be able to take care of myself and at that time could not much less anyone else. I have always been very aware of the responsibility that goes with having kids so it was never taken lightly. By the time I reached about 33 I realized my clock was ticking pretty loudly I was in a much better place all around and my partner and I decided I would stop using birth control. We have not ever tried to get pregnant just haven’t prevented it. He has kids from previous marriage so we took the perspective that if it happens it happens if not we have the wonderful kids he brought with him to the relationship. As of today I am 45 and have no biological children. I have made no attempts to prevent becoming pregnant and I enjoy a healthy and regular sex live with my man. There is no known biological issue for either of us. I have gone through times when I really really hoped it was finally time. But now I believe if it is intended for me it will happen if it is not intended for me then that is what is best for me. I have a happy life filled with people whom I love. I try to focus on my life and what is the best expression of the chart I have and when I am not sure I take responsibility for either way it could go and let things come as they do. An additional side note regarding Saturn my partner also has Saturn natally in his 5th house. Double dose of restriction in the house if children might be part of our storey of not having children together but it could also mean a late life baby….I’m truly at peace with either outcome.

  13. I think you should pray about it. My child is almost 2. I have a lot of Saturn and waited till my first SR to make the decision. It is a lot harder than what I thought! But I am the happiest mother in the world now that I have this little light in my life. I realize now how self oriented my previously life was, having a baby changed that for me. It’s good to have someone else to tend to, I think it has changed my character completely. Everyone in our life was wondering if I would be a good mother, and in am always getting complimented or really back-handed complimented that I AM actually a good mother, HA ha. I totally embraced it tho and let go of a lot of the negative sides to who I used to be. I probably couldn’t have done that at 21. People see that I have changed a lot and it’s really shocking to them, Scorpio Saturn with Pluto on the ascendant baby! Just needed that little Capricorn push to my aries moon to go through with it.

    • Interesting JB. Yes, ultimately I think it is simply a decision. Whether it’s consciously or subconsciously somewhere a decision has been made one way or the other. I had a friend who had a termination when she was younger and when she was in her 30s she decided she wanted to have children but couldn’t fall pregnant. Eventually she had therapy which included hypnosis I think and discovered she had subconsciously decided not to have children to punish herself for the termination she had all those years ago. She had not been consciously aware that she carried so much guilt about it.
      I will give this idea of decision making some more thought. Thanks.

  14. Hi ajm. My friend’s sister had her first child naturally at 45 and another friend of a friend who thought the child boat had long sailed had her first naturally at 51! So, these things do happen. The more I think about this topic the more I think it has to do with our subconscious programming/blocks etc rather than just pure biology.

    • Yep I totally agree that’s why I realized I needed to release the need to have it one way or the other. Sometimes hard to do for us Cappy types LOL

  15. Hi Saturn-Fan, Just wanted to give you my astrological background around the baby issue: Sag ruler of the 5th in late degrees; Saturn in Cap in the 5th house. My astrologer told me that my first baby showed up in my chart like a job promotion (Saturn was transiting my 10th house, ruled by Taurus) and my son was born a Capricorn! With my daughter, my astrologer was not convinced I could have 2 kids, but Elsie Rose was triggered by Jupiter transiting my natal Uranus in the 12th house – Uranus is ruler of baby #2 (7th house) in my chart. Elsie Rose was born (a Taurus) when Jupiter was transiting my Ascendant. A glory year! Oddly, the children and I all have Leo Rising and within 2 degrees of each other! I too, remember Elsa’s quick healing and agree whole heartedly that the mind/body (unconscious blocks & enormous power) play into biological scenarios in a big way. For both my pregnancies & IVF attempts, I was doing major prayer/meditation & imprinting intention via quantum-physics of the manifestation of my desired outcome. I painted, I prayed, I planted an entire garden by hand (‘Fertility Garden’) including a lawn seeded in November and many, many trees. It took a while to get there since I had to come to terms with using a sperm donor. It was only when I finally embraced that as the blessing it was, that things moved forward. My daughter’s pregnancy was pure intention to the universe. I simply never considered anything except a YES – in spite of the odds. In that cycle, miraculously, they retrieved a whopping 30 eggs from me when the norm at that age (43-44) was 2-4 eggs in an IVF cycle. Like you, I never had known fertility issues – just no willing man, which is why I sought out help. I quickly learned that having a normal, fertile body was no guarantee since age itself is considered ‘infertility’ in the world of assisted reproduction – I stayed away from the terms and boxes and always thought of it as my fertility journey and kept it in the positive. Another striking example of odd-defying achievement was my elderly mother, who was down with terminal uterine cancer at age 83 and given a year to live with or without treatment. Mom also defied the odds and beat the terminal cancer, was called ‘a miracle of the spiritual sort’ by her oncologist/surgeon (‘and we doctors do not say such things’). Although my Mom was an atheist, several of us were doing intentional prayer/meditation for her & I nursed her with cancer-killing foods/supplements and pulled rank and modified her ‘Gold Standard’ chemo schedule (which was killing her) such that she had a chemo holiday between treatments to allow her immune system to recover. She had chemo every 6 weeks instead of every 3 weeks … but mostly, my Mom never gave cancer any energy/focus or power … and the cancer (which had metastasized to an ovary at time of diagnosis) disappeared. In the end, Mom passed away from a UTI which got out of hand within hours and shut down her system. Ironic. She beats the cancer, but succumbs to a garden-variety infection when no one was watching. Anyway…longwinded, I thought I’d share some of the backstory. If you do decide to go for it … I cannot recommend strongly enough that you work fast & get aggressive from the outset. When I asked my RE who that woman was – that 8% who ‘won’ at IVF at my age (43.8) – she replied, ‘high responders’ – meaning, women who produce the most eggs since you lose some at every stage of the IVF process (egg retrieval, fertilization, petri dish growth over 3 days and transfer). I innocently asked, (already knowing the answer), ‘Am I a high responder?’ to which she replied, ‘Oh, Julie! You are my highest responder…’ to which I laughed and said, ‘Got ya! Will you cycle me?’ since, at that point, my RE was not committed to working with me at age almost 44 (which is the cut-off age for IVF using one’s own eggs). Flustered, she said, ‘Oh, you are very, very stubborn! Okay. Yes, I will cycle you.’ And the rest is history … or as RE said at my first ultrasound, ‘Patient knows best!’

      • I wanted to comment since I am older than you and still have not given up on the idea of being a parent (one way or the other). I am a Capricorn Rising with Sag Sun and moon in Scorpio. I think that older women make better and more patient mothers. I work with children and have been a caregiver for my elderly mother for over 7 years now. Caregiving is so much like being a single parent… it is ironic that many people do not get that connection. I think that it would be best for you to start exploring and go for it. You cannot plan out the whole future… just take it one day/one step at a time.

  16. Yes, I am too old to have anymore children.
    But, not too old to have more grandchildren!
    I found out this week I am going to be Grandmama again 🙂

  17. I think the difference between older women who can handle raising a child despite their advanced maternal age comes down to individual stamina.

    I am 45 and don’t have half the energy level of certain women I’ve known in their 60s. I didn’t have their energy at 25 come to think of it. As far as I could tell, with their natural vigor and hyper personalities they probably could have handled twins at their ages.

  18. I accidentally found this thread while I was reading another article and I love it! Today it’s not so unusual to have children over 40… more and more women chooses to do so, especially if they don’t have a steady partner, they can do it on their own.
    I’m 46, Libra Sun, Gemini Asc conjunct Saturn, Moon in Virgo and 5th house cusp in Virgo with Pluto in 5th.
    I always thought I would get married and have children, that was the picture in my head. It didn’t happen, due to a lot of things. I became single at 40 and had an emotional crisis for a long time. Then I tried two fertility treatments two years ago at 44, which were unsuccessful. At the time I decided to go for it, I was sure that it was possible and it was what I wanted. However, after the treatments I had to go for a small surgery and then I was in a dilemma again… I became stressful every time I saw myself as a single mother without having help and support from my family, who live in a different country. So I didn’t go for further treatments. This issue of becoming or not becoming a mother is very interesting…
    However, I’ve now come to the conclusion that I don’t want to have children on my own without a partner…

    @Saturn fan: it seems we are the same age! And as it seems, you have also Virgo Moon, like me. I’m curious to know, how is it going with your “child project”? Did you succeed in becoming a mother? 🙂 Looking forward to hearing from you…

    @Julie: thank you for your long description of your and your mother’s process! I think it has to be a big YES before going for motherhood… and it’s not happening when one has doubts about it…

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