The Secret Lives Of Virgo: They All Have Them!

sophia loren 1979Speaking of the secret lives of Virgo, disgraced politician, Mark Foley is a Virgo.

So is Michael Jackson.

So is the very clean Hugh Grant… who was caught cheating on his model girlfriend with a whore, Divine Brown. Whoops!

How are these for examples of secret lives?

And don’t go jumping on this because there are other, classier examples. For example, Virgo, Sophia Loren. Years ago when a reporter yelled at her, “Hey Sophia! What are you doing with that old man?” (Carlo Ponti)

“None of your business!” she yelled back.

So there you go. Some Virgos are aware of their secret lives, others delude themselves.

For example, Leonard Cohen, another Virgo acknowledges his secret life in his song, “In My Secret Life“. He does it again in another song, “The Future“. But the Mark Foley types are far more common. I mean, he’s an extreme example but this is the point:

Virgo likes to see themselves as innocent maiden do-gooders. The men as well at the women, this is. So they just deny all the heinous things they do which are easily as numerous as the rest of peeps in the zodiac.

Virgo’s cheat on their taxes and on their husbands and wives. They act like punks just like everybody else in the zodiac and just as frequently.

But you best be careful pointing this out to them because by and large they won’t like it. Virgo wants to be flawless, see. So they project the Pisces, the sign opposite, the sign that knows everything is askew away from themselves. And this has an unfortunate affect, obviously.

The really smart Virgos embrace and even covet their secret life. And these are the Virgos who have tremendous appeal. Like Sophia Loren.

Isn’t she always pulled together? Look how she presents. Perfection! She’s a textbook Virgo (Virgin). Can you imagine her showing up for work with with her hair messed up from last night’s sex? Forget about it! She’s a Virgo!

But she doesn’t claim sainthood. Obviously she’s drawn to the old man and has been since she was 15. So what do you think they’re up to? Hmm. None of your business!

Compare to Foley who takes a public stance against what he does in private. Ack! That’s bad Virgo.

So what about you? Come on Virgos. Speak! Do you have a secret life or not too sure about that? And what about the Virgos the rest of you know. Do you notice they deny the things about them that are not “pristine”?


The Secret Lives Of Virgo: They All Have Them! — 220 Comments

  1. It occurs to me that people usually think I’m unmarried (divorced twice!) and have no kids (I have one). They treat me like I just got out of college. People think I’m younger and call me “Signorina” (Miss) instead of Signora (Ma’am) at work. I turn 42 next month.

    Virgo rising. Haha!

  2. Interesting discussion! To say that Virgo has a dark side certainly suggests a lot more depth than the stereotypical puritanical maiden. Virgo sun here married to a Virgo moon, I have noticed that an awful lot depends on which house the Virgoan planet falls in as to how this ‘dark side’ manifests. For example, my sun falls in my eighth house, intercepted. I have discovered that I can be quite a dark horse to others when eighth house matters are provoked. The chocolate box veneer certainly loses it’s gloss! My husband Virgo moon is in the twelfth and certainly remains a mystery to most!

  3. Spinner- me a babe and you a flirt? ::bats eyes demurely (Virgo rising) then shoots a look to curl your toes (Scorp Sun)::

    This gets me thinking. Knowing someone’s chart can feel like peeking into their panties.
    Elsa, maybe you can post this question and see what people think. Do you think you have an unfair advantage by knowing someone’s chart? I have no fear asking people’s birth data and check them out all the time. Every single guy I’ve dated has to give that info up from the start. Co-workers, family members, too. I get a good idea of what makes them tick. What does everybody think?

  4. Pixie Dust- I think I will need new shoes. You know the kind that they wear in a thousand and one nights, or Arabian nights? I have no problem with you looking at my chart as long as I can look at yours.

  5. I think you are spot on here, Elsa. I have Virgo rising, and I’ve been surrounded by people with strong Virgo influence all my life.

    Personally, I can say I have a natural ability to hide my innermost feelings and thoughts. The thing is, I used to hate this ability, because most people just didn’t seem to realize how deeply I felt about certain things. This lead me to overact in order to get the message through to people I cared about, often with disastrous consequences.

    I only began to see the ability to keep up appearances as a blessing a couple of years ago, during a rough break up and a Jupiter transit to my Ascendant. Since then I’ve realized the great potential of this influence in professional life and rotated towards people who have better understanding of my “secretive” side. For instance, my current significant other is a Rising Virgo too, and while it took a lot more time to reach the same level of intimacy with him than it did with a Rising Pisces ex, the process has been less painful.

  6. Another of the blogs that I read when you posted it but didn’t absorb until much later. Thankfully, that last comment popped up in the recent comments on the first page.

    I have Cancer sun in the 11th, but Virgo AC conj Pluto/Uranus in the first and aspected all over the place. Secret lives? Bet your ass.

    Like other’s here have said, service is my gig. I present to the world as … well, Apple Pie Mom. lol But let me tell you something: there is a helluva lot more going on beneath the surface than most people know.

    Highlight of re-reading this? Sophia Loren’s response in the main blog. Weirdly enough, it fits exactly with my life right now, and it’s the perfect answer to those who ask me the same thing they asked her. Much better come back than “I have daddy issues.” LMAO

  7. As a virgo this made me blush abit. Have merc-uranus conjunction in the 12th house and a fair few of my friends do not know anything about my interest in astrology, reincarnation and karma. The conjunction squares my saturn in 9th house – everyone knows I love to travel and learn about religions/philosophy etc but my own spiritual philosophy is only to be discussed with a chosen few. One person knows I read this blog and that is how its staying 🙂

  8. i agree with spinner and bella here. i’ve got 3 planets in virgo and i have a few private sides that i keep to myself – i mean, i choose who to share them with if anyone. when i consider sharing, i am looking for a person who’ll be receptive to what i’m going to say. it doesn’t mean they have to agree, it just means they have to be open-minded enough for me to think the conversation is going to be worth it/interesting for me. otherwise what’s the point? ok, shocking people is occassionally fun too 😉

    there are lots of ways to define ‘secret’. doing things that betray your partner’s trust – not cool. sharing parts of yourself selectively – totally fine.

  9. Virgo/ Scorpio Rising “Oh no! You know my secrets!”

    Heh, I admit that I (and maybe most virgos generally) act like we know more than other people sometimes. And I think most of us keep getting told that we’re so pure and nice (despite being obviously *not*) that maybe eventually we start believing it.

    It may be true that I’ve sometimes believed I was hiding things when people could see through me, but far too often I’ve felt like I had no skin and everything was visible. Nasty, horrible feeling!

  10. Coming back to this a year later, I can definitely say I have more of a handle on Virgo now. Having Virgo Saturn (conjunct Sun-Merc), there’s a lot of things that I keep hidden unless, like venusflytrap said, I know they have an open enough mind and won’t blab to everyone and their second cousins about it. I’ve always ascribed that to the major Pluto action in my chart, however.
    Plus, since the split, I can also see how a lot of this is/was reflected in my ex, who had a Virgo moon-Saturn, something I couldn’t interpret until far too loatefor it to make any difference whatsoever.

    By the by, is it Merc retch? I’m making far too many typos… unless it’s the tequila talkin’. *lol*

  11. I think Virgos are cursed. Their main problem is that they KNOW too much. Probably stuff that no one should ever know.
    -A virgo with an aries moon

    • Not always cursed, but they do have a hard time adjusting, they don’t seem to fit in, some of them are artists, some of them rejects, not much self-confidence, some self-worth though. Too smart for their own good yes. Virgo with gemini moon and pisces rising.

  12. “Sorry virgos, you’ve been busted!!! Have fun….”

    Wow! I am a Virgo and you don’t need to bust me because I will always tell you the truth, if you ask me. But I will not volunteer with information on my life whether it is bright or dark side. I don’t like speaking about myself. I was born that way and maybe many other Virgos too. We all are only people and we all have some dark side. If you have something against a Virgo, then confront him in a friendly way. It might change your opinion.

    Let’s love each other!

    • wish we could love one another, theoretical more than real (at least to me). I’ve seen more people hard on virgos than otherwise. Good to confront them, usually they are friendly if they sense you are. Thank you Zavela.

  13. That is true, we do tend to know to much at times because of the questions we just have to ask to get or have the full details of things. That would be our nature.
    Virgo sun, Taurus moon, Virgo venus, Cancer rising.

  14. My dad has Virgo Moon and hates it when you point out his annoying little obssession about people’s little/big physical scars! Don’t get me wrong, I love him because he’s my father, but sometimes I have to speak out about how his quirks annoy me or else I’ll go crazy!

  15. I read about the first 30 entries…I am a Virgo with mars, mercury,pluto, and sun there.
    I married two Libras(Venus n libra)..I also gave birth to 2 daughters that are Libran..I do not take well to Libran men..too indecisive and looking for mothering to me.My mom was a libran and she deserted me young.I was raised by my father and wicked step mother..
    I was thinking about this post today…I have as an adult survived cancer, sexual abuse(as a child),abusive husband,jail,custody cases, blah ,blah.

    I have been told by Elsa and others I am not a typical Virgo..I am blatently Honest..been celibate for years while raising my 5 children by myself and had 3 vegetarian restaurants…

    I remeber at college my best friend was my buddy to go downtown with (she was my astrologial twin born 12 hours before me so we had the same rising sign and a VIRGO).We would go to the Bar and I would go to get drunk and she would go to get laid!She always did and I always passed out ( PISCES MOON)
    We were in our young twenties before Our SATURN return..
    WE are 2 virgos at 52 she has already had a face lift and still looking for the perfect man and i am old and wrinkled planting vegetables and opening a farmers market co-op…

    I have never been a liar and never cheated
    Got neptune conjunct ascendant so i bet you do not understand what i am trying to say>>>>>>>>

    Grandonna laughing!

    • I can relate to you (I’m 70) hard life, wicked stepmother, pisces rising. Alcoholic mother who died when I was 10, I never drank. Not an angel, but act like one most of the time. Thank you for your post. Does my lonely heart alot of good.

  16. Elsa I have been a single mom for 24 years and been thru.. Been reading here for a while ..never posted but always read..What is wrong with your daughter? Knowing I am a mom and cannot imagine what u been thru..What is wrong with her?
    Do u mind sharing?

  17. This is a cool thread. As a virgo I can definitely say I have a secret life… probably some combination of not feeling understood and trying to be normal… Its not so much wanting to keep secrets as feeling parts of you are not public appropriate… sigh.

    This is not same as honesty. I am honest but can also read people and sometimes choose to be kind over honest.

  18. Hey I agree. People sometimes assume we are snobs just because we don’t like to share everything with everyone. And since we’re quite transparent, people guess that we actually are hiding something. But the fact is, like you said, Virgos just feel a part of them are inappropriate for the public and then we thought of as having secret lives.

    Just as it’s natural for some people to broadcast their life everywhere, it’s natural for Virgos to hide:) That’s not dishonesty.

  19. I have to agree with VirgoAries on that. I don’t think so much that it’s a secret secret for us, it’s more that it’s just our private life and we are shy for the most part. It may feel inappropiate for us whereas it may not feel inappropiate for a Leo so therefore they may be more public about their life.

  20. Hey thanks for agreeing fellow Virgo Book-N-Street Smart, it’s always nice to know there’s someone like you out there:)

    And haha yeah. Leos can go all out declaring their crushes and pretty much their life. Like you know, people tend to think of us Virgos are cold/prudish or whatever, but I get a feeling Virgos think about sex the most hahah. And I can’t even imagine me saying this to my friends, they’d be stunned considering my external image.

    And I’m pretty sure they’re not interested in knowing what I really think all the time when all I’m thinking is how HOT that Pisces guy in my class is and the wet dreams about him lol.

  21. secret life, oh yes. Even at a psychic reading, I wouldn’t reveal the actual details of what I did. I just told her, “you know about my secrets, right? The stuff I do for a hobby?” Then after she nodded yes, I asked her the question.

    See, I was that intent on not revealing those details, yet I still may want advice from time to time from others.

    If that’s Virgo-like, count me as August 25.

  22. As a virgo, I think we are the madonna/whores of the zodiac. Private? yes. Misunderstood? yes. I just think our outsides don’t match our insides. I know I look provocative on the outside, and yes, I’m provocative on the inside, just don’t hit on me as if you just got out of jail. Respect. Treat me like a lady, and I’ll be the bad girl you want.

  23. “Accepting Imperfections” (#28) – maybe you might want to re-think your name – that was one of the most mean spirited, un-accepting posts I’ve read here. yuk.

  24. OMG..! That’s so true about Virgos. Not sure about the virgo women though but My Virgo ex(Sept 10) was deceitful, full of talk time, weird , was obsessed with his ex and was unable to let go. He was still in contact with his ex while being in relationship with me. He was a pathological liar too. Always talked about stuffs which he didn’t really meant actually. So so manipulative .He was always gloomy and negative. I will never ever date a virgo guy again ..

    My virgo school guy friend (Sept 5) was the biggest womanizer I’ve ever seen in my entire life. He was always running behind the fire sign girls. Lol.

    My Virgo professor(Sept 14) wow what to tell about him..He was married with 2 children with a very good carrier, but guess what? He cheated on his wife and she left with the children. Now he is living alone but have tons of other women by his side.

    They all have had narcissist tendencies.

    All astrology sites claim that Virgos are loyal and honest… lol.

    • This is all true. I married Virgo man, and he is one of the most passive aggressive narcissistic men I have ever known. Worse than Scorpio.

      He is secretive, deceitful, liar (even when caught in the act of something)
      He has a porn addiction, and lies about it. Sex is terrible. Cold, detached and robotic. It is all about HIM. His work, his family, his this his that.

      As long as you admire him and give him lots of ego boosts, he is somewhat ok. He is basically a very insecure little boy who pretend that he is all that. He ain’t. I will be hopefully getting away from him soon.

      Virgo men will trash your self esteem and are very manipulative.

      I have dated many of them in my time and I am getting old. Never ever again. They come on very charming at first, then the next thing you know, cold as ice. And no emotions, all flat, clinical and unfeeling. Then they have the nerve to criticize you for being a warm empathetic human being.

      It is truly unreal. I have grown to hate them. They are not human.

    • Yes! It’s like virgos idolize their ex-girlfriends, even adding traits that weren’t even there to begin with. It’s definitely uncomfortable when you are with a man who still contacts the ex. I find with Virgos, the ex calls to somehow be “rescued” and he thrives on being able to “help” her. I still don’t know if it is even possible to be friends with an ex… It’s one thing to say hello to each other if you see them in the city or at an event, but anther to in contact all the time. (one person mostly likely is still in love with the other….usually the virgo)

  25. I heard the news about Lance A and I remembered what I read here on the blog..I have several Virgo friends and relatives and i imagine more than one have a few “secrets” hidden away… It’s always shocking when you assume someone leads a “pristine” life and the veil drops…
    Of course I don’t mean to generalize.

  26. Whats with all the hate.Were private for one reason and this is why.we dont like drama.we are independant thinkers and doers .we dont want or need anyones dramatic or jealous opinions.sounds like jealousy towards us virgos.our business is our business.if u dont like it,dont talk to us

  27. dude all you Virgos are exactly the same you never say that you need to change anything about yourselves you only point the finger at others saying that others need to change. That is the problem that people have with Virgos and one of the many many reasons why most people who have a run in with a negative Virgo vow never to trust or get close to any of you again. I’ve never heard a Virgo admit a mistake and say that they will change it never never never ever.

    • Jim I’m a Virgo I have spent last year addressing my personal problems I haven’t actually criticised anyone and I can take critics advice. Run in with one bad Virgo and you’re judging all of us. I made a mistake and changed my ways I didn’t admit it to everyone but I admitted it to those I know care. Your attitude is probably y a Virgo will never admit anything to you. I personally hate Sagittarius Gemini libras right not I think u have personality issues

  28. My apologies in advance for “digging” up a 2006 post — but I have to say, I do enjoy your articles, Elsa!

    I’m a Sagittarius Sun, Aries Moon, my mother is a Virgo Sun, Gemini Moon, and my significant other is a Virgo Sun, Scorpio Moon. Of all the signs in the zodiac, Virgos have always been the most mysterious to me. At the same time, they’ve proven themselves to be the most reliable, consistent and loyal people to have on your side. My chart is heavy with fire, so consistency has never been my strong suit. Virgos often teach me how to approach things a step at a time, with consistency and patience.

    On the other hand, many that I know do seem to be very aware of their “public” images vs. their private lives. They’re naturally detail oriented and critical of themselves and others. Growing up with a Virgo mother, I have been “trained” to also take on a certain prim and proper image when I’m out in connection with her. She will look me over with a detailed eye, and give me a list of her honest but brutal demands on what needs to be adjusted, ironed, changed (too much makeup, not enough makeup). Give me a list of reminders — “don’t smile with too much teeth,” “look more relaxed than you did the last time we were out..” Also prime me on what to say and what “secrets” to withhold — “if they ask, this is what you should say…and remember not to say…” To this day, in connection with my mother, I am known as the extremely prim and proper 30-something virgin, never once had a boyfriend and therefore, no messy emotional ties, always dressed like I stepped out of an Ann Taylor catalog. I appear aloof, but it’s really because I’m worried I’ll slip and say something that I’m not supposed to.

    The truth is, I could care less about what others think of me based on how I’m dressed and based on my past relationships, which HAVE left me with some deep emotional wounds. And I’m not a virgin, I enjoy physical intimacy with those whom I love — my chart is practically all fire + a sprinkling of Scorpio. And my publicly clean, prim and proper boyfriend wouldn’t have it any other way. 🙂

    • As a Virgo I think you are awesome and I understand what you said about your mother. Some virgos are like sagittarius in not caring anymore (at least when you are 70 like me) I cared as a child and most of my life. Not so much now.

  29. I have a secret life, for sure. At first I was really ashamed of this. Now I’m unsure how to handle it, but it makes me more compassionate towards others, knowing that some things you just can’t control or foresee in life.

  30. Olivia,

    I just love your post. It’s been a while since anyone has posted anything on here. How your mom was with you reminds me of how I am with my teenage daughter and she could care less what anyone thinks about her (she’s Aries-Taurus cusp) lol. I really enjoyed reading it. I definitely enjoy portraying the whole pristine, librarian, prim & proper “oh my god I wouldn’t do that” image to co-workers, friends, and family HOWEVER I know how I really am inside. A lot of how I am on the inside has come to surface with time and I have come to not care what everyone thinks about me and could care less if I am not always organized and prim and proper (except at work of course because there I have to be professional otherwise I might get fired lol). I am happy with who I am now even if it is being a madonna/whore as someone else put it. It’s no different than being a “lady in the living room and freak in the bedroom”. As Virgo’s we get this and for some of us we are truly okay with it. In fact some of us thrive off of it. For Virgo’s variety is the spice of life (and if your a Virgo, you’ll know what I mean by this).

  31. Yes, I have a secret life. I try to maintain a veneer of holding it all together, even when this is not possible. Truth is, I have realized over the course of the last five years or so that if I do this, I self-destruct and let my shit go all to pieces. The compulsions I’ve experienced during this time period I have managed (barely) to keep in check, thanks to my Saturn, but I still feel emotionally and psychologically battered.

    Basically, for me, lately–the more I reach out to help someone else, you can bet it’s because I’m a wreck and am avoiding helping myself. Pisces/Neptune all the damn way.

  32. Hi MagicZara,

    I have come to realize that at times you have to “let it all go to shit” even if it is emotionally. I think that as imperfect humans sometimes we do ‘self-destruct’ even if you don’t want to do. Compulsions (I don’t know what yours are) can be difficult to manage and keep in check. I have found freedom in realizing and knowing that as an imperfect human, I won’t always be able to keep mine in check and I try to find a healthy outlet. Sometimes I fail at finding a healthy outlet but this brings me experience and I learn a better way of handling and reacting to my compulsions the next time they come around. Often times as Virgo’s we are so hard on ourselves for not holding up to that image we portray. I’ve learned to let it go and in the process no one even noticed that I was no longer trying to hold up that image (and being hard on myself) therefore I found relief in not being so harsh on myself for basically different on the inside that what I was portraying on the outside. Although of course the quintessential Virgo is a perfectionist, worker bee, that always wants to be of service. Some of those traits are staples. We also have to be careful at not becoming co-dependent which is being so involved with others needs (friend, boyfriend, kids, work, community) so much that you begin to ignore yours.

  33. There were some great comments here. I was a little shocked that someone said she hates Virgo more than Scorpio. I had to laugh at that. Anyway, I’m a Virgo woman with a pretty dark side. I don’t believe this is anyone else’s business. Some people only want to know things about you to ridicule or to simply be nosey. Oh well, if the Virgo private life is really that interesting and people desire to know it, may they be thoroughly entertained.

    It’s just in me to be this conservative “librarian” by day and this hair down, glasses off woman by night. I do like to appear as an innocent, virginal creature. Is that wrong? Only a few should see the other side. The few I choose. Now I’m in a situation where I can’t hide the naughty side. When I think of Madonna’s song, “Like A Virgin,” I definitely think of Virgo women. I am embracing my “sides” slowly but surely.
    Someone said that Virgos don’t admit when they’re wrong. Yes we do and we’re way harder on ourselves than we should be. If I’m hated as a Virgo, it’s funny to me. So much Virgo hate here. 🙂

  34. Thanks. I got the link in my email. It didn’t appear as a link here on my Android. Strange phone.
    I’m not a typical Virgo where I like to clean. I will clean but I hate it. Cooking, forget about it. It’s tedious. I’m independent enough to not care if a man shuns me for not liking to cook or clean. I’m a Virgo. Who needs a live-in man? Not me. :). Hell, I don’t even need a visit. Of course, I will do my best to never go out with a hair out of place and will fuss over my hair the whole time.
    I love Virgos. I need to learn to let down my hair and enjoy myself more. It’s always work, work, work.

  35. i have a Virgo girlfriend well had one always suspected her of cheating I myself am a pisces. I notice she is very much into her looks and is known as a “slut” she was easy for 2 of my friends she had sex with. when i point out possibly cheating traits she has or tiny lies she has it takes her a while to admit it and she hates when i bring them up in later arguments i havent physically caught her cheating i left before i could. Probably shoudl have waited to see if i could find out

    • Im going through the same thing with my virgo girlfriend its just a gut feeling. I have been working midnight for almost 2 years theres no telling. She have done things to make investigate and whenever I would mention it she gets angry.

      • You need to stop digging for bad things it’s really not a good habit at all. I think you just want to find something my libra ex accused me of cheating and when he looked he got really abusive . He actually cheated twice !!!! Your gut feeling is insecurity. She would get angry she’s innocent and you’re fucking annoying. Police interrogate someone so much they admit stuff have not done to stop the questioning

    • My virgo girl freind has many red flags but what can I say I’m a Taurus man and our readings r off the charts sex is incredible , our intuition is great but but still something tells me she is not ready she drives me crazy but what can I say I’m in love with her. Lol.

  36. Hi,Virgos. I wanted to say hello and I hope that everyone is enjoying Fall. I hope to read more Virgo stories here. Even the ones where Virgos are hated interest me.

  37. IDK, I’m glad you left her. It’s better to leave than to keep bringing up past cheating you haven’t resolved or forgiven.

    Many Virgo women are very loyal to one man. I’m not giving her an excuse but she might not have been getting everything she needed from you. I don’t know how well you knew her but Virgo women have many hidden passions and desires. If you don’t take the time to pull them out, she will grow bored with you.

    • “I don’t know how well you knew her but Virgo women have many hidden passions and desires. If you don’t take the time to pull them out, she will grow bored with you.”

      Haha very true.. :p

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