satori (a Pisces) writes:
When life throws you Virgo– and you’re feeling averse to actual work– read advice lists.
I’ve just discovered a new guilty pleasure: the lists at men’s health dot com. Oh, the laugh out loud, squirmy goodness of it all, and not ecause they’re wrong either. There was one particular passage prefacing a list of what not to say to women that may live on my desktop forever: “Women freak out. Often at you. Often for no discernible reason.”
There are bits where men give advice and ones where women give advice. As far as can tell they can all be replaced by advice from the movie Field of Dreams:
Shoeless Joe Jackson: The last two have been high and tight, so where o you think the next one’s gonna be?
Archie Graham: Well, either low and away… or in my ear.
Shoeless Joe: He’s not gonna want to load the bases, so look for low and away. But watch out for in your ear.
I’ve always thought baseball movies contained the best relationship advice I’ve ever seen but your mileage may vary.
“You just got lesson number one: don’t think; it can only hurt the ball club.” Crash Davis, Bull Durham
Virgo besieged or no, I think this excellent advice for *any* day where the thermometer registers about 100*.
Uh doh, is this something about sex? I was going right along with it until someone mentioned something about in his ear, and this is where I got lost. Taurus does not want to miss out on any sexual innuendos.
“Taurus does not want to miss out on any sexual innuendos.”
LMAO
“innuendos” ::snicker::
let me re-issue the memo: it is ALWAYS about sex. even when it’s not. even when a cigar is just a cigar, and you’re certain it’s just a cigar, one must reflect on the times when it’s a CIGAR.
What IS it with men and that movie anyway. I have never understood what is so fascinatingly wonderful about that movie, I thought it was a little bland, and that was the First time I had to sit through it.
which one? Field of Dreams or Bull Durham? I like FoD cos how cool would it be to have a baseball diamond in your YARD? Bull Durham is like a religious text for me.
“This is a very simple game. You throw the ball, you catch the ball, you hit the ball. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, sometimes it rains.”
I started thinking sexual innuendos with “The last two have been high and tight, so where o you think the next one’s gonna be?”
satori, I don’t quite understand the baseball metaphors.
I love how when they talk about self confidence being attractive to a woman, they have to quote the Goodfellas.
“You remember that scene in Goodfellas when Ray Liotta takes Lorraine Bracco to the Copa? He slips her through the back door, tipping heavies the whole way, chatting up other wiseguys, and finally ending up at a table in front of the stage. Liotta had something much more important than a roll of Franklins: He had confidence. And its effect on Bracco was clear. You knew he was getting laid that night.
“Women want a man with steel balls,” says R. Don Steele, without a hint of irony in his voice. “
Dina– the high and tight/in your ear thing, I think that speaks to chaos. you can reason life, figure out what’s likely to happen, but you always have to keep in mind that ANYthing can happen.
I was thinking of that in regard to the idea that many men are totally baffled about what a women might be serving up next. it’s likely this or likely that but watch out they don’t brain ya.
and don’t all men quote the godfather too? but yeah, steel balls. seriously, i think that’s what men want in a woman too.
hahaha, yeah they do. And I think they want steel balls in a woman too, or at least “the type of woman who will watch the game and drink a Bud” according to Men’s Health magazine.