8th House Life In The Shadow: Use And Abuse Of Power

geyserI was sitting in the chair of my hair lady of seven years when she asked me, ‘If you had the cure for cancer would you share it?”

I did a double take. ‘Er… I suppose I would.”

Next thing I knew she reached into the bottom drawer of her station and she started pitching me on becoming a Mormon.

“A what?” I said. “A Mormon?” I couldn’t have been more shocked. “You’ve got to be kidding me?”

I saw that hair lady a couple more times but when she told me I had the “Mark of the Beast” on my forehead (and I told her to cut my bangs short so it could be seen by one and all), it became sadly apparent I was going to need another stylist. In whatever case I recalled this story as I sat down to write this other bit. Here is the other bit:

I plucked a domino today and managed to derail a fight with the soldier the sprang up last night the same way a geyser does in Yellowstone park. And it was effective too but let me tell you something, it was not easy. It is not easy in the heat of battle to stop the fight. All kinds of things run through your head.

For example, if I stop the fight, I stop the fight without having made my point or gotten my way. If I do this and do it continually will resentment build?

I thought that was a pretty good question, one I have now resolved but here’s how these two stories fit together.

I have come up with the cure for cancer if cancer = the notorious fights between my partner and I. So do I share it?

That I have to ask speaks to Venus and Mars in Scorpio in the sky right now, never mind my own packed 8th house. And make no mistake!!

If I do stop the fight it’s due pure manipulation. There’s that dirty word again and maybe it’s not so dirty after all.

Use and abuse of power, it’s such a fine line.



8th House Life In The Shadow: Use And Abuse Of Power — 7 Comments

  1. I feel like I understand. When I decided to stop fighting with my Aries mother I found the tactics I used worked so well I almost felt guilty, lol.
    I’ve since come to the conclusion that most of what I do is manipulative ANYWAY so what the hell.

    Meaning: I am extremely conscious of my behaviour and how I may or may not affect people. I don’t know why this is, maybe Saturn in the 8th? Anyway I’ve often felt I have the upper hand by “knowing what to do.” But I know how much I love other people and don’t wish to hurt them so I DON’T feel guilty. At all.

  2. I constantly struggle with the definition of “being controlling.” It’s got such a bum rap. I mean, people throw that phrase out with a snear and I freeze. Yeah, I’m pretty clear that I can’t control someone else, but when I fiddle with my own responses/reactions, I’m often in a quandary about whether I’m manipulating unfairly. Sun in 8th, moon in scorpio, pluto square sun.. thank God I have a sense of humor!

  3. “If I do stop the fight it’s due pure manipulation. There’s that dirty word again and maybe it’s not so dirty after all.”

    I don’t think it’s dirty. Don’t we all engage in forms of manipulation every day of our lives? Relationships are such complex halls of mirrors – “I want” versus “you want”, a continual tipping and re-balancing of an invisible scale (yes, I have Libra). Manipulation can be overt or subtle but I think we all do it all the time. If we didn’t, we’d be machines.

  4. I’ll be honest; I really don’t know what I think about all this. I’m going to have to ponder and see what bubbles out onto the surface to help me along.

  5. I have stopped the fight for the overall good of the relationship instead of my intense need to be right or justified in the argument. I came to the conclusion a while ago I can be “right” and all alone or I can let some things go that in the overall scheme of things aren’t really that big of a deal,lol. Most of my life in relationships I had to be right and have my man see things “my” way or agree or do what I wanted him to do,lol. That never got me very far in those relationships. Hmmmm I wonder why…..lol. I don’t know maybe age has let me let go of the need to be in control or “right”,lol.

  6. No disrespect meant to you or Soldier, but if you look at this scenario in more general terms, it looks like a person channeling their power has two options: if they control themself they’re being manipulative, and if they control the other person they’re being controlling. But what other choice is there when handling power? You either wield it towards yourself or others. You can be in command of yourself and use your power (which is your right), or you can try to control others and abuse your power (which is *not* your right). And if you choose to do nothing, your power is used against you and you are controlled. You either own your power or pay the price.

  7. yes, it is.
    that’s where i realize i have to examine my motivations far more closely than the actions based upon the motivations. (though they’re intertwined.)
    one way or another, it’s all manipulation, if you look at it the right way.

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