Dear Scorpio,

You are 21 years old. And I may be an old lady out of the loop but if my boyfriend had ever mailed a picture of his penis to another girl when I was your age (never mind pictures I was in), I would have picked him up and thrown him into the next state. It would definitely been the last he ever saw of me, so based on this I find your response baffling. Why would you put up with this?

It goes without saying you have no business logging onto his business. This is a character flaw, you know? You ought to do something about that, but first let’s deal with this man.

I understand you have been with him for 2 years but when something like this happens, as far as I am concerned, you have been with him 2 years too long. Especially when you are 21 and have no tie downs. No children, I mean. So here’s my advice:

Take your stellium in Scorpio that included a Venus Pluto conjunction and amputate. Cut this guy off, cut him off for good and I’ll tell you why.

It’s because he can’t be trusted. You will never trust him and if you can’t trust him, what do you have? Well if you’re a Scorpio, what you’ve got is garbage. Something to set out at the curb… permanently.

You can’t be trusted either, of course. You poke in people’s business, so if I were you I would take this whole thing as a wake up call. Resolve to partner with someone you can trust and to be a trustworthy partner, because this other stuff is going to lead you to nothing but pain and you said you’ve had a lifetime of that, right?

Well I believe you. So get your order of operations down.

Use your spider senses up front to suss out whether or not a person can be trusted. This is something you can know for the most part. If a person can be trusted, proceed carefully. If not ditch them and move to the next. It’s a different application of the same “stealth”, but this guy? He’s got to go. Because there a million men out there who can tell you that you’re the most beautiful. I say, where’s the meat?

Good luck.

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Mercury is in Scorpio and let’s see. First we have someone tracking a reader via RemoteSpy.com and then another reader writes in to cop to the fact she accesses a co-workers email to monitor her workplace affairs.

Personally, I don’t snoop. I am so hard core with this, you’d think I’d have burned doing it or something but that never happened. Witness this:

The AMF and I used to separate for short periods from time to time. He would draft letters to me which he would never send. And we’d get back together and there they’d be.

I used his computer all the time. I used it more than he did and there would be some new document on his desktop named, ‘Elsa”. Did I open it? Of course not.

“He probably wanted you to read whatever was in there,” a friend remarked.

“No he didn’t. He knows me. He knows me well enough to know I’m not going to click that thing. If he wants me to read it, he can open it himself and send it to me. Or he can tell me there is something on my desktop I want you to read. Otherwise, forget about it…”

I realize this is extreme restraint but fact is it takes (or took) no restraint at all. I respect a person’s privacy but way more than that, I respect myself. I like being trusted and I like be able to know that even if I’m not trusted, I can be.

I also cop to having some fear what I might find if I go poking around and last I trust the universe will let me know what I need to know… at the time I need to know it.

You?

Where is your Mercury and how is it aspected?

Dear Abandoned,

There is no way to spin this experience so that you come out less traumatized and I feel horrible for you. There is no crueler way to break up with someone and all I can do is try to give you a clear read from the outside in the hopes it brings small comfort.

First, I think you are well within your rights to do anything you want. Write, call, or show up wherever he might be to confront him if you think this will help you heal. However, I don’t think he’s coming back. And it’s been long enough now you’d be well advised to let your thinking and your feelings shift from holding out hope to beginning to accept the reality that you wouldn’t want him back. Because would you?

Regardless of what you had (and I believe it was substantial), you are a Scorpio with four planets in the sign and you must see this man cannot be trusted. He has shattered your relationship totally, and utterly betrayed and abandoned you… and what this makes him is a loser! Seriously. And tell you something else.

He won’t get away with it. If you wonder if he’s just skipping along with his new man, I assure you, he is not. You just can’t pull this kind of thing and be okay. On the surface, maybe. But on a deeper level this is going to gnaw at him until the end of time unless he surfaces and makes some effort to do right by you.

Not that you should wait for that! You have to start looking forward and as painful as this is, you are 22 years old. And you are going to have all kinds of experiences. You are going to meet better men for sure! In fact, someday you’ll look back and thank your lucky stars you got rid of this guy when you did, because anyone who would do this to their lover is worthless like a 3 dollar bill.

And I know you have to mourn but be specific about it. Mourn the fact you invested in an empty vessel, not the misguided notion you have lost the best man in the world. Because people with soul don’t behave like this and people with no soul? Well the sooner you can break with them, the better.

Be proud. You did nothing wrong. And have some faith because in the larger scheme there is a reason for this, like the universe clearing the decks, making space so the new and better man can come into the picture. Wanna bet?

You’re going to be okay.

Much love and good luck.

~~
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Recently I had someone tell me the only people he trusted in this world was me and Doris Day. “And I don’t even know if Doris Day is alive,” he added.

Well she is. I checked “Dead or Alive?” and verified this. But anyway, I trust quite a few people. Actually I trust virtually everyone I meet because I internalized Henry’s philosophy when I was a kid.

Henry thought most people were kind and that all people should be given the benefit of the doubt until they proved themselves to be disagreeable. I believed him. I absorbed this and have always lived this way. I just think people are up to good all the time, which I admit is a little naive.