Here’s another story about Kay (a real person with a fake name) – a double Aquarius gal I used to run with. This is circa 1994.

We were out for the evening in downtown Denver, which is a walking around situation. You park the car and walk from here to there and everywhere. Kay had to pee so we stopped in a little bar we’d never been in before, and made our way through it to the restrooms in the back.

It was a small place, both the bar and the restroom. In fact, it was a one-seater in there, so she went in, while I waited outside restroom door. I got talking to a man standing nearby who was great distress.

Continue reading Yang Women – Redux: “Some Boys We Met” Kay – A Double Aquarius with a Libra Moon

From 2006 – Pedro is a pseudonym.

Ben is a life long friend of mine. 25 years or so. He a Scorpio, and a bi-racial, gay, cello player and teacher. He’s plays with various symphony orchestras and has been the musical director of a school district for more than twenty years. We’re on the phone here.

“Oh, Elsa. I have this one kid. He is such a mess. He’s a terrible mess and his mother doesn’t help. She always saying, wait’ll you get married and have kids, Pedro,” he clucked. “Pedro isn’t going to do that. Pedro is gay!”
Continue reading Conversations With Ben – A Public Service Announcement: Gay Youth

Dear Elsa,

Double Sagittarius
Cuba
Continue reading Her Fiance Says She Is Rude: Astrology-Based Advice

Dear Elsa,

I’m a gay man who recently met a Libra man who is two years older than me (They are 55 and 57). We communicate well, joke around and have very similar dietary and exercise habits. He is much more calm than I am which balances things out. My question
is that he seems aloof at times and very into his job and caring for his dog and is a homebody.

Any advice on how a Scorpio should understand a Libra man besides just chilling and letting things take their course?? Thanks!!

Scorpio Man
United States

Dear Scorpio, letting things take there course is always the best plan. General tips for Libra – well they love to partner. Once partnered they can relax and it sounds like this is what this man is doing.

You also specifically state he is balancing things out which is the job of Libra. This means if you act one extreme they will typically act the other but if you do too much of this (Scorpio manipulating), you risk pissing off the Libra which is always disastrous. Because while Libra does try very hard to be pleasant, if you get one to blow, you can expect a bloodbath.

Good luck

Anyone else?

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A couple days ago my friend, satori who is a Pisces told me that she connected me to the mundane world. “I connect you to the mundane and everyone else who is mundane, I connect to the other,” she said, and I laughed. I think it’s pretty funny when you have to get a Pisces to ground you; however she is not the first.

My sister is the first Pisces who attempted to connect me with the mundane. I say attempted because I am pretty sure she would tell you she failed and I was thinking about this today. I recalled something I wrote awhile back and meant to pull it up and post it but this came out instead…

My sister loves high level shopping (think Posh Spice) but she is stuck with a sister who could care less. Back when, it was big talk in her circles. No one could believe she had a sister who oblivious to clothing and makeup.

At one point, when I was about 30 she grilled me wanting to know if I was a lesbian. Apparently this was a theory amongst her and her friends. It was the best explanation they could come up I guess. I am not a clotheshorse, therefore I am a lesbian!

Continue reading Are You A Lesbian? We Want To Know Because We’re Looking For One Around Here…

Dear Aquarian,

No, I don’t think there is any hope of changing the dynamic of this relationship and it suits you perfectly as is, whether you realize this or not.

As an Aquarian with Venus in Aquarius you want a lot of space and with this man, you get it. You also have your Moon and Mars in Aries so you like the challenge he provides. He must be perennially hunted, see? But most of all it’s the pining.

You have Venus square Neptune and there is a part of you that is addicted to pining for this un-gettable man but check this:

If you get him… if you actually get this guy and nail him down I guarantee you the situation will flip on you. Instead of where you are now, you will be pining for freedom and challenge. Pretty trippy, huh?

I admit that living in this hall of mirrors with various drives conflicting is a job.  However it is your job and at least you’re not bored or boring.

Good luck.

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Dear Girlfriend,

I really have no way of telling if your boyfriend is gay or not. I suspect he is not considering he has spent four years with you and seems comfortable enough interacting with another man. Point being: if he wants it, there it is. You are obviously open-minded so it’s not like the sky is going to fall if he come up with this so it makes me think while his friend may very well be gay (and in love with him) your boyfriend is merely being Aquarian.

To address all points, the fact that you suspect your mother makes me suspect your mother as well so I factor her out and it leaves me to wonder why you are feeling lonely and unattractive. Is it because he is neglecting you in favor of his friend? Or is it because he is boring you?

Because it sounds to me as if he could be being himself (a detached, non-judgmental, not that interested in sex, Aquarian) and you could be finding out you want something very different in a man and on this I have some personal experience.

I had an Aquarian beau once and I was just a million times more sexual and tactile than he was. I also had a very close friend (Ben – we’re still friends 20 years later), who is gay and I asked him… ‘Is this guy gay or what?”

He asked me how much time the man spent with me and I told him he called me 10 times a day and saw me 5 or 6 times a week. Verdict? Not gay.

“Gay men like men, Elsa. They really have very little interest in women but they love men and there is no way they are going to waste that much of their time in the company of a woman when there are men… everywhere.”

So apply that when debating your boyfriend’s sexual preference and beyond that, here is my advice:

I would definitely not confront him about his sexuality. Instead, focus on what you are getting from the relationship. Because it sounds to me as if you are not getting what you want and need, regardless if he is gay, straight or zebra.

Good luck.

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Dear Man,

This is a great question and while I can’t make a decision for you, I am happy to offer my opinion – and in my opinion you should definitely go back. Go back because you love him and he loves you and this is not all that easy to find.

As to whether you are asking for too much, well you are not. But you asking him to give you something that does not come easy for him and making yourself miserable in the process. In other words you are focusing on the lack, which while it may be real becomes insignificant if you opt to refocus.

The idea of refocusing on the positive goes without saying but you can go much further if you like. You can opt to raise the bar on yourself around what kind of lover you are – and rather than looking to how he can improve, make yourself better than ever.

Make yourself better than ever by being the kind of lover who does not ride their partner’s ass all the time and you will be in demand and loved like never before. And oddly enough, when your partner perceives your higher value, he is very like to start hitting up those birthdays which he knows damned well are important to you… before someone else decides to do it for him. So this is my advice:

Get off his ass, get on your own, watch the result and marvel. And the astrology?

You have hard aspects from Saturn which does give a tendency towards seeing the glass as half-empty. Thing is you can turn this around with work and I promise that if you do, you will see everything in your life improve.

Good luck.

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Dear Gemini,

Your gal pal told you she was bisexual and apparently she was not kidding. So yes of course she is trying to talk you into the type of relationship that will satisfy her needs, which is exactly the same thing that you are trying to do to her. Can you see this?

What you have here is a power struggle, or a struggle to control. You want her to cram her foot into your shoe and she wants you to cram your foot into hers. Is this ever going to work? Not comfortably.

As for her hot and cold business – Aries is notorious for loving the thrill of the chase but loathing the security and structure – which with Venus in Cancer and Mars in Capricorn is something you crave.

I think you’re getting the picture. Very hard to make this one work, I am thinking it’s not meant to but other may disagree and can let you know in the comments.

I am sorry and good luck.

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