Dear Sagittarius,

I have never seen someone who could diddle themselves this profoundly. Seriously. You’re 30 years old, and you’ve got a man who has never managed a relationship in his life. He tells you point blank he’s not interested in you, he has never touched you and yet here you are convinced every breath he takes is special… the rise and fall of his lovely chest sends you into the stratosphere! ::shakes head:: I don’t get it. You should have been a romance writer, but outside of that, there is nothing here.

For example, he’s not pulling you in. You’re going in and blaming him for your action. You can’t do something and hold another person responsible for it. Well you can, but it’s not going to get you anywhere.

Your intuition tells you he has cards he’s not playing. My intuition tells me he does not want to play cards with you or he’d being doing it, don’t you think?

And as for his getting benefits of a relationship without paying some phantom price for them… whose fault is that? Who is giving him the benefits so who should we blame?

I’m sorry. But there is nothing here but a bloated 5th house, Neptune-in-Sagittarius fantasy love affair you are having with yourself. And that’s your business, but it’s very hard to feel sorry for you. Because you aren’t stuck in this, you know. You are sticking yourself in this and there’s a big difference.

Good luck.

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Dear Amsterdam,

You understate your chart. You’re an Aries with a Scorpio rising all right, but you’ve also got Mars and Jupiter in Aries – and that my dear is some hot, hot fire. And when you see circumstances like this repeat in your life, I think asking why is the way to go and astrology can illuminate.

Now it seems to me the problem is with the men, not you and I’ll explain. Say you had this fiery sexy Mars situation, but Saturn was leaning on the thing. This would indicate your sex drive being thwarted and it might manifest just as you describe.

But this is not the way your chart is set up. In fact, it is just the opposite. You’re like a fast car… a fine motorcycle with nothing but open road on the horizon. And what I think is happening is you are meeting men who have various impediments in their charts, and suffering because of it. It’s as if you’re the fastest car on the road and no one who can keep up. They try, or they may want to try but they wind up eating your dust again and again until they just relent and opt to let you ride on up ahead. And you can’t do anything about them, but you can do something about you.

You can be aware of this situation. You can be aware you are the hottest hot rod out there, overwhelming to almost everyone and you can try to govern yourself. And I don’t mean, stuff your sex drive. I mean, do what I have to with my racing engine. Find as many outlets as possible so you don’t consume the people you love.

In your case, your Aries is in the 5th and 6th house. The 5th house is “fun sex” so there you go. But it is also about creativity and children so for example, you could get involved in children’s sports. Run all day with a pack of kids and maybe once-a-day sex would do it for you. And you would be satisfying your 6th house need to serve, while you’re at it.

The point is, to assert yourself (Aries) in 5th house matters and bottom line, you need a creative outlet. You need some other channel for your energy and with some of your fire discharged for the day, perhaps you can find a man who can deal with the rest. So this is my advice: Expand!

Good luck.

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