I sure like Facebook! It really surprises me and it’s got to be all these planets in Aquarius. They’re in my first house and so I assert myself socially.

Where does the stellium in Aquarius fall in your chart and what’s happening?

Dear Girlfriend,

Your man sounds a mess but never mind that. Forget his denial – how about your own? Because it seems you left out or glossed over some major pieces of information here, and in other places you just sound plain confused.

For example, you say you had a fabulous “extremely wonderful” relationship with a man who could communicate. Two paragraphs later you say he evades questions and keeps you guessing. Huh? That is a profound disconnect and when you are suffering this kind of confusion, you’ve no business trying to diagnose the other.

Is there hope for your relationship? I don’t think so. This sounds like the relationship that never was. Because who is grounded in reality here? It’s not you and it’s certainly not him. Making plans to be with you is not being with you, is it? I think this man is wasting your time. And that’s your fault, because you’re the one who keeps picking up the phone to take part in this train wreck. But I don’t think you’re going to be able to do it for long. Know why?

It’s because Saturn is transiting your first house, begging you to work on yourself. And you are co-operating by going to therapy, which is good. Because I’m sure you’re going to hear this same kind of message here there and everywhere. And ultimately I think this will be enough to keep you on the right path and lead you out of this.

Good luck.

~~
Have a question? Need advice? Ask here!

Interested in a personal consultation? Click here for more info…

Molly asks regarding the Artist Up Against An Angry Bastard…:

I have Sun in Aries too, and although I totally agree with you that Artist shouldn’t give up his/her career over this, I found myself frustrated by your answer.

Molly, I understand your frustration and I’m happy to explain my methodology. This gal has Saturn transiting her first house. Her Aries house that is! The house of “self”. So she is being called upon to control (Saturn) herself. She is in effect, a Capricorn rising now and she is going to have much effect with Capricorn technique at this point than she will by charging ahead, Aries style.

See, she’s got a goal…a life long goal. How Saturn is that? So she’s got her mountain to climb and the idea is to get up it…by hook or crook!

Now I am not sure if you have ever climbed a mountain but I have and can tell you that sometimes, with some mountains, you will never make it where you’re going if you don’t plot a course. You need a plan!

And the most direct route is rarely the best option. I mean how good is it if you try to climb straight up and fall and break your fucking head? Major setback, yes? But do you know what a switchback is?

It’s a path up a mountain cut sideways so you can climb more comfortably and the way I see it this gal is on her mountain doing her climb and she has now hit an impediment in the form or this crazy asshole.

So being Aries she tries to fight him. But it’s not working, is it? She’s not winning and worse, fighting with him has derailed her and caused her lose focus on what she is doing on the mountain in the first place. Is she there to fight this bastard? Or there for an art career?

So perhaps this is where you and I part ways as to what to do. As an Aries, perhaps you think she should continue to bump heads with this guy…to ram and ram and ram. But as a Capricorn, this is where I say, hold the fuckin’ phone! I can’t get over this rise / this rock/ this whatever, but I still want the top of that hill and I want it bad.

So what I’m going to do is plot a course around this motherfucker and leave him on the side of the mountain (with no canteen) to fend for himself. To play with himself. To do whatever the fuck he wants, because I am back on my goal now. I am moving along.

So there you go. This is my thinking and I think the Saturn transit supports this approach. There are times where leaving a dragon on the trail, un-slayed, does not make you a coward. What it makes you is wise.!

Dear Artist,

There is really no choice here. Can you let some angry jackass prevent you from having the career you have wanted since you were five years old? Of course not! That’s not an option. Think about it. How about you quit it all? And then what? ::shakes head:: And then nothing! So you see you are going to have to stay and fight, but I think the fight is going to be mainly with yourself.

Now it doesn’t matter whether this guy is mentally ill or not. He probably is and it may help you to think of him like that but here are some facts:

You are a strongly Cardinal person. That means you tend to be controlling and if you read your post up there, you will see what you are trying to do with this guy. You are trying to get him to follow the rules! With your 10th house Sun and Venus and Mars in Aries, you are trying to police him! And let me tell you something:

I have had very limited success in getting others to color inside the lines! In fact, I have had no success at all! Have you?

Look. Say you have a kid and you force them to comply? What happens? What happens is the first chance they get; they get the hell away from you! They escape! You simply cannot control other people. So you must control yourself. And with Saturn (control) currently transiting your first house (self), this message could not be any stronger. So here is the smart play:

The guy is crazy! Crazy people make their own rules!! They have no interest in doing otherwise. So get this into you head. He is a rule-breaking bastard and there is nothing you can do about it. In fact, it’s none of your business! Running his life is none of your business!

Understanding this, and accepting this as reality, start thinking about how you’re going to work around him towards achieving your life long goal and I think you’ll be happy with how things progress.

Good luck.

~~
Have a question? Need advice? Ask here!

Dear Heart,

I think you’re on track. You’re coming to terms with (harsh) reality and the best I can advise is, you go as easy on yourself as you can. As a Capricorn, you are naturally self-chastising and this tendency is currently exacerbated by a Saturn transit. However, this is easier said than done, so I have a tip.

The energy has to go somewhere, so rather than beating yourself up and feeling unworthy and so forth, please try to focus on what you can learn about yourself. For example, with your Moon in Libra, you don’t like to be alone! And I have a great sympathy for people like you, because I am a people like you! And this is in part, why this happened.

It is also probably how you wound up in the sucky marriage as well, and with Saturn transiting your 1st house, aspecting natal Saturn in the 7th house… well, that’s the Me/We axis and the focus right now is to work on the self (1st house) as you relate to others (7th house).

So if you will get to work (Saturn) learning (Saturn) so you can be wise (Saturn) as opposed to becoming depressed and frozen in fear, (negative expression of Saturn), I think you will get a modicum of relief short term and great benefit longer term. Need a first step? What goat doesn’t?

Get some books about relationships. “I’m Okay, You’re Okay” type stuff, and start to read. This will take your mind of the immediate hurt but more importantly, it will put you in the realm of learning what you’re supposed to be learning right now. And once on the right path, the universe always supports.

Take care and good luck.

~~
Have a question? Need advice? Ask here!