I was talking to someone who was wanting to form a relationship with a person whose nature is similar to mine. I wound up describing the process I go through internally when I make a new friend. I explained that anyone who came on with too much, too fast, a “new best friend” sort made me incredibly nervous.
“When someone comes in and thinks they are going to fill up my life, I feel completely overwhelmed. I may like them initially but if my phone starts ringing off the hook, well right then I know I’m not going to be able to sustain the relationship.”
She was listening intently.
“People like me have to have a chance to feel you out and if you won’t allow time for this natural process then why is that? I don’t know why but whatever the reason, it can’t be good. I don’t even want to know what the reason is. If you can’t give me time to have my feelings and process them and if you don’t need time to have and process your own feelings then I’m going to want nothing to do with you because I know we’re entirely incompatible.”
This is my 8th house talking, I’m sure.
How (and when) do you form a friendship? What will break the deal in the process?