Opposing The Majority

go-with-the-flowThis is loosely related this thread in the forum: Question for Saturn- types who are driven or feel compelled to do the right thing

Often, I believe something is right or correct to do, simultaneously knowing that few people would agree with me. I’ll also be aware that the person (or force) that I’m opposing can probably find legions of people to take their side.

I feel compelled and I take the action, so I do it even though I  lack (Neptune) support (Saturn). Next thing I know, I’m one person standing against twenty or thirty or more.

I make significant choices in life, based on what I feel is the best or the right thing to do.  Since I’m often acting alone, I best be right in my judgement. I take enormous care that this be case. I’ll examine a situation to the point of exhaustion.  This may sound crazy, but I feel it has to be done.

If everyone is backing you, you can ride the tide. If no one is backing you, it’s exactly the opposite. If you’re going to go against the tide, you’ve got to have conviction and this is how I develop mine.

This situation sets up in my life, frequently.  More often then average, that’s for sure. It can be something like the fact no one thinks I should be an astrologer. I became one anyway.  I remain one, still.

I’m told not to write this or that on an astrology blog. Most agree I am making a serious mistake in my life, writing what I write. I do it anyway.

Sometimes this involves my separating from someone. The person then becomes my victim, in their mind and in the mind of others, and sometimes many others. I don’t agree with this majority opinion. I quietly, but defiantly, stand in opposition to it.

It’s not that my case could not be argued. It could be argued! I could argue it, convincingly. The problem is there is only so many hours in a day.

Because of time and energy constraints I have to make choices. My choice is to remain undefined, like an inkblot.  Then people call the blob whatever they wish to call the blob.

I don’t like this, but I accept it because it’s my own fault. If I won’t argue my own case, I can’t expect someone else to do if for me.  Even if someone would be willing to argue on my behalf, it would be near impossible, because they don’t know what my case is.

It’s not understood, because I don’t explain it. I don’t explain it because of time and energy constraints!

I’d rather have no defense then a false one.  Since I’m the only one who can provide a real defense and I refuse – that’s it.

We all choose what we do with our time.  I help people. I’m good at it.  I think it’s better to help people, then it is to spend time defending myself to people who shouldn’t be judging me in the first place.

But it’s lonely sometimes. Knowing that I appear to be wrong, even egregiously wrong, when only one side of a story is presented.

Are you willing to stand against the majority?  What’s it like for you?


Comments

Opposing The Majority — 52 Comments

  1. I was in an argument with my husband recently and I said that I had always felt a sense of judgement first by my parents and now by him and in turn I always fell short. He responded, shame on you. If you worry about judgement then you must know you are in the wrong. And I thought, like I thought many times with my parents, what’s the point of arguing, there must be more to this day.

  2. I think this is just my nature. Many years ago, I wrote about never defending astrology – for this reason – I don’t care if someone doesn’t like astrology. They’re welcome to think whatever they want.

    What I said back then, was that I thought it was wrong that a person like that, stop a passing-by astrologer and insist they argue about it. I don’t let people force or pressure me to spend my energy on what they think is important. What do I care if you don’t believe in astrology?

    So if person thinks I should do this or that, or feels I am a this or that, this does not obligate me to engage with then, or refute anything they say.

    I learned to discern things for myself when I was a teenager (also in my book). I’m not very interested in people who’ve not gained this skill for themselves.

    The bottom line is like I said. Time is precious. To me, it’s always been. I don’t want to waste mine debating astrology or trying to convince someone of my righteousness or innocence. Just the idea someone thinks they’re in a position to judge that is enough for me to discount them.

    Sorry, but facts are facts. I try to be polite, but even that only goes so far.

    I think some people really do have too much time on their hands…but I’ve never been one of them.

    You know how they say, if you want something done, give it to a busy person? There is a lot of truth in that.

  3. Its a lonely road to take when you oppose the majority, but I can so relate to those feelings. I’m a black sheep and a rebel, also an Astrologer. I have Uranus conjunct the South Node in my tenth house. If there is a road less traveled, thats the one I take. I’ve done my share of arguing and defending myself in my younger days, but now I realize I just don’t care anymore what people think of me or my choices. I live my life, my way.

    This has been an issue for me my entire life. Way back in the early ’70s when living together was called living in sin, thats what I did. I didn’t want to get married, so I didn’t, regardless of how my family and peers felt about it. I studied Astrology, though many people thought it was some kind of witchcraft. I have a long list of things that I have done that were contrary to what others thought I should have done.
    In the end, I’m happy with the choices I made in my life and thats all that matters.

  4. I completely understand this post :) I have a lot of unpopular opinions just because I tend to think differently from most people, especially under the saturn and uranus transit. If no one agrees with me, I’m generally alright because they’re entitled to their opinion as I am mine. I feel awkward however when I sense they need me to validate their opinion. I’m tired of defending myself because I’ve learned that yes its a waste of time and if someone wants to see the truth, eventually time reveals that.

    I’ve gone back and forth between being outspoken about my unpopular opinions to feeling utterly alone and crazy because no one else sees what I see. It’s not likely to ever get easier so I’m glad to see this post. You know who you are and what you stand for. Everyone else gets to live their life, I don’t want to let them live mine too.

    • Cici,
      Thanks for the last line in your comment ” Everyone else gets to live their life, I don’t want to let them live mine too.”…..love that!

  5. As a Catholic who has studied multiple religions I can so relate. Others want me to defend the Church. I was taught to turn the other cheek. I speak my piece and let it settle. Or I keep the peace and choose not to judge them. Sweet Medicine describes the seven dark arrows as a cult/pack like mentality.Similar to Nazi skinheads. Some need others to back up our belief systems. The light arrows are self awareness and self Love. I love myself enough to not waste my life force defending what I know to be true for me.

    • I may defend the church, but not to anyone who doesn’t know anything about the church. As it turns out, people who do know something about the church don’t tend to attack it. I haven’t had this come up, to be honest.

      If I was overtly attacked, I’d say, if you don’t want to be Catholic, don’t be Catholic, the same way I say, if you don’t like astrology, then don’t like astrology. But don’t expect me to care, because I don’t.

      I don’t need the validation. It’s nice to get validation, but I will go forward, with or without it. Personally, I don’t see any option.

  6. I just don’t see things like other people…for whatever reason. I don’t know what the reason is. But I am so often contrary everyone else, I do feel compelled to really make sure my view is sound, even if I choose not to express it.

    Like astrology. I know it works.

    Doing this for a living discounts me as a person, dramatically, but I know it works and I believe it’s what I’m supposed to be doing. If I come to think differently, I’ll quit.

    So then I become Catholic…which is counterculture to the astrology community – my politics are already all wrong, if I want to fit in with my peers…and then I’m reminded from time to time, religious people don’t want to deal with me either, because of astrology – lol.

    To add to the challenge, things are said and rumors started that are nowhere near accurate…stories grow as kids (I mean people) whisper like a bad game of telephone, and I just let ‘em roll.

    The reason is because I am into these other things (being an astrologer, being a Catholic or whatever else) that feed the problem.

    I become interested in something (funeral customs for example) – I am denigrated for it, but I would rather read another death book, then argue with someone who thinks I should read something else.

    Who goes to the library to get books they’re not interested in, hmm?

    And then I separate from people and they say God knows what about me….I am such an easy target, hanging my ass out here every day…with my name and face on the blog and why?

    Because it helps people! I know it does. I know my blog helps people, I know I help people and I just feel this is worthwhile…far more worthwhile then fighting with people I don’t respect anyway.

    Now that last is not PC of course, but I’ll leave it there, because obviously this is my personality.

    I remember people had a fit when I got with my husband. It may not have been good for them???

    I have not idea, but obliviously it was right for me.

    I am about to cut another turn, it will be counterculture as well. I don’t seem to be able to avoid this…I can tell you this, my mind’s made up.

    It’s another reason I don’t like to hang around and argue. It impedes progress!

    One of my favorite songs, ever, is Brownsville Girl. I LOVE that song, And at one point he says, “You can talk about me plenty when I’m gone.”

    And they do. :0

  7. you should have a positive button or something that we can use to affirm what you and others post on here. I know pretty much nothing about astrology but what you do here ( and others) helps like you couldn’t know!

  8. “Often, I believe something is right or correct to do, simultaneously knowing that few people would agree with me. I’ll also be aware that the person (or force) that I’m opposing can probably find legions of people to take their side”

    It happens a lot with me.

    I’ve got 12th Leo Saturn trine 4th Sagittarius Neptune… i have zero support from my family, and most relatives are against me, opposing me. I live in solitude.

  9. @Elsa,

    All of your blogs are amazingly accurate. As always, thank you! But I have to go back to the Mars at 27 degrees Libra blog, and how it affects other 27 degree planets in our charts – which in my case, unfortunately, is 27 degrees Saturn in Capricorn.

    This is one aspect that makes the recipient inexorably angry and seething – which is bang on. According to astrodienst.com, though, the Mars Rx square Saturn lasts all the way until July, 2014. I thought the blog said it would only last 3 weeks.

    I hate to whine (really!!), but I have never, ever had a harder time in life than now.

    Will that square really last until July? Am not sure I can make it that long. Am having fantasies of becoming a monk and meditating on a mountain top in Tibet, until this is over.

    I need a ray of light to clarify this. Are mitigating factors like Jupiter conjunct my Sun going to temper it somewhat? That conjunction is only lasting til the end of March. I might just stay home til all of this passes in 2015…

  10. Yeah, there are times I’ve had to do this. I carefully assess the facts and my reasoning first and then if it’s critical (it’s affecting lives, work, etc.) I just stand up tall and open the discussion and try to get people to see my viewpoint one by one. You have to come armed with ways to defend your idea.

    If it’s my opinion that’s different (I like purple, you don’t. I like London, you’d rather go to California, I think astrology makes sense, you think it is bunkum, you like Mother Teresa, I find her a bit sketchy, I don’t trust the new Sr. VP, you do) I don’t bother to defend that viewpoint. Not time enough in my day either. Let it roll. I know what I think and that’s fine by me. It’s a big world.

  11. Please listen to this video but start at 7 minutes in http://youtu.be/8-JXOnFOXQk

    It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

    If you are going to show up and be seen there is only one guarantee …..you will get your ass kicked!

    Then she said this….and It comes to mind almost daily…. I go back to it and I believe it!
    ** If you’re not in the arena also getting your ass kicked ….I’m not interested in your feedback!**

    These types you speak of kept me from being who I was meant to be for years ….. or maybe they didn’t, I just let them. I have had to stand against some tough critics over the last 5 years because of my business. People will just say anything and a coward will sit behind a keyboard and just blast a person because they think they are hidden …..and so its easy. They say the most ridiculous things that they would never say to your face. I keep working. I keep doing the right thing or what in my mind is the right thing. I know right from wrong. I AM willing to stand against the majority. It used to be frightening but today…. it is not.

    I am celebrating my 5 year anniversary this month. They wont stop me. Only I can do that!

  12. Defending yourself against anticipations of others is not only a waste of time, but actually leads to more misunderstandings. People think: “Oh yeah, they defend themselves with a lot of effort, this means we are right about them. We should’t listen. They are liars.” This is my personal experience. As I realized this I gave up on communication and let people think what they want. Yeah, this can make you feel terribly lonely and makes you feel that your life is all about your enemies.

    I come to the conclusion, that I shouldn’t feel pessimistic about this and look for enemies each time I enter a community. And I should show what I am and be stoic enough to listen to their misconcepts. Try to speak up for myself more and more but sometimes I just act out of routine and let people think what they want. They still have a right to think what they want, you know. And I have a right to be as weird as I am. :)

    Anyway: Thank you for this post!

    • There is something in what you say about defense. It’s a waste of breath. Take the action that you can. And bravo for not wasting time in defense when you can be singing your heart’s desire. Knowing what’s a waste of breath is very key for me and an e-x-t-r-e-m-e-l-y hard lesson. Are you saturn in sag?

  13. I had to learn how the politics work. It’s not worth getting killed about. Then I’m no good at all. The local political structure here is nothing to mess with. It’s controlled by a core of good ol boys. In my family, it was just as severe. A lot of collateral damage to people that really don’t deserve it. I’ve had to learn where to kick holes and with whom to move things forward. It’s not just having an opinion. It’s actually working to get something done. Opinions just show my hand and piss people off. It’s part of what I face in my locale, not being the property of a man. Very timely this morning. I need to do some re-aligning. I see it breaking down but it is a very slow process. It’s breaking down because it is working for less and less people. And the large and in charge, they are not the majority. They just got strings.

  14. It’s true a few weeks ago my nephew (only one I am in touch with) genuinely asked whether people believe in astrology, he has turned rampantly anti-religion but was genuinely interested. There were a few stupid comments about sad lives etc. I never talk astro on facebook I know it’s a bit futile and you get judged. But I got mad and posted his chart. I stated that it’s not a belief system. He studies music so I said ‘no-one asks ‘do you believe in music’. It’s just another discipline, whether the mainstream accept it or not.’ But I regretted posting his chart without a full interpretation. He found it to be only 50/50 ‘correct’. So I was on the back foot then. Taught me just don’t rise to it.

  15. Yes, I am. I have had to do it a lot recently. Relatively minor things in the grand scheme, perhaps, but I and no one else have to be able to live with myself.

  16. I’m pretty much always in the minority with my opinions and choices. However, I don’t think I’ve ever had to be completely alone in what I think is right. I will always find someone who agrees with me. They’re not always the same people agreeing with all of my opinions and choices, though.

  17. I have stood against the majority quite a few times, and lost a lot of people in the process. It can be a lonely place to be. Unfortunately, when I’ve gone against my own instincts as I did when my father got terminally ill, and bowed to pressure from his brother’s extended family to look after him 24/7, it ended badly in several ways. The really ironic thing about that is that my uncle’s own stepdaughters couldn’t even look after him (uncle) six months before they placed him in a nursing home and they had much more support from family and community than I had.

    A friend in high school sent me a letter telling me I was going to hell for believing in astrology. The funny thing was that I hadn’t really discussed it with her. Oh well.

    I tend to be very strict with myself regarding values and beliefs and not compromising my integrity, and sometimes it feels like the vast majority of people are much more flexible in that sense. A man I dated years ago had a Gemini friend who was engaged to be married, but who was cheating on his fiancee with another man’s wife. The friend asked my boyfriend to let him use his warehouse (where he built furniture) to tryst with this woman and it led to a huge argument between me and the boyfriend. I argued that if the guy wanted to cheat on his fiancee let him find somewhere else to do it, instead of the warehouse belonging to someone whose own wife had left him for another man. The boyfriend let him do it anyway.

  18. Oh dear Elsa, you must be reading my mind. I’m a capricorn stellium (sun, moon, saturn, uranus and neptune) and this question about standind for myself and for what I belive to be the righ thing to do is popping on my mind all the time latelly. And so I understand where you come from when you say you feel lonely on this, being the only person to back yourself up. What I feel is happening to me specially on this time is a reassurance of my beliefs, and I’m particullary feeling intensely tested and lonely right now. But I know this too shall pass, and our big father saturn always leave us with good gift after he makes us work. So I’m holding on the hope to get my lollipop after the dentist. =) Thanks again for this wonderful virtual place and for yours and Satoris comfortind and insightiful words.

  19. Love this conversation. I’ve always just KNOWN what’s true and what is not (Pluto trine mercury in aries in 8th?) which usually goes against the common wisdom. Rarely do I meet someone who thinks like I do and when I do, we both just know what’s what, so there’s not that much to say. Over the years (and I’m pretty old) I’ve learned it works out best to keep quiet, know what I know and steer clear of the crowd. I no longer look for approval from others which is a great step. Other people may be deprived of my wisdom but it seems like the majority out there only think about themselves anyway. Harsh observation but true.

  20. Ever spent tons of $ trying to defend yourself? It cost me a lot to learn what you described in this post Elsa. I had to walked away- I left shaking my head in confusion, with a bit of disgust hanging on as a side note. I said to myself, you gotta get away from these wackos! I was using too much energy to try and tell my detailed story.

  21. “Because of time and energy constraints I have to make choices. My choice is to remain undefined, like an inkblot. Then people call the blob whatever they wish to call the blob.”

    I do not want to have to make that choice about who I am, and where I came from.
    But, I now have to. Because there is no possible way to prove whether or not they are my family. So, I now have no heritage until I am given some kind of solid proof. A DNA test.
    No heritage. No family.
    Just people who MIGHT be my family, and who live like they are superficially. And, a heritage that MIGHT be mine, with half of it outright ridiculous.

    I have the same problem, though my chart is not the same.
    I would trade almost anything for a different life.

    • I’m wondering if I was switched at birth.
      Which would explain the birth time, day, and location being astrologically accurate, and would explain why she insists I have to be her daughter, biologically, and why there’s photos going back to the hospital, and photos of her in the hospital before she gives birth… But, then so man, many signs that this is not my family.

      • A birth switch… Or, adoption at birth that is carefully covered up in a photo album… Either one of those would make the world make sense.
        And, in the latter case, such photographic evidence lacked… But, then I see it in an album over 6 months after I pointed out that I’ve never seen any photographic evidence in my entire life they had me before the age of one-year-old. Well, I looked in those albums before, and I looked at our photo collection in general before, so I’m not sure how she pulled this off. But, it does raise question if she found a way to fake this.

    • And, as you put it, it’s about right, and wrong, too, even in this manifestation of it.
      I wish these people cared more about honesty, facts, and ethics than their g** d*** public images!
      But, they care more about how it will affect their public image if I prove not to be theirs than about whether or not I am. So, pursuing the answers I need to not be depressed is off limits.

      The joys of being a disabled dependent. No options. No control. Stay within the limits those you depend upon set, or die.

  22. This seems like the perfect place to apologize. No, I am not strongly Saturnian and I could blame it on Mars in Libra where 6, count’em 6 of my progressed planets sit. However, I do believe in doing the right thing. Maybe it’s my Virgo or it’s just my soul. I don’t know, a week or so ago, I was a Big Fat Ass. I was drinking and apparently feeling confrontational. I did not go back and read anything, which I’m certain I got my ass reamed, If I did, I deserved it. Elsa, to you, I know you’re a strong heart but I was being disrespectful and to me that’s unacceptable. I love you all. I have learned so much on this blog and I was sullying the ground that helped me grow. Please forgive my shitty attitude. I was on a tear. Holy Lord was I ever. Kisses to you all and I apologize for inserting yuckiness into such a lovely growing place.
    xx- Elizabethe

  23. Elsa, you’re a gem. I only remember feeling “very full of myself”…from past experiences, this never ends well, if you know what I mean. And, yes, this IS good, the tribe didn’t decide to lynch me. Yay!

    • You’re a gem, yourself. Do you know I am going on 15 years of blogging and you’re one of about five people who have ever come back and apologized? It must feel really good. I know for sure it’s rare.

        • But….I DO get your point. I tried to tell myself, just don’t go on there again. It doesn’t matter. You will never see those people. Yeah. That didn’t work. I don’t see you or anyone else as faceless or nameless. I don’t feel hidden on the internet I actually feel more exposed. But none of this matters to what would I do in person? I would apologize. I have no problem with that. I certainly would never curse at you. I do believe I cursed at you. I’m pretty much horrified. Thanks for being Elsa P. and being the outstanding woman you are. I will attempt to not go all Uranian and such in the future. It ruffles my feathers and makes me upset and doesn’t represent me well.

          • I understand. It turned out okay, after you left. I didn’t enjoy it or anything, but there was no real harm done. :)

            Thanks for outlining your process behind the scenes. It’s nice to be seen as a human and meet another human! :)

  24. I oppose astrological definitions of traditional Sun Sign interpretations in the sense of the power of the Sun.
    Its all based on observations of the northern hemisphere sky BUT its the opposite down here in the southern hemisphere.
    I haven’t seen a lot of research done on this, probably because the bulk of the ancient worlds population were in the northern hemisphere, but from what I have observed in life lived in the southern hemisphere, The traditional interpretations of ego strength (Sun Sign) seem to be practically the other around. In other words, Aquarius sun sign down here in the southern hemisphere have strong ego and Leo less strong? what about when the sun enters Libra, the sun GAINS strength in this sphere of the globe, does this concept pan out in astrological research??

  25. thanks, E. It really sucks when you show your ass. Especially when it’s in writing. Yikes!!!! Terrible. ♥♥♥

  26. first house uranus and 12th house saturn (opposing sun in the 6th)

    I can completely relate. I m always the odd one around.

  27. It’s not the majority that I have a problem with. Do I agree not necessarily but I don’t feel pain in our disagreeing or their not approving of me. It’s the minority, those close to me and if I am pleasing them that gets to me. Stops me in my tracks. They have had the power to dissolve me to mush… But only because I haven’t owned my self worth. Only because I have let them. I’m just recently learning to be ok with me, to love and trust in me the way I do in those closest to me. Saturn is approaching my moon at the end of my 6th house. When it’s done their it will oppose my 12th house Saturn and my asc on the way to the ruler of my sun, Neptune in the 7th. BUT I’m in hope for possitive help here … Because in the process it will trine my chart ruler mercury in Aries:) hopefully this is a valid hope to have and not another Neptune moment:)

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