The 7th House And Projection In Relationship

From January 2008, I project my 7th house and guess what? So do you!

There were a lot of questions in the comments, I have started to address them here: Astrology Q&A – What if there is nothing in my 7th house?


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The 7th House And Projection In Relationship — 108 Comments

  1. Yes, I project. I don’t know exactly how I do that but with Venus, Pluto and Saturn there..I surely project.
    Perhaps, I look for people who are attractive, intense and serious about love and life. That’s like trying to find a needle in a hay stack, when the needle is actually me. I’m the one with those attributes after all.

  2. LOL! Love it, Elsa!! I have Taurus on the Descendant & Uranus in the 7th and I married a farmer/carpenter whose Sun is square Uranus. Now he has Neptune/Saturn conjunct in Libra in the 7th and I’m a Libra Sun sq Saturn and Moon conjunct Neptune! Hey, it works!!

  3. Mercury and Venus. If I see a cute guy with glasses who looks smart, immediately he becomes The One and I must have him for my own! When he turns out to be just another dopey guy with glasses…that’s disappointing.

  4. Pluto and Uranus in 7th — married a man who lived in a storage unit for 3 years! sounds disturbing but it was multi-level and as big as any nyc hutch. didn’t live with me ’til six months into the marriage. he’s a high maintenance plutonian virgo who is definitely eccentric — he’s hungarian, and I think they’re all crazy geniuses over there.

  5. Pluto/Uranus in the 7th. Buncha goddamned freaks.

    Okay, so I was reading just last night (!) about projection, the Shadow, and the 7th house from this lady: http://www.shadowdance.com/shadow/theshadow.html

    She says that if we’re consistently attracting stuff we don’t like in our partners, what we need to do is to embody those qualities ourselves so we’re not as attracted and attached to them in the Other.

    So, let’s say I’m attracted to closet sex addicts and people who can’t commit to lunch, let alone anything long-term. By her logic, I now need to become the unavailable one and I dunno, troll Craigslist for multiple one-night stands so I’ll no longer attract people like that. Elsa, do you agree? I really don’t want to embrace my Shadow to that extent, but honey, my usual MO ain’t working, either.

  6. Neptune in the 7th house here. Had a string of drug-addicted artists and alcohol dependent musicians whom I worshhipped for their talents when I was in my 20′s. UGh…no more…no way.
    So what..worship my own talents? good idea.

  7. Moon, Mars, Jupiter & Chiron in 7th. Mars usually predominates – I like someone I can spar with, but I’m not sure if I want to win the fight or not.

  8. All these Venuses in the 7th! So, anyone want to trade me their Venus for my Saturn? I’d even take a Mars, I think. I’ll throw in a moon opposition for free.

    If what I’m meeting with is a projection, I’m projecting 1) lack of relationships, 2) lack of appreciation, and/or 3) lack of loyalty. I’ve definitely been in love and been loved in return, but most of my life I’ve felt starved for partnership. But I think things are getting better as I get older.

    So, Avery, my MO isn’t working, either. But I guess I have come around to the idea that if I embody Saturn…the good parts of it…I won’t meet the negative side of it in others.

    Glad to hear, Kashmiri, that you and the SO have
    found each other and are happy. You give me hope!

  9. Thank you, Valkyrie…it took me quite some time to realize that I was happiest with another Saturn type, and not some flaky nutbar (my MO before my current relationship).
    There is an age gap between my SO and I (he’s the older one) and I know that he felt the same feelings you described in your post.
    Saturn in the 7th seems to me like a dance between independant living and partnership every single day.

  10. Mars and Saturn in 7th.. have always tended to choose dominant partners… very attracted to intensity.. not sure what else I project.. but I’m sure there are quite a few (have a grand cross so oppositions are in play?)

  11. Valkyrie,

    You’re not alone!

    But how do you solve this? The project thing has never been clear to me.

    If you’re projecting lack of relationships, then what does that mean and what can you do to change it?

  12. Vita, I’m pretty confused about it myself, and would like to hear from others. But as I understand it, projecting means that I fear/expect those very things I’m meeting with, which brings them about. So one way I’m trying to resolve it is by not fearing it, being okay meeting this again and again, and still having faith it could work out some day.

    I meet with dumb luck in other parts of my life, but this area has never been a free ride.

  13. Valkyrie,

    Those words could have come from my mouth exactly; especially the part of meeting with dumb luck in other parts of my life . . . what’s this about? I’d love insight. I thought projecting could be anything (not just fear). Maybe someone here (Elsa? Someone?) can give a good example.

  14. Planning to follow up on this… answer the questions, but yeah Vita. You can project anything. Does not have to be negative as I mentioned in the video. Venus in the 7th thinks the partner valuable and desirable and is dissociated to some extent around their own value.

  15. Great, Elsa. I will look forward to hearing more about how this works. Very confusing for me. My example (just one among many) is that I am verbal, communicative, capable of intimacy (good listener, affectionate, warm, etc…) but the last two men were not very good with intimacy AT ALL. So what is that? I am capable of intimacy and crave it but find partners who are not able to be? Hmm…

  16. Elsa if what’s in your seventh house is retrograde what does that mean GENERALLY? I’m lost in a sideshow funhouse w/all the funky mirrors????

  17. I get confused with the whole projection thing too. When i first read about it i thought what i give my moon away, but their my feelings, my emotions, i’m confused. But in an other i do look for someone who’s caring and homely (moon), able to teach me something (jup), different in some way (ura) and intense (plu). Most of the men i’ve dated have had at least one of these qualities. My current (and hopefully last but with uranus who can tell) man is a sag sun (jup) conj uranus (ura), moon in cancer (moon) and venus conj plu in scorp (plu). Fits pretty well i think. He has nothing in 7th but aries rules (he likes to spar too) and i have venus there trining his sun. The more planets in 7th the more need for or interest in relationship dyou think? Virgo is on my desc so i like to analyze relationships, like to see how they work or dont work. Synastry & composite i find fascinating.

  18. Oooh I do love this post on relationships, got Libra! I myself get confused on the whole projection thing. I dont have anything in my 7th and more heavy on the sqaure/conjunction aspects than oppositions.

    I do know I project my neptune/mars conjunction and my venus pluto conjunction. Im always falling for the artists or musicians who are intense, passionate,sexy or vague and dissappering. Im really trying to own this especially my pluto venus because boy do I know that is an energy I want to own! I must say I get confused trying to work out if im projecting or they projecting or both or neither.

    BTW havent had the chance to watch your videos recently elsa and it was so good and refreshing to see your smile again. Oh and the (capricorn) red looks good on you.

  19. yeah, actually having Venus in the 7th next to Saturn probably makes it even more difficult because it makes the other person (that for one reason or another we “can’t have”) so much more desirable…Bugger!

  20. If the chart rectification is right, I have pluto and uranus in 7H also…which makes sense…I tend to date eccentric types…lived in an RV and train caboose for a bit with one, another ex and I lived in a basement party lounge in LES NYC, lived in 1/2M$ home with another, and now with my fiancee, he lives in something larger than a gear locker & travels every other week for work…and we are planning on living together in a few months. All of my relationships (no matter how short or long) have been intensely plutonic for me…

    I used to project the uranian energy a lot, then two years ago had an epiphany via a conversation with a long ago ex that I was now owning it. Odd….

    Best to all!

  21. One thing I’ve come to realize with 7th House Saturn is that my relationships need to be dedicated and disciplined.
    My SO’s Saturn is conjunct his Sun; mine is in a Grand Trine with Neptune/Venus Mars conjunction, also squared my Sun.

    I won’t speak for what he needs to be disciplined/dedicated about (that’s his life) but I can say I need to be dedicated to
    (a) not being delusional about what my partner is supposed to *be* (Neptunian)
    (b) not imposing on my partner how he is supposed to love me (Venusian expectations) and last but not least
    (c) not going ape-shit when things don’t go my way (Mars call to action).

    Saturn in 7th has, above all, taught me to love myself. Not easy when it squares Sun (or conjunct Sun, like my SO’s).
    Once I realized I had a right to be a part of the world and it was just as easy for to me to be gentle with myself and love myself.

    And lest I sound like it’s easy and I have everything figured out, it is an uphill climb. Frequently. While love (Venus) comes easy, so does delusion (Neptune).

  22. lot of 7th house saturns here. me too. hadn’t thought of it in terms of projection, but my husband is a very hard working, practical, earthy fellow. very smart! and i know these are qualities i also have, but i often don’t connect with them directly. (i.e. no matter how hard i work, i feel like i “should do more,” etc.)

    hmmmm.

  23. Thank to this post I have learned that I have Saturn, Uranus (Aquarius Descendant) in my 7th house, whatever that means. I don’t project. My heart does. No matter how hard I try, this stubborn idiot always wins the battle against my mind. It must be enjoying pain and sea of tears. It would be nice if it allows me to fall in love with this kind, handsome and intelligent man who truly loves me. Or let me fly from flower to flower at least once in my life.

  24. Go real slow would you? I have my free chart from astro.com. I see what I actually have IN my 7th house. It is retrograde which I am supposing means ?SOMETHING? …and now folks are talking about what is on the cusp of it, confusing me even more.

    Gee, where does a girl look for her cusp???????

  25. @joana – thanks Joana for your response. I am Scorpio Rising, meaning what rides the cusp of my Ascendant is Taurus, otherwise known as my Descendant, is that correct?

    So – does this mean that I project earthy, solid, sensuality onto my partners? Meaning I see them that way, whether they are or not?????

    Okay, folks, how do we clear the air then of our projections and get to see how people really are?

    Does this mean that people are walking around looking at me as if I’m like something I’m not, which is why I get that ‘ho thing sometimes???

  26. ‘Does this mean that people are walking around looking at me as if I’m like something I’m not, which is why I get that ‘ho thing sometimes???’

    Dreamsareality that made me laugh! But yes thats possible. As we can project so can others onto us. And retrogrades are debatable, some astrologers dont think they make much difference but as someone with quite a few i think they do. They tend to work on a more internal level and things happen slower. I’m not too good at explaining but this site might help clarify..

    http://karma.astrology.com/retrogrades.html

  27. No planets in the 7th but, I do have pisces on the cusp, and neptune is conjunct uranus and saturn in the fifth, trining mercury and venus conjunction in the first and sextiling moon pluto conjunction in the 3rd. I’ve always seen my reationships with others as a sort of enrichment and learning experience. But, most of my relationships are very platonic, relating in a very connected emotionally and mentally way, but rarely ever physical. And they’re far and few between, I don’t date much. I’ve got a serious merging streak, being the hallmark of both my venus-neptune trine, neptune 5th house and neptune-ruled 7th house. not to mention all that scorpio-pluto. All in all, other people are just too damn colorful for me not to love. And least to say, since I’m without right now, it’s a big void, but as I’ve done for most of my life, I fill it with music and oil pastels. but who knows, I’m having jupiter over that uranus-neptune-saturn conjunction this year, so who knows!

  28. Ack, Elsa! Good timing. I was just thinking about this! I have Venus and Mars in the 7th house, both in Cancer no less… so I project a neediness onto others I prefer to disassociate with myself….

  29. between the 7th house mars and the aries venus i tend to look towards partners that challenge me. when i was younger any ol’ challenge would do and that got kind of unpleasant. i had a bad habit of picking people who fought and debated as a matter of course and ego and whatever rather than to get somewhere (non constructive conflict) and i played that game.

    when challenge disappears, my interest evaporates. suddenly the person doesn’t look like a partner anymore. if there’s no interest in growing/evolving the relationship (which i may have imagined in the first place as an act of projection) then there’s no energy feeding into it and little point to my feeding my own energy in- stagnancy really disturbs me.

    (and i can never tell whether i’m more interested in high intensity or extreme independence- the libra/aries pluto/venus opposition at work, i guess- i think i projected the pluto for a long time- looking for controlling people just to prove they couldn’t control me ;P)

    but i do prefer positive growth/constructive criticism/inspiring challenge to conflict for conflict’s sake. it’s how you use the energy. and easier to focus when you observe it at work.

  30. Mercury, Venus and Neptune. This is like learning a new language.

    Mercury- I am excited about learning but yesterday isn’t soon enough.

    Do I project impatience?

    Venus- I am OK with that.

    I like to believe that I project an acceptance of others that is unconditional. Do I project a calm balance that may be percieved as a lack of emotion?

    Neptune- Prentend I don’t like drama, but secretly enjoy witnessing other peoples drama. [Will however go out of my way to help others!] Suffer no delusions, but can usually spot it in others. Become stronger in stormy seas.

    I once was asked to not attend a men’s group. My friend invited me for tea and said Randamandar, you know Paul and I voted for you but some of the others felt that you did not belong because you don’t seem to have any problems to speak of and they are uncomfortable beacuse they do have problems.

    Do I project that I am judgemental?

    If I am lost in translation, I certainly would appreciate some guidance.

  31. Wow Wyrdling. This is me exactly. Though I have cancer at the cusp of my 7th/moon . . . project dependency and neediness…

    But I’d love to talk with you more and see how you reach a happy medium.

  32. Wyrdling – great description of how your 7th house Mars & Aries Venus operates: “when challenge disappears, my interest evaporates.”
    I can relate to that with Aries Moon/Jupiter and Taurus Mars in the 7th.
    I am just beginning to realize that so much of the conflict in my relationships is self-created. I woke up next to my boyfriend this morning, and thought to myself, “I feel bored.” It was just a normal fleeting thought, but later in the day I was questioning him about whether I bore him. Talk about projection!

  33. Alma, I’ve got Neptune on the 7th house cusp conjunct moon in capricorn. I usually project the neptune and play out the capricorn moon. I tend to see my partners as being dreamy, gentle, shy types at first. And after knowing them a while I ‘see’ them as impractical, passive and evasive. Big time projection. When I get to be neptune, my partners see me as the above too…and then I am the evasive one. Of course, I’m attracted to pisces/neptune and they are attracted to me. It’s all roses as long as the projections are kept intact ;)

  34. vita-
    i’m not sure it’s so much a happy medium as making sure when i swing out one way or another it’s in the service of keeping the vitality of the interaction and not some fear based response. fear of being controlled led me to have to “prove” i couldn’t, for example. there’s always extremes, in my experience, but simply owning the energies i project has been really helpful. “i need X in a relationship” and recognizing how i orient myself in that direction and becoming more conscious of it has done wonders. thinking of more positive alternatives for specific energies, particularly.

  35. I have Moon in my seventh. Two things:

    a) Florence Nightingale syndrome out the wazoo. I’m attracted to deeply troubled people. A couple of hugely bad experiences have curbed this impulse to some extent.

    b) If there’s a man in the room that no other women are paying attention to, you’ll find me in his lap within five minutes. (I know a couple other women who share this trait, but not too many of them.) This has actually worked out very well for me.

    I also like the advice about loving things within yourself… good stuff, that.

  36. Ewinbee,
    I have Moon in my seventh also – seem to attract men who had troubled childhoods. I guess most people have troubled childhoods, but I mean abusive, etc. Since moon is conjunct jupiter in my chart, I’m usually able to help them sort out their feelings and to make some sort of peace with their parents. I feel like that is part of my mission. By peace, it can mean reestablishing contact with their parents, or just coming to the conclusion that though their parents will never change, they can change the way they approach the relationship and deal with its limitations.

  37. What a great thread, Elsa and others are just cracking me up! I have nothing in the 7th house, so does that mean, as in the words of Jack Nicholson, “The good news is, I don’t Have a type”?

    I think we have contracts in this life to meet specific people, or at least certain types, in order to show us what we still need to learn. (I mean do you ever get feelings when you meet someone, sometimes instantly, that you have a strong connection already?) How many times have I banged my head in different relationship areas of my life over the same old patterns?

    Or at least that’s how it’s played out for me. And as much as I’d like to think that I have learned how to not totally fall for men who definitely have had common traits, feeling that if this person really loved me as much as I love them, that somehow, I would be complete, well the jury’s still out on that one. But at least now I am aware of what the main red flags are. (Flattering, Self assured, flattering, eloquent, vulnerable, alcoholic, worldly, sensitive, flattering…)Think I need to hook up with someone who lives in a storage bin ha ha!

    I actually have the endorsement from a close friend, of this man who I’m going to meet up with in a group, and he called me today in anticipation. But I’m already turned off by the fact that I’m pretty sure he lives day to day, can’t afford health insurance, as my friend helped him out with a cast…Help me, I don’t want to be a snob, and I like to think that it’s not blue collar workers that turn me off, just blue-collar attitudes, (you know, defeatist, glass ceiling stuff).

    But I do believe now, after much observation, that we really only attract people who are able to love us as much as we love ourselves. So that’s been my focus, infinite love and gratitude to me!

  38. dreamsAreality, With Taurus on the Descendant it is as if you have Venus in the 7th as it is the Ruler of Taurus. You project all things Venusian onto your partner. Not bad.
    Like Elsa said we can use negative or positive energy of the Planet to manifest the projection.
    Hope that helps. :)

  39. Hi, Mari. I was reading your post and saw that you had the same question as most of us do.

    “What a great thread, Elsa and others are just cracking me up! I have nothing in the 7th house, so does that mean, as in the words of Jack Nicholson, “The good news is, I don’t Have a type”?”

    What Sign is on the cusp of your 7th House? The Planet that rules this Sign is the energy that you will project onto others……for good or ill.

    I have no Planets in the 7th but Aries is on the cusp so Elsa says this is like having Mars in this House. “Period!”

    What is on your Descendant?

  40. Hi, Descendant is about 13 degrees Aires, closet planet below in 6th house is Jupiter at 8 degrees Aires, then nothing in 5th, nothing in 7th. Thanks, Jamie

  41. So you project the energy of Mars onto your partners. You have Jupiter in Pisces @ 8 degrees in the 6th? I also have Aries on the Descendant.

    This could imply that you are impulsive in relationships (jumping in too soon) or that you marry someone younger than yourself.

    If you are in the business of projecting you might
    say that your partner is too impatient or too daring while you are totally unaware that you display the same qualities.

    I like the story Elsa tells of “Shack Man”. It illustrates projection perfectly. :)

  42. Jamie, no it’s Jupe Aries 8 degrees but in 6th. But you’re right, I did once marry someone younger, and really young guys are constantly attracted to me

    And I Do jump in, at least, my emotions get out of control if I think I’ve met the ONE. Mars in Libra. Yes, I have been told that I project too much of my goodness onto other people, and I know I have fallen in “love” with the ideal instead of the reality. Yeah that story is a riot, not to mention the delivery!

  43. Yes, Mari. I can empathize. I was always “leaping before looking” but I think that I have that under control now. Where is your Mars?

    I remember when I used to waitress at this nightclub and this young soldier would come every night that I worked just to talk to me. My co-workers called him my “puppy” because he followed me everywhere. That was my damned Mars in Leo allowing him to hold my “train” as I walked down the red carpet. I’ve got that under control as well. :)

    If your story is anything like mine then I get the riot part… ;)

  44. If I have Saturn in the 7th, that means I direct that part of my personality to to others instead of owning the part myself. There are good and not so good parts of self that may be projected onto others. It makes sense to find someone else; relationship or otherwise to “be” that part for us, especially if we are not quite ready to own that part of our personality.

    If I have projected my own sense of authority onto others (giving up that part) that may mean I don’t use that ability and thus become more dependant or child like or find issue with that authority for another psychological purpose. The aim of astrology and psychology is to become aware of those unconscious processes so that we may not repeat the negative aspects of personality patterns. They are always there to test us, to act consciously or unconsciously in matters. Thats ok.

    I think you would make a very good psychologist Elsa, if you ever thought of taking up that direction. I am sure you have thought about it.

    kingsley

  45. Kingsley, this is interesting. Projecting is seeing one of our traits that we do or do not like in someone else, that we may or may not recognize belongs to us?
    But what do you call it if you have a quality, say honesty, and you will someone else to have that too, and you can see in their soul even as they are robbing a bank, you think, well he’s honest deep down and wouldn’t be doing this if there weren’t dire circumstances. His honesty’s just waiting to bloom. Is it still called projecting if you don’t give up the quality itself? or is it just too much Libra he he

  46. What about people with planets in their first house relating with people with planets in their 7th? Is this a good thing or not?

    I have most of my planets in the 12th and 1st.. while my oldest friend has most of her planets in the 7th. I find that she gets frustrated when I communicate from a vantage point of self. And I’ve noticed that she rarely does this. When others do the same I think it’s normal so I never understood this dynamic with her until recently. And I’ve seen some of the projection recently as well since I’m in her wedding and she told me that the dress I was interested in (she’s giving us some choice in the matter) was too boring for me and she doesn’t see me as so boring. It then confused me.. if it’s my choice then that’s the one for me because it’s elegant and little fuss.. but if it’s her choice I’ll choose a more out-there dress.

    In the last year or so I’ve become more aware of how my questioning of self – with planets hidden in the 12th and mercury in the 1st – has created a really draining and dysfunctional(?) dynamic with her and her planets in the 7th and 8th. I’ve started changing my language in how I phrase things in order to better relate to her and I’ve seen improvement.

    My ex also had neptune in the 7th and when pluto opposed my moon 2 years ago it also conjuncted his neptune. And of course the truth of our dynamic was exposed. (my ex would literally try to get me to smoke weed and to drink beer when things were starting to sour – drug his partner). I also had a great date with someone who’s venus was in the 7th.. but it was a weekend thing and then he had to fly back home. I’m wary of relating to people with planets in the 7th because of the projection.. when I already question the who and what that I am. But maybe this is natural to attract these people? Any thoughts?

  47. we all have a 7th house Liz, even if there are no planets in 7th, the sign and sign ruler becomes the descriptor of potential projection. The seventh house is the person whom we will hopefully attract by presenting our particular type of persona (ascendant). That is one theory of the 1st and 7th.

    kingsley

  48. Yikes me!!! Gemini on the 7th…Mercury in Libra!! I’m dieing of thirst here….I need some “water”. Somebody give me some water!!!
    :-)

  49. Moon/neptune in Sag in mine. Still sort of figuring this whole issue out, so I’m glad you’re talking about it :-)

  50. Kashmiri, when you say Saturn type, can you explain that? Also, if I’m not being too nosy, I was just wondering how much of an age difference? (maybe you remember big age difference between me and my guy – I keep wondering if I should feel like a perv. and why is it acceptable for the man to be a lot older, but not the other way around?)

    I am still struggling to understand all this stuff, but when certain things are said, I try to imprint them on my mind – so thanks Kingsley (post 58)

    I have Mars and Uranus in the 7th, (Pisces Asc.) so now I guess I have to go do some research to try to figure out what that means.

  51. I’ve got a basic question about projections. Let’s say you’ve got Jupiter in the 7th house. Do you project the jupiterian qualities onto others and see them as having these qualities, or do you embody these qualities, so that others see you as a Jupiter type? Or does the projection go both ways? Since the 7th house is a “meeting place”, it might go both ways, right?

  52. Conny, I’d say you project your Jupiter but others can see it in you. For example in the video (I think I talked about Shack Man.) I think he’s eccentric, others think I am eccentric for marrying him but I don’t see that because I have my eccentricity projected!

  53. I have come into the comments late here, however to answer Conny, the projection and attraction elements of the 7th house work in a variety of ways and depends upon the persons evolvement and other chart points.

    If you attract Jupitarian types, beneficial others into you world then, there will be psychologically driven reason for that. So to, would being a benefactor for others in your life and 7th house. One can embody the qualities as you say, however that may also be what is called projective identification. Perhaps the jupitarian quality for you are easier to express through someone else. If you like something about aniother person and you decide to enlist some of their good qualities and eventually incorporate them into your your own personality then something the 7th house will apply. There are ok ways to project and identify with others as there are also ways to negatively project parts of our personality that we are not keen to be aware of yet. Perhaps Jupiter in the 7th is about everyone else being ok and a belief that one is not as ok as them?

    k

    • Thanks Kingsley. I have Jupiter in the 7th and your insight rings true. People often say this about me, but I just made this connection to my chart. Weird.

  54. Moon in Taurus in the 7th and my SO has moon in Taurus in the 7th. I’m no Florence Nightingale by any stretch. He says it best when he says he could fall over dead from hunger or sickness and I’d only notice if I actually fell over him. That’s me. Living in my head and not noticing anything around me. On the other hand, he definitely mothers and nurtures me. Absolutely. No doubt at all. That’s a projection because I’m the most unnuturing person we both know (unless you count intellectual nurturing).

    My other big relationship had Pluto and Uranus in the 7th house in Virgo in the 7th house. I wasn’t projecting there because we had so much going on with our moon, Venus and Saturn that he absolutely wanted to take care of me (and did), but he definitely projected that Pluto and Uranus on me because I made him transform his whole belief system and career and I’m very independent, uncommital and eccentric. Basically I’m a Pluto/Uranian 7th house dream girl or as he says, his Lilith. LOL We still stay in contact.

    But, me embrace my 7th house Moon? Not going to happen. I can take care of myself if I’m alone but barely. It’s nothing I enjoy and I certainly do not take care of anyone else unless I’m dragged into it kicking and screaming. Even then, that is not going to last with me at all. I’ll sever any relationship that starts getting into that. It seems to suck the life out of me in less than a day. (Not good. My Libra goes right out the window and my Scorpio comes out in full force!)

  55. Taurus is ruler of my 7th house, and I have mars in Taurus. I married a man who has zero planets in Taurus. I have read that mars in taurus is not the most happy of placements. I have been married for 20 years. I will not pretend that we have not had our ups and downs, and major blow-outs (whole lot of them) but something keeps us together. Does this mean I project a Mars Taurus personality?

  56. I love the Shack Man example!! That’s awesome.

    I have Sun conj Saturn in Taurus in the 7th. (which aspects just about everything else in my chart) My SO is a financial manager in his company. He is very talented and creative (he doesn’t think so, though) – used to paint – but he stopped doing that and took a corporate job. Very very stable set-in-his-ways person. Hmmm… I wonder if this is how other people see me…

    Charlotte – “Mercury and Venus. If I see a cute guy with glasses who looks smart, immediately he becomes The One and I must have him for my own!”

    LOL!!!! I have Merc & Venus on the descendant. I have a thing for guys with glasses too :)

    Kashmiri – “Saturn in the 7th seems to me like a dance between independant living and partnership every single day.” <– I really like this! I never thought of it this way before. (I have Sat in the 7th. & my SO is also much older than me)

  57. Aquarius on the 7th house cusp Uranus being the ruler. Sharing the house with Pisces neptune being the ruler..
    Ex-husband had an Aquarius Moon
    Neptune ruling Pisces. He smoked cigarettes for the 1st 2 years of our marriage and I did not know it…(just one aspect)..I don’t like cigs
    and he was very good at hiding it..
    He was head of a small steel company and we had to project(neptune)our partnership(7th) in the public with a good image for business contracts..

  58. Another Saturn in 7th – Pisces. It’s aspected all over the place, but I don’t know if those aspects impact projection or not.

    I just ended a long marriage to a man 15 years my senior, and am now in an incredibly surprising and wonderful relationship with a man old enough to be my father.

    He treats me better than anyone ever has, and in a lot of ways has brought me back to life. After years of doing all the giving, I am overwhelmed at times. He goes above and beyond any expectation I have ever had. He treats me – the way I have treated those I love in my life. Is that projection? Feels like it.

    He reminds me – often – that I do not give myself enough credit for being what he calls “the whole package” as far as a partner goes. “You don’t have enough respect for yourself. See yourself the way the world sees you. The way I see you.” That’s Saturn in Pisces, I’m sure.

  59. Venus in Gemini in the 7th. I love someone who’s got more than one side to them. They’re clever and quick and know a million different things with a wicked sense of humor and changing from subject to subject seems like second nature. They have other things going on in their life so and they’re always hard to pin down. And they always have a story to tell me. This use to frustrate me until I realized that I do the same freakin’ thing and I actually enjoy it to no end.

  60. I have Uranus conjunct moon in the 7th. You’re right about Uranus–I only notice a guy if he’s “different”! But as I’ve gotten older, my freak shield has gotten thicker. (That’s only by the grace of some other aspect in my chart, I’m sure.)

  61. mars and pluto in 7th. I don’t even wanna think about it D:
    I seem to have a flair for pissing of people and attracting the same. Not good for well being nu-uh.

  62. Mikey,

    That has really cleared something up for me – have mars/pluto conjunct my sun and my best friend says I really piss alot of people off! She thinks I am very misunderstood – that my total drive for whatever I am interested in is misinterpretated as aggressive. In fact it is just a desire to learn about whatever interests me – I don’t really notice other people! So it could be the mars/pluto doing that. Good to know – still don’t care of course!

  63. Moon and Pluto in the Libra seventh. My Libra moon trine venus in gemini and my pluto conjunct descendant at 0’58″ and is squared by my Cancer Sun. I look for a refined, elegant and attractive surface coupled with inner depth and intensity. My current boyfriend is a handsome 4th house Scorpio Sun – 12th house Cancer Moon. However, that intensity got a price: sex addiction. It’s not funny as it sounds.

  64. mars and saturn in 7 house means what exactly in psychological terms is still a mystery . Both are conflicting energies . True they are attracted to intensity, action and also maturity and responsibility but it has to be something more than that.

  65. what if we have a sign swallowed up in the 7th house? I use koch/placidus they show the same placements for me. Aquarius intercepted in the first, leo in the 7th. Descendant in cancer

  66. I have Venus & Saturn conjunct in Scorpio, and Mercury & Neptune conjunct in Libra all in my 7th house. The first time I had my chart done, my astrologer (also a friend) asked me what the hell I was thinking?? This spot in my chart has certainly presented me with a lifetime of lessons in sorting out relationships (probably as much if not more of an influence than Sun/Moon/Ascendant, although they’re all in the mix, of course). I hadn’t ever looked at it through the lens of projection, but there’s probably some insight there.

  67. elsa, i would use equal but both koch and placidus ring more true to me in respect to my own natal chart… saturn & uranus which were in my 11th house (koch/plac) are moved to my 12th house, which I’m not quite sure of. Moon & Mars in the 3rd with equal.. while in koch/plac they’re placed in the 2nd.. and aqua/leo is intercepted in both systems. i’ll have to do some more research on the house systems though i suppose. It’s hard to differentiate moon/mars in 3rd from 2nd because i have jupiter in gemini and that makes me rather talkative in general.

  68. Aries Moon in 7th house conjunct Desc.

    I want my men to mother and nurture me. If they don’t do that, then I have to mother and nurture them instead. Without that interaction my relationships don’t survive.

    Also, and this is possibly because my 7th house cusp is Aries, the chase is better than the catch. When there’s no challenge in a relationship, I lose my interest.

    Funnily enough I also see almost every other woman as a mother type, but not myself. I feel like I wouldn’t be a good mother. Every man I’ve ever been with tell me otherwise, they’re all 100% sure I would be great.

  69. Maybe my Jupiter in the 7th explains how I can so effortlessly be beneficial to others even as my life falls apart.

    I made a note of that in another thread. Maybe this explains it.

  70. I have an empty 7th house natally.
    But I have jupiter and Uranus in my seventh house at 29 degrees right now…What does that mean Elsa?

    An old flame has come back every day he shows up and now Venus is going retrograde..The pain we went through is not being discussed he is just here everyday making me so confused! I still care about him and it is making things uncomfortable for me!

  71. I have Sun and south node conjunct in the 7th as well as mercury and chiron – Uranus is 7th house ruler – my sun is opposite Pluto which makes me interested only in powerful successful and eccentric men – never married so not sure how this will work out.

  72. Leo on the Cusp, Uranus Pluto Virgo 7th.

    I attract the weird ones who want a committed relationship with me immediately. I’m supposed to follow rules, but they don’t have to. One alcoholic, one psycho, both pathological liars. Both relationships started strongly suddenly and ended completely in a sudden way.

    I’m still trying to figure out how to attract someone who is fun, plays by relationship rules, is committed and interesting without him being a total freak.

  73. I have Chiron in my 7th house. I am drawn to sensitive, wounded types. It would be a real shock for me to have my own woundedness out there, in the open, for others to see.

  74. Oh Boy, What a mess! Uranus/Libra & Pluto/Virgo in 7th. Sun,Venus, Merc & South Node tightly huddled together banging on the front door in Leo. Do I project? You bet your sweet ass I do.

  75. I have mercury (chart ruler), jupiter and neptune in my seventh…i havent read all the comments lol so i apologize if i repeat someone….i always seem drawn to people who are highly spiritual mystical creative otherwordly into music or on drugs or downtrodden…thats neptune… but also hilarious and generous and larger than life…also tall men. Thats jupiter. and they have to be smart and its important that we enjoy eachothers minds and are on a similar or same wavelength…ive also gone for the older younger relationship both sides… thats mercury. so you are saying some or all of these are inherent in me. since like attracts like real recognizes real etc. interesting stuff

  76. I have an empty 7th but with Virgo on the cusp. This makes sense to me because I am always attracted to curious, writerly types.

  77. I have leo on the 7th house with no planets therein. Its horrible because I am so awkward around these types, I can’t get what I want. I like feisty, diva type women who have a mind of their own. I don’t even have a fixed start there sadly :( I do attract those types too in some sense but strictly plantonicaly cause I get a bit scared. One girl I was recently talking to on/off is a leo moon and a capricorn , the the capricorn wasn’t her nature really because she doesn’t want to work and will never have to work, she has a rich dad! So she is biding her time till he dies! lol!

  78. Oh my. Now I see things more clearly. I have Mercury, Uranus, Pluto, and the Sun in my 7th house (Virgo). Having my sun sign in the seventh house makes identity and boundaries pretty tricky already. Throw in Uranus and Pluto and I fall in love with eccentric, egotistical, charming, unconventional trouble makers. They think I am unconventional at first, but then find me to be too much of an earthy virgo in the long run. (Two marriages and three intense love affairs find me single as I enter my 50′s).

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