From 2008 in regards to assimilating trauma / Pluto transits – shell writes on Will It Take 10 Years To Assimilate:
“Is that kind of like when something happens in your life that is painful, and you think you’ve learned a lesson and will be better equipped to handle it the next time around; yet when it happens again, it still hurts like hell and you have a brain fart as to how to handle it productively? And the second time around, you have baggage from the first time which only adds to the backache? Yeah, I could see how maturity would be the only thing to help. But that only goes so far, huh?”
shell – That is not what I meant but I think this is interesting. Being thoroughly familiar with trauma of most kinds I do understand it’s nuance and fact is you do build up a tolerance to whatever it is that is happening.
For example if you are a battered woman you do in fact get used to getting beaten but if you ever manage to stop the beatings… if you get away for a few months and then one way or the other find yourself back in a situation where you are being beaten again, I think the effects can be worse than ever.
It’s sort of like an alcoholic. They get sober but God forbid if they start drinking again the problem becomes worse than ever. So I think is akin to what you are talking about but I am talking about something else with this second go-round Pluto transit.
Pluto transits by their nature are unfathomable so if you happen to have one (a big one, like Pluto transiting in hard aspect to one of your personal planets) when you are a child you are going to play hell trying to understand and cope with it. You will do it of course (in most cases) but as far as being able to have any kind of perspective on your experience, well it’s not going to be possible.
This would be especially true with a transit from Pluto to the Moon when both planets are by their nature is very yin, internal, and personal because chances are no one is going to know what is going on.
So you get through the period and over the course of whatever number of years (15-20 in my case) you assimilate your experience. And then here comes the second transit which absolutely relates to the first and I guess where I differ from shell’s characterization is with the word “baggage”.
I do not feel burdened by baggage in any way shape or form. What I feel is keen and sophisticated. I feel like a specialist but you know what they say – Ignorance is bliss! I have never heard anyone say “Being a specialist is bliss” have you? ::smiles:: So this is what I meant. I can put such a fine point on trauma… well I may very well be world class on this front and I can give you an Aquarian analogy.
My ex-husband, Shack Man was an audiophile and I have found many with Aquarius Moons to be. He had a stereo that was out of this world and guess how he bought his couch? He bought it by EAR height. That’s right. He wanted his ear at the exact level of the speakers so when he went couch shopping his brother went with him, tape measure in hand. He proceeded to sit on couches and have his ear height measured until BINGO!
So this is how it is for us specialists. We’re into our thing in ways normal people would never imagine and no matter how we may to try to tell you, we can never do more than scratch the surface which is why I am beginning to really embrace the idea of multiple lives.
Besides the soldier’s experience (it’s coming and it’s compelling) it just makes sense to me because I know how much I have to say or to write and I will never ever get it done so what? The knowledge dies with me? Somehow I doubt that. I probably be back. I’ll just get born and start talking all over again as if I never stopped in the first place.