Virgos And Criticism

July 21st, 2011 @ 6:44 am by Elsa

Ask the collective

There is no debate that Virgo is a critical sign. Whether this is a boon or a bust for people who interact with them depends on the Virgo. For example, I work with Virgos (The Mechanic and HQ). They are both critical thinkers with keen minds and I feel fortunate to have the opportunity to run my ideas through their filter.

Virgos are efficient and can save you a lot of time and pain. The have the ability to catch your errors on all levels and provided you can bear this, you’ll be helped and often tremendously. I realize there are people who want to make their own mistakes but there are circumstances where mistakes are costly. For example you don’t want to print a million copies of something that contains a typo so in a case like that, it’s foolish not to run your copy by a Virgo.

On the other hand, I have definitely met Virgos who are absolutely insufferable. They can’t go three feet without criticizing you (or themselves) and they feel all pristine about it too.

What are your experiences with Virgos and criticism?


Ask the Collective, Astrology, , , 59 comments   |   Posted at 6:44 am 

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59 Responses to “Virgos And Criticism”

1.
Emerald
Emerald

Virgo rising here…
I am critical to myself and to other people.
My bestfriend Sun Aquarius/Libra moon… woah!
She hates my criticism… she get too defensive at times when I am only trying to help. ;-)

 
2.
McKenna
McKenna

If used constructively, with balance, it’s a boon. If not? It can lacerate your Soul.

Thanks Elsa.

 
3.
Josi
Josi

LOL, I understand exactly what you are saying and don’t think I’m pointing all fingers at Virgo suns because I have Virgo venus and I could pick apart the BEST love relationships and be like..all justified and stuff.
Ox is the mega-virgo. He is critical. His approach flat out sux (just like mine :) ) and we are working on it. After I got over his abrasive approach and actually started listening, I realized that not only what he was saying was absolutely true; it was also beneficial!
for example, we bought a big fish tank (40 gallon–thats big to me, but of course Libra got it for a song and a dance..so). The tank had to be ordered and when it was to be picked up, he was unavailable. Which means, I had to go get it.

You might not know this, but with Mars conjunct Uranus I often get in a hurry and try to do things way ahead of my own good sense and the result of that action has been many demolished vehicles over lots and lots of bones and uncountable bruises, scars from stitches and staples..you name it. My motto..if they can build it, I can break it.

Given that knowledge, as we were standing in the pet store disccusing our options about how to retrieve the tank when it came in, the sales person is watching us. Ox is telling me..think about this..be careful about this..don’t forget this..bring this for padding and blah blah blah.

Now, the sales person watched me go from calling all the shots on design, price and equipment and in his view I then all of a sudden took the stance of belittled spouse as my S.O. kept bringing up these because, “he thinks you are too stupid to come up with these things? he doesn’t trust you?” (he said that when I picked them up)

From my perspective, I thought nothing of the discussion. Agreed with the tips that Ox gave and even wrote them down in my handy dandy notebook I was carrying around to take notes in.

I go back to the store with all of Ox’s tips in mind accompanied with the excitement of having a something we have been saving and planning for. The salesperson meets me and expresses his thoughts (above).

I laugh, and say, you don’t understand. He KNOWS I would be all excited about getting this thing home that I would rush around and not think about this or that and he is right. That’s why we click. You know? I’m the idea person. He’s the reality person. I come up with it, he comes up with a way to make it work. I respect his input as helpful advice. He respects my input as a new perspective. it works because we have learned not to be defensive about it. We are a team with the same goal. We work together :)

guy was like..ok..whatever.

but yeah, they can be some picky folk sometimes. I’ll give ya that :)

 
4.
Josi
Josi

oh, and word of advice..if you plan to plant a “wild flower garden” you might want o make it clear to Virgo that wild flowers ARE technically weeds. Otherwise you are going to come home one day to find Virgo all proud sitting and gazing at your newly cleared (as in pristinely empty) wildflower bed expecting praise because he had the gumption to weed it for you.
LOL
I’m still laughing over that one!

 
5.
acaseofsunburn
acaseofsunburn

I’m a Virgo sun with Virgo rising. I am very critical of myself. I’m always assessing things, but try not to verbalize it to others. Not sure I’m doing a great job though. My husband says I’m very critical and the glass-is-half-empty kind of person. It cut me to my core when he said this. Maybe I let down my guard around him and things come out and I don’t even realize it. I feel like I’m being honest, not critical. I’m a work in progress, with a long way to go.

 
6.
dolce
dolce

My guy has a Stellium in Virgo including his Sun and he is practical to a T. So reliable and helpful, sees through everything. Honestly he is very hard to trick. Throw in his Sag rising and Leo moon and he’s tons of fun on top of it :)

 
7.
milano
milano

I definitely think Virgos can be critical, but they make up for this with all of their good qualities like service, knowing how to do things well, and being generous with their time and energy. I have Virgo on the 4th house so I tend to feel right at home with Virgos.lol

 
8.
milano
milano

Also when they’re critical it’s usually because they want the best for you/a situation

 
9.
Josi
Josi

“Also when they’re critical it’s usually because they want the best for you/a situation”

very true

 
10.
Nota
Nota

They can dish it out… but only a few of them can take it. They can and will freak out.

 
11.
JASIME
JASIME

My other half has his north node in Virgo, in the 4th house…when stressed and un-balanced the criticism start pouring out the moment he has stepped in the house after work. Ive come to realise that there’s hyper-critical and then there’s ‘ Virgo Critical ” …

 
12.
Rkkggg
Rkkggg

Nota, that is the gospel, right there.

Libra Sun (Libra almost everything, actually) here, and in my experience Capricorns and Virgos are the most judgmental signs, but I’ll take a Cap over a Virgo any day of the week. Why? Because Caps will think you’re wrong and tell you so, but they don’t really *care* that you’re wrong. They’ll happily be all, “Go on and be wrong. Why do I care?”

Virgos, though? Well, they think you’re wrong and they won’t stop until they can get you to admit that you’re wrong, and if you won’t, then they look down on you from that point forward in a superior way that is just insufferable.

As a Libra, that attitude really grates my cheese. :P And yet I’m always surrounded by Virgos. It’s my karma, I guess. ;)

 
13.
catfishmass
catfishmass

I’ve found the rising Virgos to be more critical/persnickety in general. Overall I heart my Virgo peeps, they’re the rarified few that can pick me apart (and I mean that in a loving way.)

 
14.
notch
notch

So would this Virgo be critical if she posed that wildflowers are not weeds but food for wildlife.

But I must admit that my wildlife food beds are right now infested with invading non wild grasses. It is so hot I am moving a lamp outside attached to an extension cord so I can garden at night.

Am I freaking out or having a conversation?

 
15.
Elsa
Elsa

Welcome, JASIME . :)

 
16.
Jennifer
Jennifer

“On the other hand, I have definitely met Virgos who are absolutely insufferable. They can’t go three feet without criticizing you (or themselves) and they feel all pristine about it too.”

This statement describes my Aunt perfectly. My cousin says she is an enneagram 1. I am enneagram 9.

 
17.
starkttn
starkttn

Virgos make better friends than bosses. Sometimes their nitpicking feels helpful and sometimes it makes me want to crawl in a cave and cry. I can be hard on myself, but Virgos will tell you exactly what needs to be fixed without you asking.

Unfortunately, they are usually right…

 
18.
Skye
Skye

I think it depends on the Virgo and expression of energy but number 1 person in the world is a Virgo and I wouldnt have it any other way :) Never misses a detail and always the first to admit fault. The Virgos I have met have always been humbling :)

 
19.
CLD
CLD

I got stuck on Josi’s “If they can build it, I can break it” – made me laugh and smile :-) I had a sister like that :-) lol So cute.

I’ve got a stellium in Virgo in 4th. I KNOW, don’t yell at me please. My Dad was a Virgo Sun. Basically, with this Virgo/criticism question, I don’t even know where to start :-) You’re all doing great with answers so I’m just reading and nodding LOL

 
20.
Josi
Josi

this is also very true, Nota.
“They can dish it out… but only a few of them can take it. They can and will freak out.”

 
21.
Isernia
Isernia

Several comments stated above pertain to my one Virgo friend. She is in the business of giving advice, and it is always from the “glass half-empty” viewpoint.

She gets snotty if you don’t automatically agree with her assessment of the situation.

She berates people for doing the very things she does in her own life. I believe that if you are going to put yourself in the position of helping others fix their lives, your own life should be somewhat organized first. Otherwise, why should I listen to you?

 
22.
notch
notch

The stretch for virgo “I think” is not necessarily saying what I think. Understanding who I am in conversation with and what their sensitivity level is.

And also relinquishing my responsibility for outcome. If someone is hell bent on heading for destruction, not only getting out of the way, but not getting involved. I don’t have to clean it up. Foresight helps in staying clear of calamity and out of danger (other chart factors of course). Risk assessment is one good use of analytical ability.

 
23.
McKenna
McKenna

@notch… I’m still laughing at your first comment “Am I freaking out or having a conversation?” ;)

@Nota… never a truer word was said! Quite capable of doling it out but cannot cop it back.

At All.

 
24.
JASIME
JASIME

Thanks Elsa :) Nice to be here.

 
25.
Kashmiri
Kashmiri

My best friend when I was a teenager was a Virgo Sun, Taurus Moon. She was a very loving and supportive friend. She was very hard on herself though she was never hard on me.

I moved to a new town and was so depressed I became suicidal and she would write me a letter every week to cheer me up. It didn’t really work at the time but I have kept almost all of those letters–they were so full of love.

She died 13 years ago today and I still miss her.

 
26.
Conoco
Conoco

Sorry, but I can’t handle too much criticism. Maybe I’m egotistical? Oh well, if I am then at least I’m honest and at least I don’t criticize others (at least not too often).

Criticize me too harshly and you’ll end up emotionally wounding me.

 
27.
Charlotte
Charlotte

I’ve got a lot of Virgo (moon and rising, Sun in the 6th) and while I could go on forever with criticism of others it does not even compare to how hard I criticize myself. The reason I think Virgos and their criticisms have such bad reputations is because they are usually right. But I’m biased lol.

 
28.
beth
beth

One thing I notice is that a lot of people seem to think Virgos look down condescendingly on others from their thrones of righteousness.
This is true sometimes, more for some Virgos than others but it’s not always the case.

Often our thought processes go: “AArgh! An error! Sitting right there, staring me in the face. Must fix and restore the rightful order of the universe!”

 
29.
sunshine30
sunshine30

I have venus in Virgo, and yes, I can be critical. I think I have a knack for addressing things with a cushion of compassion, though.

 
30.
anita
anita

Why is most of this post funny to me? The aquarium story was a hoot and both gardening experiences….a light at night to garden? ha!

My father was a Virgo Sun. He was a gentle workaholic (alongside my mom, a Capricorn). I felt like an employee all my childhood. I was. They meant well, but I grew up terribly alienated and sad (lots of fire, hardly any earth in my chart).

My dad loved garage sales in his later years. He would buy garden tools and clean and paint them, so they looked oh-so-nice.

When we had fireworks displays on the 4th of July, he cleaned up the street of the fireworks remains and put them in the indoor fireplace.

I have a Virgo midheaven with fire and water influences and I have anxiety about a variety of things (oh, I don’t know, say, fireworks in the fireplace, perhaps?).

 
31.
CLD
CLD

Anita…that is so funny “I felt like an employee growing up” lolol Me too!!!! I used to say, half-joking, that my parents had kids just so they could have slaves :-) (Dad was Virgo, Mom was Taurus)

 
32.
Merryweather
Merryweather

My niece is a Virgo, and yes, she is uber critical. But she’s also one of the most caring individuals I’ve ever met. And if I need an objective, critical opinion on something, she’s the first person I go to, because I know she’ll be completely honest and dead right.

 
33.
paulo
paulo

Critical rising here. F*ck!ng ring sign… i already criticize myself, no need for third parties bugging me. Mega critical.

Mercury is also my most aspected planet with 13 aspects… and have moon on 6th house.

 
34.
paulo
paulo

rising*

 
35.
Shannon
Shannon

I love Virgos. They help me keep the details square, which my unfocused brain appreciates!

 
36.
anita
anita

CLD, I hear you! We should start a “Children of Earth Signs” healing group!

In regards to the self-criticalness of Virgos, it’s self-defeating, and it’s so natural it can’t be stopped. A good friend has a Virgo Moon and she constantly questions her own truth and worth. Then other people at work criticize her beyond necessary…really upsetting experiences…and she takes it in and works it around in her brain unmercifully. She can’t let it go.

 
37.
caribou
caribou

Yes, Anita, so true! :-)

My Dad was very soft hearted. He meant well but felt no matter what he said or did he would get hell for it. He closed himself off a lot as a self-protection thing. Just thinking about this today makes me want to hug him but he’s gone now. He was often hurt by people. Virgos might be critical but it’s really hard to not be who you really are. And usually they mean well.

 
38.
D
D

Ouch! Five planets in Virgo with a Leo sun; highly efficient and helpful. Critical, yes, BUT, if you have enough emotional intelligence you can direct mistakes and teach others the way to go about things, in a way that does not hurt or intimidate them. I try to focus on the better part of being Virgo.

My beef, my Virgo moon. Booooooo…

I don’t understand it, but I still try my best!

 
39.
anita
anita

I love Virgo energy…I hope I don’t hurt anyone with my comments (worrying here….). It’s the human condition. I’m trying to be light about it nowadays. It seems that everything has become a joke to me.

 
40.
notch
notch

This is a good conversation. All things virgo.

I am wondering if virgo is impossible to indoctrinate or for very long anyway. It is a common theme amongst my virgo sun friends. We cluster or cloister. In company jobs, it seems the beef is that it is not enough to do the job and do it well but that they are expected to buy onto some kind of political, religious, or social creedo or at least pretend to. There is a soul eating feel about it. Not doing so, they feel (believe it or not they have feelings) they are marked the enemy. But it makes for good cloister humor. It sure beats crying about it.

And it sure makes me appreciate good working environments. Yup I’m picky about that all right.

 
41.
DaftAida
DaftAida

Libra Moon, here. With mercury and pluto in virgo, find it true that people don’t want advice (doesn’t stop me giving it though)or solutions to their problems in context with the world’s problems. Can sound like a dictatorial character flaw assesment if not provided sensitively. Always best to ask; what do you think you should do about it? See if this leads to a request for advice.

 
42.
DaftAida
DaftAida

When you’re perfect and can see the fine details weaving the big pattern which others miss in all the drama, it’s impossible not to be critical(half jest!). But seriously, sometimes the correct course of action is so obvious, so logical, so common sense that, having provided the solution one can be driven to excasberation as failure unfolds because people stubbornly refuse to consider the facts in light of circumstances. The virgoen skill of discernment and distinction is at its weakest in the emotional minefield of human relations, however. This blind spot is a source of much pain as Virgos are driven to serve others. As the head should not rule the heart, but guide it wisely, tallying up measures in emotional currency does not equate. I feel fortunate to have a Mercury Pluto in Virgo sextile Venus in Scorpio in this respect. However, there is no end of criticism for beaurocratic numbskulls messing with my and others lives!

 
43.
DaftAida
DaftAida

Have you noticed that so many bottle blondes happen to be Virgo? I think it’s interesting that Virgo represents anal-ysis! They can also be neurotically hypondriac occupying the health zone of the zodiac. I’ve 4 planets in Libra.

 
44.
sharon
sharon

I adore Virgos. Almost every best friend I’ve ever had has been a Virgo… and of those, the vast majority have had their Suns in the last decanate of the sign.

The only one I found to be hypercritical was one I became friends with at work, and she called me when I was visiting another friend just to pick at me. Our friendship ended shortly after that; she did, however, call me a year later to invite me to see her new baby, and after that visit called me to tell me she disapproved of my new boyfriend. Because of his age (five years younger than me). The funny thing was, when she and I had been friends she tried to set me up with men that much younger!

 
45.
katrina
katrina

I’m a Virgo Sun and what I find interesting about the various opinions on this thread is that the two harshest came from people with a lot of Libra, the “nicest” sign.

 
46.
Mooseman
Mooseman

Wahoooo virgo! You never hear anything good about us :)

 
47.
caribou
caribou

This entire thread helped me understand why out of 7 people in our family, when Dad was sad, *I* was the one they sent to talk to him. Even when I was little. With all my virgo in my chart, must have been that he heard me and it helped. I don’t know for sure. Really wish he were alive today so I could hug him. This thread just made me cry.

 
48.
Alice Brown
Alice Brown

I am a Virgo myself…..what i feel is Virgo people do have flaws, no-one in this world is perfect. My biggest flaw is that i am a short-tempered person but somehow i manage to control it. People don’t find me that negative or filled with flaws. I am human i have flaws but very few….thanks for the share..!!

 
49.
dorchid
dorchid

I can’t help but add my favorite movie portrayal of Virgo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pDEpAGRCAFA&feature=player_embedded

 
50.
Moni
Moni

I work in a law firm where all the paralegals are Virgos and stubborn as hell. I have a Leo sun with 5 planets in Virgo, including south node. Virgos are the masters of details, details, details. I find creative types usually mess up on the details. I’m always cleaning up someone else’s mess, and it drives me crazy. My Virgo stellium keeps my exuberant Leo sun down and acts as the proverbial wet blanket. Too much Virgo is also not good for love relationships, because it analyzes the relationship to death. my Virgo stellium is helpful for my job, but not for real life.

 
51.
Mandy
Mandy

My last boyfriend was Virgo. I knew when he was being self-critical in his head because he would project it onto me (word for word I’m sure). The last one was “Is that the best you can do?” regarding something really insulting, and I realized “No, you’re right, I CAN do better than you.” Haven’t seen him since.
My daughter is Virgo. If it’s not perfect, look out.

 
52.
eris
eris

i do pretty well with virgo. but i have the ascendant. i have a lot of practice with it. and how to try to be fair about it.
someone’s pluto in virgo is really driving me crazy though. they’re really unconscious about it and project it a lot :/ and i’m a good target.

 
53.
eris
eris

first house pluto in synastry = right ol’ pain in other people’s shadow :P

 
54.
Rachael
Rachael

@Nota … They can dish it out … *snort*

I’m involved with a person who has a Virgo stellium … Man, oh man … We need to have scheduled days when I can be whiny, so that we’re not both being self-indulgent at the same time. haha

 
55.
Rachael
Rachael

dorchid …. Dewey Decimal System … BWAH …. thanks for the smile :)

 
56.
notch
notch

Hi CLD, I call what you describe being the last one standing. It’s what makes virgo a great friend. And it’s why this virgo always has virgo friends.

 
57.
Meredith
Meredith

I have a friend who is a triple Virgo–Sun, Moon and Ascendant. She is very reality based, which is interesting for someone who exhibits an attraction to the occult. She started trance work saying she can’t do it so often everyone started smiling when she said she couldn’t do something else as well. Eventually, she mastered it as she most likely masters everything she puts her mind to. When a group of friends wants to go somewhere, if she vetoes a destination or a restuarant, it’ll never happen because she’s immovable. She hates it when someone doesn’t have a preference–because she always does! Yes, she’s rigid and stubborn, but can also be very kind. And she can be counted upon to take the best notes ever. :)

 
58.
caribou
caribou

Notch, forgive my brain thickness …so who is the last one standing?

 
59.
notch
notch

Hi CLD, being the one that was there for dear old Dad. When I read your account, I felt it in my bones from top of the hierarchial chain downward as one looked to the next to the next to the next helpless, until all eyes were on me with that “Do Something” look. There is always the choice to spit in the eyes, but no can do, can I?

My dad’s mars was in virgo. Besides one taurus moon, my bio family lacked earth energy something terrible. Full of air. Oh well, gave my air Mercury a workout. aaargh!!!

 


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