Astrology And Narcissism
“God has given you one face, and you make yourself another.”
–William Shakespeare
Self aggrandizement and vanity are not Narcissism. To understand the reality of Narcissism you must understand its root, the rejection of the true self. When Narcissus looked in the pool and fell in thrall with his reflection this was not self-love. To understand this archetypal myth one must understand the nature of mirrored reflection. The reflection is not the thing.
Narcissus is not a tale of self-love; it is a tale of self-rejection. Narcissus “fell in love” with his false-self reflection. The reason he rejected real-life suitors is that he rejected his real self in favor of a non-real self. A reflection is shallow. It has no substance and therefore cannot love. True Narcissism is the early rejection of the true self in favor of a made-up self.
There is no self-love in Narcissism; there is only aggrandizement and vanity of the false-self, the image they have chosen to embrace over who they really are. Over time when the connection to the false self is solidified the connection to the real self is lost. The reason Narcissism is so impossible to treat is that over time so much of a person’s energy has been spent in creating and upholding the false self that the real self has fallen so far behind in development that it is no longer a viable option.
Now here’s how to parse this astrologically. Consider the person as a metaphorical car. The true self is the driver. The false self is the back seat driver. The true self embodies all the energies of the natal chart, the driver. Consider the back seat driver to have a made up chart, one that has been picked out of the air, not a real set of energies that can be accessed. The driver takes the car out based on the very real energies in their natal chart and transits that chart experiences, but it is the back seat driver that gets out of the car at the destination and interacts.
There are no chart placements or aspects that spell out narcissism. There are, however, challenging aspects that can result in the condition if not well-met. In sign quincunxes between Pluto or Chiron and personal planets are ripe for this challenge. That does not mean the person will become a narcissist. What it means is that they are faced with the challenge of integrating their shadow or damage with who they are truly born to be. Other challenges to the natal chart with these planets can, I suspect, also result in narcissism when the energy is not resolved, but the quincunx is the most difficult to integrate.
One way to spot a narcissist is through the chart. Are they expressing the placement of their personal planets or something else? Someone who is expressing a personal planet in that placement’s negative energy is not a narcissist. They’re just an asshole.
To be a whole person you don’t have to like yourself or even be likable; you just have to BE yourself. Learning to like yourself just makes it all work better.
Do you have narcissists in your life? What aspects do you think are the culprit?
29 Responses to “Astrology And Narcissism”
– The reason Narcissism is so impossible to treat is that over time so much of a person’s energy has been spent in creating and upholding the false self that the real self has fallen so far behind in development that it is no longer a viable option.
That is the most terrifying description of Narcissism I’ve read to date.
thank you, yolanda_sky and Elsa! Rachel, I suspect that narcissism, like most things, occurs on a continuum. narcissistic up to full-blown intractable Narcissism. I’m not sure where on the scale it moves into the realm of the irresolvable. I think one reason narcissists are rarely helped is that even where the resolution is possible the actual treatment would cause more pain than the person is willing to take on.
narcissism= being me is too painful.
interacting with a narcissist is like interacting with the ventriloquist’s dummy… only to the extent of it being like a horror movie where it seems to move around and talk on its own.
ventriloquists’ dummies are creeeepy.
I think this has got to be one of the best explanations of Narcissism I’ve read yet. One of my former collegiate friends was a narcissist. As the years progressed it really became quite pronounced. To this day I don’t believe she has many friends. If I remember correctly, she was a Leo, rising Cancer. Another narcissist I know is a Leo, rising Libra.
I am speechless, Satori and I totally concur. Frog x
Wow, this is pretty true..
I don’t know if I was ever full on Nassasitic. However self hatered growing up was my tune.
When I first learned about Saggitarius as a Sun Sign, I didn’t think it sounded like who I wanted to become, I didn’t like Sagittarians.
When I learned about Astrology charts, I REALLY didn’t like my first house venus-pluto conjunction, or my planets in pisces. I really felt that my own chart was my down-fall, the energy keep me back from ever achieving my goals.
I only went to a therapist for like 4 months, and we never even borached the topic of Narassitic trends… All lot of it was because of my then ex-boyfriend still living with me, and my family.
However I cut off ties with my family after that, and I don’t stay with people who dont comprimise with me, or try to change core things aobut me that who I am…. I am very much in touch with all my Sagg, Pisces, and Scorpio energy, and have released the more I work towards my Sagg expresstion, the happier and stable I come.
I also love myself, which is a new experience.
In some ways, this could describe anyone with an anxiety disorder I have Chiron conjunct the sun, ceres and Mercury, and it widely opposes Uranus.
In Riding Between the Worlds, the author talks about the False Self vs the Real Self. I fluctuate between the two. Except the False Self is the scared me, and I liked my real self.
How interesting! Its good to know I’m probably just an asshole jk Wonderful topic!
Excellent post… you explained this so well.. thank you Satori.
In the book I mentioned, the False Self was what others had told someone they should be. (sorry for the extra comment – I wish we could edit.)
Excellent explanation! There are more narcissists out there than people think….until you get to know them really well, then the teeth come out and its a painful thing to be sucked into their world, and they are so charming that they can easily do it. And then the victims wonder why they feel so confused and bad about themselves…its because the narcissist very cleverly attempts to make his victims feel that way, so that he can feel better about himself. Its an awful thing to experience….and thankfully I was able to extricate myself from the clutches of one. I read every book I could get my hands on about the subject, and Satori summarized it all beautifully.
Excellent post! Our ex-business partner was a true Narcissist, unfortunately we didn’t find out until we were embroiled in an ugly buiness divorce. We sold our 1/2 of the company to him but it was so much more painful than it should’ve been. He fits the psychological profile to a T; abandoned by his father at 5, risk taking hobbies, etc. He is a classic case – his wife is another one of his victims who’ve confirmed this.
I’ve stayed away from his energy for so long but this is is very intriguing & I may have to look at his chart.
These are VERY SCARY individuals & I think before anyone goes into business w/ someone one a large scale they should do some psychological testing done for compability & more important “discovery.
Google Narcissitic Personality Disorder & you’ll be very afraid of these people & now this info adds to the evidence.
Barbara GOOD FOR YOU, I’m glad you got away from this horrible situation. You completely understand they “help” people then when the person is over a barrell they basically blackmail them into doing things for the narcissits benefit – I have tons of these stories. My heart rate just went up thinking about this situation.
Great Stuff Satori!
DAMNIT! It at my post! It was probably too long!! I hate this!
Our ex-business partner was one, he fit the personality profile to a T. Google Narcissistic Personality Disorder & it’s amazing what these people are capable of. Ugly, DANGEROUS people.
I don’t know what his chart looks like & I don’t give a shit – I stay away from that energy as much as possible!
Good stuff Satori & if he were still in our lives I would definately have you look at how we could extract him from our lives; however, our lawyers did this a few years ago. Expenseive, ugly & F***ing painful!
You have really nailed it! I’ve seen it happen and progress over time very closely. The false self gets stronger and stronger and the real self gets suffocated until in the end, it’s gone. The narcissist can’t access it any more. Many people get it wrong, they do think it’s about self-love. But with a narcissist, there is no real self. It’s very scary to witness it happen and it’s very hard to get out of the life of such a person. Gives me the chills just thinking about it.
Barbara, good for you & if anyone thinks they have a Narcissist in their lives – DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT & GET OUT!
Satori, I can’t tell you how great this post is and could easily save someone before there lives are put at risk on many levels.
Not a lot of compassion out there for the poor sods who get lumbered with this complex! And some confusion possibly with the sociopath archetype? Anyway, I struggle daily to accept and love my real self. The vulnerability involved is very testing. Luckily the day is only so long. X
p.s. Just checked – distressingly i have natal Pluto quincunx Sun and Venus quincunx Pluto
So Good Satori!
Thanks for your insight.
Your writing is awesome.
Kind of scary. I could see myself being a narcissist, except it takes such a huge amount of energy to build a false self and support it.
I agree with others that its an excellent explanation !! Thank you!
As the child of a narcissist, I salute you. Best explanation yet. Thank you Satori
Not only do they not love themselves, they lack any capacity to love anyone else in a real way. I think it’s very, very sad. How awful to live in such a superficial relationship to everything. Seems like meaningless-ness and a waste ~ I have struggled with this through my husband’s parents and, after 10 years have completely cut off any interaction. He is in complete denial so I salute any child of a narcissist, it takes real courage to admit what is truly going on and the lack of love is just agonizing.
Great post Satori!
Satori–
I am a child of a parent w/ destructive narcissistic personality disorder. I didn’t realize it until I was in late middle age; then read every book available on the topic. I agree with others that your post is a brilliant explanation. You obviously have some deep familiarity with this topic, too. I am struck by the lack of compassion for people with this tragic disorder–it is, after all, a mental illness. It is very sad for all involved.
This post resonates.
I hope to remember your post when next in the future I’m struggling with my own mental health issues. Thank you.
I missed this somehow the first time. Thank you, Satori, My mother is a narcissist. My psychologist has helped me see the truth. It’s been extraordinary difficult to get to this point. I look forward to reading more what you have to say on the subject <3
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Oh wow! This is such a great explanation of Narcissism. I have one in my life and it is so difficult to explain, you’ve summed it up beautifully, thank you. I don’t know the chart placements of this person, so I can’t help there.