Mars And The Shadow: Making A Case For Anger
Astrology in real life
Cap writes on Does Everyone Have A Dark Side?
I definitely have anger. I wouldn’t call it “anger issues” – although, its been a little bit lately due to hormones and sleep deprivation, but I am aware of it. I used to date men who were angry and point fingers at them, until Elsa P came along and said HELLO! 
So I wonder how do you “integrate” an angry shadow?
First I’d try to rewire my thinking. Anger is not a “shadow” emotion anymore than happiness is. I realize this is not a common belief but anger (Mars), like happiness is something that occurs in nature. It is energy and like all energy; it’s neutral until directed.
It is anger that gets people going. If they are mad at their circumstances they may be driven to change them but if you squish and repress and deny all rage, at best you’ve got something inert and I don’t think human beings were designed for that.
A person may become torpid in rare cases but more commonly the energy perverts. Rather than channel anger into initiative the supposedly “non-angry” attack others. You can see a number of examples of this in the comments on the original post.
In your case, Cap (I know her), you can yell at your man until you’re blue and get nothing done which will give your more reason to yell I suppose. OR you could take all your anger and direct in a way that is productive, helpful, healing, etc. and I’ll give you a strange example.
I am the first (Mars) astrology blogger on this planet. When I first started writing I was attacked by people who think astrologers should be persecuted, or storytellers or whatever it is I am that pisses people off so badly.
I was not happy about being attacked. I was mad and so I kept writing and now 10 years have passed. Their anger fed my anger and now we have an ElsaElsa blog, an Astro Dispatch and I am on the verge of creating jobs for other astrologers. Understanding this, do you still think anger is a shadow emotion or is it just an emotion?
Everyone has anger. It is not something to try to irradiate from the planet. What should we do? Castrate boys the minute they are born? Think that will do it? Cutting off balls seems pretty “angry” to me.
Mars will always be there. What is key is that a person’s Mars energy is allowed OVERT expression. When I was a kid and still living in town, the whole street worth of kids, age 5-15 would line up. Henry would blow a whistle and we’d race each other down the street. We would also run individually and he’d time up with a stop watch. Competition, see? Physical exertion.
Now many (most) kids sit on couches, eat doughnuts and shoot and splatter open skulls on video games. Not that they are angry or anything. Their mothers who can’t get those kids to so much as clean their room are not angry either, I’m sure.
There is an old adage, “If you want something done, do it yourself”. You are the hero in your life. So if you don’t like my astrology blog, why bother me? Why bitch me out when you have endless opportunity to write your own astrology blog?
Translated for, Cap, if you don’t like your man, then take the initiative to leave him. If you do like your man then find another outlet for your rage because directing it at him is going to do nothing but make you madder and next thing you know you’ll be saying, “I spent 10 years with that motherfucker.”
If that happens, whose fault will it be? Mine? Obama’s? The fault of the economy or the oil spill or the fact your mother dressed you in lace?
That’s fine for some but to me, Mars energy (including rage and anger) is as precious as any other energy we have out there. If you choose to direct yours at trying to get someone else to act as the hero in your life, I doubt you are going to like the results.
Do you have an outlet for your anger?
34 Responses to “Mars And The Shadow: Making A Case For Anger”
Exercise, a good cardio workout and weight training, are great ways to channel Mars/aggression.
Games of strategy like chess.
On a larger scale, there are MANY injustices in this world that deserve our anger. I’ve met activists who are wonderful ppl, and let their passion and anger against social inequity drive their work.
Mercury gemini square mars virgo
Thats a homerun, goes goes is gone!!
Love this post! I like this perspective and am inspired already and seeing ways already that I can constructively use my Mars energy.
@isthmus- You’re comment too, about using passion and anger together is inspiring- an excellent example.
GOD BLESS YOU ELSA. THIS POST MAKES ME SOOOOOOO HAPPY!
*APPLAUSE*
quite a refreshing read, you wrote there elsa, especially concerning anger
as a scorp, I have always had some anger:)
Agreed, fantastic post.
I run because if I didn’t I’d probably be throwing rocks or dinner plates or something. I would prefer to be swimming or surfing, but hopefully in my future life, something like that will become my outlet.
For me, sadness completely overrode my anger issues. Losing a series of family members in a row 12 years ago kicked a lot of anger out of me. I was holding onto it and it wasn’t good for me…
Finally. An advocate for OVERT expression of anger for everyone, including,,,,,(drum roll),,,, Women. Bout fuckin’ time.
There was a recent issue at work. An attorney (“Atty #1″) I work with promised a project to a client & expert witness to come from me. It is a collaborative work project but I was setting it all up. I came in Friday morning and it was there with his email to these fellows indicating I would send it that morning. Problem was, I had just gotten it back from him and the project would take time – impossible to get out that AM without half-a**ing it, which I wouldn’t do to a client. To top it off, he left a full day’s work in addition and wanted me to call him when an item was finished so he could come in to review (before his 2:30 appt with the eye doc-dilation). At first I ignored ignored the work. Came in an extra day to help out with some backlog for the boss (Atty #2), so did his work until we could talk. When I told him the situation, he told me to do the other attorney’s work since that is “helping out too,” albeit indirectly.
Worked diligently all afternoon and received email from Atty #1 around 4:45 asking if he came in Monday would he have his item to review. I responded that he should have checked with me on the 1st project because what he promised was not possible, but I was working on it and would send by end of day. As for the other thing, it would have to wait until Tuesday when I would be in. He responded with, oh sorry, thought such-and-such was done already, ya-da ya-da, to which I responded that, no, you told me not to do ya-da, ya-da until you review; besides, that was the least time-consuming task involved.
After 6:00 pm, Atty #2 returned to the office and saw me still plugging away. He asked if it had to go out that day and I told him it had been promised to the client for that morning. He said no, go home – don’t stay for this, I’ll talk to Atty #1. (He and Atty #2 had received response from client to Atty #2′s email stating that he wouldn’t have time to review for at least a couple days; nice, huh?)
Over the weekend Atty #1 emails again with an apology: “It was inconsiderate but I didn’t mean it. On Thursday I had an idea to send out on Friday but you weren’t there. I should have waited.” Of course, he calls me at home for everything else!
Got into the office yesterday fully prepared to reemphasize the “check-with-me-first” issue but also about how he’s all over the map with things, I didn’t need the distraction of having to call him in to review something that he would have an opportunity to review the following week, etc. I was prepared…but not for a bouquet of flowers on my desk from Atty #1….puke.
Did I melt inside and say, “Awwww, that’s so sweet”; no, I was pissed! This attorney had been talked to before by Atty #2 about his behavior and I saw that bouquet as a shield, a way to shut me down, because he feels his job is in jeapordy (he’s messed up some cases and I’m not the only one to have complained about him). But now if I were to say, “hey, wait a minute, not so fast…” after FLOWERS, I kind of thought that could look bad.
But the flowers were inappropriate and sexist! This wasn’t a lover’s quarrel. This attorney told me to let him know when and if he steps on my toes and I did. All that was necessary was an assurance that he would not do this in the future. I am a professional and feel insulted that flowers were offered, I presume, to soothe my “girlish” feelings. I feel it’s condescending and demeaning. Secretary’s Day would have been fine – but because I had to put him in line? Not fine!
I was direct when he offended me another time and he all whiney and apologetic and and said, “Oh, please don’t get mad at me, I hate it, like when my wife gets made at me!” Another time discussing a legal procedure where I triple-verified it, he wasn’t getting the answer he wanted, and I finally told him I’m sorry I can’t come up with a different answer for you but you’re welcome to call the court, check court rules, etc., like I did, he said, “I don’t want to ‘get into it’ with you.”
Now I’m really convinced this man is a misogynist and the flowers the tactic of a ruthless trial lawyer. But on the other hand, with current planetary alignments, how do I know I’m not just taking all this the wrong way?
What’s interesting, he has Neptune retrograde in Libra opposing Venus and Mercury in Aries (almost at the exact midpoint). His Mercury is conjunct my 1H Moon/Saturn conjunction, so maybe my BS detector is working just fine.
So here I’m not denying I’m angry but before I decide what to do with it, since clearly some changes would need to be made, I am still thinking about whether the suspician fueling this anger is legit. In the meantime, fantasies of revenge work for me (Mars conj. Neptune in 8th H. Scorpio). As a reciprocal “acceptance” of his apology, I could hire him a stripper since don’t all men think about sex, like women love flowers? Fortunately I rarely act on these things.
Another thing, after thinking about Le Ciel’s comment: once I gave myself permission to be angry, I actually felt less angry overall. It’s amazing how free it can be, just giving yourself permission to feel whatever the fuck you like!
Amen, marjita.
Love the post…the older I get, the better I am at directing that anger into creative energy..You said it Elsa!!!!
(I have a LOT of experience with anger too…*wink*)
Yesterday I was angry, wounded, and bleeding profusely.
Today I am Getting Shit Done.
I have learned from some of the best 
Hi Elsa,
Thanks – this post is so timely for me. My progressed Mars is in my 12th house Leo and rage doesn’t begin to describe it – simmering away underneath all of the time at most anything and everything these days it seems.
I was so angry at my ex-husband’s treatment of me almost 12 years ago (when I walked out) and I channelled it all into building my home, so used it as a propeller. It was good and got me what I needed.
My father passed away three years ago and now my anger (rage) is masked in grief – still. Does anyone have any idea how to get it moving again.
Thanks,
DeeC
@Teri, Please, on behalf of all attorneys, let me apologize. It’s a tough business and most trial attorneys aren’t ruthless, they’re disorganized and overwhelmed. And, clearly, in the instance of attorney #1, clueless.
Most of us genuinely appreciate any and all help from any source. But, we need training. A lot of training.
At least enjoy the flowers even if they are completely inappropriate. You deserve them especially since that lawyer seems incapable of giving you what you really should be getting, professional treatment.
Teri, your Saturn’s on the guy’s mercury — seems you have the power to control/repress him; he’s right to feel afraid of you. Use your power over him wisely! My guess is that he’s feeling totally inadequate. (Hope I’m not out of line here.)
Just saw marijita’s post – what she says sounds right. Please ignore my post above, Teri!
As for anger, Elsa, this blog post was great. I don’t have good outlets for anger, and don’t have a good understanding of the energy. I’ve been acting pretty ruthless these days, but not for my own good. Hard to be the hero of my own story. But one thing I’m really getting very good at: accepting anger in others! I proud that my ability to see others’ anger as completely natural has grown so much.
I think this is a great post. I read somewhere that the more an aries woman evolves the more she learns to use her anger to fuel her passion for equality, fairness and championing a just cause.
I definitely have had a lot of anger issues, and am learning that repressing it is not at all good for me and in the long run for anyone else either. But it doesn’t mean its acceptable for me to be hurtful or to blow up like entertainment fireworks. Because thats what it ends up becoming then- entertainment
I still don’t always get it right, but it helps for me to know what’s triggering my anger so I know how to channel it… That is if I can stop long enough to clear my head of all the energy and emotion and confusion.. 
My Mars is in Taurus
I definitely don’t like to be pushed around, prodded or asked to talk about anything or decide anything before I’m ready
I also have noticed that I muck things up if I’m hurried, especially emotionally hurried…
This post came right on time for me. Aries and Mars is omnipresent in my chart. Moon, mars and North Node in Aries in my first house. Today I was so angry and frustrated because it seems as though now matter how hard I try there’s red tape everywhere. I’m trying to save up money so that I can move back to NY and the only way to do that is with a job. I go on the interviews and then they tell me they’ll call me in a few days or later in the week or later that night..Having Aries all over my chart makes me want things as soon as I think about them.. Hard work and patience are not my forte’. I don’t believe in the saying, “If it’s easy, run from it.” I don’t think there’s anything wrong with instant OR easy. I’m trying to channel my anger in a constructive way..I haven’t been able to find one besides treating myself to pizza and a canoli and daydreaming about how wonderful I just know the future will be for me..sigh..
awesome post. i didnt know you were the first astrology blogger ever, very cool!
i’m always looking out for those outlets now and life is so much better because of this.
exercise and writing are my go to activities for now
@Teri – Just think, it could be worse. You could be that moron’s wife. I will bet you anything that any time he screws up, he responds by getting her some stupid little present instead of doing anything meaningful. Like NOT doing that thing again. I bet he whines and pouts if she doesn’t immediately forgive him, too. UGH.
Marijita,
I thank you and appreciate your very thoughtful, considerate comments.
I should apologize for characterizing the behavior as that of a “ruthless trial attorney” since the truth is that these things are more often an issue in personal interrelationship than in courtrooms. With natal Mercury in Leo I did overdramatize while expressing what simply felt like upsetting, manipulative behavior.
I actually enjoy working with trial attorneys and from my viewpoint, the vocation seems ideally suited to positively channeling Mars energy: fighting on behalf of client(s) against opposing interests to reach a successful resolution. And most trial attorneys I’ve worked with are generally well-rounded people without all the social issues this one seems to have.
I am disappointed that I can’t seem to reach an understanding with this attorney, since I really love my job and everyone else in the office. I did notice that Mars and Pluto in this guy’s chart are extremely out-of-bounds, so that’s probably why many in the office feel like an alien moved in. Unfortunately, I’m the only one with litigation experience, so I’m the one who takes the brunt of it. I thought he would amalmagate himself to the culture of the office in time but, as the flower incident may show, subtle and not-so-subtle signals on my part (training) often turn out tiresome and discouraging. This man is going on 65 y/o, so really it’s a matter of my deciding what I can tolerate, laugh off or otherwise.
You seem to have a humble, fair-minded approach and I am certain that any assistant you work with is as appreciative of you as you are of him or her.
Teri
PS: I’m afraid to enjoy the flowers too much, since he may want them back for his wife. During the holidays he gave me a beautiful candy apple a court reporter dropped off and another secretary was salivating over it. Her father was in a nursing home dying and I gave it to her to cheer her up. A couple days later he asked how I enjoyed the apple and I told him I gave it to Deb and he got all upset and said his wife wanted the apple and if he had known, he would have given it to her!
Marijita,
Thank you for your thoughtful, considerate comments. I should apologize for characterizing the behavior as “ruthless trial attorney” behavior, because these things are more apt to play out in personal interrelationship than in the courtroom. With Mercury in Leo I did overdramatize what is better described as upsetting, manipulative behavior.
Based on your humble, realistic, and fair-minded approach, you must have an assistant that appreciates you just as much as you appreciate him or her! I actually really enjoy trial attorneys; the vocation seems like a great way to express Mars energy, like Elsa says. Most trial lawyers I’ve worked with can do a full day of advocating for clients against opposing interests toward best resolution and are well-rounded people with no social issues like this one.
Interestingly, Atty #1 has Mars & Pluto extremely out-of-bounds, so that may explain why many in the office feel invaded by an alien. Unfortunately for me, I’m the only one experienced in the litigation side and so I take the brunt of it.
About the training, I figured it would take this guy some time to become amalgamated to the office culture, but subtle or even not-so-subtle signals often lead to discouragement, like in today’s post.
seekingzen,
Believe me, I do thank God for things like that!
Maybe he got pissy with her one too many times and she suggested the flowers for his secretary!
Score!
Marijita,
Sorry about the second post; long delay after posting the first one, thought I lost it. The second one’s shorter, so I’d go with that one!
Nicely said, Marijita!
my post disappeared?
Love this post. After all, the quote isn’t “I’m complacent as hell, and I’m not gonna take it anymore!”
lol, Del I actually like that quote a lot!
Am loving all of the recent and not so recent Mars blog entries here.
I’m in the middle of a Pluto multi-transit including a square to my Mars, well Mars is one of the planets in the T crunch. My outlets aint quite up to par and up for a total rehaul, its complicated. I went to a shrink when smoldering rage first started bubbling up and totally ah, what’s the word Elsa uses, repulsed the shrink. I got pretty riled up when this therapist stated that my mother was likely a schizophrenic or had severe mental illness and therefore there’s no way I’ve ever been a sane person. sigh. Providence gifted me with a session elsewhere which was super effective even though it was only 2 hours. To be continued… I’m saving up for an Elsa session.
Meanwhile I’ve taken up metalsmithing. Feels really good.
Aries Mars.
looks like work is tending that way.
as an outlet. a way to do something about things, fer goodness’ sake……
started out with a bang. literally. a bunch of people died down the street 
which also feeds the anger.
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Yes I do, phew! COuld always use more, though. I had a funny conversation with my sister the other day, she said “I could get a gun and shoot people in the face because they piss me off, or I could go to the gym and be an animal there.”
Ha ha ha! Both anger and a keen desire to be physical are family traits–as soon as a family member is angry, the first thing another will say is, “Well you’re obviously not getting enough exercise, get out there and burn some energy off before you blow.”
(My family is crazy but they know a thing or two about energy going to waste. My Mars is in my 4th House).