I wrote this in 2004. It’s my sister and I on the phone, close to 20 years ago. We’re talking about a man I was dating and my yet-to-be-born daughter who my sister had seen psychically.

The man has his Sun, Mercury, Venus, Saturn and the Black Moon Lilith in Scorpio, some of that square Pluto rising in Leo.  More astrology sprinkled throughout.

The man is an actor and a singer and a very talented one at that. “XXXXX” is my sister’s husband at the time. I never liked him so I blotted out his name in all my stories.  He was also a Scorpio.

Swearing below the break

“…Thankfully I don’t think we’ll ever have to witness that. Stupid as some of these bitches are, I don’t think there is a bitch out there stupid enough to go for your man. And as far as he goes? Well he gets to be on a pedestal and you know he loves that. He gets to perform but he is one step removed from the masses and believe me he needs the protection. Psychically I mean. I don’t think he could go out there and sing like he does if you weren’t there. So see? It is not just how you look that would help his career, though that is a big part of it. You enhance his image, greatly. But you know I have told XXXXX this for a long time. The best thing that could happen to an artist is to get you working for them.”

“What do you mean?”

“What do I mean she asks. Did you ever look at who is in your family? They are all artists. Hello? There is nothing about artists that you don’t understand. Not a fucking thing. The mysterious artist is no mystery to your ass. Not at all. You grew up just one of you and a house full of artists and you single-handedly kept us alive. You kept us fed and somewhat together. Fuck it. And you were 10 years old so that’s what I mean.’

“Okay.”

“Yeah. So he is doing good with you around. Better than he has in a long time. Maybe better than he ever has. He touches you when he needs to ground. Which is always by the way. He does, doesn’t he?”

“Uh, yeah. Yeah he does.”

“Fuckin’ A, I can see him. And that’s all it takes. I bet that he can’t believe it. I bet he has never been so grounded in his life.”

I heard her inhale and knew she was visualizing.

“He comes in and puts his hands on your shoulders.”

“Right.”

“Yeah I can see him. I see him now. Everything he feels leaves his body and goes right through yours. And that’s a huge amount of energy too. Because, shit. What’s that feel like anyway?” she asked.

“Good. It feels good. Uh. I like it, it runs through me like current.”

“Okay. So where does it go?”

“To the ground.”

“Like a lightening rod?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay, well I could never stand that. I could not stand that even once so I’ve got news for this Scorpio motherfucker. He better get you pregnant as fast as he can. He better mark his spot because he isn’t going to meet you twice.”

I snorted.

“And he may not realize this yet because his ego is so huge. He may think that he found you once so he can find you again. But if he’s thinking that and he screws around with all this fucking Scorp, well he is going to be in for a rude awakening. Because he won’t find you again and he’ll wind up like the rest of these motherfuckers.”

“How’s that?” I asked.

“What do you mean, how’s that? Do you ever look behind you, Elsa? Well do you?”

I had no answer.

“Because you know how to leave. You are the leaving-est motherfucker I have ever met and when you’re gone, you are fucking gone.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. And these motherfuckers are left looking around saying, where’d she go? And I guess she wasn’t gonna put up with my shit after all.” She snorted.  “She told me she’d leave but I am so fucking cool I didn’t think she ever would. Yeah. His ego is big enough to think something like that but you don’t care. That’s one of the reasons you like him, right? His ego?”

“Yes. Yes, it is.”

“Figures. Venus in Leo loves an ego. Okay, Elsa, well this sounds pretty good. Just find out his secret as soon as you can.”

“Any ideas about that?”

“No. Not really. He is holding that card close. He may even know I’m looking. It might be sex though. Aquarius Mars has to have done some experimenting.”

“Mars is not opposite his Leo. It’s out of orb. Mars is opposite Jupiter Uranus conjunct in Cancer.”

“Oh really? Well I didn’t think of that. Just when I thought it was worst case scenario, it degrades. Then that goes double or triple on the experimentation, huh?”

I nodded and she smoked,  I could hear her inhale.

“Well let’s not speculate. I know you, you’ll find out soon enough. Or maybe you’re already pregnant. Jupiter Uranus opposite Mars? Well that’d be a big Jupiter Uranian surprise from his Aquarius Mars, eh?”

I laughed. “Good. That’s good. If I am…”

She interrupted. “If you are then he’ll be happy. Don’t worry about that. He wants the baby Elsa. He sees what I see and anyone who can see this girl that you are going to have would want her.”

“Why?”

“Because of who she is. You’ll see. But he has a secret and it may be bad.”

“Bad?”

“Yeah. Bad enough. It’s bad enough that he thinks you may leave him because of it.”

“Will I?”

“Who knows? I don’t know. Depends on what it is. It may be something that doesn’t bother you. Fuck it. How many secrets do we have and how bad are they? Let’s face it. Our secrets are hard to top. How many people have the kind of secrets we have?”

I laughed.

“And you laugh about it,” she said.  “See he may have a secret that he thinks will really piss you off when what you’d really do is laugh your ass off about it.” She inhaled from her cig. “He may tell you his secret and you may look right at him and say, you call that a fucking secret?”

We laughed.

“Or maybe not. You may throw him out on his ass. In whatever case he’s going to have to spill it or you are going to have to dig it out of him and then we’ll see. Unless you are pregnant I mean. If you’re pregnant then it’s a done deal. See Elsa, all that matters is that you have this baby. And if he hasn’t figured this out, I think that pretty soon he will,because this girl is something else. She’s going to be visiting him in the middle of the night. She has probably already done it.”

I laughed. “What is she going to say?”

“I don’t know. Shit or get off the pot I guess.”

We both laughed.

“Or get off my mother if you don’t mean business.  Because I want to be born, fucker,” she added.

On my end of the phone, there was a snort because while my sister is wholly entertaining and amusing and I take her with more than a grain of salt I never hand her the whole damned shaker.

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