We were sitting in the doctor’s office waiting for results of a test the soldier had, he was outlining the various ways he might die.

‘Why do you tell me this stuff? You’re going to die and what am I going to do? It’s not like you’ll do anything they say. You’re not going to have procedures.”

“No, I don’t want any procedures.”

“Well I know that. So you ignore everything they tell you, then you die and what am I supposed to do?”
(swearing below the break)

“When I die, you can just get yourself one of those vegan motherfuckers – going to live forever.”

“And then you look down from the afterlife and see that and what do you think, hmm?”

“That vegan bastard is driving, P, crazy. You’ll be, praying for the end of time,” he said, bursting into song: “Praying for the end of time! Hurry up and arrive! If I have spend another moment with you, I don’t think that I am gonna survive!”

I snorted and he wrapped up, “Come on end of time, so I can end my time with you!!!!!!”

The doctor walked in and we were standing there… well he was sitting, I was standing and both looked over at him, grinning like Cheshire cats.