Astrology And Pandering: “My Opinion Is Not For Sale”
Astrology in real life
pan·der (pndr)
intr.v. pan·dered, pan·der·ing, pan·ders
1. To act as a go-between or liaison in sexual intrigues; function as a procurer.
2. To cater to the lower tastes and desires of others or exploit their weaknesses:
I have worked with thousands of clients over the years. Last week I was forced to end a consultation right in the middle of it, offering the client a refund which is something I have never done before in my career. I have refunded a person’s money because they weren’t satisfied with my work once or twice but never, even encountered anything like this before. I just couldn’t get through the consult because the client and I were at cross purposes.
I ended the consultation because I realize the client wanted me to pander. Essentially, I was being paid to agree with and validate her self view AND her opinion of me which was quite low! She’d decided I was a lousy astrologer and basically was now paying me to agree with her.
Now I could have done it. There are all kinds of astrologers who pander, that’s for sure. I could have manipulated and placated her, took the beating she wished to give me (along with her money). I could have set her up to pay me and beat me on a regular basis but it’s just not in my character and so this meltdown occured. But it got me thinking.
Although I have a number of clients I have worked with for years, I do not see what I do as “therapy”. If I was working as a therapist, I think other action would have been appropriate but as it is, forming a therapeutic relationships and allowing people their projections and various other sundries falls outside the paradigm of what I do.
I think it’s important to note this as a boundary or as a limitation or however it may be viewed even though I have only had this problem once and may never have it again. I am definitely not going to pander to clients and I don’t care if I could get rich doing so.
I believe in carving out a niche. My reputation is for candor and keen insight so if you are calling looking for lies and lack of insight, I am definitely not going to be your gal. But I can’t say that another astrologer might not be able to help this gal, or that they might just agree with her read on things. But for me this is a point of integrity. My opinion is not for sale and if I behaved otherwise I am pretty sure I’d put myself right out of business.

9 Responses to “Astrology And Pandering: “My Opinion Is Not For Sale””
I got mixed up in something like that last week too…The person was at complete cross-purposes to me even though I was going out of my way to try and help them. They completely misread everything I said and then turned around and visciously attacked my character.
Astrology has REALLY helped me learn about why people react to me this way and it has helped ease the grief and give me some perspective after sucker punches like this.
Sounds like it was a rather odd encounter. After all, that is the best thing about being self-employed, isn’t it, that you make your own decisions. And if you gave her what she wanted, than it would not have been the truth you saw, and in essence would have invalidated what you do. And quite frankly I don’t think a good therapist is one who just agrees with everything you say either – the best thing for anyone most times is an objective perspective.
I agree with Dorothy – I hope a therapist wouldn’t pander either.
You’re a consultant! And being self-employed, you set your own standards. Way to go!
And that is what will endear yourself to people with integrity – because that’s what you have –
It’s great that this client brought that to your attention – I think it’s an admirable quality so – Good on you!!!!
Good for you, Elsa!
i ran into that issue when i did card readings over the phone (in person i had much better luck.) so many people want you to tell them what they want to hear, rather than what you actually perceive.
Wonderful article, Elsa! You described it so well that I feel a bit sick to my stomach. It’s so good that you raise the issue, because, unfortunately, there are clients who expect it and astrologers/card readers/psychics who make their living doing just that. We are NOT them!
I’m glad you “reprised” it because otherwise I wouldn’t have seen it. Donna Cunningham
always be true to yourself…no matter how hard it is sometimes…integrety is a very rare commodity these days…but the peace of mind it brings you has no price…
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Good for you, Elsa! You set an excellent example for the rest of us working astrologers. Hey, we got standards to maintain.