Ask the collective
I promised a story about one of the people who set out to cause me anguish and this is it. Again, I consider this a Pluto in Capricorn deal… making the shadow (Pluto) public (Capricorn) which you may say is my specialty.
In whatever case, I started blogging on Xanga.com in 2001 and I had an audience almost immediately. I had fans but I had one hell of a lot of detractors as well. I am not sure the reason, I suspect there was more than one but I was routinely attacked in every way you can imagine.
One of the things people did – they created blogs solely to write posts about how I sucked and all I can say is I was DEVASTATED. I was terribly hurt and I mean I was cut to the bone. I would be sobbing over what was written about me as it was truly cruel and worse, I profoundly confused. I just couldn’t understand how people could be so mean and for why?
I had started writing (about astrology) on an (Ebay) message board by accident. I wrote there for about 3 months (600 pages!!) and then started a blog – the first astrology blog on the planet, I think and boy did they hate me, at least some of them did. And they (whoever “they” were) put up all these blogs, ‘I hate Elsa P and here is why” except I didn’t use my name back then. And it was relentless.
I wanted to quit writing, this seemed simple enough. But that was just not in the cards so slowly (and I mean VERY slowly) I grew a thicker skin. Matter of fact, in hindsight I don’t think this could have been a slower process. I was just freakishly hurt at how cruel people are and for no reason at all. But I did keep at it and in 2005 I moved to this blog.
In 2006 I got an email. The email essentially said this:
“Hi, my name is blah blah and my wife (now my ex) hates you. She hates you, she hates you with a passion, she really hates you and she hates the ground you walk on.
She hates you passionately and I just want to tell you that she was the one who did a lot of those things to you… I know this because I helped her. Yeah, I helped her do all those things and now I wonder if I should not have done all that to you so I’m sorry.”
Well now. What do you do with a mail like that?
I posted him back, I was very gracious.
I wondered about a man who would hurt a woman. I wondered about a man who would allow his wife to direct and dictate his actions. I wondered if the contact was more about betraying her than apologizing to me but I decided I really had no idea and I best take him at his word and respond kindly. What could I gain from doing otherwise and besides that, I don’t hold grudges. I literally have no place to put them so I wrote him back a nice note, thanking him for emailing and telling him not to worry about it.
I went further and wrote about the incident publicly. I went on my (old) blog and wrote… “You know all those people who harass me? Well one of them just apologized, how about that?”
I thought it might give someone else the idea or impetus to apologize or try to right something they had done. Not to me personally but to anyone.
I actually got nothing out of the apology but I had paid in spades. These people cut me to the bone, In guess when you are up to something like this, you’ve got the person completely dehumanized and I thought perhaps this would be a way some good could come of it? So I did that and then guess what he did?
The guy wrote me back 2 days later and guess what he wanted? Guess!!!
He asked me if I would read the charts of him and his new girlfriend… for free!
“Say, Elsa! Now that we’ve got this all cleared up, do you think you could help me out?”
What do you think of this (from a karma standpoint, mine or his)? Pick an angle, any angle…
31 Responses to “The Story Of A Man Who Set Out To Cause Me Anguish (Karma and Comeuppance Redux)”
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