The Soldier Deals With P’s Doomsday Scenarios

machine-gun.jpgThe soldier and I have that Mercury opposition with Mars involved on both sides and we challenge each other almost mindlessly. We both think very little of the direction this (the US) is continuing to move in and we like to talk about what we might do in various circumstances. You know. Like if I get famous and nosy people show up, he is going to shoot them.

“So what if this?” I asked.

“Then that.”

“And then what if thiiis?”

“Then we’ll do that.”

“Well what if this and this and this and that?”

“Well then we’ll get the machine gun out,” he said.

“But we don’t have a machine gun,” I said.

“P,’ he said as if he were talking to a child. “If we need a machine gun, we’ll have a machine gun.”

“How do you figure that? Like where are you going to go get a machine gun?”

“I’m not going to get a machine gun. If we need one, I’ll just built one,” he said.

“You’re going to build a machine gun?”

“Sure! They’re not complicated. There is nothing to ‘em. P, don’t you worry. If we need us a machine gun, I will make us one and it’ll only take me… it’d be a weekend’s work, that’s all.”

I stared.

“P, I will make the gun. How many times so I have to tell you? You’ve got nothing to worry about and I mean, not a thing.

(How’s that for a Mars, Mercury, Saturn T-square)


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