I was talking to the soldier a couple days ago…

“I had to get some light bulbs,” I said. “The bulbs in the kitchen burnt out and I didn’t have anymore that were bright enough so I am going to change them and then I may even try to change the porch light.”

“It’s out too?”

“It’s been out for two years. Yep. More than that actually. It’s been out for about two and a half I guess. When it first burned out I climbed up there to change the bulb but could not figure out how to get in there and do it. Must be simple, right? You’d think.”

“Yeah…”

“Well on top of that I was the one who put that porch light up. I did because the people who rented this house had smashed the old one so I replaced it with this one but then I could not remember how to get in the case and change the bulb. Its glass enclosed, see? But anyway I was out there and up on a ladder trying to change it about 2 years ago or so but I couldn’t figure it out. I was just too stressed I guess and I had so many other things to do I gave up in the moment and meant to go back and do that for all this time but have never had the chance.”

No answer.

“Yeah, I am not exactly procrastinating. I just simply do not and have not had time to climb up there and mess with it so I am thinking it’s about time I got the lights on around here. I suppose we have been in mourning here, you know?”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah, well we have been mourning. If we weren’t in mourning that light would be on and I am trying to come out of it so this is one of the things I have to do. It is one of the endless list of tasks I have to try to recover and when you walk up and see that light come on… its motion sensitive, then I guess you’ll know things have improved. It is so sad. It has been so bad around here I have not been able to change a light bulb for 2 years, I am sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry, P.”

“Yeah, I know. It just goes to show you that’s all. I It’s just evidence and the evidence is staggering in all directions isn’t it? I am going to figure this out in about 10 years.”