A couple days ago my friend, satori who is a Pisces told me that she connected me to the mundane world. “I connect you to the mundane and everyone else who is mundane, I connect to the other,” she said, and I laughed. I think it’s pretty funny when you have to get a Pisces to ground you; however she is not the first.

My sister is the first Pisces who attempted to connect me with the mundane. I say attempted because I am pretty sure she would tell you she failed and I was thinking about this today. I recalled something I wrote awhile back and meant to pull it up and post it but this came out instead…

My sister loves high level shopping (think Posh Spice) but she is stuck with a sister who could care less. Back when, it was big talk in her circles. No one could believe she had a sister who oblivious to clothing and makeup.

At one point, when I was about 30 she grilled me wanting to know if I was a lesbian. Apparently this was a theory amongst her and her friends. It was the best explanation they could come up I guess. I am not a clotheshorse, therefore I am a lesbian!

Continue reading Are You A Lesbian? We Want To Know Because We’re Looking For One Around Here…

I have not made a new year’s resolution in at least 20 years, maybe longer. I always figure I am doing my best all the time, so to hell with it. But last night I made three resolutions for the new year so apparently I think I need some fixing and here’s the worst of it: I started early.

Being the ultimate teacher’s pet, I started reforming myself the minute I had my list drawn up and I don’t know. I feel like the engine of some old car that has been sitting 20 years, that all the sudden turns over and springs to life. Could I be turning into a Stephen King movie? I think so.

Anyone else feel they need a tune up?

This, just in from an anonymous reader:

Scorpios For Hillary

Thanks for the tip!

The soldier found out yesterday, his son made it home (from Iraq) for Christmas. He has a wife  he loves.

They are young and I burst into tears at the news. How happy she must be to have him home for this time.

Overwhelmed because I was overwhelmed, the soldier got off the phone but he told me his wish for his son.

“I hope he gets to sit in a bathtub… I hope he gets to take baths with her for 30 years. That’s what I want for my son.”

With Jupiter in Capricorn there is a chance to make your vision of the future real. What do you wish for?

Saturn is in Virgo and speaking of editing, my book and limiting what you say, a few years ago HQ was helping me put it together. The book is about my life and he came up with the structure for it which I could have never managed on my own courtesy my Saturn Neptune inclinations. Structure to me is just what you read on this blog. It’s all connected – isn’t it obvious? Ha ha ha.

Continue reading Saturn In Virgo… And La La La, Different Perspectives

“First Blood?” I asked “I saw that movie when it came out… well, it was pretty new. I saw it on a video, 25 years ago. 20 years ago? Whatever, I liked the movie and I thought of you.”

“You thought of me?”

“Of course. I thought, this is how he’d be if he hadn’t died. If he got out of Special Forces, he’d be like this, I guess.”

“You never thought I was alive?”

Continue reading Life, Death, Love And Today’s Venus Square Neptune

Dina writes:

“I definitely noticed your keeping your life secret from the blog, Elsa. You keep saying that difficult things are going on in your life but never really talk about them. Plus you keep your music tastes secret. I remember the reason you gave for that. It’s because it’s precious to you right?

I know it’s kind of trivial and unfeeling to say it but.. I’m curious about what you’re keeping secret! :I’m especially curious about your past and your book.”

Dina – our perceptions are so different. I talk about my life non-stop on this blog. I keep some things secret (or private) for a variety of reasons which generally speaking, I reveal.

Continue reading Astrology And Secrets – It’s Neptune Again, Various Other Sundries: Elsa P Attempts To Explain

Dear Aquarian,

No, I don’t think there is any hope of changing the dynamic of this relationship and it suits you perfectly as is, whether you realize this or not.

As an Aquarian with Venus in Aquarius you want a lot of space and with this man, you get it. You also have your Moon and Mars in Aries so you like the challenge he provides. He must be perennially hunted, see? But most of all it’s the pining.

You have Venus square Neptune and there is a part of you that is addicted to pining for this un-gettable man but check this:

If you get him… if you actually get this guy and nail him down I guarantee you the situation will flip on you. Instead of where you are now, you will be pining for freedom and challenge. Pretty trippy, huh?

I admit that living in this hall of mirrors with various drives conflicting is a job.  However it is your job and at least you’re not bored or boring.

Good luck.

Need advice? Ask here!
Subscribe to the Elsa Blog
Info on scheduling a personal consultation

“You watched movies?” I asked the soldier this morning on the phone.

“Yeah, I saw 3 of them. Fell asleep for the last of them.”

“What movies?”

“Christmas-y ones.” He named two movies. I can’t remember which but both rated G. “And then I started watching Mary Poppins but I fell asleep for that one.”

“I watched movies too,” I said. “Not Christmas type – movies from my secret life instead.”

“Secret life?”

Continue reading Astrology, Movies And My Secret Life

Mars (anger) Mercury (communication) and Saturn (control/restriction) in a synastric grand cross…

“Okay then, P. I’m going to drive and if you feel like you love me, then call me but if you feel mad in your veins, then don’t call me.”

“Are those the rules? Are those the perimeters?”

“Yes.”

“Duly noted. Don’t call you pissed.”

“No, you can call me pissed. You can call and yell at me. You know I don’t mind if you yell. I just have to remember not to laugh when you do or else you really get pissed off.”

“Yeah, jackass,” I said. “I do get fuming for that. It makes me…”

“Mad in your veins?”

“Er… yeah. Mad in my veins and also mad as fuck at you.”

He laughed.