Dear Girlfriend,

Insight? Yes I have some. You committed prematurely to a man you didn’t really know and don’t even seem to like, most likely because you think this is all you deserve.

Further – rather than recognize the error and cut your losses, you’re spending your time scrutinizing yourself wondering if there is something wrong with you or if there is something you could do differently to make your relationship with this man tolerable. Tolerable?

At best: if you bust your butt, turn inside out and cut off an arm, you might be able to stand this guy. But why, tell me, why would you do that?

I am sorry but I don’t think your relationship is viable. It is a mistake pure and simple and with Saturn transiting your 7th house, it begs you learn from this. And hurry… and I mean that.

I am sorry to hit you so hard but the best thing that could happen is this blog cause you a crisis that ultimately forces you to take a serious look at your behavior in relationships. Because Saturn is at the end of your 7th house not the beginning and if you don’t get hip…. well it will be like graduating from high school illiterate. So here is a crash course:

You met a guy… finally met a guy. Feeling desperate and lonely you pressed for a commitment and if you read through the rest of your post, the whole thing is a bid to control to avoid the doom you are sure is coming! And I ask you, is this any way to live?

Now he is hopeless as far as an honest relationship goes and there is nothing you can do about that, but you can work on yourself and this is what I would do. Get a therapist! And please don’t be insulted by that. I had to get a therapist! And thank God I did, it was the best money I ever spent!

I’ll apologize one more time, but I can’t stress this enough. Forget the guy and get some help. You’re heading into your Saturn return, in the 8th house no less and this stuff needs to be addressed. When? Now. Just get yourself to a therapist and tell them what you just told me and you’ll be on your way.

I know you’re scared but do it anyway – because your life and happiness are at stake and you are worth it. And for the record, you can totally and absolutely heal and pull out of this. You just need the right associations and this guy is not one of them.

Good luck.

~~
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I just wanted to thank everyone who posted their thoughts on HQ’s post asking for feedback. We both appreciated every comment and are currently trying to assimilate them.

It seems the main complaint is that the site is poorly organized and difficult to navigate. I completely agree however fixing this is beyond my abilities. Seems I am better at being creative, chaotic and random than I am at anything else so we will just have to hope HQ can figure this out and on that note, there is hope.

Because it was HQ who stumbled onto my blog six years ago where I was writing stories like a bat out of hell for no reason I could name outside of the fact people were reading them. And dozens of people told me I should write a book, which is of course as impossible for me as organizing this blog would be.

I explained I was a quilt square maker and nothing more. Although I can churn out these squares…. these blog-sized pieces, I have no idea how to make them into something that works, like a quilt! So that was that. If there were to be a quilt constructed, someone was going to have to show up the skills I lacked and someone did… HQ!

And he helped me put a book together and did a masterful job. Basically he figured it out where I never would have and it makes me smile seeing history repeat like this.

Because I wrote many tens of thousands of pages on my original blog but it took HQ to create something coherent from them. So here I am with this blog…. 1625 blogs and counting and if you are ever to be able to access them, it will be due his energy and expertise. So wish him luck would you?

Thanks again for taking the time to post feedback and thanks also to the people who complimented the content here because it means a lot to me. And if anyone else has ideas, comments or criticisms, by all means don’t be shy.

I met the soldier over the weekend. We collided the same way as last time. He was driving down the interstate one way, I was coming from the other direction and eventually we meet.

And I thought of how our Mercurys oppose and this one of the ways that manifests but the Saturn Neptune opposition (prominent in our composite) plays as well and here’s how:

I was just writing about how people can have very different realities. For example, in my reality I am an upstanding, hardworking citizen, but in the eyes of the Mormon store manager I am a horrible terrible Frito Girl. So driving down the highway I had the music going… Neptune ruled.

And music makes you feel, especially a Venus Neptune type like me, so I realized I was setting my mood with what I chose to listen to. And I was pretty pissed off I have to say. I was driving down the road infuriated! But I was finding it hard to sustain my anger with the music going. In other words, my reality was dissolving. But then I thought of him.

What was he listening to? Because he would be would be setting his mood as well, right? So what about when we come together? Will our stories match? And it hit me how fluid reality really is. So there’s your Saturn Neptune opposition.

You have to ask yourself if you can’t control your own feelings, how can you possibly think you’re going to be able to control another persons. Yet people try, don’t they?

The day starts out fairly innocuous but by the afternoon the Moon in Scorpio aspects the Saturn Neptune opposition. And it is my fond hope that people have become somewhat more sophisticated with this energy as it’s been hanging around long enough. Can you ride the wave when your reality dissolves? Try it!

Can you disappear your fear and replace it with faith? Can you relinquish control and let the universe deliver in its own way on its own schedule? Here’s an example:

The soldier and I have the Saturn Neptune opposition laid across the asc/des axis of our composite chart.

Is our relationship defined? No. And does this make any difference? No.

If you can grok this and apply this to your life you’ll feel the magic.

Dear Wife,

I wish I could make this easy for you but I don’t think it’s possible. The fact is, you are in a long term marriage with kids and while I don’t blame you for wanting to bolt, I don’t think you are going to be able to manage this and I’ll explain.

Right now you are confused. And leaving a marriage is very hard especially with children. So if you are going to do this, you have your mind completely set. Unless you are 100% committed, the odds are overwhelming you will initiate this process only to return to the marriage – initiate, return, etc. – which will not only trash you but your children as well. So I am afraid you are going to have to stay put and suffer through the mulling over of this, until something definitive emerges from the muck.

Now astrologically you have a stellium in Virgo in the 8th house which rules sex, psychology, joint property, etc. And Saturn (your chart ruler) will soon be transiting these planets, in essence waking you up to reality.

And you can see this is coming in because you report your husband is emotionally unavailable and it looks as though you have stumbled onto a key to this. And though it is clear you would rather not use that key and delve into these waters, I do not think you will be able to avoid it.

In fact, these type of issues – sex and all things deep and hidden from view – are going to be front and center in your life for the next two years. And will this be good for you?

It will. I believe you are heading straight into hell – how can you not be? However, when you come out the other side, you are going to be empowered and energized like you never thought possible.

As for immediate coping skills early in this process, I would forget about him. Let him worry about his problem (his wife is going to leave him?) while you get to the library or the bookstore and start reading about psych. I think you will be surprised how you take to the subject and I also think you are going to be fine once you commit to facing this head on. In other words, the major distress right now is in your erroneous thinking you can avoid dealing with this.

Good luck.

~~
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Neith asks:

“Say, speaking of Scorpio, i would love to have your take on the Pluto in Scorpio generation, “hooking up”, piercings, tattoos, etc. Were these kids the catalyst for these trends?”

What occurs to me is that they are psychologically sophisticated. For example my 11 year old daughter today offered her analysis of one of her bullies:

“Her parents keep separating, getting back together, separating and getting back together. I am sure she’s angry and maybe this is why she comes to school and calls people names…”

And what about the whole “emo” thing? So much for putting your fresh perfect face out there like it’s the 50′s and everyone is happy! Feeling states are not only acknowledged, they are respected. You are supposed to have pain for chrissakes!

What do you notice about the Pluto in Scorpio generation?

Jerry Riopelle sings:

“You’re a sailor, on the high seas
Got to wait for the next wind to blow

I’m a river, run a long time
I can take you where you want to go…”

I would like to be a river and I think may be mistaken as one but I’m actually just a very effective sailor. You?

How does this show up in your chart?

The height of cleverness is to be able to conceal it.
– Francois de La Rochefoucauld

The Moon in Libra is involved in a grand trine this morning so we feel okay about the astonishing information that has been delivered over the last couple weeks. Where as some of us (me) saw the veins pop out on their foreheads with all the fervor, we have now adapted and can see a way our lives can benefit by what we have learned.

Everyone is keen right now and anxious to use their new skills and when the Moon moves into Scorpio later today we will begin to apply our new knowledge.

Never mind how the information was delivered. Don’t you feel smarter than you were a week ago?

Dear Man,

Well you’re right on schedule. You have Saturn in Pisces at 0 degrees, about to be opposed by Saturn in at 0 degrees Virgo in September – and here you are taking a look at the structure and the reality (Saturn) of how you are living in relation to your age. The point is to take stock and make corrections as needed and in this case it seems a correction is going to be necessary. Because bottom line, you want to grow up and she (probably quite rightly) does not!

So there are issues of control (Saturn) here, in that you want her to her to conform and show up for your relationship… as if it were a job? I’m not saying it’s like this but I would not be surprised if she thinks it’s like this and you start to get the idea here.

It seems this gal likes you just fine. She likes to dance anyway. But as far as settling down, this is obviously is not her priority and I don’t think that’s likely to change.

I don’t think it’s likely to change because people rarely get more enthusiastic over their partner in year 3 or 4 than they were in year 1. Also, as people settle into relationship they become more “themselves” not less, and it seems this gal is and wants to be a free bird.

So this leaves you with reality. You have a girlfriend who has limits and those limits are very likely to constrict not expand. How you weigh this and what you do about it is going to be up to you.

Good luck.

~~
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