On Gossip, Candor And The Screening Of Prospective Lovers: Men With a Weak Mars
Ask the Collective
Denis and I were talking about the Aquarian in Gemini clothing…
Yeah, well he said I had a secret admirer, Denis. And I told him, I don’t want to know about it. I want a man with a heat-seeking missile. What’s he doing talking to you? He should be talking to me. I can tell you right now, whoever he is, I’m not interested.”
“You told him that?”
“Of course I told him that,” I said. “Please don’t waste my time. He was interrupting my workout with this. To chat about this as if it’s going to be fun or interesting or engaging in any way. As if I am going to care about some dumbass in the locker room who thinks I am cute. Is this high school?”
Denis laughed. “You don’t want that, do you. Ilsa? You want a man who is in your face. Not a man who is talking behind your back.”
I laughed. “Yes, that is it exactly. Can you imagine what kind of lover a guy like would be? I can. Thank God I’ll never have to actually endure it in real life. If a man is afraid to talk to me, how the hell is supposed to be in a bed with me? I guess he’d run screaming from the room in terror.” I snorted. ‘Anyway, that’s that. We’ll see what happens next. The saga continues.”
“Yes, Ilsa. Life goes on, doesn’t it?”
“And this is how these women end up with lousy men… men who don’t please them, you know. They don’t pay attention in the beginning. As far as I am concerned whoever this guy is, he’s already shown himself to be inept. For some women they’d like that but for me?” I laughed. “They should probably stay away from me for their own safety. Because I am so annoyed with this kind of thing there is no telling what I might say if approached.”
Do you pay attention in the beginning?

6 Responses to “On Gossip, Candor And The Screening Of Prospective Lovers: Men With a Weak Mars”
Typically I do. For some reason though, I didnt when I was dating my now hub. I ignored all the signals. I dont know where my head was.
What do you consider a “weak Mars”?
Hmmm, I never thought about it that way before Elsa. But what if you’re not the type to like guys all up in your face?
So are you saying that if they’re shy around you they’re going to be lousy in bed?
Not lousy in bed perhaps… but maybe a bit too passive for some.
You bet I pay BIG attention to this in the beginning. If a guy isn’t up front- in your face- Í’ve found he just dosn’t carry the amount of passion & fire I need. I’ve ignored my intuition a couple of times… thinking maybe, if he had the chance to fire up, he would! But I was wrong. If it ain’t there at the get go… it’s usually not there at all.
Luck for us all that it takes all kinds, as they say =)
Funny, after re-reading your post Elsa, I can see where you’re coming from. If some guy went through someone else to get to me, I’d probably be annoyed too, lol.
So did that guy ever approach you, or did he give up?
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Yeah. I once refused to date a man twice after he gave me a little lecture on how he didn’t want to “get all heavy in a relationship.” Like, hello?! I thought we were having coffee! Someone needed to take Dating 101. The irony is that he likely thought I wouldn’t want to date him again because I “wanted a relationship”