Sisters Relating: Venus Conjunct the Sun in Synasty

January 21st, 2006 @ 5:10 am by Elsa

Dear Elsa,

My old sister’s an Aquarius and I’m an Aries. Our signs are usually considered a good match astrologically, but we’ve had a rough relationship ever since childhood. I worry too much about her approach to men, as well as her emotional detachment – which has her staying in these painful, sometimes abusive situations.

Conversely, I am very sensitive and emotional and tend to ‘feel’ her pain or overreact to it. She is very strong-willed (as am I), and I find it hard to communicate with her about these topics. I think our relationship could use a lot of work but I am not entirely sure how to approach it.

There’s a lot of angst in our sisterhood, but of course a lot of love. Even though we’re not on bad terms per se, it’s been a couple months since we’ve seen one another and I don’t think either of us really knows how to relate to the other.

Any general advice?

Yours truly,
Saddened Sister

aqDear Saddened,

Did you know your Venus is in Aquarius conjunct your sister’s Sun… and hers is in Aries conjunct yours? That’s pretty sweet. The love is there and that’s really nice. Regarding the whole relationship though, I do have some thoughts.

I’m going to direct them towards you, but this is not because I think you’re at fault. It’s because you’re the one asking and for all I know, she likes things the way they are!

It’s a boundary thing, see. What occurs to me is first is your sister is not unemotional or lacking in sensitivity. Not with her Moon conjunct Neptune conjunct her ascendant, she’s not. And I imagine she does not like being characterized in this way, just because she is rebellious and independent.

Bottom line: with her Sun, Venus, Mars in Aquarius, she is not going to have anyone dictate her behavior… which is where you come in. Aries is a Cardinal sign, yes? And the Cardinal signs like to control things.

If you read your post up there, you can see that you are attempting to act as the General of her life and basically, she is flipping you the bird. This is true, even if your motivation is compassionate (and I believe it is). So if you want to alter this dynamic, you will have to curb your tendency to want to run her life. Because I promise you, she will never allow that.

Good luck.
~~
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Advice, Astrology, Siblings comment on post   |   Posted at 5:10 am 

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