About that yin flying thing, one time I was on a plane with my daughter who was about 8 at the time but she is smart as a whip. She was sitting in the window seat, I was center and there was a full size man on the aisle, maybe 6′2″ and 240 pounds.

I was having no problem, the flight attendant had just cleared our lunch when I turned back from chatting with my daughter to see the man has fallen asleep.

Five minutes later, he had slumped down, leaned over and had his entire head lying on my tray table, sleeping like a baby with his head in my lap, drool and everything.

Of course I thought this was hysterical, as did my daughter…

“I thought I was your mother,” I said.

She roared. “Are you going to leave him?” she asked.

“Well, yeah,” I said. “How am I supposed to move him?”

“Oh, Mom. My mom is a mom.”

This is what happens when you’re super yin and have a grand trine in Earth. Capricorn too. These babies just find you. That guy slept in my lap for almost and hour.

Do you attract babies or no? Where’s your Moon and how’s it aspected?

Today I was walking into the gym and ran into my counterpart, a gal who loves the cross-trainer as much as I do. We are connoisseurs of the machine and the other day she was off and I was getting on and knowing she would know, I asked her, “Which is the good one?”

See, I hadn’t been to the gym in awhile and the machines are in various states of disrepair. I hate when they click or they are sluggish or under perform in anyway and I know she feels same and the “best machine” is variable as weeks pass.

“Third one from the end,” she said with her trademark grin.

So I got on that machine that day and then this morning we hit the gym at the same time so you know what that means? It means only one of us get the good machine and to my mild shock and chagrin I realized I would defer and give it to her. I would sacrifice, see and I can’t say I was all that happy about. Why does it have to be this way? How come she gets the good machine just because she’s a boy-girl?

But then I remembered the airplane… here is a little Pluto in Sagittarius, travel psychology for you: It is simple fact, when people sit next to each other on a plane whoever is dominant will take the shared armrest and the person like me… the person with the yin chart will keep their elbows in so consequently I am forever flying scrunched.

Do you take the shared armrest on a plane, or do you allow the other person to dominate? How’s this jibe up with your chart?

Dear Girlfriend,

Well, I like you the way you are. You sound plenty sweet to me and caring as well, so I think your boy is lucky to have you. But never mind that. If you think you have a problem with your personality, I will try to help.

You are about 75% yang. Your energy is overt and super fiery but you also have a mothering side. And it sounds like your Virgo boy relates to your yin qualities. He is at ease with your planets in Scorpio in the 4th house, but struggles with the fact you’re a born alpha dog. So what to do?

Well if you’re motivated - and it sounds like you are - you can become aware of this and try to switch gears in the circumstances where he finds you abrasive. Apparently when you are home (4th house), your yin side dominates. So armed with this, you can opt to instantly soften your voice when he contacts you in another scenario. I think this will be challenging but if you feel it is worth it, it’s certainly possible.

What is not possible is that you lose your Yang energy for this guy or any other, because you are who you are and there is nothing wrong with you. So if he insists you conform and resists the idea of embracing these other qualities of yours, I would seriously look for a new boy who can stand the heat… and better yet, enjoy it.

Good luck.

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I mentioned hitting the track in the gym that wraps around the free weight section where all the muscle heads hang out. There are others but it is undeniably male and Marsy up there with all the iron being flung around which gives me both a thrill and a blush.

And I think about cutting across this area (I call it “the pit”) but would never have the courage, fearing and feeling I could get pregnant in the time it would take to short-cut like that, me walking through this minefield of testosterone. But there are women who do venture into this territory and they fascinate me. There are 3 types:

There are some who stand in the area, but they keep to the edge and face away from the men. They are always in pairs and sort in there but not in there. I consider them “in denial”. You know. We’re in here with the men but not really, sort of like gals who go to a singles bar in groups and pretend they are not there to meet men.

The second type dresses scantily and she is there to titillate. You know those girlie posters in auto shops? These are like live versions of those posters and I am amused.

The last type is most interesting to me and also fairly rare. These are feminine women (non-steroid bodies) who can merge and blend with the men. Women who actually fit in the environment seamlessly and every time I see a gal like this I have the urge to interview her. I want her birth data! I think I am attracted because these women are the most exotic to my type.

If you were in the gym, who would your most resemble and who would you find most interesting? Does this show up in your chart?

The other day I advised a gal with six planets in Scorpio she’d do well to associate herself with someone earthy to balance the profound emphasis on water in chart. I didn’t mention it but most her Scorpio is in the 12th house, a water house, so the situation is beyond extreme. And in spite of my very masculine writing (Mercury) I am overly yin and I simply need male energy to feel good.

And I have been aware of this for years and have various ways of getting what I need. I can ride a motorcycle for example. Or I can move into a male barracks.

Whatever it takes… I always find a way to get what I need and as of last week circumstances dictated I fall back on a method I discovered some years ago… walking.

But I don’t walk just anywhere. I go upstairs in the gym where all the big dudes hang out. In the free weight area this is. It’s all huge men and iron up there… it’s all MARS and there’s a track that circles this area, but it’s even more perfect than that.

Because if I just walked by all these grunting men I would be too enormously activated. I would be flooded. But the way its set up, only about a 1/3 of the track is adjacent to the pit of men which is how I see them. You know. Like Vegas! The dealers and the pit bosses are contained in this central area where the regular people (the civilians) cannot trespass.

And this is perfect for me. I am yin going ’round and ’round but in a yang way. Because I can walk f - a -s - t.

And the men actually lift in a yin way if you think about it. They slowly curl the weight, right? Isn’t this glorious? I think so.

So anyway, I walk by them 1/3 of the time, absorbing their energy like a girl-sponge. And then recover for 2/3 of the track, before circling back around to get another hit.

And the fact I am a moving target is conscious and deliberate. I just don’t want to be caught right now, see? I don’t want to deal with the men who are talking to me… targeting me but I also don’t want to lose access to this wonder drug, testosterone. See see how tricky I am?

Is there something (or someone) you know you have to expose yourself to, just to feel normal?

Talkin’ to Kathy, we’re on the phone:

“Okay then, Sunday,” I said. “We’ll meet. You figure it out. Get your boy part fired up and figure out where we’re going.”

“I will! I’m proud of my boy side,” she said.

“Well, yeah.”

“I’m very proud of my boy side,” she said emphatically.

“Well I guess you should be. Just think about it, Kathy. Just think of those women who have no contact with their boy side. Can you imagine the horrible life?”

“Nooooo. No I can’t.”

“I can’t either. Better to have some boy in you, like us!”

“Yeah!”

“Okay, so I’ll see ya.”

“Yep. See ya.”

*click

~~

And on the Mars Mercury conjunction front - we both have this in our chart, we were eating Vietnamese and the place was packed. Kathy said she was taking me on a tour of Southeast Asia and it kills me because she’s got a million planets in Sadge in the 3rd house (communication) and everywhere we go, she can speak the language. Me? Well I just smile prettily and ask for a fork!

But anyway, this place was packed. Pho 79! And I don’t remember what I said, but it must have been filthy because her eyes opened wide.

“Could you say that any louder?” she asked, leaning towards me over the table. Before I could compute what she said, she added, “You could! You could say that louder. Don’t! Don’t,” she implored.

Realizing she was trying to get my attention, I put my fork down. “What?” I asked all baffled.

She just looked at me. A couple seconds later the whole thing registered. “Oh, I was loud. Was I loud?” I asked.

She nodded.

“Sorry.”

“No problem.”

“No problem? Okay, good,” I said, having a quick look around to see the people who might have heard whatever it was I said. “So what were we saying again?” I asked.

On that we both cracked up, and then she went back to her tripe and me to my…big ol bowl of…of….stuff! Pho or 79, I have no idea what they you call it. Kathy and the waiter ordered it for me, you know. I’m from the desert.

So last night, we met for dinner. Thai food, which is “home” for Kathy.

“Well, you definitely act just like a man,” I said. “It amazes me. Going out with you is just like going out with a man. A good man, though.”

“How’s that, Elsie?” she said with her Kathy-grin.

I clenched my fists in a body builder pose and mimicked her voice. “You’re comin’ with me, Elsie! I’m takin’ you out!” I barked. “We’re goin’ somewhere!”

She roared.

“And you called me today,” I said. “Like setting up a date. Are we still going out, you asked. Well yeah, I said. And you said, Okay! I’ll call you back and tell you where we going.”

We both laughed.

“But it’s not like you’re a lousy man. You’re a good one. Thoughtful. Unless you think of somewhere you want to go, you said. See? I can have a vote. If there is somewhere I want to go, that’s fine, but otherwise you’re going to take care of this. And I am going to let you! Because from my perspective, why bother? You’ve got this hard-on so I may as well relax and let you do your thing.”

She roars. “I have a hard-on?” she asked.

“Well, yeah. And we get in here (the restaurant) and what do you do? “Let me help you order, Elsie. Let me do this for you. And I’m sitting over here, thinking what the fuck? So you order. And I let you. Go ahead, Kathy. Figure it out. Fix me up. And I just sit here…”

She laughs her ass off.

“And believe me, if I were sitting here with anyone but you, I would order my own food, you know. I know how to order food, Kathy…”

She banged the table with her hand and laid her head down, choking on her laughter, so I moved in for the kill.

“And what about outside? We meet in the parking lot and what did you say?”

“What?” she asked, poised to laugh at herself.

I raised my voice to a Kathy-squeal. “Oh, Elsie!” I said screechingly. “Look at your toes! You painted your toes red,” I said.

She snorted.

“Just like a man! Don’t you know that’s what men do? It is! When they’re on a date, they always find something about you. The ones that get laid do, anyway. They find something to like about your appearance and they say something. Oh honey! Your hair looks so good. Is that a new broach?”

At this point, she’s got her head laying on the table, heaving with laughter. Her whole body is convulsing. Mine too.

“They try to notice something about your appearance. They act just like you. So anyway, Kathy, yes. As far as I am concerned, you’re a man…”

After dinner, she orders dessert and proceeds to wolf it down.

Being girlish, I defer as if thinking, “Dessert? Who me? No, thanks. Everyone knows it goes straight to your hips…”

The End

I went out with Kathy the boy-girl last night and she is starting to see that she really is like a man. From my perspective this is! And with her third house (Gemini) packed with Sagittarius, what could possibly be more “interesting” than a different perspective?

So anyway, all that Sadge is yang, as is the 3rd house. But she also has a Leo Moon (yang) in the 11th house (yang). So you can see she is over the top on this front and in contrast to me - A super yin type, save my Mars Mercury conjunction which will definitely cuss you out and perhaps beat up your car with a bat, if sufficiently provoked.

Now I don’t think either of us would act so near our respective poles with other people. For example, if Kathy was with someone with more of a yang nature, you would probably see more of her yin side and vice versa with me. But as it is, when you put us together…well it’s just extreme. And she doesn’t see it, though she’s beginning to. Mostly because she constantly shocks me with her raging hard-on behavior and I simply have to comment. The first time I mentioned this was a couple weeks ago. We were on the phone.

“You’re such a man, Kathy. Jesus.”

She roared. “Oh Elsie, what do you mean? I’m not a man,” she said.

Being yin, I let it drop. But three minutes later, we were discussing the message board where I posted, which led her to my blog, which led her to contact me for a consultation. And it turns out she was in contact with another woman from that board…

“Yeah!” she said. “She’s jealous!”

“Jealous?”

“Yeah! Because we’re friends,” she said boastfully. “Because I live here and she doesn’t! I’m hanging out with you. We’re hanging out!”

I didn’t answer. I was just amazed.

“And I told her, that’s right! She’s mine!” she said all aggressively. She was shouting. “Elsie’s mine! I got her! I got her and you didn’t! So there!”

I snorted. Got me? What am I? Kathy’s conquest? Here I am, a notch on Kathy’s belt and who knew?

I laughed but I didn’t say why. Figured I’d clue her in later.

To be continued…

And what about you? Yin or Yang or both?

~ skip to part two