Quite a few people who have Mars in aspect to Pluto surfaced on the Evolutionary Astrology Perspective piece to say they had been molested. While this manifestation is certainly not a given, I would say the fact that someone with an aspect between Mars and Pluto in their chart is at increased risk is undeniable.

Now I just heard from a mother of a daughter who has Mars in aspect to Pluto in her chart and being as she can read a chart, she keeps extra close tabs on her but is that enough? I don’t think so. Because that energy is going to be expressed one way or the other. You can’t just “avoid” something in your chart… something that is part of your destiny.

Continue reading Astrology And Children: What If Your Child Has Difficult Aspects In Their Chart… Like Mars Pluto Suggesting Sexual Abuse And The Like?

Dear Elsa,

I was wondering if you had ever done a blog on MARS SQUARE, OPPOSITION OR INCONJUNCT PLUTO? This has been my most interesting find to date in this subject. All the men so far with this aspect are congenital adulterers and the female counterparts have been abused physically and sexually molested in their lives. I know of a few women with these apsects who go through one man after another and never learn to be faithful until late in life..and some never do.

One I know who is in her 60’s constantly has at least three men she is seeing (if not more) and this has been going on for since her teens. She travels and has a man every port waiting–and she isn’t a beauty to behold either. Sexual Karma - This info comes from PLUTO-THe Evoutionary Journey of the Soul–Volume 1–by Jeff Green.

Astrology has been a research project for me since the late 60’s and the karmic and spiritual parts have been the most rewarding as it gives us reasons why we are here and what for to overcome…

And here is the question from the researcher:

Do you have Mars in aspect to Pluto? Have you experienced sexual obsession or or have you been sexually molested?

Submit your own open question

Dear Girlfriend,

I don’t know if your boyfriend has a problem or not. I do think it’s possible a person could be curious… about anything. I think a person who has been molested may even be especially curious, and their curiosity just may get the best of them.

By that, I mean they may momentarily lose sight of the fact anything they look at or download exists because a child was exploited and while they’re at it: they may also ignore the fact that child porn is ILLEGAL.

So is it possible your boyfriend just wanted to see what was out there? It is. But does that mean you should not be questioning your relationship? No. I think you should be questioning your relationship. Because look…

You’re twenty years old! Do you really want to be “monitoring” this man’s porn consumption like this? I wonder because when I was 20 years old I was having all kinds of fun. I was having great times and look at you. Are you having fun? It sure doesn’t sound like it.

So these are the type questions you should be asking. Am I happy? Because I don’t think the other questions you have are answerable. Your boyfriend is obviously in the process of some kind of discovery. He may be exploring what happened to him, or he may be discovering he is pedophile himself. And for the record, that he told you he was not stimulated by what he saw means nothing as he is known to be a liar and how many people are going to admit something like that anyway?

So here’s the thing: I don’t think you are happy. It sounds as if your boyfriend’s porn usage drains and weighs on you and you’ve got ask yourself if the grass might not be greener… much greener, somewhere else.

So I would think about that, but also search your feelings around how you feel about the exploitation of children, seeing as you are an exploited child yourself. Because although he deleted the pictures… what will you do if you catch him again? Will you notify the police?

The parents of the kids in those pictures would probably appreciate that very much. And if it is the parents themselves taking the pictures? Well those parents belong in jail.

And how do you feel about turning a blind eye to this… to what you are already aware of? Because I imagine that one of the reasons this has come up in your life is to allow you to ask and then answer these questions for yourself.

And the astrology? You’re a Cancer and you are mothering this guy. You’re trying to control and keep him in line and I don’t know what to say besides it sounds like a bore. 20 years old? I say go get yourself a man who shows you a good time. The man you have now is more like job or a charge of yours. Ugh.

And one more thing. Your snooping? It sucks. I say change your life.

Good luck.

~~
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Dear Confused,

I think your sister has the right to feel hurt or any other way she pleases. But you did nothing wrong. The thing is: with families like yours, boundaries are often very weak. And this seems the situation here. Everybody is in everybody else’s business and nobody knows how to draw lines.

And this is frequently why families break apart the way yours did. People do it to survive. No one can seem to exist without falling into the very painful family stew so they amputate in the hopes of starting fresh and faring better. So now you’re back in and things are starting to constellate and I have some ideas that might help.

First, understand that your boundary was completely appropriate. And your Venus (money) Neptune (sacrifice) conjunction in Scorpio is a very leaky combination so I think you should be congratulated on managing to make it. And from here all you have to do is stick to guns… and hope.

Hope your sister runs through her emotions, which I am sure are complex. And hope she runs through her process whatever it may be, and she comes back to you in saner form. And there is agreement on all fronts I know of, how to best facilitate this which is nice because it makes it very simple.

The 12-steppers remind you to watch your side of the street. That means, keep yourself on track and leave others to do the same. And I have heard another analogy, about a well. Your whole family is in a well! They’re in there, man. And the idea is to get the fuck out of the well. Get yourself out!

And it’s virtually impossible to climb from the well if you keep reaching back in to grab the hands of family members in an attempt to pull them up when they do not want to go. Never mind, half of them want to pull you back in. So no! You’ve got to get yourself out and on to solid ground before you can even think about throwing them a line or no one is going to get out of there!

So with this in mind, I’d advise you stand strong and leave your sister to figure it out. Because these are facts:

Dear In,

No, I don’t think it is your destiny to suffer, I think it’s your destiny to heal and beyond that to help others heal. Who better for that than you? With your vast experience of suffering you are uniquely positioned, don’t you think? I do. But let me address some of these other things.

Your experience is common for survivors of abuse. That is, it’s when you finally get yourself to a place where you have a modicum of security that the shit hits the fan. Because prior to this time, you are functioning in some sort of survival mode. Functioning highly too, something you should be proud of. But now it’s time to heal.

Think of it like a broken bone. Or in your case, twelve or fourteen broken bones. And at the time they are broken, there was no help available. So what happens?

What happens is they heal all jacked up. And you absolutely will walk around like that for the rest of your life it you do not get treatment. Make sense?

So basically you have to go in and re-break these bones. And that’s going to hurt. But once broken, your limbs and various parts can be set with the loving care you deserved the first time around… and this time when you heal, it will be for real and for permanent.

So obviously I think you need to find a counselor. However, I also think your prognosis is excellent and I’ll tell you why. It’s because your problems are so profound. This serves you and I will explain:

You’re 21 and find yourself in this very painful place. And you think your peers, the other 21 year old girls out there do not have to deal with problems of your ilk. And you’re right! Most of them still have their parents, for starters. So they have no idea what you cope with on a daily basis. But here’s the trick.

It’s because your problems are so large that you are finding that you are simply going to have to deal with them. You’re just not going to be able to function if you don’t and so off you go to therapy to emerge in a year or two or three (or whatever it takes, because you’re worth it), feeling whole and healed. And meanwhile what about your peers?

Well I’ll tell you what happens to them. They suffer at a low level. It’s not quite enough to send them to therapy, though. They can fake it, see? And fake it they do, until they are thirty or forty or fifty and this is when it hits them. ‘Crap! I just lived my whole life compromised!” And at that point it’s too late. Too late to get that 30 years back, that is.

Meantime, you’ve spent the last 30 years, on your feet, knowing who and what you are and living true, all courtesy of the investment you made in your 20’s. So you’ve got Saturn conjunct your Sun in Scorpio and that is exactly how you should think of it too. Invest in your psychological health…

And just remember this: Every curse is a gift… in exact proportion.

Much love and good luck.

~~
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Dear Suffering,

First, please adjust your expectations. Of course you can be 100% again. Matter of fact, if you heal this, you will very likely enjoy sex like you never have before. So there is hope, okay? There is tons of hope. There is hope in spades!

Now you said you went to counseling and obviously you need to go back. You need to go deeper to excavate whatever piece(s) is still stuck in you. Think of it like a weed. You lop the top of a weed off what happens? Nothing. You still have a weed. Matter of fact it grows back even stronger. But if you dig that fucker up by the root, you win!! And it takes a lot less time to do this, than it took the thing to grow. So keep that in mind.

I do think you need a professional… someone to guide you but what will really help jumpstart your process is to arrive in their office ready to fight. See, you were supremely powerless back when this happened to you - but at this point, you are an adult woman and it will help greatly if you accept and understand that these days you can kick some ass! So this is what I would advise:

Action! Don’t wait passively for things to improve. Do weeds die on their own? They don’t. They proliferate!! So get in there, and you know, I like that slogan, “Take Back The Night“. Those are very strong words. And they might help you focus on what you’re doing. Fighting for your right to a healthy sex life, that is. Fighting to get your piece of shit stepfather out of your marriage bed, you know?

You can do this. You absolutely can. Go look in the mirror. Look yourself right in the eye and use these words:

“I will not forsake you.”

Then go call a therapist and tell them you want to get down to business, and you want to do it now.

Good luck.

~~
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Dear Venus,

Aw, this sucks. I feel so bad for you. Listen to me, please. You are 23 years old and you’ve got to get your sex life back. You can not let this bastard - whoever it was who abused you - cheat you of one of the primary pleasures in life. And the sooner the better, especially considering the fact you are a Scorpio rising with an 8th house Mars.

Now that describes a very sexual person. This is true regardless of what happened to you. Do you understand? You were born a sexual person. You are supposed to be a sexual person, blah, blah, blah. So do you want to allow this person who abused you to hijack your life? Of course not. I think you ought to fight.

And it may interest you to know that sex and fighting are Mars ruled. That means if I can get you mad… if I can get you pissed off over the idea this bastard has derailed your life… your anger might very well inspire you to fight, which will automatically jumpstart your Mars - your sex drive.

Now I could stop right there and be safe but I am Elsa and I am reckless, so I’m going to tell you more. With an 8th house Mars, there is an interest in “taboo”. And there are parts of your chart that want to say “EEK!” to that. You know. You want to be detached. Or you want to be high minded, in control and so forth.

Well, that’s fine. But if you do not explore this other side yourself… if you cut yourself off from your own sexual energy, I’ll tell you what’ll happen. It’ll turn on you. The energy is there and it needs expression. It needs an outlet. And if you want to understand this plain as day, then look outside yourself.

Imagine a child (or any person for that matter) with one of limbs bound up in some fashion. Can you picture that? One arm strapped behind their back. Over time, what do you think that’s going to do to that person? To their body and their mind and their soul? Don’t you think it would compromise the whole? I do. And do you want to suffer like that just because of some bastard? I don’t think so. I think you should fight for your life.

And the best way to fight is how? By being aggressive. By taking charge! So how about you get yourself really pissed off about this, then get on top of your man and screw him like you never have before. I’m serious. Get on top him and feel your power. Take back your power… and while you’re at it, yelling would be good too. Come on, hon. Fuck the bastard abuser! Take back the night, as they say. Release your demons via sex. Get yourself free and don’t look back.

Good luck.

~~
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