Gerald G. May writes in "Addiction and Grace: Love and Spirituality in the Healing of Addictions":

“Addiction exists wherever persons are internally compelled to give energy to things that are not their true desires.”

Sobering, huh?

Do you give energy to your true desires?

Dear Venus,

Aw, this sucks. I feel so bad for you. Listen to me, please. You are 23 years old and you’ve got to get your sex life back. You can not let this bastard - whoever it was who abused you - cheat you of one of the primary pleasures in life. And the sooner the better, especially considering the fact you are a Scorpio rising with an 8th house Mars.

Now that describes a very sexual person. This is true regardless of what happened to you. Do you understand? You were born a sexual person. You are supposed to be a sexual person, blah, blah, blah. So do you want to allow this person who abused you to hijack your life? Of course not. I think you ought to fight.

And it may interest you to know that sex and fighting are Mars ruled. That means if I can get you mad… if I can get you pissed off over the idea this bastard has derailed your life… your anger might very well inspire you to fight, which will automatically jumpstart your Mars - your sex drive.

Now I could stop right there and be safe but I am Elsa and I am reckless, so I’m going to tell you more. With an 8th house Mars, there is an interest in “taboo”. And there are parts of your chart that want to say “EEK!” to that. You know. You want to be detached. Or you want to be high minded, in control and so forth.

Well, that’s fine. But if you do not explore this other side yourself… if you cut yourself off from your own sexual energy, I’ll tell you what’ll happen. It’ll turn on you. The energy is there and it needs expression. It needs an outlet. And if you want to understand this plain as day, then look outside yourself.

Imagine a child (or any person for that matter) with one of limbs bound up in some fashion. Can you picture that? One arm strapped behind their back. Over time, what do you think that’s going to do to that person? To their body and their mind and their soul? Don’t you think it would compromise the whole? I do. And do you want to suffer like that just because of some bastard? I don’t think so. I think you should fight for your life.

And the best way to fight is how? By being aggressive. By taking charge! So how about you get yourself really pissed off about this, then get on top of your man and screw him like you never have before. I’m serious. Get on top him and feel your power. Take back your power… and while you’re at it, yelling would be good too. Come on, hon. Fuck the bastard abuser! Take back the night, as they say. Release your demons via sex. Get yourself free and don’t look back.

Good luck.

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