Elsa, I’ve been hearing rumblings that the upcoming eclipse on the 20th will be a bad one. The planets have pummeled me this past year…should I hide under the covers on or around the 20th?

Wondering
Canada

Dear Wondering,

I would not bother. For one thing, look at that chart. It’s beautiful. (Click to see full size) See the Mystic Rectangle? When I see something like that, I figure by and large, things are going to take care of themselves but in a broader sense when it comes to day to day astrology, I think this:

We have a lot to say about what kind of day we have. It is true that events occur that are outside our control but so? The odds a bomb is going to land on your head are very, very low so it makes no sense to concern yourself with something like that. It takes energy and for what?

Now I will note it when the sky is horrific but only with this ambition in mind:

“We all live amid surfaces, and the true art is to skate well on them” - Ralph Waldo Emerson

So if the day looks trecherous I will have this is mind. I will “pack my lunch and bring my friends” as they say but worry? No way. Here would be my motto:

“See surface, will skate.”

Anyone else?

Submit your own open question

Randamandar writes:

“From Desiderata- ‘Avoid loud and aggressive people as they are a vexation to the spirit.’

I can hear the Soldier now, You don’t know the meaning of vexation, I’ll show you vexation.”

I called him.

“What do you think of this?” I asked, reading him the quote.

“Well I think that those who are weak, mindless, spineless and never question authority are a vexation to the spirit. What do you think, P? What do people like that do for the spirit? I think I have a lot of spirit and I am loud, aggressive and spirited.  Where is that quote from?”

“The Desiderata.”

“That poem they found in a church in the 1600’s?  Well that’s one of my favorite writings. I don’t recall that part.  But anyway, you have to take that in it’s entirety.  They are probably talking about boisterous bar types.  Blow hards. You know the type. So that’s my interpretaion of that. That’s a different kind of loud and aggressive, I’d say. What do you think happened with that?  The person wrote it and thought it was nothing?”

“Yep, probably wrote it and thought it was nothing…”

Do you think loud and aggressive people vex the spirit? 

Dear Stalemate,

I am not sure you will like my read on this because it definitely reflects my bias but  considering you are Sagittarius I know you appreciate other perspectives so here is mine:

I would let this go. I don’t think you can force someone to learn something or have an interest in something they don’t have an interest in. For example, I always wind up with engineers… people like math and like it a lot. My first husband actually stalked me with a math book. He followed me around the house with the book cracked open, he just wanted to show me how interesting this all was and when he wouldn’t stop, I took off out the front door and headed down the dirt road with 5 planets in Scorpio in pursuit.

Continue reading Open Question - Her Husband Won’t Take The Time To Share Her Passionate Interest

The concept of having a “lot in life” had a negative connotation which seems erroneous to me. I think this is because I think every gift is a curse in exact proportion and vice versa.

People think they have been dealt bad cards but it is well and widely known that almost no one would trade their problems for another’s given the opportunity. For all the problems I do have there is an endless list of problems I don’t have. For example I am not an alcoholic. Whew! ::wipes sweat:: It is not something I would like to deal with.

Could it be we choose the things we DO want to deal with? I think so. I think we choose our parents and our circumstances and everything else.

What do you think? Did you just land here or did you elect this life somewhere along the way?

I like this idea of people sharing their wisdom and experience the way they did on the Love Tips blog. Let’s call it a Jupiter conjunct Pluto in Sagittarius thing (the collective shares their perspective or philosophy) so here’s another query.

What if there is no good option?

I find this situation with my son a lot. Most of you know he has a Sun Saturn conjunction which I feel indicates a difficult childhood. And though I try mightily in my son’s case this has definitely manifested.

I frequently find myself having to make decisions that impact him being fully aware he is going to be hosed regardless of what I do. I think of that old song… “Clowns to the left of my, jokers to the right…” It is sort of like die by knife or die by gun? Ultimately what difference does this make? So how do you handle something like this?

What do you do if all choice suck?

C writes regarding loving and giving:

“That’s truly inspiring……your love! But - don’t you think you have to be ‘careful’ of being that all-engrossed with someone? I’ve read your stories and it does seem like there’s a very profound connection between you and the soldier. So maybe you can just give and give unconditionally. And maybe he gives that way to you too. (I’m hoping!!) I haven’t met my ‘true love’ yet and my experience of giving so much has been painful. I guess I’ve put my love in the wrong people/places. Not completely wrong people, just people who haven’t matched my devotion…”

C - I gave to my ex, the AMF in the same way and can tell you that whether he matched my devotion or not is irrelevant. A relationship may not sustain but I have found I never, ever regret giving my best to anything or anyone.

Matter of fact, the more I access my capacity to love and give, the more love I have to give and the better I feel so while others may benefit, the real beneficiary is me. Just think about it. You can go to sleep at night knowing you loved your best or you can go to sleep making rows and columns or who gave what. What sounds preferable to you? I sleep very, very well.

This is why Venus is exalted in Pisces by the way. It’s because the love is endless, it has no bounds. I should also add, I am not engrossed in someone, I am engrossed in everything I do.

I think with a packed 8th house I am always aware of death and my philosophy, “don’t drive by without stopping” extends even further. Inspired by Zucherro’s song, “No Regrets” about a dozen years ago, I decided I would try very hard to never do (or not do) something that would cause me to have regret and I’ve been fairly successful.

I have mentioned I few times I drive a long way to see the soldier. I routinely drive 5-600 miles just to spend the day with him before I turn around and drive back and maybe now you know why. To not drive to see him would be unthinkable.

How would I like to have him dead next week but I was too busy or lazy to go spend time with him when I had the opportunity? No thanks. Instead I see him every chance I get and give him the best love I have at all times. And I am pretty sure as long as I meet this standard I will be able to cope with loss of whatever kind when it comes.

I learned some of this from HQ who told me some years ago he thought he was a pretty good friend. He said he tried to be the best friend he could be, and if someone decided they did not want him for a friend, he could accept this because he’d know that he tried his best and given his all.

I adopted his philosophy because I realized that it makes no difference what the other person does. If you love them well and they love you lousy, so what? It has no result.

And it turns out people who love well are always in demand and people who withhold and meter out their love… well it catches up with them eventually. You get to be a miserly old bastard I guess.

I do the same thing on this blog. I am never here with half a heart. I give everything I have every single day and consequently everything else is irrelevant.

Hannah S-Q writes regarding potential:

“Clearly, Elsa, you are living up to your potential!”

Hannah S-Q, thank you but I disagree. I am merely living. I don’t think there is a lid on potential. I think potential is endless and no matter how well I am doing I can always do better.

And in fact when someone raises the bar on me, that’s exactly what I do. I meet their expectations if at all possible, expanding my capacity and ability in the process. This is why it’s so important to hang with people who challenge you if you want to progress.

I will say I try very hard though. Living full bore is a way of life for me and it is deeply satisfying. Anything less would be… well I am just not interested.

What satisfies you? Where is your Mars?

The soldier and I over the weekend. He’s a Pisces rising…

“So what do you think it means that you and I wind up here almost 30 years later?” I asked. We were walking back from convenience store eating life savers. “Exactly what do you make of it?”

“Well you can make choices in your life. And the choices can be right at the time or some of them can be wrong but no matter what you do you can’t escape your destiny.”

“We’re destined?”

“Well yeah, don’t you think? I think us being here together proves you can’t escape your destiny. I don’t care what we do, we’re not getting out of this. For example, you can kick me out again or I can leave you I suppose. But even if this is what we do I still think we’ll wind up in an old folks home together.”

“So then we’re 90 and we look at each other and think why didn’t we get this together when we were in our 40’s? Or in our teens?”

“Yeah. Except it doesn’t matter. P. It doesn’t matter what we do. We’re going to be together for a billion years anyway.”

“A billion? You actually think that?”

“Me and you? A billion years? Yeah, I think that. We have all the time in the world. This world or any other worlds that might be out there”

As soon as he said this I realized it was applicable to anything and everything. For example, what if you thought you had a billion years to solve your problem? Would you relax about it? And if you relaxed might the problem be easier to solve or even solve itself?

What if instead of a month, you had a billion years to lose that last 10 pounds? Would this help you?

Lilly asks on the Mars and Sex blog:

“… astrological signs, aspects, etc. often run in families. I’ve often wondered if some people get hornier at certain times of the year because (if they or their partner conceived then) it would produce a child of a particular sign (or with a certain aspect)? What do you think?”

Lilly, I don’t know. But since I feel very strongly that we choose our parents, I would guess it is the soul (the baby) making the decision when to come in and when the parents choose to have sex has little to do with it. For example, my daughter was three weeks early and my son three weeks late. And I know you’re a mother so I bet you agree, once you get these kids it’s very obvious there are no mistakes.

So are humans on this plane smart enough to see all and make these inspired matchings between themselves and their children? Somehow I doubt it.

Anyone else with an opinion?