With Saturn in Libra and people ’round the world getting serious about love and relationship. I often mention how important it is to discern when taking in information and this applies in spades when shopping for a partner.

A lot of people use personal ads to meet potential mates and while there is nothing wrong with this it pays to use your head. For example the personal ad sites are full of predators and I don’t mean people who want to kill you.  Screw you, maybe.

As an example once Scorpio in his 50’s told me that getting women on Match.com was like “shooting fish in a barrel”, so keep that in mind because he’s quite right.

Continue reading Astrology, Tips And Tactics On Attracting Love: Reading Between The Lines Of Personal Ads (And Watching What You Say Between Your Own)

I wrote this in 2006 in response to the comments on the “She’s Destructive” advice posts…

I thought I’d tell the back story to that and elaborate a bit. My sister and I have studied astrology since we were kids. Some years ago, maybe 15 years ago, she told me that she hated people with Saturn in Sagittarius.

As you can see, it’s my whole family who is not politically correct buy in any case, I looked at her and laughed, “Could it be that you’re a Pisces with a Sadge Moon?”

She raised her eyebrow because this had not occurred to her. Classic Pisces oblivion.
Continue reading Dating? Using Astrology To Filter People, It’s Not Such A Bad Idea…

This is hysterical. Er… Structure (Saturn) and perfect your communication (Virgo) to be more appealing.

On writing personal ads, from the TimesOnline:

Formula for a perfect match

“..Actually, your choice of words may not matter as much as you think. And it probably doesn’t matter as much as the magic 70:30 rule. If your ad doesn’t conform to it - with 70 per cent of the ad describing you, and 30 per cent describing your ideal soul-mate - then your doormat is unlikely to be crushed under the weight of replies. Too much about yourself and you risk looking royally self-centered; too little and Guinevere will think that you’re shifty…“ Read the rest…

On speed-dating technique from BBC News:

Study finds ‘best chat-up lines

“…The most successful lines were ones which were impossible to answer with a simple yes or no, such as ‘What’s your favourite pizza topping?’ and ‘Who would you be if you were going on Stars In Their Eyes?’.

Professor Wiseman said at the other end of the spectrum, the worst chat-up lines included ‘I have a PhD in computing’ and ‘My best friend’s a helicopter pilot’. “ Read the rest…

Anyone else got a tip on how to be successful in these environments?

Dear Date,

Welcome to the world of online dating where a lot of people act like flakes. I think this guy is probably gone and if not, he will be before long and it has nothing to do with you.

Aries is famous for starting things they don’t finish. This guy also has a Cancer Moon, part of a grand trine in water and I imagine he’s pretty good with women. He’s manly and sensitive, see? But that does not mean he actually wants a relationship, and if you read between the lines he pretty much told you this.

“I want a challenge” means exactly that. It means he is going out, getting women interested in him and once they are, well hell. Where’s the challenge? So you see what happened here. You liked him; he was successful in engaging you - that’s a successful mission and now on to the next.

I am very sorry if this makes you feel bad but I am not sure it should. Because you have a stellium in Pisces and fantasizing is part of your makeup. So the idea you are going to have and maintain a relationship with a man who lives two hours away is a little bit reaching - the point being, I think both parties acted in accord with their natures. Not to say he shouldn’t call or mail you but when you think about it, what’s that mail supposed to say?

“Don’t wait for me to call or write you because I start things I don’t finish, it’s my makeup?”

You get the idea. Fish another line, Pisces. And no reason to feel bad, this is just not the man you are looking for.

Good luck.

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Dear Perplexed,

Well you have your NERF bat so at least I know you’re safe and you’re likely getting safer by the day. Because personal ads work very much like real estate listings. When a new house comes on the market, there is a flurry of activity for a week or so before interest drops sharply.

So in effect, where you were HOT property a few days ago, you are now lukewarm and cooling rapidly. By the end of the week, you’ll be ice cold and of interest only to necrophiliacs who only exist in small numbers.

I hope you take some comfort in this, Perplexed, and next time think ahead! For example, you could gather shoes while out shopping the garage sales, red tag them, and then set them on a table outside your neighbor’s place. This should fool at least half the ravenous ladies, significantly reducing the risk to your person and coupled with the NERF bat strategy you should be okay.

Good luck.

~~
Have a question? Need advice? Ask here!

I currently have Saturn transiting my 7th house, applying to natal Venus. Saturn is all about reality. Venus and the 7th house - relationships. Just listen to me talk. ::smirks:: I believe the transit is in effect, people.

I was on the phone with pal, Alexa. She’s a Gemini. Cancer rising, Cancer Moon..

“Well, it’s very hard to hook up. You meet someone on Match.com and then go have a date. What are the odds you are going to want to have a second date? Not very good! Think about it. What if it’s you and you meet someone new. Not a lover, just someone you meet out there, and say you have lunch with them.”

“Yeah?”

“What are the odds you are going to want to have lunch with them again? Ever? With your life as busy as it is? You have all this stuff going on now once a week you are going to want to hook up with this person in your busy life. Think that happens often?” I asked.

“No. Not very often.”

“Right! And starting a relationship with someone is a much bigger deal. It requires a lot more than lunch once a week! What are the odds you are going to fall in love with that person? The odds are poor! Chances are, you’re going to be bored out of your mind. Or you’re going to think, that was okay but I can’t see any reason to do it again. Too much trouble. Really, this person is sort of a pain in the ass!” I laughed. “Really, I’m just saying it is not easy to run out there and hook up if you are meaning to do it with any kind of substance.”

Later, on the phone with Scott:

“Yes, it’s very hard to find someone you actually love. It’s hard to find a friend!”

“You’re telling me,” he said.

“Right! I don’t have to tell you, I know. But you see what I mean. I just got this new friend, Kathy. And I am lucky about that. Do you know when the last time I got a new friend was?”

“When?”

“Four years! It’s been about four years. So that’s it. Every four years you get a new friend…a real friend. And then how hard to you think it is to find a lover? Someone you actually love.”

“It’s hard,” he said. “Very hard.”

“Yep. So you’ve just got to be smart, that’s all I can say.”

~~
And another one:

“Okay, well think about it. The guy is running through women. He’s stuck his dick in 21 women this year and now he wants you to be number 22! Like you’re going to do that? Like you’re an idiot? He’s the idiot! What? He’s going to stick his dick in the 22nd woman this year and this time get a different result? What’s he thinking? This time I’m gonna fall in love? Who is he kidding? It’s ludicrous! It’s insane. It’s the stupidest thing I ever heard! And then he wonders why he’s bereft.”

!!!

With the Mars Saturn conjunction in the sky, I have been having conversations like this all day. Egads! But if anyone needs a reality check regarding relationships, dial me up, I’m ready to rail!

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