Some years ago I was dating a lot of men. There was a huge stream of them but I was unable to connect, over and over and over and over and my friend, Ben and I were analyzing the situation.

If you’re a heterosexual woman it’s very good to talk to a gay man about men because nobody understands men better than homosexual man. This is just a fact. They know a zillion men, they are a man and they sleep with men. How are you going to top that?

Continue reading 4 Years Ago On The Elsa Blog: Learning To Be Comfortable In Your Un-Comfort Zone: Conversations With Ben

My mother came up on the boards. It made me think of this strange occurrence, I wrote about in 2006.  For newcomers, “Ben” is a lifelong friend of mine.

Ben and I met at work. The unusual friendship was growing and we had begun to pal around together outside of work. This was about 25 years ago.

Continue reading Astrology and Synchronicity: My Mother And Ben

I spoke with, Ben last night for 3 1/2 hours per our habit. We routinely go a month or two without talking but when we do talk it is depth. I called him to run my recent psych-minded thoughts by him.

I told him about the pledge of allegiance and the gay bath house connection and in the process realized I had done similar intense probing with the soldier. I have quizzed the hell out of him around some of his missions and in fact detailed this to an extent when I wrote about The Thing On The Other Side Of The World That Changed Our Lives.
Continue reading Conversations With Ben Under The Scorpio Moon

I was talking to Ben about how I’ve changed in the last couple years due what I have gone through with my daughter and my association with the soldier. Ben is life long friend… 10th house Scorpio Sun with an Aquarius rising.

“But I’m happy,” I said. “I am happy.”

“You’re either happy or you’re in a snit,” he said.

I thought a second. “That’s pretty much it, isn’t it?”

“Yep. If I’m not happy it’s because I’m in a snit. Got my panties in a wad. Got to get those panties unhinged, they’re riding right up my crack…”

Could it be this simple?

Are you happy… or in a snit?

Ben is half-white/ half-black, a gay cello player and teacher. We have been very close friends for twenty years. He’s a Scorpio, with an Aquarius rising and an Aries Moon. Here he defends (Saturn) his eccentricity (Uranus).

Ben has taught cello in the local school system for 20 years… barefoot. He plays with various symphony orchestras, same way. Barefoot. I dialed him up one night.

“Hello?”

“How are you, Ben?”

“Okay, Elsa. Except someone called me eccentric, today.”

Aquarius is known to be eccentric. “Yeah?” I asked.
Continue reading Conversations With Ben - Saturn Opposite Uranus: Defending Eccentricity

Dear Elsa,

How do you deal with a friend who’s suddenly become competitive in the workplace? Recently we were both helping a student with a question, and afterward, she accused me of trying to make her feel stupid (the student had finally gotten the right answer from me).

I was shocked that she’d had such little self control to say that to me in front of students. She apologized later, but this behavior is carrying over into the daily interactions with other employees. Does one ignore or approach this one?

Teacher
United States

Continue reading Open Question - Competition In The Workplace: Astrology-Based Advice

Kingsley wrote on the Salina, Kansas blog:

“Its good to be popular that’s for sure”

Kingsley, that is interesting because just last week I was discussing this with a friend. She said most people desired to be popular and/or famous and did not understand people who did not. I am someone who does not and the soldier is someone for whom that goes double.
Continue reading How Do You Feel About Being Popular? Good? Bad? Indifferent?

When Ben and I met I was coming off a lost love and a death in the family and Ben was coming off the equivalent. We were both about six months post trauma when we found each other, person who made sense to us and better yet a person we could make sense too. We ran like this for about 6 or 8 months, slowly healing each other in the process. He’s fixed; I’m not so I left first, quitting the job we had in common.

We continued to see each other and we were on the phone constantly until eventually I got involved with a man and at that point our lives began to separate out. We went from seeing each other five or six times a week, sometimes twice a day to a once-a-week soup date and quick (for us) phone call every few days. Continue reading A Venus Saturn Relationship Story… Elsa and Ben and Their Mismatched Sexualities - Time Passes And Reality Crystallizes

So this heterosexual woman and that homosexual man figured out how to spend time together outside work but after awhile we wanted to get out his bedroom! We did hang in there for hours, talking. He had a mattress on the floor which so many Scorpios do and though I was initially uncomfortable he was not so I eventually relaxed and it was about 90% not weird for me.

But that aside, we did want to leave the bedroom which proved to be another challenge.

Though Ben was from every big city in this country, we lived in the fairly conservative desert and being as it was 25 years ago there was really only one place we could show up together where we would not make everyone uncomfortable. Thank God for those lesbians!! Continue reading A Venus Saturn Relationship Story… Elsa and Ben and Their Mismatched Sexualities - Part 3, the Lesbians

We are both in out 20’s here by the way. I am about 23, Ben is about 27…

So eventually Ben’s friends staring daggers at me unnerved me to an extent that became intolerable and I told him I was not coming to his house if it were full of fags. I said fags because that was how we talked back then.

‘There is just too many of them, Ben. There are sometimes 15 or 20 of them at your house and I have to walk through them with all of them drawing back as if I have the plague,” I said. Continue reading A Venus Saturn Relationship Story… Elsa and Ben and Their Mismatched Sexualities - Part Two