Dear Elsa,

How do you deal with a friend who’s suddenly become competitive in the workplace? Recently we were both helping a student with a question, and afterward, she accused me of trying to make her feel stupid (the student had finally gotten the right answer from me).

I was shocked that she’d had such little self control to say that to me in front of students. She apologized later, but this behavior is carrying over into the daily interactions with other employees. Does one ignore or approach this one?

Teacher
United States

Continue reading Open Question - Competition In The Workplace: Astrology-Based Advice

Kingsley wrote on the Salina, Kansas blog:

“Its good to be popular that’s for sure”

Kingsley, that is interesting because just last week I was discussing this with a friend. She said most people desired to be popular and/or famous and did not understand people who did not. I am someone who does not and the soldier is someone for whom that goes double.
Continue reading How Do You Feel About Being Popular? Good? Bad? Indifferent?

When Ben and I met I was coming off a lost love and a death in the family and Ben was coming off the equivalent. We were both about six months post trauma when we found each other, person who made sense to us and better yet a person we could make sense too. We ran like this for about 6 or 8 months, slowly healing each other in the process. He’s fixed; I’m not so I left first, quitting the job we had in common.

We continued to see each other and we were on the phone constantly until eventually I got involved with a man and at that point our lives began to separate out. We went from seeing each other five or six times a week, sometimes twice a day to a once-a-week soup date and quick (for us) phone call every few days. Continue reading A Venus Saturn Relationship Story… Elsa and Ben and Their Mismatched Sexualities - Time Passes And Reality Crystallizes

So this heterosexual woman and that homosexual man figured out how to spend time together outside work but after awhile we wanted to get out his bedroom! We did hang in there for hours, talking. He had a mattress on the floor which so many Scorpios do and though I was initially uncomfortable he was not so I eventually relaxed and it was about 90% not weird for me.

But that aside, we did want to leave the bedroom which proved to be another challenge.

Though Ben was from every big city in this country, we lived in the fairly conservative desert and being as it was 25 years ago there was really only one place we could show up together where we would not make everyone uncomfortable. Thank God for those lesbians!! Continue reading A Venus Saturn Relationship Story… Elsa and Ben and Their Mismatched Sexualities - Part 3, the Lesbians

We are both in out 20’s here by the way. I am about 23, Ben is about 27…

So eventually Ben’s friends staring daggers at me unnerved me to an extent that became intolerable and I told him I was not coming to his house if it were full of fags. I said fags because that was how we talked back then.

‘There is just too many of them, Ben. There are sometimes 15 or 20 of them at your house and I have to walk through them with all of them drawing back as if I have the plague,” I said. Continue reading A Venus Saturn Relationship Story… Elsa and Ben and Their Mismatched Sexualities - Part Two

My friend Ben and I are a good example of Venus with Saturn. We have been very close friends for about 25 years. The relationship (Venus) has its limits (Saturn) based on the fact I am a heterosexual woman and he is a gay man. And if you think that doesn’t matter, it does.

Ben has always been wildly popular with other gay men. And though we hit it off from the minute we met, his other friends were not very welcoming. Because gay men don’t really like me as a rule. Continue reading A Venus Saturn Relationship Story… Elsa and Ben and Their Mismatched Sexualities

This is my pal, Ben talking over the weekend.

“Elsa, she is mean. She’s mean and she’s smart. She is a very smart women. She’s smart, she’s calculating, she’s cutthroat and she has green eyes that shine like flashlights. Oh but she’s a smart woman, however she is going up against me of course.”

I laughed.

“Yeah, so she’s in trouble. You know I’ll going to win. I always win.”

“Green eyes that shine like flashlights? That’s pretty good.”

“Well that’s exactly what she has. And they take in light too. They absorb the light rather than shine it out so just imagine that.”

“I don’t think I want to.”

“Exactly. But don’t worry, Elsa. I prevailed. The green-eyed monster has been silenced.”

I was talking to a pal, she’s a Pisces.

“I had an idea for your show,” she said. “You could have a segment called, ask a Pisces.”

I laughed.

‘Yeah and I could do it. I’m a Pisces,” she said, brightly.

“What would it be like?” I asked. Continue reading ElsaElsa - The Astrology Show… Ideas!

It’s Ben. Scorpio with an Aquarius rising. He just bought a house after renting the same house foe 20 years! He’s moving now.

Briiiinnnng Briiiiinng!

“Ben, are you busy? Are you still moving?”

“Elsa, yes I am. I have so much stuff. There are a lot of people helping me but I just have so much stuff.”

“Well you’ve lived there a long time,” I said.

“Yes I have. But I also don’t get rid of anything. I hold on to everything.”

In my head, I recalled he is still pissed off at his parents for throwing out his toys when he was a kid.

“For example, I still have my old mailbox. The one from my house on Fremont Street, where I lived when you met me? I’ve got that.”

I laughed. That was 25 years ago.

Ben and I, still catching up. We were discussing the soldier.

“Well Ben, it’s just this unfathomable level of maleness,” I said. “Maleness from another world. Chivalry I guess. My kind of maleness.”

“Tell me what you mean,” he said.

“Well for example, take that helmet incident. We were outside a bar and I was swinging this helmet at him. I was yelling. I was mad as a hornet, you can imagine.”

“Yes?”

“So we’re out in parking lot… big scene. And apparently two men started walking up behind me. They were going to grab me, the crazy banshee, I guess. I don’t know what they were thinking or going to do. I didn’t even see them coming up. I was busy swinging and swearing at him but he saw them over my shoulder in between dodging my attempts to kill him, that is and you know what he did?”

“What?”

“He yelled at them, you leave her alone! Don’t you even think about laying a hand on her! She can swing that helmet or whatever else she wants to do. Touch her, and you’ll deal with me.” I laughed. “Can you believe that? I’m standing there trying to kill him and he going to defend my right to do it. This was his organic response at 19 years old. And I had to stop and think, standing there with a helmet in my hand. Jeez. Do I really want to kill this guy? Hey. Maybe I ought to not kill this guy. Because this is an actual maaaaaaaaan I’m killin’ here,” I said with a chuckle. “And as a man who likes men, surely you can appreciate this.”

“I do appreciate it,” he said. “I like that.” (Ben has an Aries Moon)

“Yeah, so do I. So he’s got this automatic reflex to defend a woman in a culture where a man can beat his wife and his pal will take him out and buy him a beer and it really is something to behold. And he was just a skinny kid back then but that didn’t seem to matter. He acted on instinct. It’s as if he is a Mars archetype, born to defend women and children and to witness this automatic reaction… well it stopped me dead in my tracks. Who is this person? What is going on here? It was because the thing was that pure and after he did this, I quit swinging at him.”

“You did?”

“Yeah. I started swinging at his bike instead.” I laughed. “You know. I still had this adrenaline going but after he defended… protected me like that, I did decide to not try to kill him. He had proved to be on my side. But you get my point. His instinct is to protect a woman and he just responds to this kind of stimulus like something going off in his head. No training about it. This was long before special forces.”

Is their something “pure” about you?