Saturn in Virgo is sitting on top the raging inferno that is the Moon, Venus, Mars conjunction in Aries.
“I thought you were fat in the Army,” I told the soldier knowing he was not fat but mistaken as such by their metric due his odd body shape.”
“I was never fat! I didn’t have a belly like I do now. They’d send me to the hospital to be weighed underwater and I was always all muscle. I didn’t have any fat.” (swearing below the break)
Speaking of the Moon (mothering) conjunct Uranus and opposing Saturn, I ran into something yesterday I hope to convey because it’s just so important… in my opinion. Others may disagree and vehemently but I’ll tell you, this was crushing for me. Crushing and instructive.
Yesterday my son was sent in to meet the lions. Never mind who did it, it happened and by the time I realized what was going on it was too late to stop him unless I were to stop traffic, leap buildings and move heaven and earth. I called the soldier…
Continue reading Voice Of Mars: Mothers And Sons
Aquarian Musician Has Talent But Can’t Quite Make First Chair: Astrology-Based Advice
Dear Elsa,
One of my occupations is performing the flute. It seems as if I’m always placed second chair when I feel I can do better. Then, on those rare occasions when I do get to play first, circumstances are such that prevent me from doing my best, and it makes me want to shoot myself in front of the director because now he thinks I’m not a good player.
Other instrumentalists see my worthiness for first chair, but when I actually get the spot, something always goes wrong. For instance, a few months ago I had a beautiful solo as first chair, but that time was extremely stressful for me at my other job (teaching), and I had a nasty cold and a massive abscess in my nose that was spewing mucus and giving me the biggest headache. Needless to say, I messed up because I was in physical pain and found it so hard to focus.
Then, a few weeks ago I was assigned first flute for another gig, but my music didn’t arrive until 2 days before the rehearsal! I had only 48 hours to learn 15 pieces, whereas everyone else in the group got their music on time and had plenty of time to practice. Needless to say, I messed up.
This seems to be a recurrent trend since age 13, where I feel slighted out of first flute position. I’m starting to feel as if this is my destiny… to always be in the second spot, and if I am in the limelight, something’s gonna go wrong. Is there something in my chart that indicates that I’m meant to suck whenever I’m in the limelight? Or is this a 14 year long transit of some sort, astrology’s cruel joke on my performance career?
Or do I really suck, and my chart indicates that I have major ego issues or an unrealistic picture of my abilities? I’m usually not someone who asks for help, but on this topic, I am at the end of the straw! I would greatly appreciate some insight from you. Thanks!
Aquarian
United States
Dear Aquarian,
No you don’t suck but I think your problem is complex and beyond what can be resolved in this format. But I can give you a few tips to which others may relate.
Regardless of its nature, when you have a pattern this well established it’s a safe bet you are going to have to work very hard to change it. It’s as if you have cut a path and you can be sure to fall right into it every time… if a struggle for consciousness is not made. As to the specifics of what is driving all this, I can see a couple components right off the bat.
First you have Venus in Capricorn, which gives an innate feeling of unworthiness as well as both a fear of failure AND success. This is probably subconscious to a degree but you can see it play out in that you make sure one way or the other that you do not hold that top position.
Now you also have Mars in aspect to Neptune, which tends to dissolve the drive when a person does not act consciously. For example, your music did not arrive on schedule, but why not go hunt it down?
If you can focus on and resolve just these two things, you would be well on your way to solving your problem and I can also tell you that that victim position will never, ever, ever work. In other words, your “close but no cigar” pattern is not due an oppressive force outside yourself.
I hope this does not strike you as harsh or critical because it is not meant that way. Personally, I would like to see you in the first chair and I am pretty sure this is the path to take to get there.
Good luck.
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Capricorn Woman Has A Boss Who Is Attracted To Her: Astrology-Based Advice
Dear Elsa,
My mind is a mess. I followed my husband to a new country six months ago, we’ve been together for five years. We’re not married but we live together and our feelings pretty much are the same. We love each other but fight a lot and keep our financial independence but share bills and expenses. So far everything is normal but I started working in an office. It never crossed my mind my boss would develop feelings towards me since he shouted at me and was very harsh all the time. He is married but his wife is living in another city. They see each other weekly.
Last month his wife started to pressure him to fire me. She said I was too arrogant and probably would have an affair with her husband which wasn’t true then and isn’t true now. I tried my best to treat her with courtesy so she could feel that I am not a threat and I’ve succeeded to a point. I even laughed at the idea that we would fancy me because we are so different and stubborn.
Two weeks ago he told me he did fancy me a while ago but he had gotten over it. I laughed and told him I did not believe him and since that moment he has started to pressure me and make me believe he really cares for me. I tried to explain to him that I don’t feel the same way. I do care about him but not that strongly. Deep down I don’t want anything bad to happen to him and that’s about it.
I decided not to go to work but the next day he called me repeatedly and begged me to return. I came back mostly because I need the money and my husband is very strict so I did not want him to suspect anything. But things aren’t good. He still pressures me and I warn him I’ll go away. He insists he cares about me and loves his wife. I love my husband but sometimes feel I am losing control because of all the stress. Everyone tries to control me, my feelings and my decisions. I could try to find another job but deep down I don’t want that. I want things the way they were before.
I want to push my boss away gently but I don’t know how to do that without losing my job and him and me and my husband. I am losing my mind and I don’t want to talk to anyone about it. I need good strong objective advice.
Workplace Attraction
Romania
Dear Workplace,
What a complicated situation. I am sorry but I don’t think you are going to be successful in pushing your boss away gently. He is clearly attracted to you and I would expect this to increase not otherwise. Secretly I think you may like this some. It’s good for the ego and you have a Leo Moon and I don’t mean to judge this. I just think acknowledging it will give it less power to keep you so beguiled with your own life.
There is that but you’ve also got an attraction to a good story and I think this has some play as well. It is as if you are an actress in a drama but you have written yourself into a corner and now need a way out.
The way out is reality. Reality is: the guy is married, you barely like him, I think you’re bored and even if you could successfully push your boss away… I bet you anything you’d be looking around for the next love story within a day or two. This is who you are Workplace, so the real question is this: what do you want to do with your life and your talents? Because this is the other key - You can’t have it all.
You just simply can’t have it all and if you go back up and read your own words, you will see this is also what you are trying to do and my vote?
I say, quit your job and find a new story because this one is played out unless you want to have an affair and take the story in that direction… which is seems you do not.
Good luck.
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Confused About Her Direction in Life: Two Stelliums in Opposition - Venus Conjunct Neptune in Sagittarius
Dear Elsa,
I recently ended a relationship with my man of 4 years and moved to a nice city in a new state to live near my brother and sister. I have been job hunting for the past few weeks and so far the search has been relatively unfruitful, with a twist of bizarre thrown in for good measure. The truth is, I am finding it quite draining and I am confused about where to direct my energies.
You see, I have this long-standing block in my eternal search to find work/career that fits my needs, pays well, and makes a difference. I guess I am still struggling with what I want to be when I grow up. Also, I just don’t “live to work”, and wish that we Americans had a bit more European sensibilities about vacations and hours. At the same time, I have this really strong drive for success and am very dependable and efficient at work.
This block started in college in 1995, and I have been working with it ever since. When I feel stressed about it, I either go blank, or come up with idea after idea that I ultimately decide are unrealistic or undoable. Truthfully, I am intelligent and creative, and always get along very well with my co-workers and customers. Everyone who knows me sees great things, but I continue to feel lost in the woods on this one.
I am starting to get desperate and think that either I need to go back to school to further my education and become a teacher - or maybe come up with a small business idea and try my luck in that world. Any insight would be greatly appreciated.
Stellium in Scorpio
United States
Dear Blocked,
This may sound like criticism but it absolutely is not. Because when I see a chart like yours, I feel nothing but compassion. How can a person possibly live in these shoes?
And I have some advice for you which may sound simplistic or even stupid, however I don’t think it is. I got this from my friend Ben, who got it from Katherine Hepburn, who simply said, “You can’t have it all”.
And fact is, you can’t have it all! And when Ben ran into this concept, he found himself enormously relieved. And I suspect you may have a similar experience if you will allow this simple truth to penetrate. Because if you do, when you look around at people who are (still) laboring to have it all, I bet you smile. Been there, done that, figured it out.
So try it. Be willing to concede, accept and embrace the fact you can’t have it all and I bet you see some priorities emerge. Boy won’t that be nice.
Good luck.
~~
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Her Job As A New York Au Pair Starts In Two Weeks, She’s Waffling: Gemini Sun, Aquarius Moon
Dear Elsa,
I am about to get a BA from a small, liberal arts college in the Midwest. Ultimately I want to work in the social work field with children & families - as a family advocate or a case worker.
I took a position (no contract) as an au pair out in New York state. Lately I’ve been feeling unsure if this is the right choice for me. It’s for 8 months to a year. The family seems nice, but I’m concerned because they have me on sort of a curfew (midnight on weekdays). I know it seems silly, but I’m used to being a fairly independent person at college. Plus, I don’t know if this is going to keep me moving forward on my career goals. I’m supposed to leave to go there in two and a half weeks.
I’ve also applied to a graduate school program for social work, which I was planning on deferring if I got in… I’m basically all sorts of confused and I don’t know how to get any clarity on the subject.
Social Worker
South Korea
Dear Social
With a stellium in Gemini and Jupiter conjunct your Moon in Aquarius, you really don’t want anyone making rules that impinge upon your right to flit about and roam freely. So I am not surprised you are feeling angsty. And an argument could be made that you ought to grow up and conform; however, I am not the one who is going to make it.
I do think you should grow up - but not by conforming and subverting your nature. Instead, I think you should make your nature even larger by explaining to your employer that you are committed and will do a fantastic job, but you require your time off be yours without restriction.
You might add that you are a responsible person and have no intention of coming in drunk at 4 AM to work at 6 AM… if this is true and I suspect it is. Because you do not sound irresponsible! You just sound as if you’re wigging on a short leash and if they will allow you to be leash-free, you will probably be their dream au pair.
So I would try to communicate this. It is the mature thing to do and if they insist with their rules, you just may have a deal-breaker on your hands. And even in the worst case scenario, you’d have learned something about you.
Good luck.
~~
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He’s Sick Of Working With Lazy Slackers - Saturn Transit to Moon, Mars, Mercury T-Square
Dear Elsa,
I’m really tired of the work-a-day world filled with slackers and lazy-asses not giving a crap about anything but the pay cheque.
I have resisted this change for longer than is healthy for me. I’d like to find a job where the stress levels are related to the job itself, rather than on who’s not doing what or how wrong they’re doing it. Is there a fit that can be ciphered out of astrology to point me at the kind of work I would find satisfying?
Dissatisfied
Canada
Dear Dissatisfied,
I wish I could tell you a job change would do it, but there is tremendous conflict in your chart. I think if you make a change you will find, “wherever you go, there you are”. It would be like someone who moves across the country or even around the world and finds it make no difference whatsoever. Or someone who leaves one woman for another, only to have the exact dynamic they were trying to escape constellate in even worse form. So I am sorry to say, I would have to advise you stay where you’re at and work out why this bothers you so much.
Because the fact is, this life is as full of lazy-asses as it is of anything else. Big noses, little feet, (”Short people have no reason to live”), and if these people are going to bother you, then you can be sure the universe is going to send them to you in a stream until and unless you find a way to transcend.
As for the astrology, you have Mars (anger) square your Moon and Mercury, which suggests you are recreating some kind of scenario where you are mad at your family (Moon) and your lousy siblings / neighbors (Mercury). With Mars in Pisces, mostly likely they took advantage of you and you felt they lacked compassion. And this may be true. Your family may have been exactly like that but at this point the problem is internalized. It is yours to solve and the only thing that is going to help is consciousness.
Astrologically, Saturn is leaving Leo for Virgo here pretty quick and as it moves into aspect with this bit of your chart, I am sure you will feel increasing pressure to solve this with no means to escape. Sorry, but on the upside once you get this solved, you will get it solved forever and for good.
Good luck.
~~
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Double Cancer Woman Suffers Problems With Male Authority Figures At Work, Sexual Harrassment
Dear Elsa,
Why have my career choices been so horrible?
I hate to play victim, but it seems at each job I am on there is some drama surrounding it. Most of the time I don’t work well with male supervisors and don’t long on the job. Either the male supervisor/coworkers belittle me, or they sexually harass me.
My current position is in a laboratory and when I took the job I was told by HR the people there are extremely weird. Boy, were they underestimating their choice of words. The 20 months that I’ve been on the job, my fellow incompetent coworkers have made several serious and false accusations about my work (my supervisor has been kind enough to stick up for me, because she is sane and knows my work is great in comparison to the other coworkers). I’ve been sexually harassed and the boss of my supervisor (male) is intimidated by my work questions and chooses to act a like a jerk, because he’s afraid of not being able to answer any of my questions accurately or correctly.
My boyfriend who also works at the same place hates to hear me rant, but at the same time he has witness the harassment I have had to endure by fellow coworkers. The more I write about the fraction of my experiences here, the more I see how bad it is. HOWEVER, because each job I’ve had becomes increasingly worse (and I’ve had many), I am afraid to step out and find another job.
I would like to know if this just a curse in my chart or are there solutions? I’ve been told I have a Kite pattern which includes MC. I thought Kites were good? Why is it not helping me now?!?!?
Trouble at Work
United States
Dear Trouble,
When a scenario constellates over and over in your life, it’s because there is something you are just not getting. There is something you are supposed to uncover or discover or overcome… or something! It is not random. How can it be random when the same situation sets up time and time again, and when the common denominator in each scenario is you? Obviously you have some play here.
If this is not clear to you, just imagine a woman who has a man who beats her. The man before this one beat her, and the one before that one beat her too. Eventually she’s bound to see the pattern and get to the point where you are now. She’ll realize that it’s a pretty safe bet if she quits this man and gets a new man, he is going to beat her unless what? Unless she figures this out!
So you are having problems with male authority figures who I would suppose are acting as surrogate dads. In other words, you’re dealing with a father/daughter dynamic here. You are also dealing with a mother/son dynamic because that’s how these things work. The players go back and forth. And considering you’re a double Cancer, the astrology supports my theory; with this much Cancer in a chart, there is going to be parent/child theme in all your relationships, period.
So if you want to resolve this and break your pattern, I would start thinking along these lines. You are recreating your relationship with your father in some way, shape or form. Figure out how and you’ll have some leverage around finding a way to rewrite this script.
Good luck.
~~
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Unsure About Career In Social Work: Scorpio Sun, Capricorn Rising
Hi, Elsa
I recently graduated from university and I have applied to grad schools in social work. The idea is for me to become a therapist in the future. My problem is that I just don’t feel strongly about this. I would love to feel extremely excited and passionate about the idea of social work, and it really worries me that I don’t.
And when I think of alternatives, the options that arise are music… or some kind of interior decorating/designing, both of which I love but have no professional training in. So I am wondering if anything in my chart can explain my feelings of ambivalence towards social work, or can point me towards a field I can be more excited about.
Or perhaps I need to think in a different, more revolutionary way about social work? I would really appreciate your help.
Thanks, and God Bless,
Student
Nigeria
Dear Student,
They say that life it too short to spend it doing something you are not passionate for. But for Capricorn risings like you and me, I’d say that life is too long! And looking at your stellium in Scorpio, I have to think you’re going to prove very hard to kill - so I think your concern that you might be on the wrong path is valid… sort of.
See, your education will never be wasted because being psychologically sophisticated is an asset that is applicable to everything all the time. If you consider the symbol for Capricorn - a goat climbing a very large mountain - what you could be discovering is not that you are climbing the wrong mountain, but that the top is somewhat further off than you thought. And when you initially consider this it may upset you, but in reality it’s not that big a deal. This is just life and life unfolds.
And I’m not worried about you at all. Because obviously this has emerged and if you were intent on stuffing your feelings and committing to a career you have no passion for, you would not have written me.
So this is where you are and you are going to have to do something about it. Are you capable of that? Of course! I would bet you are more capable than 95% of the people out there and I bet you’d agree with me.
So just be still and ask the universe to show you the best path. I bet you anything it will oblige and from there you need only execute, which is a walk in the park for Capricorn.
And on a more visceral level, with all those planets in Scorpio, never ever choose the thing that has no energy for you. Because if you do, you will shrivel up.
Good luck.
~~
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