For gods sake tell me the truth! It’s ok to open it to comments.

I don’t feel safe with people. I have always had someone in my life that has bullied me and tried to control me. I get rid of one, only to get another one. I must be putting off some kind of signal that is drawing this bullshit. I have no idea what I am saying or doing that would convey this. Don’t think I haven’t thought about it, I just can’t see it. I have always used avoidance when coming up against these people. While avoidance mode works, it’s really not the way I would like to live the rest of my life. Avoiding these people makes me unhappy and disappointed in myself. I want to feel safe without having to be an asshole to do it. I am looking for a mature tactful way of dealing with this problem.

Oh creative, intelligent soul… You are safe in the creative ethers. Yet, there is that part of you that feels safe with the bullies. Why? Answer that and you are well on your way to exercising your great ability to create a world without bullies! Create, Imagine, you do that so well. Imagine a bully…now imagine it’s not there. Create and you shall be safe. Stand that bully back with your great artistic soul. The power lies in the art. Go towards the art.
Annalisa

This question is a mess to try to answer. I am sure to make all kinds of people uncomfortable and perhaps piss off legions however I want to honor this request: For gods sake tell me the truth!

I also want to maintain my reputation for saying and doing what I believe is right even if it is unpopular or possibly hard to understand so on that note…

With a 12th house Mars in aspect to Neptune the fact you would “fight” by avoiding is well shown in your chart. Mars in Taurus is also difficult as Taurus is Venus-ruled and wants to be pleasant. Having Mars in Venus-ruled Libra myself I understand this very well. I don’t like to fight either and often wonder why people such assholes. Not that this has an effect on the fact.

I mean to acknowledge you and what you are doing here but please note it is only one way to express your energy. In other words, “I can’t fight, I have a 12th house Mars,” is a cop out. You state that what you are doing is not satisfying and since there are other ways you can express this energy, you see that you are on the hook.

You asked for a “mature and tactful” solution and while I thought this high-minded I was not sure it was possible so I decided to consult on your behalf. I called the soldier on this because he is an expert when it comes to bullying. You may or may not like his message but I urge you to think about it and I mean, over time. It may take 6 months before this makes sense but what he said was that risk and danger cannot be avoided.

“Sooner of later you will have to face both…”

When I specifically asked about ‘maturity”, he said that part of maturity entailed getting your ass kicked a few times.

I realize this is not something you hear every day and something most would want to deny. However I think he’s right and I can also offer my personal experience being your peer with a Venusian Mars.

I draw bullies, too. I have gotten my ass kicked on this blog many hundreds of times. Many, many people have put up, “I Hate Elsa P” posts or entire blogs devoted to the subject and I, like you have been very oppressed by this. This went on for years and I mean like 10 of them.

For the longest time I did nothing. I did what you do. I acted like it was not happening, wished people were not mean and other things that are completely ineffectual.

There was also a period where I wished someone else would defend me. “Why doesn’t someone stand up for me?” I thought.

I was mad about this too. I was mad at people for not doing something for me that I refused to do for myself. Can you see how misguided that is?

Eventually I figured it out though. Eventually it dawned on me, I had better start hitting back and kicking some ass of my own and when I did this, sure enough the bullies left the building. Now here is how you make this work with YOUR chart:

With the Neptune influence on your Mars you have the option of avoiding. You also have the option of transcending and denying but I am not sure this is the highest manifestation of the placement and I’ll tell you why:

Like it or don’t Mars is a soldier. Mars (well expressed) is a HERO so while you are hiding under the covers the bully gets to do what? Run amok?

Why not fire up that Mars and take him out, hmm? Would this not be a service to humanity? Would this not be mature?

I think fighting your own fights is very mature and it will lead you away from the bad feelings you are having now because the fact is you don’t want to be a victim! And why should be?

You may have to mull this for some time to try to absorb what I am saying but I promise you I am not asking you to do or consider doing anything that is not described in your chart. You have a Mars, you are meant to use it but you can use it in Neptune ways. For example, undermine the son-of-a-bitch! Can you see how that is active? Mars is not meant to be turned in on itself and whenever it is, bad things happen.

For all I know you can undermine the bastard by baking them chocolate cookies (Taurus) but as far as I can see the only way out of this is action and if you want to be further motivated, you can see this as a service to humanity because it is.

By not fighting, you allow bullies to be bullies, see? How dare you? How dare you have the ways and means to stop a bully but opt to let them rule?

The bottom line (learned the hard way) is this: The only way to stop a bully is to stand up to him/her. I wish it were not this way. I wish people were not assholes but fact is some people are assholes and if you don’t want them to be assholes around you, you’ve got to take them out.

I stand as an example here. Get yourself a reputation, that’s what I did. I have a reputation for not putting up with assholes and consequently there are no assholes around me. Does this make me an asshole? Er… no and you get the same privilege.

Here’s your song:

Pic by satori

Click to read more Clearcut Astrology

Comments welcome.

Order Clearcut Astrology on your chart

Pay now and I will contact you shortly.

Click to see the chart full size