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Saturn In Virgo / Mercury In Capricorn: Time Wasting vs Working To Understand
Astrology in real life
Tam asks on Manipulation And Astrology Consulting in regards to various comments about my regret of using the word, ‘manipulation” and my distaste of political correctness… :
(snip) “Does anyone really hear/comprehend what others say?”
Great question. I think sometimes they do. Sometimes there is a direct line of communication but I have had things people have said to me take 10 years and more to register. Matter of fact I wrote a conversation I had with my sister (have not finished and posted it yet) that we had almost 15 years ago and it just registered… now. This is uncanny. It is indicative of what a poor listener I am or at least that I was.
There is no end to all the reason people fail to communicate. Sometimes people don’t listen but sometimes people say things that go over other people’s heads. Other people have a slant on someone or something so they only hear that which supports their theory and if they do hear something contrary, they spin it.
Some people are just lazy and / or arrogant. They skim something someone and rush to make a remark without comprehending (or even trying to comprehend) what the person was saying.
Having written and published provocative content on the Internet for almost 10 years now, I have gotten pretty sophisticated around not reacting to what people say. If you find me ‘reactive” all I can say is you should have seen me 5 or 6 years ago.
These days I really do try to figure out what people mean and are trying to tell me but here’s the rub: I only do this for people I care about and respect.
If the soldier says something to me that seems outrageous (as much of what he says does), I try to reserve judgment and not react because besides my feelings for him, he is a known source of good and very rare information. On the other hand if the remark I might react to comes from someone who I don’t respect, I typically ignore it.
I know there are times I do react on this blog but that is by design. What I am trying to say is I wish I’d have listened closer to my sister 15 years ago but people who make no sense to me and never have, I try not to listen to at all. I literally tell myself they must be talking to someone who can understand them, then let if float away.
Saturn is in Virgo - What have you learned about communication?
16 Responses to “Saturn In Virgo / Mercury In Capricorn: Time Wasting vs Working To Understand”
I’ve learned that there is no end to being exhausted by miscommunication! I had the opportunity to clear up some really painful hurtful miscommunication with my Dad this weekend. Something he had said that cut me to the bone. His Scorpio Mercury opposes my Sun, exact to the degree.
..what he termed his ‘real’ family. Being his child I was seriously wounded by that. If you are my father, you are MY real family so what am I to you, if not your real family?
He apologized for using the wrong word and we both marveled how one word can start something that causes things to become undone. The beauty was that he had a chance to explain himself and in the end I was on board with him, and felt sad I’d ever allowed myself to feel that unloved in the first place. My Dad’s a Libra. I love you guys:)
Jimi Hendrix:
“Knowledge speaks and wisdom listens”
Might not be exact but close enough, too lazy to google it.
This subject has been on my mind for almost a year. If you ever get really sick like I was last year you will understand how important it is for people to listen to you.
I made a special point of telling my neurologist how very much I appreciated her listening to me.
I’m learning that no matter how clear I think I am being I cannot MAKE someone understand me. in attempting to be a good listener I try to short circuit my reactions and let the communication really sink in before I try to parse it. I’m not always so good at that but I’m trying.
What Tam said.
It’s really odd- I have had the same experience as kashmiri over this week-end, with my Dad and his communication techniques, which is still upsetting me. He is Libra rising with Sun/Pluto exactly conjunct. Only difference is I have not told him how much he has hurt me over the years, which burned again when we talked yesterday. How do you make the first step?
Being a Virgo, having Mercury conjunct Venus in Virgo, and under the Saturn transit, i think that i am learning to talk less, much less; to think and digest before saying something, which, i think means that i am learning to listen… to listen with my body and with my heart, so the mind goes slower and instead of reacting, it is more a process of understanding, and then expressing what i feel about what i am receiving. I am also learning that words are energy, and that behind the words there is something more that is being communicated.
I have Saturn in Virgo and also have Venus and Sun
in 12th house Leo. My hardest thing in life
is being misunderstood. I have a great fear of
it sometimes and as another person commented I will do just about anything to be ’sure’ someone knows
I meant no harm, didn’t mean something the way they took it, etc. Pretty exhausting. I sometimes admire
the folks who say nothing when there is a
misunderstanding. What fortune. Right now with
Saturn in Leo in transit in sidereal jyotish,
I feel I need to be my own best friend!
…and I feel quieter as well. Not a bad thing
for a change.
Lynn, (((your Dad ache))).. “how do you make the first step?” maybe you don’t. Maybe he will..one day.. how has he hurt you? Is that Sun/Pluto in Leo or in Cancer? How does his Mercury look.. and how’s your own Sun ? Ah you probably know all this stuff..and I know nuffin.. just that when a person aches like that they need a hug.. and I also know that sometimes, miracles DO happen in the field of parent/child aches and pains.. my Dad is 83..and suddenly, I get him..really really get him..and he’s evolved too. The weekend for me involved wishing him happy birthday, laughing with and loving him. I wish you the same with all of my heart, Lynn xx
you brought tears to my eyes Lynne E with your compassion and thoughtful words. Thank you so much. His Sun/Pluto is in Cancer and in my 7th. His Jupiter is in his first house and after reaching out on this blog it has suddenly occurred to me to try and access his sense of humour. Communication has many threads and I think I might pull on this one. I didn’t expect your response and it means the world to me. Thanks again.X
Lynn unfortunately it was through my mum I took my first step. My mum has had problems with 2 of my sisters (there are 4 of us) and decided the easiest thing for her to do was stop speaking to all of us. (Fitting: her Mercury is in Pisces currently in aspect to Uranus).
So I was calling her and she was refusing to speak to me and ignoring my emails until I finally called her bawling my eyes out and telling her I was unable to get out of bed in the morning their disregard for me was killing me.
I let it all hang out that morning. In the process I told her how Dad doesn’t consider his kids his real family. She has seemed to snap out of it. I asked her to call me and leave me messages reminding me she loves me because it is too easy for me to feel like, you know if you NEVER call me and NEVER tell me you love me I HURT. I am in my 30s and by god I still need love.
comment eaten?
Oh yes, so Dad called and was, HUH? He’s 82 and his Cancer SN is opposite my Moon to the exact degree. That with the Mercury opposition…well it’s tough. We are actually very close, my Dad and but he doesn’t realize how cutting he can be.
My sister is Pluto/Libra ASC and he told her repeatedly in her childhood she had a black heart. With that Pluto and her 8th House Sun/Moon she has a poker face that is extremely Scorpio-like.
Maybe it’s a Cancer South Node thing, shadow side of parenting..etc who knows.
Thanks((kashmiri)) - you said you and your Dad are actually very close and I think that’s where the hurt is at it’s most poignant. Anybody else you can walk away from and cut the ties. And by god I still need love too. Communication with family can cut the deepest but also heal your heart body and soul. So his North node is conjunct your moon in Capricorn? Big emotional tie.
Oops, sorry Lynn, I got it upside down (thanks for making me look). His NORTH node is in Cancer…his SOUTH node is in Capricorn, conjunct my moon.
It has me thinking though. With Cancer NN perhaps his lesson is to be closer, and maybe it doesn’t come easy.
As for how to take the first step I am finding I have to endeavour that what I say accurately and honestly reflects what I am feeling. No farting around.
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