“Yeah, I’ve got plans for those people who think they’re going to have social hour in the pool, stand around and lollygag right there in the lane when I’m trying to swim.  You’d think they’d be able to figure it out. Look at that fat bastard, the old Koreans ladies should be saying. We better get out of here to so that jerk can burn some calories because if there were ever someone who needed to get some fat off their ass, it’s me!”

I laughed.

“But no. They’ve got to have their social hour right there in the pool, those old Koreans and the men do the same shit out in the gym by the machines. The men!  Old ladies are one thing but all these guys hang around in groups by the machines. They hang on them, they lean on them, they lollygag. Meantime I’m trying to work my ass out but can I? Not until I get rid of them I can.’t I hate those talkin’ bastards, stand around and talk all day.”

“What do you do?”

“Oh, I just go by and rip a fart. Yeah, I walk by and let a fart rip, take a lap around the circuit, just walk around the group of machines and by the time I get back to where they’re at, they’ve cleared out.:

I snorted.

“Yeah, I can smell my own fart but the rest of these guys, hell no. One of my farts and their whole faces falls off. Anyway, P, that’s what I do. That’s how I handle the shaved chest social club of men who like to gather ’round and stop a bastard from working out the way you’re supposed to when you go to a damned gym.”

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